A Vent - Stand duty for sports

[cats mom]

When I think of boosters, it seems to me it's a more focused group of people, usually parents, but sometimes just anyone interested in joining and helping whatever group or sport they are supporting. It's not expected that everyone will join and it's purely voluntary. I still remember all the boosters from the 80s when I was in band, and I'm still very friendly with them! Although I chose not to do boosters (and wasn't considered deadbeat for it) in middle school, I'll definitely join for the high school. I have yet to see anyone in the boosters complain about non-participating parents and they sure don't act put upon by it. Maybe because it's something they WANT to do and it's a choice for them? At any rate, they devote a lot of time to what they're doing and love it.

Regarding the part I took the liberty of bolding, theoretically maybe.

My kids have been involved with several sports where membership in the booster club was definitely mandatory. As with anything, some folks get very involved, go well above and beyond, and love doing it; while others fulfill the minimum commitment required.
But in my experience membership in a booster club is not always voluntary. Looks like I'm not alone either.
See klj's post below:

My daughter is in high school color guard/marching band. I just signed the paperwork for this year and if your child is involved you are automatically a Booster. We had to agree to a combination of raising $150 and working 25 hours. (This doesn't count the two people per family required to work the all day invitational.) The nice thing is that 25% of any money you raise or any funds raised with your time go to our personal account. You can pay a straight $350 fee and not volunteer or fundraise but none of that goes in your personal account. We are going to be fundraising like crazy people because our band in going to WDW next April!!!

 

[Pigeon]

This is one of the reasons my kids don't do teams sports.

I'd be happy to write a check for $25 more, but to have somebody assign me days to work a concession stand would make my head explode.

 

[surfgirl]

we are talking about 2-3 hours here (2 hour shift, 1 hour drive time). There are over 8,000 hours in a year... she is being asked to do it ONCE and can't be bothered ?

I wouldn't be bothered to be her transportation. If your dh husband truly drives her home 30 min., then I would inform her that this girl has reached the lifetime limit of free taxi rides. From now on out, each ride will be $5 one way payable immediately to cover gas costs. It isn't YOUR job to subsidize everyone else.

For all you parents who just want to sit in a chair and watch your child hit pop flies, shame on you. Who do you think is coaching them ? Every week... in addition to the coaching time, they have to deal with paperwork, planning practice (this can be a challenge when dealing with 12 little attention challenged boys in Tball!), etc. Plus there is always someone who forgot a glove, or parents are late to pickup, or whatever.

If you aren't going to step up to help, then pay a babysitter and keep your kids at home. I ran a GS troop and finally gave up when no one else would step up to help regularly. When kids were assigned snacks, parents forgot... rather than bring backups every meeting, I should have said, 'it was so-so's turn,' but I believe that embarrassing the kid for the parent's problem isn't fair.

sorry for the rant, but I get so frustrated at the 'let someone else do it' mentality. Because we are marching down a path of "someone else's" getting burned out.

 

[jrmasm]

For all you parents who just want to sit in a chair and watch your child hit pop flies, shame on you. Who do you think is coaching them ? Every week... in addition to the coaching time, they have to deal with paperwork, planning practice (this can be a challenge when dealing with 12 little attention challenged boys in Tball!), etc. Plus there is always someone who forgot a glove, or parents are late to pickup, or whatever.

Huh, ok. Sounds like it's time for you to take a break.

I am truly appreaciative of the volunteer coachs in my children's lives. However, I'm happy now dealing with paid coachs and club teams. It eliminates a lot of these issues. As long as I write the monthly check I'm good.

 

[EllenFrasier]

I didn't read through the replies, so this might have already been said.

So I take it she is willing to forgo the fee she paid for the concession stand then right? Take the fee that she would have gotten back, $10 or $15 whatever it is, and pay a teenager to do it. Problem solved.

That is what our Little League does. We do not get charged a fee or anything, but if we cannot work the concession stand we have the option of paying a teenager to work in the stand for us on our assigned day. My husband doesn't mind doing it so there is no problem for us.

 

[dawson5]

I didn't read through the replies, so this might have already been said.

So I take it she is willing to forgo the fee she paid for the concession stand then right? Take the fee that she would have gotten back, $10 or $15 whatever it is, and pay a teenager to do it. Problem solved.

That is what our Little League does. We do not get charged a fee or anything, but if we cannot work the concession stand we have the option of paying a teenager to work in the stand for us on our assigned day. My husband doesn't mind doing it so there is no problem for us.

From what I understand she was given a chance at sign-ups to pay the fee or work. She chose not to pay the fee and is now balking at keeping up working part of the agreement.

Sounds like she doesn't want to do anything. She doesn't like watching her child play/practice, doesn't want to do her part in the concession stand, doesn't want to pick up her child after practice.

 

[Jynohn]

For all you parents who just want to sit in a chair and watch your child hit pop flies, shame on you. Who do you think is coaching them ? Every week... in addition to the coaching time, they have to deal with paperwork, planning practice (this can be a challenge when dealing with 12 little attention challenged boys in Tball!), etc. Plus there is always someone who forgot a glove, or parents are late to pickup, or whatever.

If you aren't going to step up to help, then pay a babysitter and keep your kids at home. I ran a GS troop and finally gave up when no one else would step up to help regularly. When kids were assigned snacks, parents forgot... rather than bring backups every meeting, I should have said, 'it was so-so's turn,' but I believe that embarrassing the kid for the parent's problem isn't fair.

sorry for the rant, but I get so frustrated at the 'let someone else do it' mentality. Because we are marching down a path of "someone else's" getting burned out.

I am very grateful for the volunteers who make sports, scouts, etc. possible, but it isn't everyone's thing. I volunteer with developmentally delayed adults, and I'm certain that it's not something that everyone would be comfortable with. Why is it okay to judge those who for whatever reason aren't interested in working snack bars, etc.? I'm sure those people have their own interests and activities that they're involved with too.

My husband was deployed while my son played Little League. I had a 5 year old daughter that I had to take care of during games too. It was hard enough juggling work, getting DS to practice and games, and caring for DD by myself, I can't imagine worrying about having to man a snack bar too. Luckily our league was very laid back and the snack bar was on a volunteer basis. I'm grateful for those that did volunteer, and it seemed to be something they didn't mind doing. For those of us that couldn't do it for whatever reason, it was nice to be able to pay our fee and enjoy the games.

Now for those of you who haven't experienced the boosters yet, you have no idea how pushy they can be! I pay close to $300 a season for my son to play football, yet we're always "asked" (ie demanded) to buy raffle tickets, sell calendars, work snack bars, etc. In fact, I got into a bit of an argument with them last year when they "mandated" that we turn in the names of 10 friends and family members so they could send fundraiser letters out to them. I told them I had no interest in soliciting friends and family, who have kids of their own, to finance my son's extra-curricular activities. They threatened that he wouldn't be able to play if we didn't participate. I was prepared to take that one to the school board...

 

[Mkrop]

I am very grateful for the volunteers who make sports, scouts, etc. possible, but it isn't everyone's thing. I volunteer with developmentally delayed adults, and I'm certain that it's not something that everyone would be comfortable with. Why is it okay to judge those who for whatever reason aren't interested in working snack bars, etc.? I'm sure those people have their own interests and activities that they're involved with too.

My husband was deployed while my son played Little League. I had a 5 year old daughter that I had to take care of during games too. It was hard enough juggling work, getting DS to practice and games, and caring for DD by myself, I can't imagine worrying about having to man a snack bar too. Luckily our league was very laid back and the snack bar was on a volunteer basis. I'm grateful for those that did volunteer, and it seemed to be something they didn't mind doing. For those of us that couldn't do it for whatever reason, it was nice to be able to pay our fee and enjoy the games.

Now for those of you who haven't experienced the boosters yet, you have no idea how pushy they can be! I pay close to $300 a season for my son to play football, yet we're always "asked" (ie demanded) to buy raffle tickets, sell calendars, work snack bars, etc. In fact, I got into a bit of an argument with them last year when they "mandated" that we turn in the names of 10 friends and family members so they could send fundraiser letters out to them. I told them I had no interest in soliciting friends and family, who have kids of their own, to finance my son's extra-curricular activities. They threatened that he wouldn't be able to play if we didn't participate. I was prepared to take that one to the school board...

It is not my thing either but I also know that it is my responsibility to do this if I want my son to play in this league. Believe me this will be utter torture for me, I also volunteer elsewhere but I feel this is my parental obligation if I sign my kid up.

I could have had my son play at a different level so I would not have to deal with this but when I agreed for him to play I have to "pay" so to speak with my time, we dont have a buyout option.

DH will be out on the field coaching or umping when I do this so I am going to have to ask my DMom or Dbro to help me out with my youngest on my two days of duty. I know this is not easy for some people, if they dont have help in the area but it is what is required of the parents so I do it.

Now in other area, say school there are many opportunities to help, so if working the Fashion Show is not your thing but making copies for the teacher is then great but here you dont have a choice.

 

[surfgirl]

Why is it okay to judge those who for whatever reason aren't interested in working snack bars, etc.?

One hour out of an entire year will kill you ? I'm not interested in it either, but it essentially the price of admission (or in this case, being in the league).

Now for those of you who haven't experienced the boosters yet, you have no idea how pushy they can be!

Fair point. I agree that I hate fundraising and there are times I feel like I'm raising money to spend on things that aren't worth it.

I have an issue with people who don't want to volunteer or donate money ilo volunteering. If you can't afford it, there are typically community organizations that you can apply for that will cover your costs. In this day and age, there is no free lunch.

 

[2Kds2K9]

Had to wait a few hours here to settle down before I responded.

My DH is the head of Softball in our local youth league. Every single person in the organiztion is a VOLUNTEER. This includes everyone from the president of the entire youth league on down to the coaches and assistant coaches. The amount of time that these people put in to make these organizations run is countless. There are meetings year round to make sure that things are planned for the future and are currently running smoothly. Uniforms to be ordered. Teams to be formed. Clinics to be run. Schedules to be made and then changed several times. Umpires to be requested. These volunteers do things above and beyond what could ever be expected of them.

I could go on and on about what these people do and that it's the same people doing it year after year. It burns my butt that there are people who will not get off their lazy butt to drive 30 minutes to help an organization that has done so much for their child. She should be ashamed of herself.

Off my soapbox and getting ready to support my sons Lacrosse team by working in the snack shak. And I will do it proudly this evening!

 

[Anne34]

Regarding the part I took the liberty of bolding, theoretically maybe.

My kids have been involved with several sports where membership in the booster club was definitely mandatory. As with anything, some folks get very involved, go well above and beyond, and love doing it; while others fulfill the minimum commitment required.
But in my experience membership in a booster club is not always voluntary. Looks like I'm not alone either.
See klj's post below:

In high school it is mandatory to be part of the booster club. You also are expected to sign up to work meets or find someone to do it for you. This has been true for my DS soccer and DD swimming.

My daughter's swim team each family is expected to work at the meets. If you don't show up at the meet to work (without finding someone to do it), you are charged $100 and your child can't swim until it is paid.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Had to wait a few hours here to settle down before I responded.

My DH is the head of Softball in our local youth league. Every single person in the organiztion is a VOLUNTEER. This includes everyone from the president of the entire youth league on down to the coaches and assistant coaches. The amount of time that these people put in to make these organizations run is countless. There are meetings year round to make sure that things are planned for the future and are currently running smoothly. Uniforms to be ordered. Teams to be formed. Clinics to be run. Schedules to be made and then changed several times. Umpires to be requested. These volunteers do things above and beyond what could ever be expected of them.

I could go on and on about what these people do and that it's the same people doing it year after year. It burns my butt that there are people who will not get off their lazy butt to drive 30 minutes to help an organization that has done so much for their child. She should be ashamed of herself.

Off my soapbox and getting ready to support my sons Lacrosse team by working in the snack shak. And I will do it proudly this evening!

While I appreciate what the volunteers do it doesn't mean that I want to/can volunteer for that particular thing. I PAY for my kids to be in sports. Yes- the league does do a lot but I do contribute by PAYING. If you asked me if I could help out then I would very likely do it unless I simply could not for whatever reason. I do volunteer quite a bit actually. For me- I would rather pay than have to give up my time for things like that. It's not that I can't be bothered but I simply have very little time left at the end of the day and I would rather spend it with my family than selling hot dogs. I buy the raffles, contribute (and most of the time organize) the coaches gifts etc. I do not like being told you MUST be here on such and such a day and time. Oh- and yes, I do want to watch my child play. That is why I come to the games. If I didn't want to see them play I would stay home. It is important to me and I shouldn't have to miss it because someone else decided it wasn't important enough. FTR- I have volunteered to work the snack stand at one of our leagues. Of course we schedule it so that you work a half hour before your child plays and the parents trade off. This way nobody misses their child playing.
I truly do appreciate the people who volunteer. Really I do- but the same way that they like to volunteer for say baseball would they really like to volunteer the same amount of time for the PTA? Most wouldn't. People like to volunteer for things they think they will be good at.

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

In high school it is mandatory to be part of the booster club. You also are expected to sign up to work meets or find someone to do it for you. This has been true for my DS soccer and DD swimming.

My daughter's swim team each family is expected to work at the meets. If you don't show up at the meet to work (without finding someone to do it), you are charged $100 and your child can't swim until it is paid.

The question to me is this

Each meet you have a choice -- you can work, or you can pay an extra $100 for your child to participate. We're fine with either choice, but if you decide to pay your account needs to be current before the next practice.

Or is it?

You absolutely have to be there for the meet -- if you're such a terrible parent that you don't do your duty we'll punish you -- the first time the punishment is $100, next time it could be worse. We'll still talk about behind your back even if you pay.

As a parent who sometimes can't work a meet on Saturdays, or at least not without sacrificing more than $100 income, I would sign up for a team like the former, not the latter. When a meet rolled around I'd do my best to arrange to be there, or to find someone I could trade with (not neccessarily trade working for working, maybe I could trade another service) but I'd also probably rely on the pay option once or twice a season.

On the other hand, if it were the latter I'd avoid that team. Not because it's bad, but because I wouldn't commit to an obligation I couldn't keep.

It seems to me that the OP's team started out like the former -- you could volunteer or you could pay, and the it morphed into you have to volunteer.

 

[kirstenb1]

In high school it is mandatory to be part of the booster club. You also are expected to sign up to work meets or find someone to do it for you. This has been true for my DS soccer and DD swimming.

My daughter's swim team each family is expected to work at the meets. If you don't show up at the meet to work (without finding someone to do it), you are charged $100 and your child can't swim until it is paid.

I have suggested several times to our Aquatics Director that there either needs to be an incentive to volunteering, or a punishment to not doing it. I see the same exact parents volunteering right beside me every time, while the rest sit in their folding chairs. Makes me crazy!!

 

[Mkrop]

While I appreciate what the volunteers do it doesn't mean that I want to/can volunteer for that particular thing. I PAY for my kids to be in sports. Yes- the league does do a lot but I do contribute by PAYING. If you asked me if I could help out then I would very likely do it unless I simply could not for whatever reason. I do volunteer quite a bit actually. For me- I would rather pay than have to give up my time for things like that. It's not that I can't be bothered but I simply have very little time left at the end of the day and I would rather spend it with my family than selling hot dogs. I buy the raffles, contribute (and most of the time organize) the coaches gifts etc. I do not like being told you MUST be here on such and such a day and time. Oh- and yes, I do want to watch my child play. That is why I come to the games. If I didn't want to see them play I would stay home. It is important to me and I shouldn't have to miss it because someone else decided it wasn't important enough. FTR- I have volunteered to work the snack stand at one of our leagues. Of course we schedule it so that you work a half hour before your child plays and the parents trade off. This way nobody misses their child playing.
I truly do appreciate the people who volunteer. Really I do- but the same way that they like to volunteer for say baseball would they really like to volunteer the same amount of time for the PTA? Most wouldn't. People like to volunteer for things they think they will be good at.

And so do I pay, and so does the coach's kid pay, and the ump's kid pay etc. AND they give of their time. We all pay but we would have to pay A LOT more if we had to pay coaches, umps, and snack bar people. It is not easy to keep these organizations running and most of the ones my kids deal with are run by volunteers, or we would have to do a insane amt of fundraising which I would not be thrilled with either.

 

[cindermomma]

As a Mom who is assigning our boys baseball concession stand - I totally feel for you OP. My DH has coached our DS's team for 4 years (since he started playing baseball). Last year, we had to absorb another team due to no coach on that team - 22 boys. I read a few posts, and it saddens me that people think writing a check makes everything ok. I know you are busy - as are we. I just read about another team in our area that is starting a new policy about their concessions. The parents will have to give them a $100 check (in addition to team fees, ect), that will only be cashed if they don't work the concession. The coach also is told to make your child sit out of a game for the length of time you should have worked. I think this is a great idea. This way, the folks that would just rather write a check can do so. Not sure how I feel about making a kid sit out because of mom and dad though. I don't think my DH could do that. We are all volunteers that run the ball association. No parents will help, heck I don't think DH has ever even been told "Thanks for coaching". It has gotten to where there is a small group of us running everything and makes it that you get tired of being the only one volunteering. (DH wasn't suppose to coach this year - nobody else signed up!). No real advice OP - just all my support and well wishes.

 

[luvsJack]

You know, this complaint that "there are only a few of us doing the work" isn't really anything new. I was one of the "only ones" 12-14 years ago, my sister was one of them 16-18 years ago and I am sure it went on before that. That doesn't make it ok, but just goes to show that its not going to change any time soon and, for me, it just got easier to accept it and go on.

No matter what the leagues do, there will still be parents that won't help with the work and its sad that the kids will be the ones to suffer. Its really not fair to the kids.




I would like to ask: Why do you assign people to work? Why not allow them to choose the time to work? People seem much more cooperative to me when you allow them a choice.

I noticed something with a few community leagues that dd has played for, too. Cheerleading, basketball and softball for ages 7-12 were all headed up by the same 5 ladies. They did all the work. One Saturday after dd's basketball game I offered to help in the concession stand. They just went on and on about how nice it was of me to help. I suggested to them that they send out a sign up sheet asking for people to help out--like I did back when my sons' played ball. They wouldn't do it. They were so clannish about the whole thing that, although they fussed about no one helping, they really didn't want help. They seemed to be happier doing all the work and griping about other parents not helping. Not saying anyone here would do that, but sometimes that is the reason parents stop helping.

 

[2Kds2K9]

It is a shame that people feel that writing a check is just going to make it happen. People make it happen and fortunately, it's the same people year after year.

I've been fortunate enough to be a SAHM and have done a lot of volunteering through the years. And it's ALWAYS the same parents who are there. AND it doesn't matter if they work outside of the home or not. Heck we have high level executives who make time to come and help in THEIR KIDS ACTIVITIES!

Yes, we are all busy. But, there is no excuse why one can't give up one hour of the day to go and either sling burgers or help sell snacks.

I'm sure that if there were no volunteers to make things run, those who don't volunteer would be the first to complain. (Yes, I've heard it!)

Again, shameful!

 

[Art 1]

You did right by assigning a time, that's the only way it can be done.

She is a pig, and just doesn't know any better, I would just let it go.

 

[cindermomma]

You know, this complaint that "there are only a few of us doing the work" isn't really anything new. I was one of the "only ones" 12-14 years ago, my sister was one of them 16-18 years ago and I am sure it went on before that. That doesn't make it ok, but just goes to show that its not going to change any time soon and, for me, it just got easier to accept it and go on.

No matter what the leagues do, there will still be parents that won't help with the work and its sad that the kids will be the ones to suffer. Its really not fair to the kids.




I would like to ask: Why do you assign people to work? Why not allow them to choose the time to work? People seem much more cooperative to me when you allow them a choice.

I noticed something with a few community leagues that dd has played for, too. Cheerleading, basketball and softball for ages 7-12 were all headed up by the same 5 ladies. They did all the work. One Saturday after dd's basketball game I offered to help in the concession stand. They just went on and on about how nice it was of me to help. I suggested to them that they send out a sign up sheet asking for people to help out--like I did back when my sons' played ball. They wouldn't do it. They were so clannish about the whole thing that, although they fussed about no one helping, they really didn't want help. They seemed to be happier doing all the work and griping about other parents not helping. Not saying anyone here would do that, but sometimes that is the reason parents stop helping.

Believe me, there is nothing clannish here. (not saying you said that). We have tried the sign up thing as well. Then, we had nobody signing up to do it. Then when the stand isn't open - look out for the complaints (from everyone). Not really sure what a perfect solution is - probably doesn't exist. Best of luck to all parents of ball players/cheer squads/basketball/ ect that has to work/assign/sign up to work.