Teens, parties and drinking

[noseybuddy]

Does your teen go to parties at friends houses where the friends bring booze in (hiding it of course) and all drink it? My DD tells me this goes on all the time. She doesn't think there is anything wrong with this, although she said she hasn't attended a party like this yet, but many of her friends have. I just wanted to smack her upside her head. Most of the time the parents of the house don't even know about it, and some of them find out after everyone has left, yet they let their kid bring people over again. I just don't get it.

 

[sha_lyn]

heck I just recently found out that DS attended a halloween party where the parents provided coolers (the drinks, not ice chest)to the teens. I only found out because I saw the pics on myspace.
I am furious about it. DS didn't think it was a big deal either at first. I think he might finally be getting it.

 

[noseybuddy]

So DD asked me if she went to a party and there was drinking, would she be able to stay there all night. Apparently thats what they do. I said heck no. I will pick you up. Not saying that I want her drinking, but if she does, I don't want her staying there.

 

[KC518vette@yahoo.com]

Ok, I admit it, Yes we do! It's kinda fun actually.

 

[KC518vette@yahoo.com]

But what do I know?! lol!

 

[orangekid13]

I'm in college... I'm always walking distance from my dorm... or crawling/stumbling/getting carried distance...
j/k, I don't drink that much, I've only been to a few parties but I do drink and no I'm not 21 quite yet. grades aren't worth the stress of exams unless you can manage to relax somehow on weekends, as long as the relaxing is actually balanced with the studying for exams...
FYI when your daughter gets to college if she does drink she'll have WAAAY more guys making sure nobody takes advantage of her than would think about it; at least if Washington State University is normal

Buy her a nice folding blade knife or a compact pepper spray before she goes to college and you wont have anything to worry about

 

[Vickie46]

oh my goodness.. my little girl is only 5.. but this STRESSES me ...

 

[Acklander]

Do my teens go to parties where booze is snuck in? Probably.While I'm not condoning it, I'm surprised that you're surprised. I think this has been going on for decades. I know we used to do it while in high school. My Dad used to laugh about the time he and friends dumped some vodka into a punch bowl at a sock hop. I've always considered testing boundries and doing stupid things without thinking of the concequences in teenagers as age appropriate behavior.

 

[kristen821]

I did all the time when I was a teenager. I hope my kids don't but you know how that goes! I would make sure your dd knows that you would rather pick her up then her to get into a car with a teen who has been drinking. Just in case it ever happens.

 

[LindsayDunn228]

I've always considered testing boundries and doing stupid things without thinking of the concequences in teenagers as age appropriate behavior.

So what would you think about a teen who refused to drink (21 or not) and chose to abstain from sex until marriage?

 

[PrincessKitty1]

Do my teens go to parties where booze is snuck in? Probably.While I'm not condoning it, I'm surprised that you're surprised. I think this has been going on for decades.

I'm also surprised you're surprised....you never went to parties in high school where drinking was involved?? I graduated in 1974 and there was drinking (and more) at parties then.

It's important for your daughter to know what your values are and what your safety rules are. You don't want her drinking BUT, if she does, you don't want her driving drunk or getting into cars with other kids who are drunk.

 

[LindsayDunn228]

I'm also surprised you're surprised....you never went to parties in high school where drinking was involved?? I graduated in 1974 and there was drinking (and more) at parties then.

I didn't. I graduated in 1996.

 

[Kath2003]

We did this all the time as teenagers (in the UK you can legally drink at 18 anyway). Very few people hid stuff from their folks though. My parents were happy at 15-16 to give me a few alcopops totalling about 4 shots for the entire night. If I drank them fast I'd have been tipsy but I never got really really drunk until I went to college at 18.

99% of teenagers get heinously drunk once. I don't think I know anyone who hasn't "learnt their limits" with alcohol. The question is: do you want your kid to do that while they live at home, or while they're at college?

 

[LindsayDunn228]

99% of teenagers get heinously drunk once. I don't think I know anyone who hasn't "learnt their limits" with alcohol. The question is: do you want your kid to do that while they live at home, or while they're at college?

I really disagree with this. I myself have never been drunk and never took a sip of alcohol until I was 21. There are many people/teens out there who do not do this.

 

[Kath2003]

I really disagree with this. I myself have never been drunk and never took a sip of alcohol until I was 21. There are many people/teens out there who do not do this.

At 22, I have never met anyone like this: even those who are now tee-total I guess they obviously don't go to the same colleges as those who do drink or have drunk in the past.

 

[LindsayDunn228]

At 22, I have never met anyone like this: even those who are now tee-total I guess they obviously don't go to the same colleges as those who do drink or have drunk in the past.

I'm sorry you haven't. Just letting you know there are people like that out there.

 

[MUFFYCAT]

How does this not surprise anyone?
They are teenagers!
I remember my teen years- good and bad,

 

[MushyMushy]

It was really common when I was a kid, although the parents were supplying the booze. Nobody had to sneak it in.

These days, I have to worry about other things -- pot, pills, and hopefully that's it. We've had to keep DS on a pretty tight leash this past year and it's not fun.

 

[MushyMushy]

I really disagree with this. I myself have never been drunk and never took a sip of alcohol until I was 21. There are many people/teens out there who do not do this.

What about your friends?

I was the wild one in my group, but even my friends eventually started experimenting (not at my urging either). I knew a lot of kids who didn't do ANY of this stuff, but it wasn't anyone in my group.

 

[Kath2003]

I'm sorry you haven't. Just letting you know there are people like that out there.

To be honest, what difference does it make? Get really drunk once and you know your limit. It's an educational technique, same as when a toddler touches something hot and learns not to do it again. Drink too much --> feel terrible --> don't do it again.

I'd be MORE worried if someone went off to college having NOT experienced alcohol. At high school their parents are around the corner IF it goes wrong and they've known their friends for years. For the first few weeks of college, you don't really have friends who feel obliged to take care of you. At least back home or well into college you have people you can trust to ensure your safety.