Addressing your own thank you card

[mrsstats]

Is this something new? Just went to a bridal shower for nephew's future wife. They had you address your own thank you card.

Call me old fashion, but what is that all about? I took the time and effort to go buy you a gift and you can't take the time to write out your own cards?

 

[FoundMyPrince]

Well, it helps the bride or mother-to-be save a little time and get my address correct. But, frankly, I find it annoying. I fully expect to write my own thank you note someday and just leave it unsigned for the bride or mother-to-be to sign.

 

[DebbieB]

I've been to many showers where they did this. Sometimes they use them for a gift drawing.

 

[clh2]

This is just one thing that never bothered me at showers - and I have probably had at least several threads on things that have ticked me off about showers. At least it means that you might be getting a TY note.

 

[aprilgail2]

I think that is one of the most tacky things I have ever heard of people doing. How lazy can someone bethat htey can't look up and address an envelope! A baby shower is normally before the baby so its not like the new mother can use having to take care of a newborn as an excuse.

 

[wdwiala]

I don't mind it or feel like they should be "working" for the gift that I have given then. I figure that it makes the process easier. They will still be writing the thank you. I don't mind providing the address.

 

[Aisling]

Yes, I find it tacky and I'd never do that! It doesn't make me angry and I wouldn't thing less of the person having us do it, but it's one sign of the times that I won't be partaking in! My grandmother would be mortified!

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

I think that is one of the most tacky things I have ever heard of people doing.

I agree.

 

[WDWAurora]

Just realize that it usually isn't the guest of honor's decision. I've had that done at a couple of showers (I believe one of my wedding showers and one of my baby showers) and it was something the host did-not something I did on my own or asked to have done. It's been done for a while...I first saw it around the time of my wedding. DH's brother got married 5 months before we did, and I saw it at one of their showers, then at ours.

I did have a shower recently that I kind of wish that had been done at. One of my baby showers (drop-in) ended up being HUGE-as in 60+ people in attendance, plus others who had sent gifts. I did not mind addressing the thank yous AT ALL, or writing them, but a lot of the people I didn't have addresses for! It took me forever to track down some of them, because I didn't necessarily know the people well (small town, lots of my grandmother's friends, etc.). It definitely would have helped to have a way to gather all their addresses! It took quite a few phone calls to figure out who even had some of the addresses!

 

[dislaney]

For some reason this really bothers me. I agree I've taken the time to shop and buy you a gift you can take the time to write my address on my thank you note! Well I guess it means I will get a thank you since some don't even bother to send those anymore. Geesh does anyone have any manners anymore??

 

[LuvLDM]

I find it tacky.

 

[luvsmickeymouse]

Just realize that it usually isn't the guest of honor's decision. I've had that done at a couple of showers (I believe one of my wedding showers and one of my baby showers) and it was something the host did-not something I did on my own or asked to have done. It's been done for a while...I first saw it around the time of my wedding. DH's brother got married 5 months before we did, and I saw it at one of their showers, then at ours.

I did have a shower recently that I kind of wish that had been done at. One of my baby showers (drop-in) ended up being HUGE-as in 60+ people in attendance, plus others who had sent gifts. I did not mind addressing the thank yous AT ALL, or writing them, but a lot of the people I didn't have addresses for! It took me forever to track down some of them, because I didn't necessarily know the people well (small town, lots of my grandmother's friends, etc.). It definitely would have helped to have a way to gather all their addresses! It took quite a few phone calls to figure out who even had some of the addresses!

I agree with addressing your own thank you cards at this type of drop in shower that this poster writes about. I am not so sure at a regular shower because the person hosting the shower would have all of the addresses because she mailed out invitations to the people that came.

 

[bballmom56]

the person hosting the shower would have all of the addresses because she mailed out invitations to the people that came.

Exactly. She could provide a nice typewritten list to the bride to be.

 

[WDWAurora]

Exactly. She could provide a nice typewritten list to the bride to be.

I would agree for a shower like that, but mine was partially word of mouth, 2 whole churches invited through bulletins, etc. I hope that makes sense. In small towns in the south, particularly when you're from a politically involved family, things can get a little out of hand. The "grandma network" of phone calls and talking at the grocery store can mean that invites get to people that wouldn't get a mailed invitation.

I'm betting that people from big cities can't even begin to understand what I'm talking about. Things can be SO different...and the funny thing is, the small town group is the group that would NEVER do the self-addressed thank yous, but you need them more there!

 

[Cooky]

.

 

[Ceila]

I could understand circumstances where the host or recipient may not have the addresses of everyone, like people from work or fellow college students. But it is still a tacky way of getting the addresses.

Someone should be the appointed gatekeeper for collecting the gifts as people come. As they arrive, someone could be standing there with a sheet of paper and asking people for their addresses, telling them that the recipient wants to make sure she has their current address because she wants to be able to properly thank them.The recipient should do the physical work of addressing the envelopes.

ITA. I would never, ever ask people to address their own thank-you letters. I do like the idea of having someone circulate or check with guests as they arrive to make sure their addresses are correct, especially when not everyone received a mailed invitation. Since this would clearly be done on behalf of the guest of honor, it seems to be a much more polite way to approach that problem.

 

[S. C.]

Doesn't bother me.

 

[SDFgirl]

Doesn't bother me at all. I've done it at most showers I go to. Seriously, there are bigger things to get upset about.

 

[DVCLiz]

So tacky - I do this at the doctor's office so they can send me a postcard with my mammogram results - I'm not interested in doing it at a social event. If there are guests at the party who have come because of a "word of mouth" invitation, it is the hostess' responsibility to gather the addresses for the honoree.

 

[jiminyC_fan]

Tacky, tacky, tacky!