ADHD, Medication and a mom confession...

[BLAZEY]

As an adult with ADHD, I dont medicate, but with that said I have the maturity to appropriately control my impulses. It sounds counter productive, but caffiene helped calm me as a child. There is plenty of research on the topic if you do a quick Google search.

My DH (39) has ADHD and was diagnosed as a child but the meds did nothing for him or made him feel sick. My MIL put him in sports to tire him out, but like a PP said caffeine seems to enable him to focus. DH drinks Coke. I know not healthy but he feels "normal" and in control of his mind after having it.

 

[bethy]

My DH (39) has ADHD and was diagnosed as a child but the meds did nothing for him or made him feel sick. My MIL put him in sports to tire him out, but like a PP said caffeine seems to enable him to focus. DH drinks Coke. I know not healthy but he feels "normal" and in control of his mind after having it.

Yes, caffeine can help a lot. That's basically what most ADD medications are: a sort of regulated stimulant. A way to methodically manage your dosage and keep it steady in your system as opposed to the more random and arbitrary nature of drinking coke or coffee.

 

[crisi]

My daughter is helped emmensely by the meds and I only wish we'd done it sooner. She didn't get on them until 10th grade.

But a girlfriends son can't tolerate them - very similar to the OP, depression and anxiety. And as a teen that was HORRIBLE, as in 72 hour lockdown horrible. He did DBT (Dialectic Behavioral Therapy) which helped a lot and is also in a charter school for the arts.

 

[TeamH5]

I could write this post myself, about my soon to be 9 year old daughter. Breaks my heart as well but I completely empathize/sympathize with you as far as feeling annoyed some days. Rather, a LOT of days.
One thing, what medication is he on?? My daughter is on Concerta, and in the way of side effects we seem to be doing OK. None that I've noticed, except if I give her her medicine on a non-school day, then she tends to get mopey.. But her teachers don't report that effect in school when she is active, involved and has something to keep her mind on.
Something our Pediatrician told us this year, is that you need to re-assess every year. If it's been 2 years since you've 'titered' his medication, it may not be affective anymore as the meds go based off of weight, and in 2 yrs a kid grows significantly. We didn't realize that and our daughter went 2 years without a titer and we discovered it was time to move her up to the next dosage.
I'm still learning this myself, but one thing we HAVE to realize as parents' of ADHD kids, is that they simply may not be capable for 'taking responsibility' as far as turning in school work, etc. Their brains at this point just aren't wired for it. I am far from perfect at realizing this, but I will work with my daughter to help her realize that there are certain things she needs to be able to do. But in the meantime, it's just as much my job to make sure she is being responsible as it is for her to be responsible, if that makes sense? Kids with ADHD like that need constant reminders. Even when I told the Pediatrician how frustrated we were because we were having to tell her EVERY.SINGLE.DAY what she needs to do in the shower (get wet, wash hair WITH Shampoo, use conditioner, use SOAP to scrub down) and if we didn't or if we just said 'Take a shower' there was no telling WHICH of those steps she would miss, and it would usually be ALL of them with the exception of getting wet. She also needs a timer, otherwise she will be in the shower for 30+ minutes and not have a single thing done, other than being wet. Lol But the Pediatrician told us that this is NORMAL behavior for a kid with ADHD, and that we would just have to constantly remind her.
Another thing that I've been meaning to try (My daughter typically can fall to sleep fairly quickly, although she does have a higher tolerance than her siblings for being able to go to sleep later and get up earlier, which I attribute to the meds), is setting her room up to be as calming as possible. A salt lamp (I've heard these help with behavior after about a week or so), low/calming light, etc.. Maybe get him used to listening to meditation or calming music to wind down at night?

Also, make sure his diet is as free of fake stuff as possible. ANYTHING with Red or Yellow dye can contribute to the hyperactivity. So for us, that means NO cheese crackers, boxed mac 'n' cheese (I make from scratch), a lot of fruit snacks are off limits as well, and a lot of juices. I apply this to ALL my kids (4 total) just so no one is left out. Lol they all have become used to drinking water only (sometimes milk). For Fruit snacks and other snacks, I buy Annies (It's Organic, no artificial colors/ingredients) for those things. It's more expensive, but worth it to me.

I feel for you, it's tough.

 

[DisneyOma]

Yeah, I've known a number of kids who had caffeine for settling down- one of my son's friends had it written into his IEP that the classroom "no food" rule did not apply to his coffee.

I'm amazed they wrote that in there - caffeine is a drug, and if it's in his IEP that he has to have it, he should be doing it in the nurse's office. What happens when he spills it, doesn't have it now, etc?

 

[Baklava]

I'm amazed they wrote that in there - caffeine is a drug, and if it's in his IEP that he has to have it, he should be doing it in the nurse's office. What happens when he spills it, doesn't have it now, etc?

Since caffeine is not legally classified as a drug, the same thing that would happen if a kid lost their IEP approved fidgit ball or medically necessary water bottle. Forcing a child to sit in the nurse's office while consuming the coffee that helps him function in a classroom would be cruel and foolish and in direct contradiction to the point of the accommodation.

If you are unclear on what constitutes a "drug" I would suggest as a litmus asking yourself if the average middle or high schooler would be allowed to consume it in the lunch room. Aspirin - drug. Caffeine - not drug.

 

[AuroraSheasMom]

My daughter was diagnosed in the 1st grade with ADHD but we didn't try medication until the summer before the 2nd grade. I completely feel your pain, OP. My daughter is now 12, plays softball (travel ball and school ball) and gets straight A's in school. However, even on medication, she struggles with organization, routines and time management. For her, the medication is necessary. She simply can't focus and her grades suffer. I can't stress enough how much using a checklist for routines can be helpful for many ADHD kids (and adults). I'm a Special Education teacher and my class routine is set in stone. Language practice, spelling and journaling. Then we check the daily agenda and work assignments (clearly posted) for what we will be doing that day in class. I model everything and have important reminders posted everywhere- "Is your name/date on your paper?", "Did you finish your DLP, spalling and journal for today". I even give my kids a grade breakdown so they can see how incomplete assignments affect their grades. Routines are important. For my daughter, checklists are a must.

Sit down with your child and make a checklist TOGETHER. Include even the smallest items. For example, DD's shower checklist includes the following: Get a clean towel and change of clothes in the bathroom with you. Make sure you have soap, shampoo, conditioner, razor, shaving cream, bath poufy and face wash BEFORE you get in the shower. Shower. Afterwards, put on clean clothes, hang up wet towel, put dirty clothes in the hamper, blow dry hair, brush hair, turn out bathroom light.
I know it seems like overkill but if she doesn't follow her list, it never fails that she forgets something. Establishing routines is an essential skill that kids need that can be very difficult for those with ADHD. Implementing a list also put the responsibility for completing tasks on your child, instead of on you to nag them to get everything done. Instead of, "Do x, y, z. Have you finished x, y, z?", I simple say, "Bring me your list" when she swears she's finished. If it's not checked, there's no moving on to phone time or other fun stuff until everything is checked off. I randomly check to make sure she's doing everything she says. If she's not being honest and not taking care of her responsibilities then she loses something, usually phone time.

Another helpful strategy I use is natural consequences. Instead of nagging or arguing when she's off task or hasn't done something, I simply state the action/consequence. "You haven't finished your homework so no T.V until it's done." or "You didn't turn in your homework so no football game on Friday". I took me a long time to train myself to be calm and not to engage with her. It's still a struggle at time but it does eliminate the arguing since I simply refuse to get drawn in. And since we have a action/consequence chart for many things, she doesn't try to argue about many of them since SHE helped come up with the consequences.

DD is on 40 mg of Vyvanse daily but we may be readjusting before too long since puberty has started with a vengeance. At the moment, she is off her meds because we are on winter break. Trust me, she will be driving me crazy by the time she starts back on her meds. I love her but she can be high energy and frustrating on good days. Hugs!

 

[NinaBella]

Take Red Dye #40 out of their diet. It doesn't have to be red to have Red Dye #40. It makes a world of difference.

Here is a website that tells you food with Red Dye #40.

http://www.red40.com/pages/foods/

 

[Accident]

Take Red Dye #40 out of their diet. It doesn't have to be red to have Red Dye #40. It makes a world of difference.

^^^ THIS. Local stores around here in the last couple months have removed any products with it from the shelf with heavy ad campaigns that they are doing so.

 

[NinaBella]

With my son (now 13) Red Dye #40 gave him severe hives. So we had physical signs of the allergy and effects. As I researched it, most of the other parents were removing Red Dye #40 as it effects on most kids is hyperactivity. A spoonful of cherry tylenol and his face would swell. Sometimes he had to go on steroid treatments for severe swelling and hives. Most of the time the hives started on his back. At home he could eat spaghetti with tomato sauce. At school the tomato sauce they used caused hives. The dipping sauce for the school chicken nuggets caused hives, etc. There are so many products that contain Red Dye #40.

Red Dye #40 can also be called FD&C on labels.

Try removing all products with the red dye for two weeks, see if it helps. Kids haven't changed, the environment has changed, specifically the way we process and package food!

 

[DisneyOma]

Since caffeine is not legally classified as a drug, the same thing that would happen if a kid lost their IEP approved fidgit ball or medically necessary water bottle. Forcing a child to sit in the nurse's office while consuming the coffee that helps him function in a classroom would be cruel and foolish and in direct contradiction to the point of the accommodation.

If you are unclear on what constitutes a "drug" I would suggest as a litmus asking yourself if the average middle or high schooler would be allowed to consume it in the lunch room. Aspirin - drug. Caffeine - not drug.

Because it is written into the IEP to bypass a class rule, it becomes a 'drug', to be handled by the nurse, at least in our school system. It is an over the counter drug, as is aspirin. Just because it is a common one, doesn't mean it isn't a real drug.

If he is taking it for a specific reason, as it controls a condition he has, then he is using it as a drug. Let him drink it at home, at lunch, and it's not a problem. Having him do it in class, and making the teacher responsible for it (as it's in his IEP, what happens if he forgets it? It stops working at the dose he is taking, etc?) turns it into a drug.

 

[Baklava]

Because it is written into the IEP to bypass a class rule, it becomes a 'drug', to be handled by the nurse, at least in our school system. It is an over the counter drug, as is aspirin. Just because it is a common one, doesn't mean it isn't a real drug.

If he is taking it for a specific reason, as it controls a condition he has, then he is using it as a drug. Let him drink it at home, at lunch, and it's not a problem. Having him do it in class, and making the teacher responsible for it (as it's in his IEP, what happens if he forgets it? It stops working at the dose he is taking, etc?) turns it into a drug.

No. It really doesn't. Because it is written into the IEP it becomes an accommodation. The teacher is responsible for allowing it, not for maintaining it. It isn't hurting anyone else and fortunately the law recognizes that and doesn't make spiteful determinations to further ostracize a child already struggling to cope with a disability. You are free to think that's wrong.

 

[NinaBella]

No. It really doesn't. Because it is written into the IEP it becomes an accommodation. The teacher is responsible for allowing it, not for maintaining it. It isn't hurting anyone else and fortunately the law recognizes that and doesn't make spiteful determinations to further ostracize a child already struggling to cope with a disability. You are free to think that's wrong.

I think I can see both sides, but I will have to take the side that a dosage has to be administered orally. To me an accommodation would be something like I am hard of hearing in my left ear therefore my IEP is to have me sit on the left, front of the classroom so my right ear is exposed to the instructor's lectures. Whenever there is something that has to be measured, a dosage involved, taken orally, that is going to have to be considered under the drug rule.

Caffeine also helps those of us with migraines. My daughter is diagnosed with migraines. So under your definition of accommodations should she be able to carry caffeine pills to take with the onset of a headache. She is in middle school and can maintain and self monitor as well... just because one is a liquid form or pill form, it is the same thing...

 

[NinaBella]

I'm amazed they wrote that in there - caffeine is a drug, and if it's in his IEP that he has to have it, he should be doing it in the nurse's office. What happens when he spills it, doesn't have it now, etc?

I agree, if the student needed caffeine, they can take a caffeine pill just as well as a cup of coffee. I would really hate to have someone next to me drinking coffee in class and I not able to do the same. LOL.

 

[Baklava]

I think I can see both sides, but I will have to take the side that a dosage has to be administered orally. To me an accommodation would be something like I am hard of hearing in my left ear therefore my IEP is to have me sit on the left, front of the classroom so my right ear is exposed to the instructor's lectures. Whenever there is something that has to be measured, a dosage involved, taken orally, that is going to have to be considered under the drug rule.

Fortunately for the children who need this accommodation, you're wrong. You can argue that you think it should be considered that, but on a purely factual basis it does not have to be because it isn't. You may not want these children to be allowed the accommodation that lets them access education, but they are.

 

[Baklava]

I agree, if the student needed caffeine, they can take a caffeine pill just as well as a cup of coffee. I would really hate to have someone next to me drinking coffee in class and I not able to do the same. LOL.

Someone else being jealous is not a reasonable (or legal) reason to exclude an accommodation.

 

[NinaBella]

Since caffeine is not legally classified as a drug, the same thing that would happen if a kid lost their IEP approved fidgit ball or medically necessary water bottle. Forcing a child to sit in the nurse's office while consuming the coffee that helps him function in a classroom would be cruel and foolish and in direct contradiction to the point of the accommodation.

If you are unclear on what constitutes a "drug" I would suggest as a litmus asking yourself if the average middle or high schooler would be allowed to consume it in the lunch room. Aspirin - drug. Caffeine - not drug.

But caffeine can be in a pill form. No need for a 'cup of coffee' to administer caffeine. A glass of tea has more caffeine than a cup of coffee as well. Really, there are several ways to get caffeine into the system.

 

[NinaBella]

Someone else being jealous is not a reasonable (or legal) reason to exclude an accommodation.

You are funny. 'Reasonable accommodation' under the ADA does not mean the school 'has to' allow a cup of coffee in a classroom when there are other alternatives. Your keep arguing something that only you see the point too. If a child needs caffeine, does not constitute that the school has to allow a cup of coffee in the class. I am actually HR and very familiar with reasonable accommodations does not always mean the person gets exactly what they ask for.

 

[Baklava]

You are funny. 'Reasonable accommodation' under the ADA does not mean the school 'has to' allow a cup of coffee in a classroom when there are other alternatives. Your keep arguing something that only you see the point too. If a child needs caffeine, does not constitute that the school has to allow a cup of coffee in the class. I am actually HR and very familiar with reasonable accommodations does not always mean the person gets exactly what they ask for.

And yet, the schools interpret it as a reasonable accommodation. I get that you would begrudge someone else coffee. I get that you think it's not fair. The schools don't agree with you. You can always go complain when some kid gets accommodated if you feel so strongly. For now it's quite a common thing and kids with attention disorders benefit from it in many districts.

 

[eeyoreandtink]

Take Red Dye #40 out of their diet. It doesn't have to be red to have Red Dye #40. It makes a world of difference.

Here is a website that tells you food with Red Dye #40.

http://www.red40.com/pages/foods/

For some kids yes, for some it makes NO difference. It isn't a magic bullet. If a child is sensitive t it, it may help to take it out of their diet. If they don't, it will make no difference at all.