They have apparently already done this - the planning has been very open with everybody being kept in the loop. The only hold-up now is the Groom's parents will not give a number that they want to contribute and the bridal couple won't ask for a specific amount.
Oh I understood that. I still think the groom should discuss this with his parents. Lay the costs n the table and make sure they understand that their contribution is up to them. I would not ask for a set amount either if I was the couple, but if this parents want to participate financially, they must have an amount in mind.
Honestly, I cannot think why they are pussyfooting around the amount. They were not asked, they offered. That's why I think their son should have the conversation, because there must be a reason they are not forthcoming.
We were pretty clear with both of our sons. I had my youngest pay for the flowers, but we paid the rest. They know what we budgeted, and he was responsible for what went over. I also gifted my DDIL with her wedding gown, her mother contributed nothing, so that was her gift from me. We also gave tehm an old fashioned Jack and Jill. More like a couples shower with all the folks who would be invited to a shower included. Lovely with dinner and a band, No tickets sold. No raffles.
For my oldest sons wedding, there was a larger affair, and he had already gotten his wedding money from us. I was also clear what I would not pay for...no Jack and Jill...what they wanted was not what what I would be okay with. I did pay for a nice rehearsal dinner with my family and her visiting relatives included, and my gift to DDIL was renting the B&B for her and her bridal party and family the night before the wedding. The only surprise for DDIL was the B&B, but I was shocked the whole Fam Damily was staying with them to save hotel fees.
In this OP case, if this is how the grooms family communicates in terms of money, it may prove to be very difficult later on. Right now this is about a contribution the family offered but refuses to commit to. What happens later on when important discussions come up? You never know what tomorrow brings, and there may come a time when financial help is necessary, either with the parents or the couple. How do you do that if you cannot even figure out how to talk about an amount you want to offer, after you volunteered? That is why I think the groom needs to have a conversation with his parents. Are theyhaving buyers remorse? DO they need to have a "task" assigned to them? Are they comfortable with percentages? I think they are placing the bridal couple in a tough position, and I cant think why. But I wonder if there is a reason.
