13 year olds on their own at local amusement park?

[dotfurio]

Do the parents plan to stay nearby or will they be coming home and going back later? I don't think I'd mind if they were close though not necessarily in the park.

 

[MSLRAC]

I'm with the others, if the park is safe and you trust your daughter and her friends I would allow it.

If you want her to go but still worried, maybe have her check in with a simple text saying "I'm fine" every couple of hours.

I agree with this. DD12 went with her school orchestra to an amusement park 90 minutes away earlier this summer. They went off in groups of 4-6 once they got there. I trust DD and her friends and they had to met up with their chaperones throughout the day and all the girls checked in at various times via text.

The same group is going to Orlando next year to WDW and we're sending her on her own again because it's pretty much the same deal on a larger scale.

 

[spinandmarty]

I know she's only thirteen, but do you trust her to make pretty good decision's, that's what it comes down to... I would have had no trouble letting any of my four kid's being in an amusement park at thirteen... with a group of friends, not by themselves would prob be more comfortable with having them there than at a local park or mall... but I am also a kid that used to take my thirteen year old sister and her friends to an amusement park an hour and a half away from home, stay from open to close, when I was sixteen years old... we all stayed together most of the time... but that was forty some years ago... people say it's worse now I disagree, we just didn't hear bout it then...

 

[Bianca and Bernard]

My 13.5yo daughter has been invited to our "local" (one hour+ away) amusement park on Wednesday. It's her friend's birthday and the parents are treating her and 3 other girls to a day/night at the park.

Tonight I got a text from the birthday girls's mom checking in with me regarding the outing. In part if says "we were thinking of letting them have their independence and dropping them off and then picking them up later... I wanted to be sure you felt comfortable with that. If you are not we totally understand."

I'm very torn about this. This is the first summer that my daughter has really started going places without direct adult supervision. Getting dropped off at the mall or movies, going downtown for lunch at the local teen pizza hang out, getting dropped off at one end of the beach while I sit at the other end enjoying my book ... but all of these places are very close by and I could be there in a flash if anything should happen. I want to say no but I think I may be acting too overprotective. I want to let her go but I worry that they're too young to be on their own all day somewhere where there will likely be groups of teens who are older than them roaming around. Many from the immediate area have season passes and hang out there during the summer (there's a pool and small waterpark).

Also, not sure if the mom's ending of her text that they "totally understand" means that if I say no then she and her DH will stay at the park for the day or that I'd be saying no to my DD going... Of course I wouldn't expect them to change their plan for us but it's a bit unclear. I plan to call her tomorrow and find out what time they would be dropping off and picking up and discuss it a bit. Meanwhile, I wanted to get some feedback from the DIS!

What do you all think?

Depends on the child and the venue. As a 12+ teen, I spent hours at the mall, even taking the bus by myself to go (and I was doing overnight babysitting with babies to earn money for all those trips to the mall, so pretty responsible at that age. I was a latchkey kid in 4th grade.) My oldest went on a church mission trip at 14 to help build houses. My 2nd oldest couldn't be left at the mall by herself until she was 15. I could send my 12 year old son pretty much anywhere; he's shy but can handle situations fairly well.

I never had to check in with my dad, unless I needed a ride or plans changed. My kids have always had to call every hour (or text once that became a thing) to let us know they are ok, or if any plans changed.

 

[indimom]

We live about an hour from Kings Island in Cincinnati, OH. I understand why it gives you pause, this was the age I had only started to give my kids that type of freedom (why does 12 sound sooo young? lol); but yes, I let my 13yo go with friends for a day.

 

[RedAngie]

My wife would never permit it. OTOH, my mom used to drop me off at Six Flags she I was 9 LOL

I still see that quite frequently. Kids that appear under 10 roaming Six Flags on their own. Their parents may or may not be in the park.

I'd drop DDs off at Six Flags Magic Mountain (gasp!!) for the day when they were about 12 and 9. Or let them take the bus to the freak show at Venice Beach. But then again I'm a bad mother.

Older DD was very responsible, so I felt comfortable. But I wouldn't let younger DD do anything without adequate supervision until she was well into her teens.

 

[Klayfish]

Like others said, it would really depend on the kid and the venue. My son is 12 and while he can still be childish...what 12 year old isn't...on the whole he's a smart kid and knows better than to do something really stupid. He also has a cell phone. If the place they were going was safe enough, I'd be fine with it.

My wife would be fine with it too, but would somehow find an "errand" that she miraculously had to do that just "coincidentally" happened to be close to where he was.

 

[QueenIsabella]

I would be interested to know if the parents plan to be nearby. I wouldn't have a problem with my 13yo and a group of friends being on their own, but I would want someone fairly close/available, should some thing come up. My DD13 went to an amusement park for a 7th grade class trip--there were chaperones, but the kids sometimes broke off in smaller groups and went off, telling their adult where they were going.

If the parents are going to be nearby, I would probably just ask my DD to text me now and then, just for my own peace of mind. You can even tell her that it's your problem, it's not that you don't trust her.

 

[Kellykins1218]

No problem with it at all. We dropped our kids off when they were 12. I see my nieces with their friends at our local park & they are 10 and 13.

 

[anniemae]

I would let her go, but I would be a bit nervous LOL. An hour isn't very far. Is there anything to do in the area of the park? Maybe you and DH could go out to dinner, shopping etc. in the area of the park so you would be close if she needed you. She could text you periodically.

 

[brnrss34]

I'd let her go but make sure she had a cell phone. That way if she gets into trouble she can reach you or 911 if needed.

 

[smiths02]

Our local amusement park is a Six Flags with (according to my DH) a reputation for gang activity. It is probably 60 minutes away from us or so.
For a 13 year old, I might be okay if my kid was in a group going around the park by themselves, but I wouldn't be okay if the parents just left them stranded there.

I wasn't dropped off at Disneyland at age 13...now we went off on our own, but an adult was there. It wasn't until high school that it would have been allowed for us to be dropped off.

 

[sharona]

OP here - I spoke to the mom this morning. The parents plan to drive the girls up there and drop them off about 2pm. They are not going to stay in the immediate area the whole time but will head back over to the mall near the park for dinner and a movie and will pick them up about 930pm. I'm mostly ok with that plan and have decided to let my DD go. The mom did offer that if any of the parents weren't comfortable with that, she and her DH would stay in the park the entire time.

Reasons for letting her go (letting go!):

My DD is responsible and on the cautious side most of the time.
I will have her text me throughout the day (although I can probably follow along with their day on Instagram, lol).
The other girls that are going are good kids.
We've been to that park a ton of times and she knows it well.
She'll have her phone (it's practically glued to her hand) and her back up charger pack.
She has earned my trust.

 

[DawnM]

Really depends on the kid. My oldest at 13 would have been more of an issue, my youngest is 12 and I would let him without reservation.

 

[Allison]

I would allow this and have allowed it.

 

[mom2rtk]

13 is about the age we first allowed this. As others have said, it depends a lot on the child and the friends she will be with. Just know that whatever age it is, it will feel a little unnerving. It gets easier.

 

[Aliceacc]

Let's assume that you're comfortable with the park in general, since a number of local kids have season passes. Otherwise, my answer would be a flat no.

I would impose a few rules on my daughter, and suggest them to the other kids:

1. No one is alone. They travel as a group, or as 2 pairs. So if your daughter goes to the ladies room, someone goes with her.
2. She brings a battery pack with her to the park, as do her friends. No chance of a dead phone causing an issue.
3. You're already nervous about this setup. In your shoes, I would be less comfortable with a text than hearing her voice. Anyone can text if they have her phone. So, sure, she can text once in a while. But, say, at lunch and dinner, I would want a fast "I'm fine mom" call. Tell her she's free to make all the helicopter mom jokes at your expense she wants to.

But I would let her go. And give her a bit of spending money for a sweatshirt or something.

 

[xlsm]

I would let my kids (one 11, one turns 13 next Monday). That being said, I'd have been more comfortable with my oldest doing this at around 11, where I'd want my current 11 year old to be with his brother. He's a very serious kid, and very responsible, but he's not quite as independent.

When I was in middle school, starting in 5th grade, we'd have field trips to Silver Dollar City (a local theme park) and be put in groups to go out on our own, with set times to check in or whatever. In 6th grade we'd go to Six Flags in St Louis for choir and band competitions with the same rules.

That was all well before cell phones, and we were lucky if someone in the group had a watch and we didn't have to ask anyone for the time to make meet ups.
My kids' freedom is much more limited than mine was, so if I can give them something like this to let them spread their wings, I do.

 

[sharona]

Thanks all for your input!!!!

 

[Lilacs4Me]

I didn't read through, so sorry if someone already pointed this out -

Don't a lot of schools take their 7th/8th graders on year end trips to Six Flags/Cedar Point/etc-type amusement parks every year? We did it when I was in school, and my kids do it now. We certainly didn't have teachers running after us the whole day, nor parents. We were told to meet back at such and such time, and if we were late, the bus was leaving for the 2 1/2 hour trip from Sandusky to Detroit without us! We made sure to get our butts back to that bus on time!!!

DS went to Six Flags with his class in 8th grade, too, a couple years ago - and same thing. They said that the kids better be back in time because any kid that didn't make the bus would be making a phone call to their parents to come get them (an hours drive) because they were not going to hold up the bus to make sure latecomers got on. (now, I am 100% positive that they WOULD have kept the bus waiting, of course, to make sure all the kids were accounted for, but by 13 years old, it's not a bad idea to instill a little *personal responsibility" fear into a kid from time to time!)

Personally, I would let my kids go and wouldn't have a problem with it as long as the park allows 13 year olds to be there alone. I arm them with $500, $70/month-for-service phones for just such occasions! They aren't being dropped off in the middle of nowhere, they are at an amusement park completely within the reach of any parent if there is an emergency!