Adding male puppy to home with adult male GSD?

[luvavacation]

About 3 weeks ago, our 8 year old female German Shepherd reached the end of her suffering from Degenerative Myelopathy. She left behind very sad humans, her very lonely cat, and her now depressed 5 year old bonded sibling, a male GSD.

While she was alive, the female allowed the male to pretend to be Alpha, but when she felt a need to, she did put him in his place. It was always interesting to watch the 60 pound female put her 110 pound brother in his place! Life was harmonious, and they got along very well with the male thinking he was in charge until the female brought him back to doggy pack reality!

Since her passing, my male is just not the same. He doesn't seem to find joy anymore. We have taken him on walks, car rides, etc. He is happy to be with us, but he isn't "happy". I could go on and on about how sad he is, but those that have lost a pet that bonded with another know what he is going through.

We are considering adding another dog. Before we brought my male into the house 5 years ago, we did try to go through a shelter when looking for a sibling for my female, but that went very, very badly, and we had to return the dog. It was so, so very bad.

If we do attempt to go with a shelter again, we would go for a puppy, preferably with Lab or Golden Retriever as the dominant breed. We like larger dogs, and the personality of those breeds may mesh well with our boy. The question though, is do we look for a male or female?

I have read that with a male dog, you have to get a female, or they will fight later. Is this always the case? What trait should I look for in my male to help me decide if another male dog would be a problem for him? Is there a special personality that makes same sex dogs get along better than other personality types?

When we had my female, my male was very protective of her, especially towards the end. Not aggressively protective, but more of a need to stand next to her. He does not, however, have any type of nurturing instinct. My female had a favorite cat that snuggled with her every morning and night, and they would do mutual grooming. That cat is now lonely, and wants to try to snuggle with the dog but he wants nothing to do with the cat. Would a nurturing male be better suited for another male? Since he isn't nurturing, should I only look for a female?

I want to help my dog find joy for life again, and run and play in the big goofy way he did before, but I don't wish to cause added stress for him if I pick the wrong sex. Any thoughts?

 

[J'aime Paris]

Sorry about the loss of your dog!!

Years ago, we also had a very sad and depressed pup after the passing of his "sibling". And we ended up with another member of the family. Best thing we could have done!!! (Don't really have advice on the gender. I think it's the personality of each dog that will matter most....if they mesh well)

Our first dog was a male Cardigan Welsh Corgi. When he was around 11 years old, we added a male Bishon/ShihTsu mix to our house. Both males, but not an issue. Our older dog was very mothering to the little guy and they were buddies. When the Corgi died at 16, the Bishon was lost!

After about 5 months later, we were on the search for a new companion. We ended up with a female Lab. She brought excitement and fun back into the life of the Bishon. It really did seem to break the depression he was suffering.

And 5 years into life with the Lab, they are both doing fantastic!!
Best of luck to you!

 

[easyas123]

This has been our experience - we've only ever had male dogs FYI, with one exception:
Had a 5 year old boxer, when we decided to add a new puppy, a great dane. Boxer was a little miffed at first dealing with a boisterous puppy, but the two soon settled into a happy bond. Boxer passed away 7 years later, and our Dane was very sad. We then added a 4 year old bulldog (rescue) who had a bit of a napoleon thing going on, although our Dane (who had a SUPER easy going personality) tolerated him and put him in his place if need be. Those two got on fine for a year, when we then lost our Dane. Bulldog did seem out of sorts over losing his buddy, although because of some health issues he had, we did not pursue getting him a buddy dog. We lost him to a neurological issue a year later.
4 months without a pup in the home passed, and my husband called to say he found a Dane/Mastiff mix at the shelter (I grew up w/ Mastiffs and it was a breed we were considering getting again). He was 4 months old, and so we brought him home. Of course he turned out to be a pitt/bulldog mix of ALL things ha ha! Love those dog DNA tests! Anyway, he's a good dog, and when he was a year old we welcomed a female bulldog in our home as a hospice foster (I'm a rescue volunteer ). She was used to being the only dog, and was older. She & he got on okay, although she did put him in his place a time or two for sure! She was only with us for two months before we lost her to cancer. He didn't seem to mourn her. About two months ago we brought home a little brother for him - another Great Dane. 8 weeks old. He is now 4 months old and it's been a non-stop wrestle fest since! They get on real well.
So - we've never had a single personality issue or problem between two male dogs. I am partial to males...so I tend to gravitate towards male puppies. It is my understanding that as long as the dog coming into the home can accept that the female is in charge (assuming that is her take on things!) it shouldn't be a issue. I've always found the puppies recognize the existing adult dog as "alpha" usually, although I've never thought about it as a gender thing, rather a age & familiarity thing.
Our mixed breed pup is 90 lbs of muscle, great dane puppy @ 4 months is 55 lbs. of gangling derpitude.

 

[longboard55]

we had a companion pass and we ended up getting a brother and sister replacement. There is a huge energy difference between the ages, but the older dog seems much more happy after adjusting. Actually the two males get along better, the female is very dominate. I think it is just a personality thing

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Oh, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss! I remember you posting she had DM, but I didn't know she was gone.
Big hugs to you!

I've been in this situation, too. I tend to go for the opposite gender, and that's worked pretty well for us, but I think what's most important is that they get along, and your male can seem to tolerate the personality and energy level of the new dog. Signs he's irritated would be avoiding, growling, snapping, etc. It would be ideal if you could try to find a dog who would fit well with him.

It will take a little while for them to get used to eachother. Your dog is used to his space, but for the new dog, everything is new to him right now. I'd probably try to respect your old dog's space as much as possible while they're getting to know eachother. Maybe feed separately, keep new dog on leash when relaxing (which will help with your training). Don't just let him have a field day with the other dog. I've noticed a lot when out an about lately that people don't seem to understand or respect boundaries with dogs. Not every dog wants a bounding dog in their face. It doesn't necessarily mean they're not friendly, it just means that they're used to having their boundaries respected. Nobody seems to correct their dogs, either. It's like a free-for-all! I think if you help have your old dog's boundaries respected, they should be fine. Eventually you can probably let up on it at home once they become really used to eachother and loving.

We've been looking for the right second dog for our family for quite a while via rescues. It's been frustrating. I hope you have better luck!

 

[luvavacation]

Thanks everyone for your experiences!

Pea-n-me, I get what you mean about rescues. We had decided that getting an adult dog from a rescue was not going to work for us, due to our previous experience, so we have started looking at puppies. Went to a rescue yesterday, had to deal with a very long application form, credit check, and interview, before even seeing any of their dogs. Then, after all that, we were told a puppy under 6 months old would be $650, and what a disservice we are doing to all the other dogs by not even looking at adult dogs!

I get that they need to provide for the other dogs in the shelter, and the medical bills and building expenses, but to jump through all the hoops for $650, and then, on top of it all, to be admonished for not even considering an adult dog? I have had pets in my life since I was 1 year old, I know my pets, and I know what will work for the present mix of pets that we have. I also understand the need for a somewhat militant nature of the people at the shelter, but come on, after calling my vet directly as part of the verification process, and hearing from the vet herself the high opinion she has of us as pet parents (not to mention, we probably paid for her new car thanks to all visits with 5 pets!), why is it necessary to make my family feel as if we are unworthy of even looking at one of the puppies?

For a few hundred more, I can go buy a dog from a breeder, see the parents, and have some idea of what the puppy will grow into. This shelter is biting itself in the foot with their policies.

Anyway, I suppose we shall have to trust that the right dog will come along when it is meant to come along, but I hope it is soon, because my boy is lost and alone and he doesn't even enjoy food anymore.

People that say animals don't have feelings nor emotions are very, very wrong.

 

[Imzadi]

I also agree with everyone that the personalities of the two dogs is more important than gender. But, most important between them, determining which dog will be the Alpha, if you can. Just because you get a puppy, it may not mean down the road that it won't try to be the Alpha later. If they are both vying to be the Alpha all the time, that may be a problem.

Went to a rescue yesterday, had to deal with a very long application form, credit check, and interview, before even seeing any of their dogs. Then, after all that, we were told a puppy under 6 months old would be $650, and what a disservice we are doing to all the other dogs by not even looking at adult dogs!

I get that they need to provide for the other dogs in the shelter, and the medical bills and building expenses, but to jump through all the hoops for $650, and then, on top of it all, to be admonished for not even considering an adult dog?

Rescues are different than shelters. Rescues tend to have all those rules you have to jump through. When I decide to adopt a pet again, I won't even consider one from a rescue here, as they also ask way too many questions. I think adopting a child probably has less of an interview process than what these rescues put people through. They want to know how many hours a day I work, how long will the animal be alone? They want to call my employer and then my landlord to make sure I can have a pet, and almost all the rescues want to come in and do a home inspection to make sure my place is pet friendly & safe.

When I had gotten my previous cat, as a kitten, years ago, I simply went to a county shelter, plopped down $78 for the spaying & shots & shelter fees, and took her home the same day. The one before her was done pretty much the same way, different shelter. My next cat(s) will be done the same way.

Call the shelters to see if you can bring your dog with you to see how he gets along with the other dogs. HE may do the choosing for you.