Hello,
First...
I have not read but a few of the other posts and am choosing not to read the rest. I have four children with ADD or ADHD and the preachy people get to me after a while.
The first thing you have to do is educate yourself. BEFORE any drugs. Get a second opinion from a psychologist or psychiatrist. Read everything you can get from every viewpoint. You need to get to the point where you are medicating your child to benefit them and not those around them. Once you are confident in that, you will be fine.
Then you are ready to talk medication with your doctor. 5mg of Ritalin is an extremely low dose. My 7 year old is on 40mg. Ritalin is also an unusual first choice. There are many different medications and it is hard to find the right one for your child's chemistry and needs. Then your child grows, and the meds that used to work no longer do. Also, it is a gradual change. They are not "magic" pills that you give to your child and suddenly see a change, but it is more of a realization as you are washing the dinner dishes one night that things are so much better than they were two weeks ago and you have not had a scene about not being able to find your child's shoes in a while and they actually did their homework before you asked the 25th time this afternoon.
The different meds that my children have been on are Welbutrin, Focalin, Ritalin, Concerta, Adderall and Strattera. I am not a big fan of Adderall or Strattera, but the others have all worked at various times. There are side effects such as decreased appetite and insomnia, so they also take meds at night to help them sleep.
Children with ADD and ADHD are truly amazing beings. They are global thinkers and see things in such a different light. They notice EVERYTHING which is the big problem but also a blessing. I had someone one describe it to me as watching tv. But instead of watching just one channel, it was like they were watching all 127 channels at once. Most children with ADHD are above average intelligence. They are funny, interesting and observant. They are loving, stubborn, unique people. Once you get over the adjustment of not having what society thinks of as a "normal" child, you will learn to appreciate their differences as just that....a difference not a disability.
Many children with ADHD also have sensory perception issues. It is a good idea to have an Occupational Therapist test your child for this as well. One of my children has Auditory Perception issues. I actually had him tested for hearing loss when he was 5 because I thought he was deaf. He can hear fine, he just does not process well when information is given to him verbally. I have another child that has Kinetic Perception issues. He is a klutz! But it is because he does not know where his body ends and the world begins. How frustrating this must be! He HATES tags in his clothes, shoes with his socks, to be too cold or too hot and loud noises or bright lights. I will always remember his Kindergarten graduation where he was in the middle of the class on the riser with his hands on his ears crouched down because it was too loud. Poor thing. I went and rescued him after one song. He also has dysgraphia which probably relates to the kinetic thing.
If the teacher is having trouble, but seems to be caring, then look into getting and IEP or 504 for your child. There are simple accomodations that can be made that make a huge difference. Sitting in the front row is often helpful, taking a test in a quiet, plain room often improves a score, headphones when doing homework, etc etc etc. While most educators I have come across have been loving and terrific, its important to remember that they are split 20 to 30 different ways with all the kids in their class. YOU are the only one that LOVES your child and you are only concerned with YOUR child, so you have to be a ruthless advocate for your baby. You have to be assertive, strong and get details. Its hard to do, but its up to you and you alone to get what your child needs.
I probably won't check back on this thread, but feel free to PM me. I am sure people were mostly nice and sympathetic, but frankly I have heard enough bashing in real life I just choose to tune it out any more.
Good luck and you are on the right track. Keep up the good work Mom!