A Plea: People Posting Confidentially

[SaraJayne]

Ok, the peopke who deliberately "out" posters are kind-hearted, nice people.

No one was outed. I must be on more "ignore" lists than I thought.

 

[Aisling]

Like I said earlier, the poster never "outed" anyone. They didn't say "OMG, this poster is Liberty Belle!". So I really don't see what all the fuss is about.

SaraJayne, I'm sorry, I think you're referring to an actual incident?? I don't know anything about it if something recently happened that you're referring to. I was speaking in general. Sorry to misunderstand.

 

[SaraJayne]

SaraJayne, I'm sorry, I think you're referring to an actual incident?? I don't know anything about it if something recently happened that you're referring to. I was speaking in general. Sorry to misunderstand.

Yes, I'm talking specifically about one thread that showed up on the CB today.

 

[ilovemk76]

You have the right thread. DEA posted there and made this thread about the same time.

She is now trying to pretend that was not her intent. You know she is on of the good ones and would never do that!

That's what I was thinking as well. Unless I'm mistaken about which thread most people are referring to (and I don't think I am, since this sort of discussion is now going on in that thread as well) no one ever posted the other person's real username. They just said it was easy to figure out who she is. I wouldn't consider that "outing" someone.

Now posting someone's username on a thread where they are trying to be anonymous is probably somewhat mean-spirited, unless the anonymous poster is clearly trying to stir up trouble. But pointing out that someone isn't as anonymous as they seem to think they are just doesn't seem like a big deal to me. Saying "I know who you are because you posted about this yesterday under your real name" doesn't give anyone any more to work with if they want to search for the poster than the poster has already given everyone. I don't see why someone pointing it out would make it any more likely that other posters will attempt to figure out who the anonymous poster is. If they are trying to puzzle out the anonymous poster's identity, they are probably doing it whether or not someone else says they've already figured it out.

 

[Uncle Remus]

You have the right thread. DEA posted there and made this thread about the same time.

She is now trying to pretend that was not her intent. You know she is on of the good ones and would never do that!

But who's Mrs.Snarky?

 

[ilovemk76]

SaraJayne, I'm sorry, I think you're referring to an actual incident?? I don't know anything about it if something recently happened that you're referring to. I was speaking in general. Sorry to misunderstand.

Search on my previous post and you will see the exact comment.

 

[ilovemk76]

But who's Mrs.Snarky?

Why aren't you asking a private question in a PM?

 

[hambirg]

It is not the content that they want to be private (the dialogue). They are actively seeking a response. It is their identity that they want to keep private. "People Posting Privately" would have made for better alliteration, but is inaccurate for this discussion thread. Nor are they posting anonymously; there is material that can tie them back to some other data store that contains their real name. At best, it is an attempt at confidentiality, in the strictest sense.

Yes, but it is the content of the dialogue that basically outs them. My point is that they out themselves.

I'm not a big fan of the "alias" threads. I think there is enough anonymity on a message board using User ID's anyway. But fine, if someone wants to start a thread using an alias, please don't include so much personal detail that you have already posted under your User ID, that it is easy to identify you. And then don't get mad when someone says, "Hey, we know who you are because you have already posted all this stuff before under your User ID." My own personal opinion is they didn't like the advice they got the first time around so now they are posting again under an "alias" in hopes that they hear what they want this time. I don't think that applies to everyone posting under an alias. . .just sometimes.

 

[DEA]

You have the right thread. DEA posted there and made this thread about the same time.

She is now trying to pretend that was not her intent. You know she is on of the good ones and would never do that!

Hi there. First, I'm a guy.

Second, and I thought I had made this clear, there have been more than one thread on which this sort of thing has happened. There is no "right thread". There are threads in which people trying to post as anonymously as possible have had attention drawn to their main identities, the very identities they were trying to hide.

My intent was, and is, to get people to not do this. If you feel as though this is only about you, you are mistaken. If you feel personally attacked by my general statement at the beginning of this thread, please understand that I was trying to not draw attention to ANY particular thread, which is why I made it a separate thread not referencing any specific content.

If you would like to take it personally, I cannot stop you. If it were personal, though, I would have brought it up in the thread, identified you specifically, and suggested that calling attention to someone's "true" identity when they were trying to get that distance may be detrimental. Instead, I saw yet another instance of someone trying to maintain some anonymity while trying to get help, and the discussion turning into a guessing game. This thread, though, is not about you. It is about something I keep seeing happen. You are not responsible for it all.

 

[ilovemk76]

Oops, sorry about the gender error.

It seems lime many here saw it as that thread.

I am not taking it personally. I am mostly laughing at how worked up others got over a comment that was just a factual statement. I also found it funny that not a single one of them sent me a PM. I would have deleted the comment then but now it can stay as it has been quoted.

Hi there. First, I'm a guy.

Second, and I thought I had made this clear, there have been more than one thread on which this sort of thing has happened. There is no "right thread". There are threads in which people trying to post as anonymously as possible have had attention drawn to their main identities, the very identities they were trying to hide.

My intent was, and is, to get people to not do this. If you feel as though this is only about you, you are mistaken. If you feel personally attacked by my general statement at the beginning of this thread, please understand that I was trying to not draw attention to ANY particular thread, which is why I made it a separate thread not referencing any specific content.

If you would like to take it personally, I cannot stop you. If it were personal, though, I would have brought it up in the thread, identified you specifically, and suggested that calling attention to someone's "true" identity when they were trying to get that distance may be detrimental. Instead, I saw yet another instance of someone trying to maintain some anonymity while trying to get help, and the discussion turning into a guessing game. This thread, though, is not about you. It is about something I keep seeing happen. You are not responsible for it all.

 

[FireDancer]

No one was outed. I must be on more "ignore" lists than I thought.

Yeah, that is kind of the funny part. If I go SaraJayne, I know your real name, SS#, date of birth, and complete medical history but stop there and don't actually post what any of those are I haven't outed you. No one knows anything more about you than they did 2 minutes ago other than I know who you are.

 

[Buckalew11]

Out of curiosity I went and looked at the thread.

While it wasn't a full-fledged "outing", One has to wonder why she had to say well, since you moved from here to there, mentioned the baby issues, and the job and why that was even mentioned at all. I guess I do not get that part at all. The poster was asking for help, advice--not sure why the need to mention all that came up at at.

Now, if someone is posting about their extravagant trips one day and the next day they are saying they need to file bankruptcy, I don't mind knowing that that type of thing is going on--it makes a difference in their story. Frankly, I don't want to waste my time giving someone sympathy who is abusing the system.
I think if someone starts trouble on here, gets banned and comes back over and over starting more trouble, I'm all for outing that person--I've done it myself.

 

[DEA]

Oops, sorry about the gender error.

It seems lime many here saw it as that thread.

I am not taking it personally. I am mostly laughing at how worked up others got over a comment that was just a factual statement. I also found it funny that not a single one of them sent me a PM. I would have deleted the comment then but now it can stay as it has been quoted.

Maybe they see it as that thread because your first post on this thread referenced details from that thread? Maybe?

As for leaving your post in that thread, you could always delete that post and ask the quoters to do the same.

 

[disykat]

Yeah, that is kind of the funny part. If I go SaraJayne, I know your real name, SS#, date of birth, and complete medical history but stop there and don't actually post what any of those are I haven't outed you. No one knows anything more about you than they did 2 minutes ago other than I know who you are.

They did, however, learn something pretty important about the poster who claims to know those things.

Actually, you don't have to name names to "out" someone. Saying stuff like "oh, I know you. Your spouse works at xxxxxx, you posted this x days ago, aren't you from ...?, etc. can pretty effectively out someone - especially to fellow stalkers who will then add that to their stalking info.

 

[Aisling]

Yeah, that is kind of the funny part. If I go SaraJayne, I know your real name, SS#, date of birth, and complete medical history but stop there and don't actually post what any of those are I haven't outed you. No one knows anything more about you than they did 2 minutes ago other than I know who you are.

Duh FireDancer. That's what "outing" means.

 

[Aisling]

I am mostly laughing at how worked up others got over a comment that was just a factual statement..

Just please do me a favor. If I post under a new name seeking advice for a problem, please don't let on that you know who I really am. I'd appreciate it. Thanks in advance.

 

[Scurvy]

Yeah, that is kind of the funny part. If I go SaraJayne, I know your real name, SS#, date of birth, and complete medical history but stop there and don't actually post what any of those are I haven't outed you. No one knows anything more about you than they did 2 minutes ago other than I know who you are.

Duh FireDancer. That's what "outing" means.

No it doesn't. If Firedancer posted all that, no one but Firedancer would know who SaraJayne was. They wouldn't know any more about her than they did before he posted. The only new thing they would know would be that Firedancer supposedly knew all that information. If Firedancer posted that SaraJayne was actually Mary Smith from Orlando, Florida, then he would be outing her (assuming he was right about who she was). Posting that he knows her name - but not sharing that name with anyone - doesn't "out" her at all.

 

[Aisling]

I'd just be embarrassed and hurt if someone did that to me. I know there's no guarantee of privacy on the internet, but I'd hope people would be decent enough to let me be anonymous when I'm asking for anonymous advice.

Not saying anyone outed anyone specifically. Just in general.

 

[Aisling]

Posting that he knows her name - but not sharing that name with anyone - doesn't "out" her at all.

Oops I put my foot in my mouth again. Sorry, FireDancer. I take back the duh. I thought you meant knowing AND positing the name.

Jumping off this ship now!

 

[Uncle Remus]

But who is Mrs. Snarky?