Mom asked to leave Applebee's for breastfeeding

[SaraJayne]

There's really not enough information in the article for me to form an opinion about this incident. The law is probably on the nursing mother's side.

HOWEVER, while I think that most nursing mothers probably nurse as discreetly as possible in public (and I'm not talking about hiding under a blanket), not all of them do. My SIL had a baby around the same time that we adopted our son who was a toddler at the time. She joined a breastfeeding support group. One day, when she and I were at the mall with the kids, we met one of the leaders from her group at the mall. SIL had apparently told the group that she was the first in her family to breastfeed. As soon as she introduced me as her SIL (who obviously had an older baby than SIL's), this lady gave me the what-for about not caring about my child's health because I didn't breast-feed him. (She did not know at that time that he was adopted, and not a baby at the time of adoption... but really, did she need to know?)

While we were together, she and SIL needed to feed their babies. This woman made the biggest production of it that I've ever seen -- and exposed herself a lot (much more than necessary, and much more than I've ever seen anyone else do.) She was a self-described "breastfeeding activist" and was basically DARING anybody to comment negatively about what she was doing.

So while I think that *most* women just want to give their children nutrition in the best way they can. There are some who are over-the-top ridiculous about it... and this article makes me wonder if she was one of those.

 

[ellone]

I agree with this.

And at 20 months, my child was eating off the table and very wide variety of food, she wasn't on any type of bottle or even a pacifier, same with my other 2 kids. A 20 month old doesn't need mommy's milk. And who said anything about a 5 year old, why that random number.

Disagree. The WHO recommend mothers breastfeed until 2. Nothing wrong with breastfeeding a 20 month old. In fact I breastfed my older one until 20 months. At that point she decided to self wean.

 

[sam_gordon]

Yes, that is your opinion. Obviously this is not the opinion of the mother of the 20 month old in the article.

Do, I think she has a problem? No, just different ideas about breastfeeding then I have. The child was 20 months old, not 5.

But even if the child IS 5 years old, the mother can breast feed if she wants, right?

 

[Feckless]

Probably because as her 2 year old was running around the table in between "sips" mom was sitting there with her ****s on display. As much as I love my oriental chicken salad, seeing a half naked woman sitting at the table next to me would probably get my attention over my meal.

I'm kidding, sort of. I think there is more to the story and we aren't getting it from the innocent mom who just wanted to feed her hungry toddler.

I don't see anything in the story that even remotely resembles what you are describing.)

 

[monkeybug]

Also, there's medical science. Who needs opinions when there's medical evidence supporting nursing toddlers?

Letting it all hang out? Please even if she was I doubt it was showing more than some people show in certain outfits. I wish they'd cover up or go to the bathroom.

Also clearly a high class place, that Applebee's. Wouldn't want to offend those folks with toddler-feeding. I bet that evil promiscuous nursing mom just wanted to set them up. Yup.

To quote Neil Degrasse Tyson "The great thing about science is it's true whether you believe it or not."

Some of you may have negative opinions about nursing a 2 year old, but the fact is that science is on the side of those moms who continue to nurse.
We have a lot of old fashioned opinions in this society (like wearing no jacket in the cold will make you sick), the fact that they may be popular doesn't make them true though. I'll stick with science.

 

[luvmy3]

I don't see anything in the story that even remotely resembles what you are describing.)

I guess you missed where I said I was kidding and that I think there is more to her story than what we are getting. We don't know what happened. You are ready to condemn him on her word, I'm not and I wonder if his word would condemn her.

 

[sunshinehighway]

Anyone else wonder why these breast feeding mother's would want to patronize a place that doesn't allow them their freedom? I mean, most people boycott, not stage a nationwide lunch at the restaurant. I bet this will be one of Applebee's most profitable days. Way to show them nursing moms!!

Good point! All they are really doing is increasing the lunch crowd.

On another note, I'm pretty sure Oriental is considered racist. I was always taught Oriental describes items (rugs, furniture...),not people.

 

[luvmy3]

Good point! All they are really doing is increasing the lunch crowd.

On another note, I'm pretty sure Oriental is considered racist. I was always taught Oriental describes items (rugs, furniture...),not people.

Applebees will be filled with nursing mothers and teenage boys

 

[Princess Dolly]

To quote Neil Degrasse Tyson "The great thing about science is it's true whether you believe it or not."

Some of you may have negative opinions about nursing a 2 year old, but the fact is that science is on the side of those moms who continue to nurse.
We have a lot of old fashioned opinions in this society (like wearing no jacket in the cold will make you sick), the fact that they may be popular doesn't make them true though. I'll stick with science.

I love that quote from him. Heck, I love him!

Refering to someone as "oriental" is considered racially offensive. And, what does her race have to do with breast feeding?

Yes! Oriental is a way to describe objects not people. And what did it even have to do with the anecdote? Art, you saw a lady breastfeeding.

 

[Heidict]

And at 20 months, my child was eating off the table and very wide variety of food, she wasn't on any type of bottle or even a pacifier, same with my other 2 kids. A 20 month old doesn't need mommy's milk. And who said anything about a 5 year old, why that random number.

So was my DD (eating solids with no bottle or pacifier). As a matter of fact, I only breast feed for 3 months. I'm sure that will get me strung and quartered in some crowds.

However, this mother feels that breastfeeding her 20 month old is exceptable. Whether she does it for nutrition, attention, comfort or whatever. It is certianly not unusual for a 20 month old to still be breastfeeding as opposed to an older child, say a 5 year old. That is why I threw that random number out there.

But even if the child IS 5 years old, the mother can breast feed if she wants, right?

If that is what she wants. Doesn't matter to me one way or the other. I'm not one to sit there and stare while they are doing it. I and probably most others will think it is unusual and strange, but in this day and age it's not unheard of.

 

[mjkacmom]

Should I be offended if people call me Latin? I had no idea using the term Oriental (because they are from the Orient) would offend anyone. Me thinks things are getting a little out of hand...Racist? wow...

As for the breastfeeding, I don't like to form opinins without the other side of the story and there probably is another side of the story.

PSA - this term is no longer PC (had to correct my mother the other day). Asian is now the correct term (Oriental was a PC term when I was growing up, though).

Carry on...

 

[Feckless]

I guess you missed where I said I was kidding and that I think there is more to her story than what we are getting. We don't know what happened. You are ready to condemn him on her word, I'm not and I wonder if his word would condemn her.

You said you were joking, SORT OF. I'm not condemning anyone - I just don't know why a nursing mother would offend anyone.

Anyway, I have no doubt that as in most things there are three versions: his, hers and the truth, and on that we can agree.

 

[luvmy3]

You said you were joking, SORT OF. I'm not condemning anyone - I just don't know why a nursing mother would offend anyone.

Anyway, I have no doubt that as in most things there are three versions: his, hers and the truth, and on that we can agree.

I gave an example of how she could offend someone (which was the joke). And yes, if I was staring at a pair of breasts while eating I'd find it offensive. Watching a mother nurse her baby, or in this case a toddler, not so much.

For all we know she could have been sitting there on display as her toddler was toddling around, going back and forth for sips when he/she was thirsty. Or he/she could have been laying in their mother's arms suckling away and nobody was the wiser. We have no idea what went on in that restaurant except what she says.

 

[Andtototoo]

Applebees will be filled with nursing mothers and teenage boys

Yup. That's what happened when some nursing moms group decided to stage a nurse-in at a local mall. I was working at a nearby college and overheard some boys talking about the "free porn" at the mall because they'd heard that these women were going to be anything but discreet about nursing. They made caravans out there to go and gawk at the women. Who were, indeed, not discreet about nursing. IMO, it was an excuse for exhibitionism.

 

[sunshinehighway]

Yup. That's what happened when some nursing moms group decided to stage a nurse-in at a local mall. I was working at a nearby college and overheard some boys talking about the "free porn" at the mall because they'd heard that these women were going to be anything but discreet about nursing. They made caravans out there to go and gawk at the women. Who were, indeed, not discreet about nursing. IMO, it was an excuse for exhibitionism.

I find it distasteful that they are using their babies to make a statement. There are other ways to get your point across without involving your baby.

Also, these laws are in place to protect their right to breastfeed. I don't like the idea of turning around and using those laws in an extreme way (like exhibitionist breastfeeding) to make a statement.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

That Applebee's did a dumb thing. You don't piss off breastfeeding moms. That's bad mojo.

 

[Princess Dolly]

Yup. That's what happened when some nursing moms group decided to stage a nurse-in at a local mall. I was working at a nearby college and overheard some boys talking about the "free porn" at the mall because they'd heard that these women were going to be anything but discreet about nursing. They made caravans out there to go and gawk at the women. Who were, indeed, not discreet about nursing. IMO, it was an excuse for exhibitionism.

The problem is with the teen boys and not the nursing mothers.

 

[Fly4free]

The manager sounds like an idiot and needs to be demoted to dishwasher. The law doesn't specify what the age cut off limit is, or how much skin is allowed to be exposed when nursing your child. The law, the one the manager was to ignorant to know or adhere to, states that you can nurse your child in public regardless of age.

I would not opt to nurse my child at 20 months for a variety of reasons, but I am well aware that there are plenty of women out there who do. Since when are other people supposed to live up to my expectations and ideas? If they feel it is best for their child, then fine and if they choose to do it in a back booth at Applebees, then have at it! I fail to see how it is hurting anyone. Maybe people need to be a bit more engaged with their table mates instead of staring at other patrons? Maybe people need to grow up and stop sexualizing breast feeding.

I am always amazed at the ignorance of people, telling nursing mothers to go the bathroom to nurse. Seriously? How about you grab your burger and fries and sit in the stall next to me. When you do that, then I will think about feeding my child in there.



Why should she have to? Because it might offend someones delicate sensibilities? Because it was something you chose not to do? What is the age cut off before you are no longer allowed to breastfeed in public?

ITA

 

[sjv919]

This article goes to show how wound up we can be in our society. For crying out loud, it's a ****, not a weapon!

I'm going to go ahead and admit that unless a woman who is breast feeding covers it up, I feel somewhat uncomfortable. However, that's not to say she needs to go to the bathroom to feed her child or that she's required to cover it up, laws allowing. She has just as much right to feed her child in Applebee's as I do to be sitting there eating. As far as I'm concerned, it's my problem if I'm uncomfortable and not hers, since she isn't doing anyone any harm, and I can choose to deal with it like an adult and look away or I can get bent out of shape and make a scene and a fool of myself. That's up to me. But I don't think it's fair to try to tell me I'm wrong for being uncomfortable or otherwise try to belittle that opinion.

I think we just need to learn to mind our own business if we aren't being harmed by something. Just my two cents.

 

[lovemy3girls]

Someone breastfeeding a 2 year old in public is doing it for attention.

She got what she wanted and now she's going back for more.

I take offense to this statement. I have breasfed 5 babies, currently nursing my 10 month old. I nursed 2 of my children past their second birthdays. I nursed in public when I needed to, I did it discreetly and certainly NOT for attention! I was following the reccomendation of the World Health Organization. This is how my toddlers got nutrition, comfort, hydration on hot days, and bonding time with me. I don't understand how nursing is a problem for people. Women show a lot more breast wearing bikinis or low cut shirts. In fact most of the time you wouldn't even know my baby was nursing unless you look closely. I am proud to be a breastfeeding mom. I agree that women should cover up in public and be discreet about it, and I believe in this case the woman was. I saw her interview on TV.