Suddenly Single
- Thread starter mamaloya
- Start date
auntie
<font color=darkorchid>It's a really lovely way to
- Joined
- Jan 7, 2003
You do have a good point. Maybe I will hold off and do it after I am settled and get it to celebrate my success at independence. I do have a friend who kept me from burning all of his clothes. Which turns out is a good thing because he could press charges against me if I had. I still think there is one shirt I may burn, just to blow off some steam. Then I can have a weiny roast.
I'll have him bring the weiny.
Sounds like a plan
..just bury the evidence and make sure there aren't any witnesses. The shirt...I'm talkin' about the shirt..not the weiny......
_________________
Gatordad
<font color=blue>Hates WDW<br><marquee behavior=al
- Joined
- Apr 3, 2007
you are spitting fire, you won't need a match. Don't hate all us men, just me and rog.... the others are ok. Rog and I are evil. bad rog bad pete. oh, and you can hate men in south florida, but not tung po, he's ok, i'm thiking other men down there. oh and not steve, he drinks hot coffee while sitting in front of a fan blowing 80 miles per hour.
oops, almost said post.
jen's husband is nice, he's from south florida. a little geeky, but every group needs a geek, he's ours, he does just fine.
ok, i think you get the picture.....
oh wait, almost hit post again,
i have a cousin who lives in south florida, haven't seen him in years, but you can hate him too.
oops, almost said post.
jen's husband is nice, he's from south florida. a little geeky, but every group needs a geek, he's ours, he does just fine.
ok, i think you get the picture.....
oh wait, almost hit post again,
i have a cousin who lives in south florida, haven't seen him in years, but you can hate him too.
AuburnJen92
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- May 30, 2005
you almost got it right there pete, chris is geeky, (not just a little either) but he is a cajun raised in birmingham, al
i imported him down here...
Sandra, hold your head high. You are doing all the right things and will be better off in the long run for it. Hang on, rough roads are ahead, but you will be in a much better place (mentally) when it is over. You will do fine and will be a better person in the end because of this.
ftwildernessguy
<font color=green>I have a linen closet at home fu
- Joined
- Mar 16, 2003
Wow - sorry to hear the shocking news. We're not all bad, though. I would reinforce what Phyllis said - don't get any permanent marks on yourself until you've had time to chill a while.
big kahuna1
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Sep 18, 2006
That's 82.7 miles per hour.
jrandtysmom
I'm not cool enough for the Tag Fairy...or maybe I
- Joined
- Mar 1, 2008
Wow I can relate. 
I second (or is it 3rd) that you shouldn't get anything permanent until you've had time to think and get settled or otherwise that tattoo will turn into a permanent reminder of just how much you hate him for how your life has turned upside down. I can only tell you to hang in there and it will get better. I know, I know right now you don't think it will because I never did but now my life is so much better - once I got past the anger and then pain of it all. Like Jen said, you will be a much better place eventually and until then - just don't do anything illegal to him.
I second (or is it 3rd) that you shouldn't get anything permanent until you've had time to think and get settled or otherwise that tattoo will turn into a permanent reminder of just how much you hate him for how your life has turned upside down. I can only tell you to hang in there and it will get better. I know, I know right now you don't think it will because I never did but now my life is so much better - once I got past the anger and then pain of it all. Like Jen said, you will be a much better place eventually and until then - just don't do anything illegal to him.
Gatordad
<font color=blue>Hates WDW<br><marquee behavior=al
- Joined
- Apr 3, 2007
big kahuna1
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Sep 18, 2006
Chris's dis name will be cajungeek.
ntsammy5
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Jul 11, 2006
- just don't do anything illegal to him.
No, that might be OK if you're sure you won't get caught!
Gatordad
<font color=blue>Hates WDW<br><marquee behavior=al
- Joined
- Apr 3, 2007
you'd be cooler if you came to our chats.Wow I can relate.
jrandtysmom
I'm not cool enough for the Tag Fairy...or maybe I
- Joined
- Mar 1, 2008
I know I've been slacking!
I registered yesterday for the site. I'll save all of my excuses because I know no one wants to hear them, but I'll try to be cool tonight - if everyone else is gonna be there.
PolynesianPixie
Creating my own fairy tale realit
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2007
disney4dan
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- May 16, 2007
Really sorry to hear about the bad news, wish I could add something useful. Honestly wish you luck and better times.
jrandtysmom
I'm not cool enough for the Tag Fairy...or maybe I
- Joined
- Mar 1, 2008
I was there.....you were not
jrandtysmom
I'm not cool enough for the Tag Fairy...or maybe I
- Joined
- Mar 1, 2008
loveDmouse
Mickey was first
- Joined
- Jan 6, 2006
Sorry for all your trouble mamaloya. Keep your chin up.
Sandra I'm late responding to your thread but I just wanted to say : I'm sicken for you, I know what it's like to devote your life to a husband and family and one day it comes crashing all around you.
I myself have never been in your place and I thank God for that, but my SIL went thru a divorce that almost made her mentally unstable. He cheated on her when she was at home caring and still loving him, he took this " women " on a cruse while they were still married and then came home to her ( SIL ) and divorced her while she was still trying to make things work for her families sake...we all begged her to get her senses about her but she couldn't, he left and took everything...the camper, the boat, the 4-wheelers the spa, two cars and a motorcycle while she sat grieving...left her with a house payment and that was it ( he refinanced the house and paid everything off and left her with the house payment)...we begged and begged for her to do what she could for the kids but she was broken and couldn't get herself to do anything. STUPID !
Lets fast forward past all the horrible and get to today...3 years later, she is a new person, self confident, almost financally straight, just starting to get out there and date and bottom line she and the children are happy.
My advice to you is please do what you can for your children, don't let anyone ever break your spirt. GET what you can for the kids!!!! Don't worry about a relationship with a man right now, when the time is right you will know it and one day the time will be right and there are truely wonderful men out there and there will be another one for you, that I promise. Don't be bitter at all men there are some that have been done just as dirty as you have, keep that in mind, there are good people in both sexes, you are just hurt right now , it will pass, allbeit slowly.
Don't do anything drastic to yourself, for you will regret it, just get yourself and your children in a loving family routine...do not, talk bad about your dh to your kids, as hard as it may be, leave him alone and do not talk bad about your childrens father...in the long run you will see why. Your children need to see you strong, come here to vent! You will make it!!!
And GodSpeed to you in a life your afraid of, but will find that it will be ok, and in the end you will have love, joy and much happiness! Thank God you have a carreer to fall on...money is so much of an issue, cling to your family and your friends and watch out for spies.
Also remember life does not have to be perfect to be wonderful!
I myself have never been in your place and I thank God for that, but my SIL went thru a divorce that almost made her mentally unstable. He cheated on her when she was at home caring and still loving him, he took this " women " on a cruse while they were still married and then came home to her ( SIL ) and divorced her while she was still trying to make things work for her families sake...we all begged her to get her senses about her but she couldn't, he left and took everything...the camper, the boat, the 4-wheelers the spa, two cars and a motorcycle while she sat grieving...left her with a house payment and that was it ( he refinanced the house and paid everything off and left her with the house payment)...we begged and begged for her to do what she could for the kids but she was broken and couldn't get herself to do anything. STUPID !
Lets fast forward past all the horrible and get to today...3 years later, she is a new person, self confident, almost financally straight, just starting to get out there and date and bottom line she and the children are happy.
My advice to you is please do what you can for your children, don't let anyone ever break your spirt. GET what you can for the kids!!!! Don't worry about a relationship with a man right now, when the time is right you will know it and one day the time will be right and there are truely wonderful men out there and there will be another one for you, that I promise. Don't be bitter at all men there are some that have been done just as dirty as you have, keep that in mind, there are good people in both sexes, you are just hurt right now , it will pass, allbeit slowly.
Don't do anything drastic to yourself, for you will regret it, just get yourself and your children in a loving family routine...do not, talk bad about your dh to your kids, as hard as it may be, leave him alone and do not talk bad about your childrens father...in the long run you will see why. Your children need to see you strong, come here to vent! You will make it!!!
And GodSpeed to you in a life your afraid of, but will find that it will be ok, and in the end you will have love, joy and much happiness! Thank God you have a carreer to fall on...money is so much of an issue, cling to your family and your friends and watch out for spies.
Also remember life does not have to be perfect to be wonderful!
mamaloya
<font color=blue>Blows hard and hot and boils us<b
- Joined
- May 28, 2007
OK guys, I was not going to get into it fully here, but things are getting worse. I am still not going to go into too many details because I can't, but I need advice.
My dh did something horrific. He got caught and is going to jail. He currently has 7-8 charges against him and some of the evidence is from me. This is why we are divorcing. He has always been an unbelievably cruel person. His emotional abuse was stifling. He hit me one time years ago and I told him that if he ever hit me again I would take out a full page ad in the time picayune with his pic and destroy his reputation so bad that he would never work in the ministry again. I also told him that no judge would ever give him visitation of his children. He told me that if he really wanted to he could kill me in one blow. He also told me that if I ever left him he would take my children and go to mexico and I would never see them again.
Well, now I have done it. He is going to jail and is having his children taken away. I have been doing OK because I had time to prepare and leave and hide and start a new life elsewhere. Unfortunately I found out last night that they were bringing him back here this week. That has been postponed due to the storm. He was removed from all duties 2 weeks ago and has been under armed guard over there since then. A no contact order (army restraining order) has been issued to keep him away, but that is just a sheet of paper. The CID agent (think NCIS only army) told me that she was trying to keep him over there away from me but they don't want him there. I am trying to get him sent to another post, but they said that since the UCMJ court marshal will be here, he has to be here. They need to give me time to get out. I have not been able to get with all the right agencies with the victim advocacy program to get the army to move me.
To top it off, 1.5 weeks ago, OCS (LA CPS) got wind of it and came by to take my kids away. My neighbor convinced the SW that my kids were not in danger and told her to talk to CID and she stopped, but says she is watching me. This is too much to deal with. I feel like I am in a soap opera or pathetic after school special.
Right now I have several high ranking officers trying to fight for me. They are requesting that I have an armed guard 24/7 upon his return.
The worst part is that I have not even told my kids yet. They know something is up because he has not called in so long. They also know that I have been having a lot of appts and phone calls. I am normally with them 24/7 and take them with me wherever I go, so they are wondering what is up.
How do I tell them that daddy did a bad thing and is going to jail? How do I tell them that they may never see him again? How do I explain to them that if they see him here they have to run home immediately and not talk to him? I can't believe that I made such a poor choice in a husband that my family is now in jeopardy. This is insane. Things like this don't really happen in real life, only in movies.
Gustav does not scary me, my dh does. (d in dh does not stand for dear) My neighbor also has a no contact order against him. The only thing I can see doing right now is passing out flyers to all of my neighbors letting them know that if they see him to call the MPs immediately. I can't leave yet. This is crazy that this storm is hitting just when I am trying to move home back to the NO area. Last time I planned on leaving him, Katrina wiped out our house. I have no choice this time as he is going to jail.
I have been trying to focus on the good part in this. The starting over part. The army is moving me wherever I want to go. The army will take care of me for 6-12 months after the conviction as well. It will give me time to get on my feet. This is what I was focussing on. Now they are bringing him back and I am scared. I am really scared. How could I have ever aligned myself with such a person? How could I have such poor judgement? How could I be so stupid? When this storm passes, I have to tell my kids something. I was waiting until I could keep myself composed before talking to them, but I have no choice. They need to be told now. I am not ready for this. I thought I had time to prepare. I need advice. I have one friend that makes me more panicky and one that is spending too much time focussing on calming me down to give me good advice. What do I do?
My dh did something horrific. He got caught and is going to jail. He currently has 7-8 charges against him and some of the evidence is from me. This is why we are divorcing. He has always been an unbelievably cruel person. His emotional abuse was stifling. He hit me one time years ago and I told him that if he ever hit me again I would take out a full page ad in the time picayune with his pic and destroy his reputation so bad that he would never work in the ministry again. I also told him that no judge would ever give him visitation of his children. He told me that if he really wanted to he could kill me in one blow. He also told me that if I ever left him he would take my children and go to mexico and I would never see them again.
Well, now I have done it. He is going to jail and is having his children taken away. I have been doing OK because I had time to prepare and leave and hide and start a new life elsewhere. Unfortunately I found out last night that they were bringing him back here this week. That has been postponed due to the storm. He was removed from all duties 2 weeks ago and has been under armed guard over there since then. A no contact order (army restraining order) has been issued to keep him away, but that is just a sheet of paper. The CID agent (think NCIS only army) told me that she was trying to keep him over there away from me but they don't want him there. I am trying to get him sent to another post, but they said that since the UCMJ court marshal will be here, he has to be here. They need to give me time to get out. I have not been able to get with all the right agencies with the victim advocacy program to get the army to move me.
To top it off, 1.5 weeks ago, OCS (LA CPS) got wind of it and came by to take my kids away. My neighbor convinced the SW that my kids were not in danger and told her to talk to CID and she stopped, but says she is watching me. This is too much to deal with. I feel like I am in a soap opera or pathetic after school special.
Right now I have several high ranking officers trying to fight for me. They are requesting that I have an armed guard 24/7 upon his return.
The worst part is that I have not even told my kids yet. They know something is up because he has not called in so long. They also know that I have been having a lot of appts and phone calls. I am normally with them 24/7 and take them with me wherever I go, so they are wondering what is up.
How do I tell them that daddy did a bad thing and is going to jail? How do I tell them that they may never see him again? How do I explain to them that if they see him here they have to run home immediately and not talk to him? I can't believe that I made such a poor choice in a husband that my family is now in jeopardy. This is insane. Things like this don't really happen in real life, only in movies.
Gustav does not scary me, my dh does. (d in dh does not stand for dear) My neighbor also has a no contact order against him. The only thing I can see doing right now is passing out flyers to all of my neighbors letting them know that if they see him to call the MPs immediately. I can't leave yet. This is crazy that this storm is hitting just when I am trying to move home back to the NO area. Last time I planned on leaving him, Katrina wiped out our house. I have no choice this time as he is going to jail.
I have been trying to focus on the good part in this. The starting over part. The army is moving me wherever I want to go. The army will take care of me for 6-12 months after the conviction as well. It will give me time to get on my feet. This is what I was focussing on. Now they are bringing him back and I am scared. I am really scared. How could I have ever aligned myself with such a person? How could I have such poor judgement? How could I be so stupid? When this storm passes, I have to tell my kids something. I was waiting until I could keep myself composed before talking to them, but I have no choice. They need to be told now. I am not ready for this. I thought I had time to prepare. I need advice. I have one friend that makes me more panicky and one that is spending too much time focussing on calming me down to give me good advice. What do I do?
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