What's the funniest thing a cast member has ever said to you?

[MaterializedHaunt]

I just spent over an hour reading these.... HILARIOUS

Love the JC Jokes... Jungle Cruise YouTube Vid!

Ive seen ALL (i think) this JC youtube video and this top 2!

- MaterializedHaunt

 

[luvmylatte]

Two years ago mother, myself and my 3 children (16,11 and 5) at the time were eating dinner at Chef Mickey. We ordered our drinks and my mom ordered an ice tea. The tea was plain no sugar and when she asked the CM waiter for sugar he said to her " well my dear if YOU stick your pinky in it I'm sure it will be plenty sweet". My children were so grossed out hearing their 70 year old nanny getting hit on. The banter between my mother and this gentleman continued during most of the meal. To this day my children still talk about the meal and yes, it still grosses them out.

 

[hollypoast]

At Saratoga springs, while waiting to check in the manager asked my daughter how many stickers she would like. (he was holding a roll of DVC stickers) She said 5. instead of giving her 5 individual stickers her gave her 5 giant arms legnth of stickers. She giggled with delight! It was pretty funny.

And a great way to start the trip!

 

[sexyravenfan]

We were at AK leaving the park when this older CM goes hey lady! hey lady! to my mom and she looks and he says You need to come over here now please! The look on her face was hilarious as our family walks over and then he starts singing Happy Birthday in this ridiculous opera tone. I guess she forgot she had her button on but he seemed pretty serious.

 

[AlohaAnnie]

We arrived at Beach Club Security house at the entrance in our vehicle. We were scheduled to have dinner at Cape May Cafe. We pulled up, Security Guard was eating dinner, he was chewing his food. Never said a word, didn't smile, we tired to tell him what we were doing there. Looked at us, waved us through - I said wow, usually they check, DH said, He was hungry!

To this day we laugh about it.

If you want to get into the Beach Club without question, make sure it is the Guards dinner time.

 

[GinnerD]

Quite a while ago, (mid 80's) we had a family character breakfast on the Empress Lilly. We were seated at a large round table with a horsheshoe shaped booth. The characters were making their rounds and approached our table close to the time we were finished. I scooted around to the end of the booth just as Pluto was coming up to our table. He sat down on my lap and proceeded to push me backwards to the point that I was actually lying down. The next thing I know, he is "licking" my face with that long red tongue! I looked at him and said "You dirty dog"! I could hear the CM chuckle. He then helped me up and, of course my whole family was hysterically laughing. I turned to get up and there was this little girl in the next booth who had watched the whole encounter. She must have been about 4 or 5. With a most serious face she said to me "Are you ok?" I told her yes, that Pluto was just being super friendly and she was appeased. WDW is always full of surprises!

 

[madcat]

Does Crush in Turtle Talk count as a CM? We still laugh when we think of him asking a little girl who was proabably an older two or young three what Humans like to eat and she responded with her favorite Disney word - Princess!

Crush looked apalled and then said "Could someone let Security they need to escort Snow White out of Germany tonight?"

I think that Crush must get some of the strangest responses from children. And the faces that he makes are priceless!

One night during the question and answer section a little girl asked crush how he went to the bathroom. He looked surprised at the question and went to the side of the rock where only you could see his face and hummed a little, looking straight ahead and then back at the kids sitting in front of him

 

[Darragh]

On the Carousel of Progress, the CM was giving the "welcome/safety" spiel and ended by saying "...for those of you who are seeing this for the first time, enjoy and for those who are returning guests, enjoy your 20 min nap"

BTDT - more than ONCE! One of my favorite places to catch a few ZZZZZZ's!

 

[Walleandeva2011]

Along the lines of crush, monsters inc is also pretty funny.

When we went this week Buddy the purple monster asked a kid in the audience how old he was.

The kid said "5"

Then Buddy asked what he wants to be when he grows up.

The kid replied..."6!"

Buddy: "Dream big kid"

 

[madcat]

You'd be amazed how many CM's are from Ohio. DH wore his Ohio State Block O baseball cap on our WDW in December and EVERYWHERE we went, CM's would randomly yell out, "O-H!" And we'd respond back with, "I-O!" Got to love the Buckeye State, you run into Ohioans everywhere you go. There is a running joke that the OSU Alumni Association can track you down to ask for donations, even if you're stranded on a desert island. Anyway, the CM's all admit that there are a freakish # of Ohio CM's working at WDW, I think it's probably due to the crapola weather that we get, lol.

I often wonder if there are really any people left in Ohio.. my husband is from Ohio, my cousin's husband..Ohio a very good friend's husband is from Ohio (and we are all local girls) aannd we live in South Carolina near hilton head which has become little Ohio

 

[luvmylatte]

Oh, this made me giggle.

Love this! When I read this to my kids they were hysterical.

 

[Missytara]

A couple come to mind; mostly on the water taxi to DTD.

Very late one night, our boat captain Sharon, noticed you could see the crocs snoozing on the golf course near SSR. She cut the speed and coasted over to the shoreline so we could see them, just at the time when the sprinklers were coming around. Guess which side I was sitting. You could hear us laughing all the way to POFQ.

Same trip, another boat captain, Dave, was a big show-off with a wonderful sense of humor. He was coming into the marina at POR, he was turning the water taxi 360 degrees to align to the boat dock. He yells out, turning the wheel wildly, "We are noooooooot going to make it." We roared.

Six people got out of line.

 

[Lumiere Lover]

A few years ago my DH (Roy) and I were joking around with our boat driver quite a bit on the ride from POFQ to DTD. I think we razzed him too much. When we got to DTD, the announcement was "Please take your packages, small children, and Roy. Captain Steve made our entire trip with that one. I will never forget him!

 

[songkat]

When on the boat from EPCOT to DHS the boat driver announced to take Ll you belongings and to take small children by the hand. He then said any children left behind would be taken to Small World where their feet would be stapled to the floor and they would be put to work representing the countries.

We had that happen, too, on the Jungle Cruise - the driver first told us at the end of the ride, "as my parents told me when I was 18, get up, get out, the free ride's over!" She then finished with, "please take your children with you because we don't want them, either. If you leave them, we'll take them over to that ride over there, nail their feet to the floor, and make them learn that song in 80 languages."

 

[AllisonK]

We were at Disney last September to celebrate my parents' 40th anniversary. It was DH, our 2 kids and me, my parents, niece and nephew, and one of my sisters with her 2 kids. My sister made matching shirts that said something on the back about 40 years of Disney and 40 years of marriage and on the front the shirts said who we were. My parents' said "Grandma, Grandpa," mine was Daughter #1, sister was Daughter #2, DH was Son-in-law #1 and the grandkids were Grandkid #1, #2, etc., according to their birth order in the family. My kids are 3 and 5 and there were 6 total kids.

We were waiting to get into 1900 Park Fare for breakfast, when a CM at the GF came over and started counting the grandkids. He read the grandkids' shirts and counted "1,2,3,4,6" (5 was in the bathrrom) and said how nice it was that my parents could count how many years they'd been married but they couldn't count how many grandchildren they have. My dad answered back that he wasn't even sure if he'd really been married 40 years. He was just taking our word for it. The CM really cracked up at that.

That same day, when we got to breakfast, it was with Alice, the Mad Hatter, Mary Poppins, etc. We always go to this breakfast because we love the Mad Hatter. When he got to our table, he noticed the shirts and counted the grandkids. This time #4 was missing and he was with Grandma getting more food.

The Mad Hatter asked where he was and my dad said he was with grandma getting more food. MH asked what Grandma's name was. My dad said "Linda" and then the MH yelled at the top of his lungs across the restaurant "LLLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNDDDDDDDAAAAAA! Get back here! #4 is missing and it's giving me a headache!"

My mom was embarrassed and my sister and I were laughing so hard we were crying. It was by far one of our best Disney moments.

My mom and I were at the Park Faire dinner in January with Cinderella and I was up at the buffet getting food and in the meantime the stepsisters had made their way to our table. So my mom is there alone and Anastasia asked if she was waiting for anyone, so my mom tells her I was at the buffet and she SCREAMS across the restaurant "ALLISONNNNNNNNNNN YOUR MOTHER IS LOOKING FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!" It was PRICELESS. And then they saw my mom's phone background, which was a picture of our cat and they freaked out. "We have a cat! Don't you just love cats?" And the stepmother yelled at them for getting so excited!

Another favorite from that trip. We're on TOT and half of our elevator was a large group of teen boys from South Carolina. They have a brilliant idea to all take their shirts off for the photo. So the ride starts and the three boys in the back row et their shirts off. We stop for a few seconds, start moving again and stop again. All of a sudden, in the dark, we hear a voice over the speaker, "Just a reminder, all hotel guests must keep their clothes on! Thank you!"

 

[MissMouseInTheHouse2]

Love reading all of these! I'm cracking up!

 

[Missytara]

I was entering Epcot on a solo trip. It was, let's say (quoting Marie from Everybody Loves Raymond), it was my ladies' day. Let's just say I brought enough stuff to be prepared for battle that day.

I got to the security desk, placed my bag on the table, and opened my backpack wide enough so the guard could so all the way to the bottom. I was not thrilled about having to pull anything out of my bag that day.

The guard flashes his flashlight, looked in and looked up at me and smiled. Laying on top of my camera, wallet, bottled water, and first aid kit, was a ziplock bag full of product. Right there in full view.

He never batted an eye.

Security guard: You seem surprisingly chipper today, for, well, you know.

Me: I have never had issues in that department.

Security guard: Wow, your husband is lucky, my wife is a bit.. those days.

Me: Actually, I am not married.

Security guard: So, where you from?

I had a magical day that day.

 

[thestevied]

I was entering Epcot on a solo trip. It was, let's say (quoting Marie from Everybody Loves Raymond), it was my ladies' day. Let's just say I brought enough stuff to be prepared for battle that day.

I got to the security desk, placed my bag on the table, and opened my backpack wide enough so the guard could so all the way to the bottom. I was not thrilled about having to pull anything out of my bag that day.

The guard flashes his flashlight, looked in and looked up at me and smiled. Laying on top of my camera, wallet, bottled water, and first aid kit, was a ziplock bag full of PRODUCT. Right there in full view.

He never batted an eye.

Security guard: You seem surprisingly chipper today, for, well, you know.

Me: I have never had issues in that department.

Security guard: Wow, your husband is lucky, my wife is a bit.. those days.

Me: Actually, I am not married.

Security guard: So, where you from?

I had a magical day that day.

Product??!

 

[Lady_Gracey999]

I was entering Epcot on a solo trip. It was, let's say (quoting Marie from Everybody Loves Raymond), it was my ladies' day. Let's just say I brought enough stuff to be prepared for battle that day.

I got to the security desk, placed my bag on the table, and opened my backpack wide enough so the guard could so all the way to the bottom. I was not thrilled about having to pull anything out of my bag that day.

The guard flashes his flashlight, looked in and looked up at me and smiled. Laying on top of my camera, wallet, bottled water, and first aid kit, was a ziplock bag full of product. Right there in full view.

He never batted an eye.

Security guard: You seem surprisingly chipper today, for, well, you know.

Me: I have never had issues in that department.

Security guard: Wow, your husband is lucky, my wife is a bit.. those days.

Me: Actually, I am not married.

Security guard: So, where you from?

I had a magical day that day.

Ain't no feminine problems gonna keep us from Disney nohow!!

 

[ttintagel]

Me: Actually, I am not married.

Security guard: So, where you from?

I had a magical day that day.

HAAAAA! Prince Charming, indeed!