Spinoff---Parents, Do You Regret Not Having MORE Kids?

[Dawnlight]

No, no regrets. Dh and I wanted 6 or 7 kids, we have 6. The last pregnancy, twins, was traumatic due to complications, and while we considered another after they were born, we later decided against adding another.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

No, we almost stopped at 1. Went ahead & did #2. No regrets, but I think we would be regretting it had we stopped after 1. DW was a lonely, only child. And I think we would have always wondered "what if?".

 

[goofyernmost]

No... we had two girls and that was enough considering our financial ability, etc. One of my daughters, however, had her third child when the youngest previous child was 10 years old. And it was planned. At her birth she had a 12 year old son and a 10 year old girl and then had the baby girl just to throw everything off balance, I guess.

I don't question it, I'm just glad is isn't me.

 

[minkydog]

There was a time when I regretted not having more children. We had fertility issues and got a late start at parenthood (30.) It took us awhile, but we eventually had two more children. The last one (Christian), born when I was 39, is severely mentally handicapped and autistic. Even with all that, I wanted one more child. DH did not. He went ahead with a vas, against my wishes. I was angry with him for a long time after that...

Looking back on it, I think it was probably a good thing we stopped after 3. Life has been hard for us at times, between Christian's disabilities and DH's poor health. As much as I would have loved to have another child, perhaps it was best that we didn't. At this point in my life, I have no desire to raise children.

 

[disykat]

We have two and I think both of us wish we'd had #3 at times. I had my kids at 31 and 33 and when I wasn't pregnant again by 35, it just felt like time to stop thinking about it. I wanted the kids to be really close together in age.

 

[LBIJim]

I don't know if it was planned this way or just happened by chance. Probably the latter. My maternal grandparents had 3 kids in 4 years, including my mother. Then they waited 12 years and had 3 more kids within 4 years. Guess who got to spend the bulk of her teen years caring for younger siblings?

DW was an only child, that's why she wanted two. But we were planning to wait another year or so. Had just bought this house, had just started a new job, then DW announces she's pregnant.

 

[penn19]

I wish we had one more. But I was getting older and we were afraid to chance it. But if I had a guarantee no problems than yea for sure I would have wanted another

 

[robinb]

Nope. I'm 'one and done' and now that my DD is a teen I'm especially glad I don't have any more kids.

 

[nancygirl1]

When we had our oldest DS (I was 30) we considered not having another. But, I grew up alone and it was very lonely, especially holidays so we decided to leave it in God's hands and if we had another we would or not. We ended up having twins (I was 32) and they are 26 months younger than our oldest. After having twins I was done! Never regretted it.

 

[Anesthesia Fine]

No. I would have been okay with a fourth but there were some other considerations.

And honestly, the older they get the nicer it is to be done with the infant and toddler stages.

 

[Aladora]

Yes and no.

When DS was almost a year and a half, right around the time DH and I were thinking about possibly having a second child, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. By the time I had dealt with multiple surgeries and months of chemo, DS was diagnosed as autistic. At that point, with an autistic kindergartener and a 20% chance that my cancer would reoccur within a few years, we decided that adding a second child to our family was not a great idea.

As DS gets older and keeps talking about how he doesn't have a brother or sister, I feel bad that he is always going to be an only child.

But then I remember how horrificy L&D was with my son and I am thrilled I only had one!

 

[firecracker725]

Since we'd only planned on having two and ended up with a "surprise", no.

 

[PollyannaMom]

No. I only have one, mostly for medical reasons. (My doctors didn't say I couldn't, just I probably shouldn't.) But really, it turned out to be right for my personality. I found out that even with just DS and DH, I feel guilty when they both need my time and I have to choose. If I had several children, I'd probably feel that way all the time and be miserable. I'm also very much an introvert - I recharge in the quiet, slow times - and with just the three of us, I can usually find enough of those. And I will say Disney trips are easier.

There have been a few times over the years that DS has wished he always had someone to play with, but there have also been times when he has come home from friends' houses grateful not to have younger siblings "messing things up". We've been open about both the positives and negatives of being an only child with him, and tried to lead him to concentrate on the positives. It also helps that we live near his cousins, so he has those shared memories of family holidays and such with people in his own generation.

 

[Jedana]

No regrets about having 3. A vague twinge every now and then when I see a baby-----until I start remembering the sleeplessness, the whining and crying, the lack of privacy.....and those just from DH!

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

Yes and no.

I had boy/girl twins on the first go. I do wish I could be pregnant and have a baby again, but not so much a 3,4,5 etc...year old again

I don't want any more kids, but I would be welcoming should it happen if that makes sense.

 

[indimom]

Sometimes. We planned for two and had two. Girl and Boy.
What could be more "perfect," we thought.
But as the years have passed, we've both occasionally commented that one or two more would have been nice.
But now we're just over 40,and the kids have nearly flown the coop. We don't regret that.
So, instead of more kids, we have two house dogs.

 

[SLP958]

Absolutely not.

We have 2, a boy and a girl. At times it feels like 2 is a lot!

I love our family of 4.

 

[lauradis]

OH HELL NO....did I mention, OH HELL NO?????!!!!

times a million

 

[cybrkitn]

Yes, I do. DS, who is almost 13, is a only child. DH and I wanted another one closer in age to him. Unfortunately, things didn't go as we had hoped. Certain factors played into it outside of DH and I that we just couldn't. Now we are both in our mid 40's and it still hurts me that we didn't have another one closer in age to DS. If we manage to have one now, we will be in our 60's when that child will be in their teens going into their 20's. Not something I wanted

Don't get me wrong, I love my son very much and am thankful that we have a child. I was just hoping to have at least one more earlier on.

 

[NHdisneylover]

I love my two that I have, but am so very glad not to have more than that. I never wanted DH and I to be outnumbered lol

By the time we are 45 both of ours will be off in college (or otherwise in a more independent situation) and DH and I will be back to able to travel lots just the two of us, etc now that we have some money to do it (unlike when we were broke college kids ourselves). That is on the horizon with the older one heading to college in the fall and even though I know I will miss her terribly, I am also kind of excited for the upcoming new stages of freedom.