theostwalts
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Oct 1, 2004
- Messages
- 2,078
Good mornig everyone!! Hope everyone has a great day. Those tickers keep getting lower and lower 

Ok, here is a joke to brighten the start of a dull Thursday.
A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire herself out as a "handywoman" and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had odd jobs for her to do.
Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch," he said,
"How much will you charge me?"
The blonde quickly responded, "How about $50?"
The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she
would need was in the garage. The man's wife, hearing the
conversation, said to her husband, "Does she realize that our
porch goes all the way around the house?"
He responded, "That's a bit cynical, isn't it?"
The wife replied, "You're right. I guess I'm starting to believe
all those 'dumb blonde' jokes we've been getting by e-mail lately."
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" the husband asked.
"Yes," the blonde replied, "and I had paint leftover, so I gave it two coats.
Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50 and handed it to her.
"And by the way," the blonde added, "it's not a Porch, it's a Lexus".
4 1/2 baths? After cleaning all those bathrooms, I bet I'd be "pooped".
I dont writem I just deliver them
I'm right behind you Brantley. Two girls...9 and 4. I'm already old..so by the time they are dating I will just be propped up in the family room waiting for somoene to tell me when to go to bed.![]()
This is weird. Pretty much every time I post I go to the top of a new page. I know. Who cares? But it's just the kind of strange stuff I notice.
Hi all 'nanaheads.![]()
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Hey!!!!Some phone conversations are meant to be private Lindsey![]()
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but since it was only a few years ago(no comment Woo) I guess I can try to remember what it was like...
1. Fine : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
2. Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
3. Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
4. Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
5. Loud Sigh: This isn't actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)
6. That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
7. Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question or faint. Just say You're welcome.
8. Whatever: Is a women's way of saying **** ***!
9. Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong? " For the woman's response refer to #3.
*Send this to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology.
*Send this to all the women you know to give them a good laugh, cause they know it's true.
I believe you have the exclusive charter membership with all the benefits duly bestowed upon you!!So what is this about Trey's fan club, I wanna be in it.![]()
I am still trying to decide what all I should say to my dds date. I'm sort of thinking about "You know I've been to prison, and I am not afraid to go back!"
What do you think? Too over the top?
I dont know what "ITS" name is but its that dumb mascot for Carnival. I'd love to see Mickey in a fistfight kickin the crep out of him....I wonder if you tube has anything like that....hmmmmm.
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Would that be said with or without shotgun in hand?????![]()
Bill your right. His name was Funship Freddie.
They literally had to grab people to pose with him. No lines like for dcl characters. I had to do it just for the heck of it, he was so creepy looking!!
My grandson made a door sign of him with sharp jagged teeth and horns and such. It disappeared the first day off his door.
I'm sure the staff removed it. they probably had it in crews quarters and had a good laugh at it or threw darts at it!!![]()
Kathy
Still trying to decide that. Maybe I can be cleaning it when he gets there. You know, wiping it down with an oily rag...
1. Fine : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
2. Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
3. Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.
4. Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
5. Loud Sigh: This isn't actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)
6. That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
7. Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question or faint. Just say You're welcome.
8. Whatever: Is a women's way of saying **** ***!
9. Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong? " For the woman's response refer to #3.
*Send this to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology.
*Send this to all the women you know to give them a good laugh, cause they know it's true.