GoofyIsAsGoofyDoes
If it’s still here tomorrow… I may ignore it again
- Joined
- Jan 20, 2007
Chapter 5: Contrition
Part 3: A Moment of Clarity
Contrition
contrition noun \kən-ˈtri-shən\
the state of feeling or showing regret for bad behavior; sincere and complete remorse for sins one has committed. The remorseful person is said to be contrite.
Derived from the Latin contritus: ground or crushed to pieces; bruised, crumbled; worn down or away
i.e. crushed by guilt
Derived from the Latin contritus: ground or crushed to pieces; bruised, crumbled; worn down or away
i.e. crushed by guilt
Whenever I get to thinking it possible that I might be even marginally good at something
Almost anything
Reality (being the harsh task master) generally doesnt wait very long before making it perfectly clear that Im grossly incorrect in my conceit. Usually in a manner that effectively crushes whatever joy I thought I was deriving from said action.
Generally it serves me right and one would think Id have learned this abject lesson by now.
But sadly no.
Ive received far too many of these blows to even attempt to enumerate them. The most recent occurrence brought to my attention the stark reality that I am obviously not wise enough to offer any type of advice, no matter how apparently mundane, to anyone else. Ill be endeavoring to prevent such intrusions in the future, at least within the confines of this narrative. Instead, I will try to do no more than relate what has transpired. If there happen to be lessons one could possibly take from the story, youll find them for yourselves. Obviously I aint the one who should even attempt illuminating what those might be.
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We Choose to Go
(A Bonus Feature in Disguise)
You have been warned!
I left this small blue planet for the first time in late 1972.
From a Disney perspective that is.
The Magic Kingdom was only just into its second year of operation when the fifth graders from the school I was attending at the time descended upon it with ravenous designs of conquest. Admission was $1.25 for most of the kids and the ticket books (yes they still had those at the time) was just shy of five bucks more.
Less than seven bucks total per person.
Just imagine
Granted thats around $37.00 per person in 2014 Georgies, but still only about 40% of the one day charge currently necessitated.
Talk about perspective.
As one might expect for a bunch of ten and eleven year old boys the first place my group sought out after making it down Main Street, was the futuristic confines of Tomorrowland. Wed all been raise during the heady days of the actual Apollo program so this stands to reason. In retrospect, there really wasnt all that much going on in this corner of the park. For a bit more prospective, let me take you on a kind of time traveling journey. Just to get your bearings, heres about what Tomorrowland looks like today
Were this you, youd be standing in the middle of the main walk way looking east toward the Astro Orbiter and the obscured Space Mountain beyond that. Visually, what we have here is almost a cacophony of odd shapes, jagged edges and disjointed imagery. Not every Disney fan approves of this current direction, but I do understand what they were going for. This Buck Rodgers inspired version of Tomorrow land arrived in the mid-1990s and is rather different from the initial vision of this corner of the park
That last image is from somewhere between about 1979 and about 1984 when they finally had everything in the original plan completed. The look is totally different. This is the minimalist vision of the future projected by the styling notions of the 1950s and 60s. Smooth shapes, muted colors, this was futuristic design as defined by those of us that were around during the Space Race. This is the realm of Dave Bowman and the HAL 9000.
Now take one more step back
This is how that same corner of the map appeared when I first arrived in Tomorrowland. Again standing pretty close to the same spot where Stitch and the Laugh Floor now reside. Just beyond you can see pretty quickly that the entirety of the Magic Kingdoms Tomorrowland came to an abrupt end. On the opposite side of those now familiar wooden barriers, construction was still taking place on the foundations where the Astro Orbiter stands today. There were no E Ticket attractions of any kind here. I mean even Space Mountain would not show up for another three years. Nope, the biggest badest thing here consumed only a more modest 75 cent D-Ticket. Specifically, that something was a copy of an original DL attraction known as Flight to the Moon.
Just without the famous and way cool rocket ship that was parked out in front of the pavilion over at the West Coast Park.
As a matter of fact, I think that particular bit of bygone Disneyana and iconic 50s style is so cool that yall should be able to have your own personal reproductions of it. And to that end the Disneys archives are here to help. Presented for you entertainment purposes: your very own cutout, glue-up model of the Disneyland Moon Liner
The instructions that were on the obverse if this one time post card are long gone, but Im sure yall can figure it out if you really want to.
OK, I got side tracked there, so where was I originally headed off to?
Oh yeah, the moon.
As it was seen from the Magic Kingdom at least.
Being as the Apollo missions had already been canceled by this time and the last scheduled Saturn-5 launches were fast approaching, this brand spanking new attraction was already somewhat outdated. Ok, it was a lot outdated. But that didnt mean for one moment that we had any intention of giving up our seats on Flight #92. No sir. Even the simple trick of deflating the seat cushions while simultaneously showing images of a rocket launch was enough to convince a bunch of wide eyed kids that this was both real and plausible. At that moment you could allow yourself to believe that what you were being shown was likely to be a part of your future; that we too would one day leave the planet and explore new frontiers.
Silly us, but we were young.
I still applaud those who continue to work toward that grand notion though. Since their inception, Walts parks have always been part of this ongoing enterprise; celebrating and even attempting to advance the ideas of space exploration. It was the dreamer in him and in most of the rest of us that made it imperative. And I thank him for that vision. For the rest of us terrestrial land dwellers, there is still a chance to experience this classic old attraction today.
Sort of
Well, the general structure of it at least is still intact
Flight became Mission to Mars in 1975; morphed into the somewhat un-Disney ExtraTERRORestrial Alien Encounter in 1995 and then into the less menacing Stitchs Great Escape in 2004. All of these use the same building, queue, preshow area and pair of matching terraced theaters from the original attraction. Only the animatronics, visuals and audio have varied from one to the next. The current incarnation, Stitch, is not my favorite of these to be sure. Its passable if there is no line to speak of and youve got extra time to kill, but personally I feel this corner of The World sorely needs re-Imagineering and has for quite some time. You still get taken for a ride so to speak, but what I miss most here is the notion of being placed into the position of scientist, explorer and adventurer within the Final Frontier.
Or more rather, I would miss it a lot more if they hadnt simply improved on the concept
and moved it to another park.
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We Aint Missing a Thing
This park
Our destination for the last part of the day
Epcot
(Wondering when Id get back around to the actual story, werent you?)
Now rested and all in good spirits, we were looking forward to a leisurely encounter with what was supposed to be a community of tomorrow. Moods were so euphoric that the boys even consented to having their souls stolen by one of our evil electronic imaging devices
Note: I said they consented, not that they overly enjoyed it.
Refusal to even smile for the camera marks another clear moment. The point at which you realize your kids arent anymore. Arent kids that is (heck, theyre barely even yours anymore). They may act like kids at times maybe even most times, but the processes of distancing themselves and nonstop eye rolling have long since set in. Oddly though, these guys would regress and break out of that age appropriate straight jacket on several occasions this evening. Stunned me I assure you. Disney can do that though; distract you to the point where you forget that other people might just be watching. The only problem is that I wish I had better pictures of those moments. I do promise to show you what images I have of them, but dont expect National Geographic quality reproductions. Then again, even poor photos of something rare are worth seeing at least once.
I think
Anyway, by this point the rain had cleared out and there was even a steady breeze attempting with all its might to pushing off at least some of the humidity. It wouldnt really succeed, but it tried. However the sun was approaching the left horizon by now at least the radiant heat would be backing off considerable. Given these conditions, a relatively pleasant evening of exploration seemed in the offing and presented the perfect addition to an already excellent day. And what better way to start that exploration off then by getting ourselves shot off the planet entirely
Mission Space is based on one of the most iconic astronaut and fighter pilot training tools known: the centrifuge.
Basically, its a building containing four of them and each one caries ten four person capsule simulators.
Between the vertical rotation abilities of the capsules and the horizontal and accelerative motion offered by the main device, the physical experience offered up by Space can be
now whats the word that Disney uses to describe it?
Oh yah, intense.
Officially opened in 2003, I first got to experience a bit less than a year later. The sensation from the first launch sequence alone was enough to get me hooked. It is a completely immersive experience, but its also not everyones cup of tea. Something I learned that same day when my son and I convinced his momma to give it a try. She did not enjoy it near as much as Id anticipated. That was another of those moments of stark clarity. Being as unease on her part was never my intention, I focused quickly on that moment as a major error in judgment. Net result: Ive not once since then even attempted to coerce her into trying any ride, attraction or otherwise that shes unsure about. Truth is shes not alone in her assessment of this infernal contraption. For several reasons, in 2006 the folks at Disney decided to shut down two of the centrifuges entirely and offer a simulator only version of the ride. Having been weaned on the real thing, Ive never ridden the Green version of the story, but again I understand why it exists. As for the rest of us, on this day its existence meant that the guys had very little line to wait in for the Orange side of the building. No fast passes needed this night. Thats a win for any quality attraction on any Disney property during a mid-summer evening.
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Terra Firma
The plan for the rest of our time here was to wander around the World Showcase.
Just that simple.
The boys had never really paid the WS much mind during previous trips because well, because theyre boys. All the major thrill rides are in the front of the park. Nuf said. But they now had enough age on them to see a bit of exploration as a positive thing rather than an impediment that was preventing them from experiencing the marquee attractions. Besides, the waits for the rest of the attractions up front were right long and passes particularly scarce (unless you wanted to party all night with Figment that is).
So where to first? To the left I think.
Well start off with a little boat trip through Its a Small Mexico
Or whatever its actually called now.
Honestly, I forget, but in any case, things still arent looking so good there for Donald.
I also think they recently updated some of the content in this one. At least a few of the video scenes and the narration didnt seem as familiar to me as I expected them to be. Of course I could have been hallucinating. Actually, thats very likely, because I distinctly remember that both the boys willing consented to a humiliating hat picture
and Im neigh on to certain that there is no way in hades theyd willingly do that. As you can see the images are a bit fuzzy as well so photoshoping must have occurred without their knowledge or consent. That must be it theres really no other explanation for what I thought I saw.
I just think I saw it happen.
From here we skipped by Norway. I have no specific recollection as to why we passed it by
Maybe the Maelstrom was shut down
Certainly the old Viking Ship climbing structure no longer exists
Whatever it was, on that day, at that time, we passed it by
(so now I have someone else that I have to apologize to).
China though
For some reason, that pavilion just seemed to beckon; especially the temple. The Hall of Prayer for Good Harvest is a one-half scale reproduction of the main structure at the center of Beijings Temple of Heaven complex (天壇 which literally translates to: Altar of Heaven). Disneys folks attempted to recreate the physical details both inside and out. How good a job did they do? Dont know, havent been to the real thing, but what they did do is stunning
That second image is what you get if you stand in the center of the temple directly under the dome. Not only is the view impressive, but the sound in memorable as well. Im told that the space is acoustically perfect. What this means to you is that if you speak while standing there, your voice will be reflected directly back to you in such a way that youll hear your actual voice. You know, that jarring noise that pretends to be our voices and shows up on videos and home movies while everyone elses enunciation sounds just as perfectly normal as at any other time. Its like hearing yourself back through a microphone and P/A system (or, God forbid, a karaoke machine) and its just as confounding.
While youre here you can also check out the Circle Vision film about China. Ive seen it before and it is quite a visual feast, but this time we opted to meander through the exhibit halls instead as we basically had the place to ourselves. There is a sizable collection of art and artifacts within that section of the pavilion, but the unavoidable centerpiece would be the Terracotta Army
or at least, the replica of it. The original collection of figures dates from around 210 BC and was discovered in 1974 by local farmers near Xi'an, in the Shaanxi province. It is part of a vast mausoleum complex built for and in honor of the First Qin Emperor. Compared to this exhibit, the original is considerably larger and obviously far too valuable to be allowed out of the country. But you still get an excellent idea of the scale of the build and the level of detail put into making these individual and unique soldiers
Pretty easy to tell who the stinker is in that picture
Since we still had a few minutes to kill before the next event of the day was scheduled to begin we rummaged around in the retail section of the pavilion. Maybe yall can help me with something we encountered here. In the middle of the shops, there is a sizable statue of the Buddha. Not unexpected for a Chinese themed attraction, but why did other guests leaved coins in the statues upturned left hand and lap?
I suspect its a form of making a wish or seeking good fortune, but its not one Ive ever heard of before in relation to actual Buddhist traditions. I was just wondering if this is something I just didnt know or if its merely an example of us silly American type tourists making up something to suit our own way of seeing things.
Speaking of seeing things
Is that my son (The king of too cool) purposely being silly in front of someone wielding a camera and compounding the affront by not being self-conscious about it?
I must be having some type of out of body experience here. Hed never consent to doing such a thing. Someone might see. It might be time for me to head back outside into the fresh night air and see if I can get my wits back about me. Im not seeing these things clearly at all at the moment.
Next up: Snacking Around the World
(Well theyre not old enough to drink.)