This is a sad non-Disney related post. Please don't read if you don't want to be sad.
I knew I had some free time this evening and was planning on posting about day 3 but we had some family drama today. Our dog died. I can't find the crying smiley.
She would have been 16 this December. I gave her to my husband for Valentine's Day when she was nine weeks old and she was named Jasmine because Aladdin was our favorite movie when we were dating. Plus the neighbors down the hall at the time had a dog named Belle.
She was diagnosed with congestive heart failure in May. I had a great conversation about it with a nice couple in the waiting room before that diagnosis. I kind of knew what it was because a good friend researched all her symptoms for me. The couple in the waiting room spoke of their dog having the same episode (looked like a heart attack or seizure but vet said was probably just her fighting a faint, I still call it a heart attack especially after today) Jasmine had a few nights before and how their dog responded well to the medication and died about a year later.
During our appointment the vet was optimistic. He prescribed the exact same thing the couple in the waiting room spoke of and said since we brought her in faithfully for her annual visits and he had never noticed a murmur before that meant we caught it early and she should respond well to treatment.
She really did do well for the first few weeks. But then started having trouble breathing again. When I called in they said to up one of the medications to help with the swelling. The vet said that if she were human she would be carting around an oxygen tank with her and the heat was probably giving her a lot of problems. We never left her outside more than a few seconds. She would make a little circle, pee in the middle and head straight to the door.
However the increased medication only seemed to work for a day or two and then she was breathing harder than ever. Last night I knew that I would have to make a decision today. I had already decided that we would take her in. Then she had another heart attack. Her head rolled back, her legs stiffened and she yelped. Just like before. She hadn't barked in months so the yelp was especially heart wrenching.
I woke my husband and he helped me clean her up (yes a mess was made during the episode) and then he tried to hold her and comfort her. She eventually just wanted down. He called in to work today and we called the vet. I didn't want to take her in necessarily. I wanted to do it at home because she has always had a huge fear of going there. She cried literal tears and whimpered while hiding her head under my arm every time. But they said we could come and pick up a sedative and then bring her in later in the evening already sedated.
The only time she perked up all day was when my husband got home with the sedative. I had him get McDonald's for lunch so we wouldn't have to cook and ordered extra nuggets. She had her own six piece that I tore up and fed to her a little at a time. She really loved it but as soon as it was gone she was back to breathing hard and not really noticing anything. We gave the sedative to her and she got worse and worse. The vet thought it might relax her enough to pass on her own. It almost did but she was a spunky little thing and kept fighting what was happening.
I held her all the way to the vet and she started having another attack. When we got there I had my husband take the kids inside to the waiting room. I didn't think she would make it to her appointment. She fought it for 15-20 minutes. Several attacks. Head rolled back and legs stiffening intermittently. I sang to her and told her it was okay. I told her to chase lots of squirrels for us since this body wouldn't be holding her back anymore. Then I remembered when we took her to K9 college as a puppy and how we learned to make her sit and stay and she wasn't to move until we said free. I just kept telling her that she was free and to let go. Finally she did.
I had hoped she would go in my arms. I just wanted it to be more peaceful and at home. I held her for a long time until my husband came out. I had him go back in and see if we could take her in the back. The kids were already distraught and I didn't want them to see her. In hindsight, maybe I should have let them see her. I just know when I was little that would have freaked me out so I chose to take her in discreetly. My husband wanted to carry her in though. He was having a really rough time and I hadn't seen him cry since his father passed away from Leukemia 13 years ago. My daughter doesn't think he cried but I saw him cry when he came out and was petting her while she was fighting and again when he came out to carry her in. He compared it to his father's passing. There's a seizure of some sort and you think it's over but it's not, they start breathing again. Then it happens again, and again and you just pray for it to end.
We are having her cremated. We'll spread her ashes under the tree that she used to love to chase the squirrels up just outside our back door. My husband would have liked to bury her but the dirt around here is more like clay and he didn't think he could make a decent plot.
Coincidentally my father-in-law who passed away 13 years ago loved our dog. His wife wanted her after he passed because she knew how much he loved her. Today would have been his birthday. So Happy Birthday Dad. Please take good care of our dog.
I'm sorry for the sad post but I really wanted to type that all out. Facebook and Twitter 140 character blurbs couldn't do the story justice. I'm glad she's not suffering anymore but I can't stop crying. I thought we would have longer after her diagnosis. We're just heartbroken and there is so much around the house that reminds me of her. Not to mention she always slept on the floor behind me at the computer.
Now I'm going to bury myself reading other people's happy Disney thoughts and try to get back here to post day 3 next week.
Goodbye Princess Jasmine. We'll miss you!
we did the 8 am bfast here in Nov...and didn't make RD...jat
too funny!! Its going to be the best week ever at WDW
) I'm afraid to put any pressure on them with nail clippers.
53 DAYS!!!!!!! 
are they in men/womens clothing or w/ seasonal halloween stuff? they are just starting to put a few things out at our store now...
