4 kids by myself?

[momto4princesses]

My DH works out of town and is constantly traveling. We planned a Disney trip for this month about 6 months ago when he was working 2 hours from home. Well that company had some major issues and he was laid off in November. He is working again but had to go 11 hours from home to do so. He was just home and Christmas and so now he is giving me a hard time about the trip. He doesn't want to A) take time off work and B) drive all the way back plus more so soon.

I'm really bummed. The kids are super excited about the trip and it is paid for so I am not going to cancel it but I keep wondering if I'm crazy and will I be able to keep up with all 4 of them in Disney by myself. I'm pretty used to single parenting since he's out of town so much but this is a whole new ballgame.

My kids are 12, 9, 7, and 2. What do you guys think am I crazy for going it alone?

 

[Jey12]

It depends on the kids. Are the older ones mature enough to be rather self sufficient on the trip? If so it really shouldn't be that bad of a trip. The 2 year old will limit a few of the rides you can go on. If your 12 year old is mature enough to watch the little one you could ride swap and enjoy the bigger rides as well.

Another thought is do you have a friend that would like to tag along? I assume you've already paid for DH and maybe there's someone who could fill in for him, have a great time and help with kid control? I know I would jump on the chance if I could and a friend needed me to help watch their kids at Disney.

 

[tjmw2727]

Totally depends on the kids and on how much you do with the 4 of them as the only adult. Judging from how much your dh travels you probably do take them to the zoo, park etc alone !

I have been taking my 2 dd's as the solo adult since they were 2 and 4 but I realize 4 is very diffrent than two !

The older three are old enough to ride without an "adult" so you can split up for rides the baby can't ride and meet them at the exit. They should be fine riding 3 to a seat on most of the ridees - I rode with my 2 dd's until they were 12ish. I would make sure at least one (if not 2) of the kids have a cellphone in addition to yours. (Even a go phone just for the trip!)

I would go through the day in my mind and try to anticipate any issues - counter serve meals you would definately need the help of the 12yo to stay with the baby at the table while you got food with at least one other child for example.

If the baby will nap in the stroller your all set - if not what will the kids do during nap time? Maybe they can hit the resort arcade or watch a movie and rest themeslves?

The fact that you are considering going leads me to believe that you think it is workable!! I have a feeling you can probably handle it. Won't be a relaxing vacation but you will get good quality time with the kids and without cleaing & cooking

 

[SmallWorld71]

I, too, say it depends on the kids. I have a 12 and almost 9 year old and they would be quite easy at Disney which would allow me to look after the younger ones. They've been before and would be fine on rides by themselves and I know my 12 year old would be able to watch a 2 year old for a while if needed, help with the stroller on the buses, helping carry food at a CS place, getting food for the little one at a buffet etc... We often go places with my 16month old niece and my kids are more like extra baby sitters than extra kids, but not every kid is like that.

I guess it all depends on how mature and independent your older ones are? Will they be able help to you? Are they OK going on rides or sitting on rides alone? Are you OK with this? I see you said you are driving - how are they in the car?

I've traveled with the kids lots of times by myself over the years and I have never found it to be a problem. But, it really depends on the kids. My kids have always been good travelers and are actually much better behaved when we travel then they are at home.

 

[luvmesometigger]

I agree with everyone else. Really depends on the kids. I am going in April with my 3. No hubby. We are meeting a friend with her 2 and no hubby. I know it will be ok for me since my 6 and 11 (he turns 12 while we are there) know the rules and will listen and help me with the 2 year old.

If I had crazy kids, no way I would do it alone.

 

[Macprincess]

I have been in a similar situation when my three kids were a bit younger. They were 5, 4 and 1 at the time. The 5 & 4 year old had a countdown calendar going and were extremely excited about the upcoming trip. The only “Grumpy” in our party was my husband. He is not a huge Disney fan and truth be told in those days preferred to stay at home rather than travel with our children. As the trip got closer he began to complain about the cost, flying from CA to FL with the kids, missed time from work and basically anything he could come up with to try and guilt me into canceling that trip. I sat him down and let him know that this trip was important to the kids and me. (We could afford it so no issue there.) The kids & I we were going with or without him. I honestly think he thought I would cave. I didn’t! Grumpy stayed home.

Yep, I flew alone with the 3 kids, with a change of planes in Atlanta and lived to tell about it. I spent 7 days a WDW alone with my children. It’s a trip I will always cherish.

With kids your children age I would never consider not going. It’s a bummer your husband can’t/ won’t go but why should all of you miss a vacation you have all been looking forward to? I would sit down with your older children and explain before you go that you may be requiring more assistance from them since you’re alone. Explain that the alternative is having to cancel. Faced with the harsh reality of that truth I would imagine the older kids would be willing to help out.

Three things came from my experience of leaving my husband at home. First, it was very eye-opening to my husband that he missed a huge experience in his children’s life. This hit him hard and he has since made certain never to miss family vacation again. He now even gets involved in the planning of our yearly family vacations. He also realized that my needs are important. Something I really had not been as clear about until that point in my marriage and should have done years earlier. I also have now ventured out on many more adventure alone with my children sometimes with a child’s friend or cousins along. I just make sure these are places we have been as a family already so my husband is not missing a 1st. Also, that he is okay with us going without him. If not we wait until he can travel with us.

This past summer I took a road trip alone with 6 kids from FL to Tennessee. The kids’ were ages 13-8. We had an awesome week exploring The Smoky Mountain and Dollywood. I also took my 3 kids alone on a Disney Cruise last March.

I say go for it! I doubt you will regret it but odds are you will resent it if you do skip this trip.

 

[GAGirlInVA]

From one mama of four to another, with that age spread I'd consider it.

 

[MickeyHereWeCome!]

I also have four kids: 14, 11, 8 and 6. Given the ages of your two oldest, I totally think the trip is doable.

As someone else mentioned, my big thing would be to go through each day in my mind to problem solve any issues that might come up.

I would feel very confident that a 12 year old could be a huge help with everything!

I woud be honest with your kids that this trip will be fun, but you have even higher expectations from them. If they can't handle it, you'll head back to the resort!

Good luck! Have fun!

 

[SmallWorld71]

A few tips:
1) If you decide to stay for any of the night time shows (Fantasmic, fireworks etc...) I strongly suggest you stay put when the show is over instead. Even though you will be tempted to just go with the mob if you are exhausted, sitting on a bench for 15 minutes can make a huge difference. It can be hard to maneuver through the crowd with a stroller and even harder to keep track of 4 kids even if they are really good at staying with you. Let the mob go first. You won't get back to your resort much, if any, later.

2) Do your best to prevent meltdowns -
-Find out ahead of time what everyone's top choices are. I always ask my kids for their top 3 must see's/ do's and promise to work those into the schedule. But, they in return promise to trust me that we will see it even if that means passing by a long line and returning later.
-Make sure everyone gets enough sleep.
-Carry some small snacks for when someone needs one. Toddlers in particular seem to be hungry at the most random times and a little snack can avoid a meltdown.
-Make sure to have enough down time - the pool, resort arcade or watching a little TV in the room can refresh everyone.

3) If the older kids will be riding some of the rides without you, make sure they know where/ how to meet you after. Many rides have gift shops which make good meeting spots. My kids have never been questioned when riding without an adult, but some on here have reported that their children have been asked how old they are. Yours are old enough to ride without you, but you may want to let them know that the CM's may ask. Expedition Everest and Rock'n'Roller Coaster only have 2 seats together, but on the other rides with height requirements, they will be able to fit 3 across. Also, use Fast Pass for these times so the time they spend in line, and the time you spend waiting and maybe worrying, will be minimal.

4) Make sure they know what to do if you become separated from one another.

5) Establish a plan for dealing with meal times. Maybe the 12 year old can find a table with the 2 year old while the others help you carry food or something similar.

6) Get most things ready for the park the night before - have the bag packed, have the kids clothes already laid out (some people pack individual outfits in zip lock bags which might help), have breakfast in the room if it is easier than navigating the food court crowds in the am

I think you will be just fine navigating the parks and resorts on your own. The only places I personally would avoid would be the water parks. They are very difficult to navigate if you are the only adult with a range of ages. Your 3 older kids would not find any enjoyment in the kiddie area, but only the 12 year old is old enough to be alone at a water park so you can't really let them go off on their own. And if wouldn't be much fun dragging the 2 year old around to all the water slides. The 2 year old could actually go on most of them, but lugging the double rafts up by yourself is exhausting. And, it would be too hard to keep track of everyone in a lazy river.

Have a great trip!

 

[momto4princesses]

Thanks for all the advice. It is most helpful.

My girls are really pretty good girls. I think if I walked them to the beginning of the line and then waited at the exit/gift shop it would be fine. I think my middle daughter might be more worried about that than even I would be, lol. My two oldest do have cell phones so we'll definitely take those in case something arises they can reach me.

Hadn't thought about the outfits in bags tip but that sounds like it would definitely make things easier in the mornings. As far as eating, we do have reservations for 1 TS each day so the plan is to have that meal and maybe one other meal with the rest of the day being snacks. My 12 year old is used to having to watch baby for a minute while I get plates, or taking the two middle to the bathroom for me, etc. So hopefully we'll be okay.

They travel great. I travel with them by myself to my sister's 8 hours away frequently without problems.

I know it will be a little more stressful than my average trip and we'll have some things we'll have to work out but hopefully the crowds will be low and that will help with our managability with the parks and rides.

I still hate that DH won't come but I'm thinking more and more after gathering your tips that it is perfectly do-able and we'll be fine. Thanks so much.

 

[Darcy03231]

I have four children and have done multiple trips to WDW alone with them (DH hates WDW). While it can require a bit more work and planning, it can be done. My older ones were good about helping with the younger ones and a couple of nights I put the younger two in the kids club so the older two and I could ride the stuff the little ones couldn't go on. A good time was had by all. Each day I made sure we did each child's top ride and counted anything else as a bonus. That way it kept anyone from being disappointed.

 

[HeatherLassell]

Thanks for all the advice. It is most helpful.

My girls are really pretty good girls. I think if I walked them to the beginning of the line and then waited at the exit/gift shop it would be fine. I think my middle daughter might be more worried about that than even I would be, lol. My two oldest do have cell phones so we'll definitely take those in case something arises they can reach me.

Sounds like you'll be just fine! Have a great vacation.

I'm going in September with my 3 kids (14,9,6) and it's just me! I can't wait!

 

[princessmorgan]

As another fellow mom of 4 princesses, I would definitely do it! Especially if you've done Disney before and it can be a somewhat relaxing trip. Even as young as my girls are, I would do it, but I am pretty laid back and have a go with the flow attitude. Your older girls are definitely at an age to be helpful. This trip may just need some extra planning Have fun!

 

[Deb & Bill]

Could it be more about the cost of the trip versus what you said he said? If he was laid off once, could he be worried about being laid off again and that the money for the trip might be helpful to keep the household going?

Just a thought.

 

[Juliet25]

Given the ages of your kids, it's doable. The three oldest are probably pretty self sufficient and could help out with the little one. I think you could manage.

 

[tlh0726]

Did you discuss with your DH about the rest of you going without him?
How will the kids feel to be there without Dad?


My DH has been working in Las Vegas (we live in PA) 3 weeks out of the month since last February.
We are planning a June trip with a friend and her 2 girls.
We have already discussed if his work has him out of town that everyone else will still go, changing to hotel instead of the motorhome.
If it was just our family going, the kids would want daddy there, so we would be rescheduling.

 

[momto4princesses]

The trip is already paid. And he was only laid off from his job for like a week so no I don't think it is a financial thing.

I did talk to him about it and he was fine if we go without him. I think he might even prefer it. He's not really a disney fanatic the way myself and the girls are.

I guess I just needed reassurance that I could handle Disney on my own.

 

[fairestoneofall]

if you had four small children, it might be iffy. but with your three kids a little older, i think you'll be fine.

last summer, my sister and i took my two kids (then 5 and 8). i laid down ground rules and stuck to them. i think i had to give them a warning once or twice, but that was it. their daddy also told them that if either of them gave me trouble, he'd drive down and pick them up.