Advice from mom's with DD's in puberty?

[peytonsmomie]

So, this is nuts, but my 8 year old has begun to develop a little bit. We have a meeting with her doctor after we get back from disney (so, about 2 weeks from now) to have her blood checked and to get a hand x-ray to make sure she's not going to start her period yet.

But we're leaving for disney in a week, and I have a problem before then! Our pediatrician said that if the underarm hair she's developed embarrasses her, we can allow her to shave it if we are comfortable with it. Which is fine with us. I mean, I hate that my baby girl is already having to deal with this, but she has really long dark brown hairs growing and she is mortified that people might see them when she wears a tank top or swims.

Problem is, she's terrified of shaving and refuses to do it. I'm certainly not going to traumatize her by forcing her, but I also don't want to be dealing with tantrums while were on vacation either.

So, for those of you with young daughters, are depilatory creams meant for bikini and underarms safe for young girls to use? I'm NOT asking for use on or around her genitals, solely asking about underarm depilatories.

Any advice, brand recommendations, etc?

Edited to add, I've already forgone shaving my own legs and underarms for nearly a month to demonstrate to her that it's normal, and that you don't have to kowtow to the societal pressures to be hair free. Unfortunately, just b/c mom is willing to be out of touch doesn't mean she's okay "looking like an escaped furball from the zoo!" I think she got that from older kids at school....

 

[RMulieri]

I don't have a DD going thru it yet, but my niece started menstruating at 9 yrs old, and also had body hair. She wouldn't shave either but used gentle formula nair, and kept it on a little less time than it says on the bottle.

 

[peytonsmomie]

Awesome, thank you.

Our primary concern with Pey starting menarche at this time is that once you start to have a period you typically stop growing (because your growth plates fuse together at that time). Since Pey is only 4 feet 3 inches tall, this would be a really bad deal for her later in life. I don't want that for her, so if the tests show that her body is getting close to transitioning, we'll put her on monthly lupron shots to delay onset.

Luckily I thought to bring up the topic when I was getting my anatomy ultrasound for this new baby at my OB's office. He had a lot more information about it for me than my pediatrician provided.

 

[liv luvs disney]

So, this is nuts, but my 8 year old has begun to develop a little bit. We have a meeting with her doctor after we get back from disney (so, about 2 weeks from now) to have her blood checked and to get a hand x-ray to make sure she's not going to start her period yet.

But we're leaving for disney in a week, and I have a problem before then! Our pediatrician said that if the underarm hair she's developed embarrasses her, we can allow her to shave it if we are comfortable with it. Which is fine with us. I mean, I hate that my baby girl is already having to deal with this, but she has really long dark brown hairs growing and she is mortified that people might see them when she wears a tank top or swims.

Problem is, she's terrified of shaving and refuses to do it. I'm certainly not going to traumatize her by forcing her, but I also don't want to be dealing with tantrums while were on vacation either.

So, for those of you with young daughters, are depilatory creams meant for bikini and underarms safe for young girls to use? I'm NOT asking for use on or around her genitals, solely asking about underarm depilatories.

Any advice, brand recommendations, etc?

Edited to add, I've already forgone shaving my own legs and underarms for nearly a month to demonstrate to her that it's normal, and that you don't have to kowtow to the societal pressures to be hair free. Unfortunately, just b/c mom is willing to be out of touch doesn't mean she's okay "looking like an escaped furball from the zoo!" I think she got that from older kids at school....

Hmmm. Don't have quite this problem, but wanted to let you know that you are not the only one with an 8 year old already developing! I heard years ago that hormones and such are causing young girls to mature much earlier now. So, I have been spending $7 a gallon for milk and doing as many hormone and pesticide free products that I could afford for nothing I reckon! (I sure wish I could have my money back. I bet it would pay for 2 WDW trips!) She already has breast buds, but no hair. I told her we were going to have to see the pediatrician and she absolutely went crazy! She has a late Summer birthday so I didn't let her start school until she was 6. It just breaks my heart to think she is going to be in the third grade with breasts and a menstrual cycle. At least I homeschool so we don't have to fool with the teasing at school, but still! I feel for you.

 

[NiniMorris]

My oldest daughter, now 26, didn't have a problem since she was blonde. My younger daughter, now 8 is having a problem. She is bi-racial (and being raised in an all white household) and was diagnosed with early puberty when she was 2...her then pediatrician gave her a couple of hormone shots and pronounced her cured! (of course he was also one of her bio-mom's drug suppliers...go figure!)

She is balking at everything, including wearing a bra...her older sister has had a talk with her about shaving, but so far is still refusing. I'm sure that once the warmer weather comes she will change her mind. I am trying not to make a big deal out of it...which is easy for us since we home school (no kids at school to tease her)

I have no suggestions for you but can definitely feel your pain. It is so hard on kids growing up...and those of us who love them.

(I don't see any reason why using a dipilatory would hurt...I would just sk the pediatrician...)

Nini

 

[peytonsmomie]

Thanks. I had hoped that my daughter's athleticism would slow things down, especially as I didn't begin menstruation until I was 17 (tmi, I know). But women in my husband's family develop much earlier, and I guess she's just taking after them .

You're right about the hormones in our food though! My OB says that OBGYNs across the country have been noticing this and agreeing about it for many years now. The hormones we feed our meat, which they then urinate out into the soil that feeds our plants, and which runs off into our water supply, is sending our daughter's through early menarche.

So even though we eat very little meat, and drink soy milk and whatnot, there's virtually no escaping it. But paying close attention to it and heading if off before it begins seems to be the best bet we've got. I don't mind if she has to/wants to begin shaving at what I consider an early age, or even if she begins getting breast buds way early, I just want to ensure that she GROWS! I want her to be able to do all the things she deserves to do, especially in the sports she loves so much!

 

[ash-n-brensmom]

When I had to start shaving...LONG TIME AGO..lol!! I didn't use a razor, I used a cordless shaver..costs more than a bottle of cream, but it isn't messy and would be easier for her to manage on her own...good luck, my 8 yo dd is growing breasts and her ped. said not to worry because it's the only symptom of puberty that is showing right now, he also agreed on the increase of early puberty with this generation...

 

[Twoboysnmygirl]

Would she be up to YOU shaving for her a few times? I can't imagine my 8 year old shaving by herself, it wouldn't hurt to have mom help I bet. Maybe once you do it for her, she will feel more comfortable and can practice with the blade covered. The creams can cause some NASTY rashes and skin irritation/burning, especially in the underarm area. I would hate for her to use them before leaving and then be miserable on the trip!

 

[Iott Family]

As a mother daughters, one aged 13, I hope this helps. She started puberty by age 9 with body odor, underarm hair and thickening leg hair growth and by 10 had her monthly. She started shaving at 11. She could have shaved a year earlier but wasnt bothered until 5th grade. Peer pressure, Im sure!

american girl makes a good book called the care and keeping of you and another called the care and keeping of your emotions, or something along those lines. They are great starter books for our girls who are hitting puberty so young. I also liked one called the period book for the tweener age. If you arent comfortable with your pediatrician, try a general family doctor or even a gynocologist. Some now specialize in young women, tweener ages. I know here my ob/gyn is in a practice with 4 other female ob/gyn and one specializes in this age group. Right now we are happy with our pediatrician and she is female so im sure that helps DD feel more comfortable.

I also just take a very matter of fact approach about this whole thing. nothing is taboo and everything is up for discussion. I make sure she has any supplies she might need, explain what they are for and we go from there. We also discuss modesty, respect for our bodies, etc.

 

[Iott Family]

Forgot to add that DD started shaving with an electric shaver until that became ineffective, then we tried the intuition razor. Now she does well with your average triple bladed disposable. We have italian in our lineage so we are a bit thicker haired. Makes for a glorious mane, never have to worry about balding!!! Anyways, an electric razor is a bit less intimidating and requires no chemicals to remove hair!

Also, if your DD is getting close to her menstrual have you thought about having her use panti liners? It helped my DD feel fresher and offered a line of protection for that unexpected start! I started my first menses on a school field trip and was so alarmed and too embarrassed to ask for help! I did not want DD to have the same embarrassment so when it became obvious her time was nearing we stocked up and showed her how to use panti liners. DD also liked the teen spirit brand of deoderant.

Again HTH!

 

[here757]

So, this is nuts, but my 8 year old has begun to develop a little bit. We have a meeting with her doctor after we get back from disney (so, about 2 weeks from now) to have her blood checked and to get a hand x-ray to make sure she's not going to start her period yet.

But we're leaving for disney in a week, and I have a problem before then! Our pediatrician said that if the underarm hair she's developed embarrasses her, we can allow her to shave it if we are comfortable with it. Which is fine with us. I mean, I hate that my baby girl is already having to deal with this, but she has really long dark brown hairs growing and she is mortified that people might see them when she wears a tank top or swims.

Problem is, she's terrified of shaving and refuses to do it. I'm certainly not going to traumatize her by forcing her, but I also don't want to be dealing with tantrums while were on vacation either.

So, for those of you with young daughters, are depilatory creams meant for bikini and underarms safe for young girls to use? I'm NOT asking for use on or around her genitals, solely asking about underarm depilatories.

Any advice, brand recommendations, etc?

Edited to add, I've already forgone shaving my own legs and underarms for nearly a month to demonstrate to her that it's normal, and that you don't have to kowtow to the societal pressures to be hair free. Unfortunately, just b/c mom is willing to be out of touch doesn't mean she's okay "looking like an escaped furball from the zoo!" I think she got that from older kids at school....

WAIT WAIT!!! i missed the boat.. LOL u can tell i dont have girls .. yet ..
u can do blood tests to see when they are gonna get their period??
x ray??

 

[Atchley]

WAIT WAIT!!! i missed the boat.. LOL u can tell i dont have girls .. yet ..
u can do blood tests to see when they are gonna get their period??
x ray??

I was interested in this too.

My DD hasn't started her period yet, but I'm sure it won't be long. When she goes to grandparents houses, I make her take her package of pads with her. Neither Mamaw would have anything if she started while she was there.

What about those Smooth Away pads that are advertised on TV. DD has dark hair on her legs and we normally do Veet but she wants to try these instead. I think I am going to let her try them. It would be easier for vacation.

 

[here757]

I was interested in this too.

My DD hasn't started her period yet, but I'm sure it won't be long. When she goes to grandparents houses, I make her take her package of pads with her. Neither Mamaw would have anything if she started while she was there.

What about those Smooth Away pads that are advertised on TV. DD has dark hair on her legs and we normally do Veet but she wants to try these instead. I think I am going to let her try them. It would be easier for vacation.

im so glad u stepped up.. LOL im am soo lost..
as were sailing away on the uss lost as heck.. care for any champane? LOL

 

[taximomfor4]

my dd is nearly 11. only 4ft 2 inches tall. She hasn't hit puberty yet. dr isn't concerned about her starting puberty at that height, says she is genetically programmed to reach a certain height. Her body will grow to that height, and then her growth plates will fuse. She had an xray done of her feet a few months ago, and they looked at the spaces by her growth plates. They know she has a bit more growing left in her!

Also, I hit puberty in middle school. I slowly but steadily grew a few more inches after that (like 3), then when I was 17, I grew another 1 1/2 inches taller.

 

[TheRatPack]

I grew after starting my period as well, and my oldest dd should as well. She started at 13 and is only 4'10 right now....no one in our family is that short and you can tell she's not thru growing yet based on her other features.

 

[peytonsmomie]

I think the growth plate fusion being an early thing due to the hormones is purely a problem that happens when they are dramatically early.

The x-rays measure first the distance between the plates, and then you do a 12 month follow up x-ray to see where they're at.

The blood test checks the hormone levels in the bloodstream.

I tried the smooth away pads on my own legs with no noticeable effect, but since I have them here at the house, perhaps we'll try them on Pey. She's not in favor of having a "razor" anywhere near her body, no matter who wields the thing.

At this point, I don't know how much of the whole "early menarche" is doctor precautionary hype, and how much is possible. I do know that my OB says he has a young woman in one of his offices they are treating who began menstruating at 9 and who is no longer growing. She's topped out at 4 feet 7. Of course, she may have other issues as well. All I know is that if there's any way to keep my kid growing, I'm gonna jump on it.

Thanks for the smooth away tip though, maybe since her hair is still pretty fine there it'll work. One can hope!

 

[peytonsmomie]

Oh, and the book suggestions are awesome! Perhaps I'll pick them up for her to read on the drive home from the world.

I also appreciated the pantyliner suggestion. I'll have to pick up a box and see what she thinks. We've already started using deodorant, but we use Tom's all natural brand because it's aluminum free. I've noticed little girl BO smells like onions! Gross! I thought I was losing my mind until one of the other moms and I from her class got to talking and we realized it's pretty much a universal stink at this age. Eww.

It's ironic how just when you think you've got a handle on the whole parenting thing, stuff comes along to show you just how little you know!

 

[2Monkeys]

I have a 10 year old DD, who has lots of body hair, but thankfully is blonde. However, she has asked if she can shave before summer, and I think I'll let her. We just got those Smooth Away pads, and it worked well enough for her. Did not remove all of the hair, but shortened it enough for her to feel comfortable for now. The only thing about them is that it takes a long time to do it...you have to be very slow and methodical - shaving would certainly be a lot quicker!!!

 

[czycropper]

Run, don't walk & get the American Girl book - it worked miracles on my now 11 year old. She got her period at 10 3/4 (actually a month before her 11th birthday) and the funny thing is that she's not a milk drinker (she stopped the day we stopped the bottle at about 20 months) so the hormones in milk doesn't hold for her! She started shaving her legs with Nair last summer after reading the book. The book is wonderful in explaining hygene, even though I told her the same thing but I guess with their hormones it helps to read it from a source that they love. My 9 year old is now in the process of reading it so we'll see how she reacts.

 

[princessmom29]

Not growing after starting your period is a myth pure and simple. No basis in fact whatsoever. Growth hormones in meat and milk being the cause of early onset of puberty it NOT fact either. There is VERY limited research that suggests that it MAY be ONE of many factors influencing early onset of puberty. Others would be better nutrition, better health care, ect. Things that have been infulencing human evolution over the past several hundred years which we are just seenig the fruits of. These are much more likely culprits than hormones given to food animals. When meat from hormone fed animlas tests positive for hormones (which by the way is rare) the levels are usually far far below a therputic level, which is the level that can realistically have any impact on human development. I think regardless of homones in meat we will see girls continue to develop earlier simply because they are healther. It is a biological imperative to bew fertile as early as possible in order to produce as many offspring as possible. It is just evolution and biology at work.

As to the real question here about shaving, have you suggested an electric razor? This is what I started with and was much more comfortable with that.