14 y/o raped.

[mrsltg]

We often talk about the damage we do to our girls as a society but, imho, it's nothing next to what we've been doing to our boys. This is a case in point. This boy has been failed on so many levels. How sad.

 

[cardaway]

i guess this question should go to men. If you think back from that age til today if a woman that age had been willing and you had acted would you have considered it rape then and now. Would it have mess up your life.

Not only am I a guy, I'm a guy who I guess was "raped" when I was 16. She was 20. I realize it's illegal, but IMO one of the problems with sex offender laws is that they do not separate willing sex from actual rape.

While I agree there are problems with older adults taking advantage of kids, there are also many cases where BOTH people involved were 100% willing and not doing anything different than two adults.

 

[Hercules10]

I'm not saying this is because men enjoy sex more then women. I'm saying that societally the fallout for the two would be much different.

14 y/o boy = "Woo-hoo! You bet I tagged that!"
14 y/o girl = "I'm not a slut, he forced me!"

I would assume a woman who would do this will be disturbed because she's a good looking girl who would have no problem finding men her age to be with.

She was married. "Good looking couple" that the wedding photographer used as his models. But she said their sex life was dismal because she had been raped.

 

[poohandwendy]

this is why i am looking on a man's take on this. I'm wondering if one will be completely honest about it. My sons' are past this age.
Was the woman in a position of authority over the boy. That would make a huge difference to me. That is part of what is disturbing.
I'm not saying she shouldn't be punished. There are laws and they should be enforced. I"m saying that it's possible that my oppinion on this would be different than if it had been a girl involved. I'm not saying this is because men enjoy sex more then women. I'm saying that societally the fallout for the two would be much different. I did not see the interview and have no specific knowledge about this case. I would assume a woman who would do this will be disturbed because she's a good looking girl who would have no problem finding men her age to be with.

The only men who could possibly know how they would feel is those who have been molested. In this case, she was his teacher.

Why do you assume this would be different for a girl? Most of the time, the fallout from society isn't even relevant because the child doesn't tell. The fallout for a boy may even be worse because people think he should have enjoyed it or asked for it. And that he is an idiot if he doesn't see it as a good thing.

 

[mrsltg]

Not only am I a guy, I'm a guy who I guess was "raped" when I was 16. She was 20.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH..... I'm tellin' your mother.......

 

[poohandwendy]

But she said their sex life was dismal because she had been raped.

How kind of her to spread the wealth.

 

[agnes!]

In her own way that woman is a sociopath.
And I'm sure that "Hustler" has already been calling...

agnes!

 

[mommyintn]

The only men who could possibly know how they would feel is those who have been molested. In this case, she was his teacher.

Why do you assume this would be different for a girl? Most of the time, the fallout from society isn't even relevant because the child doesn't tell. The fallout for a boy may even be worse because people think he should have enjoyed it or asked for it. And that he is an idiot if he doesn't see it as a good thing.

I totally agree. We should protect our boys as much as our girls. The boys who have these things happen to them are just as damaged as girls if not more because boys are generally less expressive than girls and as the above poster stated treated poorly if he didn't enjoy it. Boys are encouraged to run around, play the field (sleep around) but girls are to be protected? These boys are future husbands and fathers and are just as special and should be protected just as much. I'm so glad I didn't watch that interview I don't think I could've stomached it

 

[Tiggeroo]

Why do you assume this would be different for a girl?

are you really not going to say that most teenage guys spend at least 40% of their time hoping they can get some? Girls don't. Girls that do generally have issues. I know this isn't going to be popular but it's true. Times have changed, girls are more assertive. But generally girls in a home with caring parents, supervision, etc. are not going around thinking about sex. The boys in the same home are.
Rape is different then willing participant. Teacher/student relationship or ones of power are also. Why are parents so cautious with their dd's around teenage guys? They don't wait til the guy is 25 to start worrying about their dd's around them. I'm not saying that if a teenage couple has sex the guy is the reason. But chances are if the guy doesn't push the issue or start to get physical it won't happen or will progress at a slower pace. Please, don't tell me about this girl or that girl.There are always exceptions. I'm speaking in generalities. My house is full of teenagers and I've seen plenty of assertive girls. It's not the same thing.

 

[momof2inPA]

I can't believe we're letting people that stupid teach our kids. Who gave her a degree, anyway?

I wonder if her probation prohibits her from doing internet porn stuff or posing in nudie mags. I bet she could make some good money at this point.

 

[DawnCt1]

The dads -
Well, most of them were of the mind set..
Hey, if Johnny "did" that, we wouldn't be calling the police, we would be calling the Enquirer - to brag.
They thought high fives, not jail time was in order.

!

I think that the response you mentioned is not an uncommon response among males. I have heard the paraphrase a hundred times since this case broke; "Why couldn't I have had that teacher when I was in school"? There is definately a double standard. DH noted however that the media is missing the real problem; After hearing her speak, how did she ever get to be a teacher?"

 

[cardaway]

As for this being only boys, I don't think so. Plenty of high school girls hitting Greek row looking for college guys every weekend.

 

[RitaZ.]

By this woman.

Anyone see the interview last night?

Now if a 22 y/o man would've had sex with a 14 y/o girl, they would've drawn and quartered him. But she gets house arrest?

Double standard?

Or did they go easy because she would be every 14 y/o boy's dream come true?

She doesn't appear very bright to me.

 

[nuke]

I think she definately has some screws loose. The interview was so weird.

 

[4cruisin]

Matt Lauer was a lot more professional than I would have been. I would have cuffed her off the side of her head when she said "he wanted it and I gave it to him."

Uh, wasn't she supposed to be the adult here?

 

[poohandwendy]

are you really not going to say that most teenage guys spend at least 40% of their time hoping they can get some? Girls don't. Girls that do generally have issues. I know this isn't going to be popular but it's true. Times have changed, girls are more assertive. But generally girls in a home with caring parents, supervision, etc. are not going around thinking about sex. The boys in the same home are.
Rape is different then willing participant. Teacher/student relationship or ones of power are also. Why are parents so cautious with their dd's around teenage guys? They don't wait til the guy is 25 to start worrying about their dd's around them. I'm not saying that if a teenage couple has sex the guy is the reason. But chances are if the guy doesn't push the issue or start to get physical it won't happen or will progress at a slower pace. Please, don't tell me about this girl or that girl.There are always exceptions. I'm speaking in generalities. My house is full of teenagers and I've seen plenty of assertive girls. It's not the same thing.

Boys wanting to 'get some' does not mean that they want to be taken advantage of by an adult. It does not matter what boys are usually thinking of when an adult takes advantage of them. Just because boys want oral sex does not mean they want a man to perform oral sex on them. It's really not any different. Interesting to me that people assume that an attractive woman isn't a molester.

We are not talking about forceable rape, we are talking about molestation. In the vast majority of molestation cases, the victim could be considered willing because they do not say no. They are coerced into the situation by an adult of authority. They often keep the secret for their entire lives. They often lie to protect the adult, the adult often tells them that this is good and that they love them.

We have laws protecting children from being manipulated by adults for a reason.

 

[Hercules10]

Matt Lauer was a lot more professional than I would have been. I would have cuffed her off the side of her head when she said "he wanted it and I gave it to him."

Nah... I would've laughed my tukus off if he would've said right there and then; "I want it! Ya gonna give it to me?"

 

[golfgal]

So tell me, who was wrong in this case? According to many of the posters here this woman should go to jail.


RAPE091506
Last update: September 14, 2006 – 12:20 PM

Boy, 15, arrested in rape of woman delivering newspapers
Brooklyn Park police say they have arrested a 15-year-old boy suspected in the rape and robbery of a woman delivering newspapers a month ago.
Jim Adams, Star Tribune

Brooklyn Park police say they have arrested a 15-year-old boy suspected in the rape and robbery of a woman delivering newspapers a month ago.
The teenager was arrested with the help of people who saw his likeness in publicized pictures taken from a Super-America surveillance camera, police said. The suspect had tried to use the woman's cash card at an ATM in the store.

The woman, in her 30s, was returning to her car after delivering Star Tribune newspapers about 3:15 a.m. on a Sunday morning when a male on a bike confronted her in the 7900 block of Lad Parkway, Capt. Gregory Roehl said at the time. He said the victim didn't know her assailant.

The suspect hit the woman with a wooden stick, sexually assaulted her and took her wallet. Then he drove with her in her car and twice tried to use her cash card at nearby ATMs, police said. Then he returned her to the assault scene and left on a bicycle.

More details were to be released at a news conference this afternoon.

 

[mytwotinks]

So tell me, who was wrong in this case? According to many of the posters here this woman should go to jail.


RAPE091506
Last update: September 14, 2006 – 12:20 PM

Boy, 15, arrested in rape of woman delivering newspapers
Brooklyn Park police say they have arrested a 15-year-old boy suspected in the rape and robbery of a woman delivering newspapers a month ago.
Jim Adams, Star Tribune

Brooklyn Park police say they have arrested a 15-year-old boy suspected in the rape and robbery of a woman delivering newspapers a month ago.
The teenager was arrested with the help of people who saw his likeness in publicized pictures taken from a Super-America surveillance camera, police said. The suspect had tried to use the woman's cash card at an ATM in the store.

The woman, in her 30s, was returning to her car after delivering Star Tribune newspapers about 3:15 a.m. on a Sunday morning when a male on a bike confronted her in the 7900 block of Lad Parkway, Capt. Gregory Roehl said at the time. He said the victim didn't know her assailant.

The suspect hit the woman with a wooden stick, sexually assaulted her and took her wallet. Then he drove with her in her car and twice tried to use her cash card at nearby ATMs, police said. Then he returned her to the assault scene and left on a bicycle.

More details were to be released at a news conference this afternoon.

How can you even compare the two incidents? Where does it say that the 30 yo woman seduced the 15 yo boy?

 

[golfgal]

How can you even compare the two incidents? Where does it say that the 30 yo woman seduced the 15 yo boy?

There have been several post that point blank said that if an "adult" has sex with a teen that it is rape and they should be in jail. I am merely pointing out that it isn't always black and white.

In the op's case, was the boy a willing participant? Yes, he is 14, but the boy in this case is 15 so does that make it ok for the 15 year old because he isn't an adult and can't legally have sex???? They are very comparable.

Again, I think that woman is a total nut case and totally wrong but it still isn't black and white.