7 year old Son having "squirts" during the day.. What to do? HELP!

[Grendalynn]

I need some advice.... My son who is 7 1/2 is almost wetting his pants nearly everyday! He has little squirts here and there throughout the day and I don't know whatto do. Last year in the beginning of the year, in first grade, he literally wet his pants - which is fine- New settings, learning experience, still little....

He still has wet nights here and there, but DH had an underdeveloped bladder when he was little, so I am not super concerened with that aspect...yet.

But now he is pushing 8 and still having "accidents" during the day... I have tried being supportive and undertanding, but now it is just plain not OK... Please don't flame me - I am not looking for criticism, I am looking for advice and/or what to do next. I think that most of his problem is that he is afraid that he is going to miss something, so he puts it off and put and puts it off, afraid to pull away and go to the bathroom and come back to whatever it is that he was doing. I don't want him to keep having these acciden ts and have it happen at school and the kids make fun of him or whatever ....

I have tried being supportive and understanding, but now I am just frustrated!! What should I do now??

 

[mdinecola]

My 7 yo was having the same problem. He went from being fully potty trained at 2 years old, to wetting again at 4 and when we thought we had that cleared up, he was doing it again last year. No medical condition - I had him checked out for kidney reflux, etc. We tried everything - I even explained to him that this is why he was red and chafed and that it smelled, etc, etc. What worked for us was a calendar with stars. If he went a full week with a star on each day, he got 2 dollars for his Disney savings. If not, he forefeited the whole 2 bucks. Money talks! It worked and now he stays dry all day. I even let him pick out some of those boxer briefs to wear now, so he feels big about it. Now if we can just tackle the bedwetting!

 

[minniebeth]

I was told by several people that boys' bodies and bladders do not grow at the same rate (medically, I don't know if this is pinpoint accurate).
So that around the time of 7, 8 or older, that when they go through a growth spurt, their bladders don't keep up with their size. Of course, they eat and drink more... A friend of mine put her son on a "schedule" of using the restroom whether he had to or not throughout the day. This seemed to help, and teachers were supportive of it.
Bedwetting at night for older boys seems to be more common than people realize. I think it's because no one talks about it.
Ya'll are not alone...keep the faith!

 

[luvdiz2]

Wow, I thought my son was the only one! I too was worried that he would be made fun of "the smelly kid"; I too saw the red, chafed area and couldn't understand why.

However, I found that when he went to school it was worse, and almost stopped on our WDW holidays

I believe it was somewhat underdevelopment, missing something, but for him mostly stress. Pulled him from school and have had little trouble with it.

You are not the only one, and I figure that he won't be doing it too much longer. I am lucky, he doesn't wet the bed

 

[RumpleMom]

Did you check with the pediatrician about an urinary tract infection?

 

[Not so Dumbo]

I would check with his doctor and make sure it's not medically related. If it's not, then I would have him try to use the bathroom before he goes out to play or starts an activity that he may not want to take a break for.

 

[Tissa]

Sorry I don't have any good advise for you because my ds does the same thing. He just gets too involved in things and won't go until it's at the point he has to run to the bathroom. I'm at the point now that if he keeps doing it at home then he's not going to be able to return to whatever he was doing that was so darn interesting. We don't problems in school because there is nothing that interesting going on there

 

[badblackpug]

My step daughter did theis, too, at this age. I think you are right it is the "i don't want to miss anything" mentality. Try putting him on a regular toileting schedule, say every 2-3 hours. He will get so tired of being nagged to go to the bathroom that he will start doing it himself. Of course, I would 1st have a complete check up at the pediatrician it could be UTI, or kidney infection, or overactive bladder.
I wouldn't, however, punish him, though. I think this is pretty normal at this stage. Kids just get so involved in what they are doing that somthing as mundane as going to the bathroom just slips their minds. A reward system for staying dry, may be a good plan.

 

[la79al]

Make sure that there are no consequences at school for using the bathroom too often. I know this sounds silly but I have worked in several schools where kids will walk around doing 'the pee dance'. When I ask why they won't ask to go to the bathroom, they tell me they are only allowed three trips to the bathroom per week aside from class stops at the bathroom. Using more than these three trips results in loss of recess minutes. Or maybe child's teacher makes it a huge performance when child asks to use the bathroom. Either will prevent kids from asking. As far as bedwetting, we found that what worked the best was cutting off anything to drink 1 - 1 1/2 hours before bed. Child then gets a SIP of water before bed. During this no drinking time, make child use bathroom every 15 minutes. Child will complain, but it worked pretty well for us.

 

[okeydokey]

As long as it is ok with the teacher, is there some way he can program a watch to beep every, say, 2 hours. That will be his signal to use the bathroom. My six year old still wears a pull up at night, and our ped is not concerned. He said he will grow out of it. My son is pretty small, still only 41 pounds, so maybe he just has a tiny bladder.

 

[ont/ohana]

Hi Oh my do I ever hear you. My 6year daughter was TT at 2 and for the last year and a half she hsa had regular wettings. The smell and chaffing dose'nt seem to bother her. I always send a change of clothes to school with her. We went to the DR. last year and had exrays, urine tests,elimited stresses etc.. the chart and stickers worked almost 98% of the time. I stared putting a small panty liner into her undies. She did not lkie it at all as she related it to a diaper. I told her if she didn't stop doing this at school I might have to keep her home. She is so much better now. My DH and I and BigDD support her every time she is dry at bedtime. She hardly ever wets at night. We seem to only have reoccurances when she is very tired or sick. This we can live with. Good Luck and try the reward system-it worked pretty good for us!

 

[Grendalynn]

Sounds like I am not alone here ... Thanks os much for the feedback and moral support.

DS doesnt have the chaffing, never has. And hopefully we wont get their either! And lke I said - he usually only has "squirts" not an entire emptying of the bladder when he does go. Just enough to give hima little "reminder" and make a little bit of a mess. Sometimes its been enough to soak through, but not often. Only once at school has he totally out and out wet his pants...

The bed wetting thing is another story and I am not hugely concerned wit that just yet. Pull ups work fine for now; here and there and sheets are washable... I think that is more of a developmental thing and growth thing than anything else. One step at a time ...

Thanks again and I hope to see more responces.

 

[dougsmom98]

My son (5) still wets the bed quite a bit and the doctor said there is a really good pill to stop this from happening - I don't remember the name. It is not habit forming and it can be used for special occasions such as a vacation or sleep over. I decided against it for now, but if he starts going to sleep overs I will use it. My aunt has trouble during the day and night and they gave her the same pill and it really helps. I would definately talk to the doctor whether you decide to use the medication or not. The doctor could write a note saying that he needs to go on a set schedule and this will make it so he is not penalized by the teacher.

 

[Grendalynn]

Well, fortunatly, we have no issues on the school front. DS has a bathroom right in his classrom and I spoke with his teacher about it and she has been very supportive. His school "loops" which means he will have the same teacher this year as he did last year. She is super and kept her eye on him last year.

I actually picked up some hopeopathic pills at the supermarket and tried them only once - no luck. But we wil try again - they are 100%lactose...

 

[seashoreCM]

If DS has more problems at school there could be some underlying psychological problem, for example not wanting to use the boys room with other boys also using it and perhaps watching him. I personally could add more to this discussion but it would be more discreet if you handle it on your own perhaps with a child psychologist and perhaps with some school official.

Disney hints:
http://members.aol.com/ajaynejr/disney.htm

 

[veraletta]

I wonder if it could be just plain old stress. there is a lot of stress at school for kids and not all kids handle it the same way. I would just talk to him about it, but dont ever get up set with him, as believe me, no one just want to wet on them selves.
Just be very supportive to him when he comes home, let him know that your sorry that this happen to him and that you understand how hard this is for him.
My son had accidents at night until he was about 10 years old, but bed wetting ran in his father family, so I wasnt to worried about it.

My son was more upset than I was, I alway told him that some day his bladder will grow big enough to hold thru the night and that he will never have to worry about it happening again.

he is now 23 years old and still say how supportive and understanding, I was about his bed wetting.
I just told him, son believe me, I know that no one just want to pee on themselves. I understand that it had to be hard on him to wake up to that in the morning, its not the best feeling to wake up wet and cold.

I never had a bed wetting problem but my step sister did and I still remember how my step mother and my own father was mean to her, they would spank her and she would be punish for it. I remember how she would beg me to please wake her up in the night so she could go pee, so she wouldnt wet the bed, but me being a kid I some times would forget, but I still remember how it broke my heart in the morning to hear her getting yelled at by my dad or her mother.

 

[Grendalynn]

If DS has more problems at school there could be some underlying psychological problem, for example not wanting to use the boys room with other boys also using it and perhaps watching him. I personally could add more to this discussion but it would be more discreet if you handle it on your own perhaps with a child psychologist and perhaps with some school official.

Disney hints:
http://members.aol.com/ajaynejr/disney.htm

Not worried about the other boys "looking" at him - the primary grades in his school have a bathroom with seperate stalls and a bathroom right in their classroom. He is a very independant and aconfident child. I have no quams about is "psychological" dispostion; that is a total non-issue.

Sounds to me this is just more of a groth and developmental issue than anything else. Glad to hear that I am not alone in the boat! I feel very enlightened to hear (read) of the other similar situations and stories. I can now rest assured! Thanks again - Happy Fall!

 

[tfiga]

My son is 4.5 and we have the same problem...Granted he is younger but the mentality is the same. I have spoke to his doctor and he has no medical problems he is just to interested in whatever he was doing to stop. So basically I ask him every couple of hours to try and if he has an accident, I make him stop whatever he was doing and take a bath..He has since reduced his number of accidents quite a bit since he does not want to have to end the fun for a bath. I tryed rewards and reprimands and that just seemed to make it worse. I think he felt I was to controlling and it lead to fights. Now I do not even comment except to say I am going to start the bath.