I don't even know what to say.

[eliza61]

I
I know this happens every day, but not at my house and not where I see it. I just felt so bad. How can you send your child to school with no breakfast. Did you truly not have anything you could feed this child to hold her over till lunch? A piece of bread something.

I just felt so bad. I feel for these kids and the teachers who see them everyday. I couldn't do it.

Have you seen the reports on TV about the food banks around the country. They had one on world news report a couple of days ago. The request are up 30%. This was from Pheonix (I believe). We're talking about working middle class families. Here in the Philly area it's just as bad. Yes, some people truly don't have any food in their house.

 

[SorcererDonald16]

Gosh, I think the little girl will survive until lunch. She's hardly "going hungry" if a meal is to be served in, what, 2 or 3 hours? I really don't mean to be insensitive, but good grief, a 5-year-old missed breakfast. Big deal. She'll survive, and maybe even learn to move a little quicker in the morning so it doesn't happen again. She's not going to collapse from starvation. Buck up!

loco, I have to respectfully disagree with you here. I've said before I work in the schools, and you can't underestimate the effect of no food on a child. It can interfere with their learning, cause behavior problems, etc. A lot of research studies out there show not having breakfast has a measurable and significant detrimental effect on that child's learning for the day. So that's anywhere from a half a day to a whole day of school that was largely wasted.

There are children that drag their feet and don't get to school on time for that reason, but there are also those who the parents just aren't concerned with getting them there on time, for whatever reason.

 

[Ephany]

Everyone get free breakfast at my DD's school. You just have to be there before a certain time. If the child misses that time, I know her kindergarten teacher keeps a drawer of breakfast stuff to tide them over until lunch just in case. Some days DD eats breakfast at home, some days at school, some days both when she's really hungry. Once I know she didn't get breakfast at all, she refused to eat at home, so I dropped her off extra early to make sure she ate at school. She waited until I left and then went to the classroom instead of the cafeteria. She just said she wasn't hungry until lunch that day; what can you do?

I hope that poor little girl's teacher is like my DD's and has a little something stashed away just in case.

 

[loco4dis]

loco, I have to respectfully disagree with you here. I've said before I work in the schools, and you can't underestimate the effect of no food on a child. It can interfere with their learning, cause behavior problems, etc. A lot of research studies out there show not having breakfast has a measurable and significant detrimental effect on that child's learning for the day. So that's anywhere from a half a day to a whole day of school that was largely wasted.

There are children that drag their feet and don't get to school on time for that reason, but there are also those who the parents just aren't concerned with getting them there on time, for whatever reason.

I'm a teacher, too. The research talks about chronic hunger, children who rarely or never get breakfast, not a child missing breakfast once or once in awhile. I stand by what I said. This is an over-reaction, and an attempt to cast a child as a victim when there is absolutely no evidence to suggest she is one. She missed breakfast that day. She'll survive, and so will her education.

 

[Liberty Belle]

I see it all the time in our school and, honestly, so much worse than that. Many of our kids only eat when they're at school.

If a child comes in late, though, we always let them eat.

 

[Justanopinion]

I dont mean to go off topic.. it kinda is but isnt. I was just on a field trip with DDs class. They are in 4th grade. When it came time for lunch, one little girl started to cry that she didnt have a lunch. This was the second time this has happened. Her parents never made her a lunch or filled out a note for the cafeteria. A bunch of us parents gave her some of our lunch so she could eat. Now that broke my heart. I just dont know how anyone could send their child to school and not know if they are going to eat.

My son on the other hand... he used to have breakfast at home, and then go to school and get breakfast there... didnt realize it til I got the bill

I know that in our district they make sure everyone has a lunch before they leave on the field trip. Sometimes parents forget or for whatever reason a lunch doesn't get sent from home they get a brown bag lunch from the cafeteria that morning. It may not be as special as one from home, it has a PB & J sandwich with a piece of fruit, and a drink but all kids have a lunch with their name on it before they leave. I think they have to do this for the free lunch kids who can't bring one from home.

And a little off topic, why is there a sticker on the backpack for eveyrone to see-- I guess the OP's environment is NOT 100% poverty free lunch. I think broadcasting to world that you get free lunch via a sticker is not the most discreet approach.

The sticker on the backpack does not mean free breakfast, any child needing to eat breakfast gets one. On the few occassions my DD has eaten breakfast at school that I have to pay for she still needs the sticker. The sticker just tells the hall monitor teachers that the child needs to go to the cafeteria instead of going to class.



Well, I read a lot of your responses earlier today and decided to do something. I called the principal and discussed it with him. He said that it shouldn't have happened. The staff should have taken her personally to the cafeteria. Yes, they close up breakfast but that there should have been something still left out that they could have fed the child. He asked for the child's name, I was able to give that to him. He promised to investigate exactly what happened this morning and speak to his staff. That makes me feel much better.

 

[Suzie Zoo]

Gosh, I think the little girl will survive until lunch. She's hardly "going hungry" if a meal is to be served in, what, 2 or 3 hours? I really don't mean to be insensitive, but good grief, a 5-year-old missed breakfast. Big deal. She'll survive, and maybe even learn to move a little quicker in the morning so it doesn't happen again. She's not going to collapse from starvation. Buck up!

While I think it was wrong that nobody at the school offered her something, I agree with this. She had the "breakfast" sticker on her bag, so like someone else said... obviously the mom cares.

I don't think I've eaten breakfast in thirty years! I know my mom used to try anything and everything to get me to eat, but I would have none of it.

 

[SorcererDonald16]

Well, I read a lot of your responses earlier today and decided to do something. I called the principal and discussed it with him. He said that it shouldn't have happened. The staff should have taken her personally to the cafeteria. Yes, they close up breakfast but that there should have been something still left out that they could have fed the child. He asked for the child's name, I was able to give that to him. He promised to investigate exactly what happened this morning and speak to his staff. That makes me feel much better.

Good for you! I don't think there's any excuse for what happened. In the schools I've been in, if something like this happens, someone just goes in the cafeteria and gets a pre-packaged container of cereal and some milk or juice for the child. Just doesn't make sense to me not to do this. It's not like the cafeteria is all locked up and inaccessible, because most likely the staff should be in there anyway getting ready for lunch later in the day.

loco, I just don't think a child should be forced even once to be hungry until lunch due to no breakfast. I'm aware of the long term research, but there is also research on how skipping it one day affects that child for that day. My attitude is why waste a single day of learning when the problem can easily be solved. I've seen for myself typically well behaving kids that miss breakfast one single morning and their behavior goes in the tank. My grad school was and my field is very much focused on advocacy though. The "no breakfast, even if it's a one time occurence" issue is something we talked about repeatedly in my program. One of my primary purposes in the schools isn't to teach students (because I'm not a teacher), but to help ensure that the right conditions are there for them to learn every day. So taking note of things like this and trying to get it addressed, no matter how minor, is seen as part of my job. Just a different perspective.

 

[Cindy B]

I see it all the time in our school and, honestly, so much worse than that. Many of our kids only eat when they're at school.

If a child comes in late, though, we always let them eat.

Yep, I hear you. I've seen my kids only eat at school too. My most horrifying stories involve roaches in children's feeding tubes! You haven't lived until you have seen that kind of situation. That is a severe problem.. one breakfast from one school isn't that kind of poverty.


And speaking of cockroachers , there were some in my room today.. isn't that special? I guess it's better than the mice in the other part of the hallway

 

[arielsleepingbeauty]

loco, I have to respectfully disagree with you here. I've said before I work in the schools, and you can't underestimate the effect of no food on a child. It can interfere with their learning, cause behavior problems, etc. A lot of research studies out there show not having breakfast has a measurable and significant detrimental effect on that child's learning for the day. So that's anywhere from a half a day to a whole day of school that was largely wasted.

There are children that drag their feet and don't get to school on time for that reason, but there are also those who the parents just aren't concerned with getting them there on time, for whatever reason.

My 8 year old hates to eat breakfast. She is not a morning person and I have learned that no matter what i do she isn't going to eat breakfast. I am ready and willing to make anything (within reason). If she chooses not to eat then that's her loss. She is old enough to know if she is hungry or not. Because her lunch is at 12:45 she does get a snack mid morning. She likes to pack her own snack and lunch. I of course monitor to make sure that it's a decent lunch. Most days when I unpack her lunch box, most of it is still there. Honestly i don't understand it. She loves her PM dinner though. She eats like a horse. I guess it lasts all night and gets her through the next day.
I thought it would affect her learning, however she is and has been a straight A student. She is a go go go girl, full of energy. I don't get it, but that's how her body works. My 7 year old isn't a big breakfast eater either, but she will all her lunch and snack.

 

[MeghansMommy]

Yep, I hear you. I've seen my kids only eat at school too. My most horrifying stories involve roaches in children's feeding tubes! You haven't lived until you have seen that kind of situation. That is a severe problem.. one breakfast from one school isn't that kind of poverty.

Oh my gosh, is that not considered child abuse? Did I read this right?

Oh, that poor child.

 

[Tiggerlover91]

I think her mother didn't want to be "bothered".

 

[raysnkaysmom]

I read the first pages of responses.....

It's sad that the mom had that attitude..if she was already late and her daughter was hungry, she shoulda been a little later and fed her.. she had to KNOW the cafeteria was closed if they were already late for class....

On the other hand tho...my kids rarely ever eat breakfast... they just aren't morning eaters...they hold out til lunch... Hopefully this kid was like that where it didn't phase her... but moms attitude was crappy...

 

[Cindy B]

Oh my gosh, is that not considered child abuse? Did I read this right?

Oh, that poor child.

Yep roaches in feeding tubes. If you live on the streets are are homeless, living in a shelter or a car... it is what it is.

I'm in one of the most dangerous (and poor) cities in the US. Sure, I can get the nurse and the nurse can call Family Services, but if the child is transient, there isn't much they can do except clean them up and hope it doens't happen again.

Refer to the nurse and let him or her handle it. There really isn't much I can do.

So, after you see something like that, one suburban otherwise healthy child skipping one breakfast seems minor in comparison.

That is just one story...there are tons more.

 

[LovinPooh]

Yep roaches in feeding tubes. If you live on the streets are are homeless, living in a shelter or a car... it is what it is.

I'm in one of the most dangerous (and poor) cities in the US. Sure, I can get the nurse and the nurse can call Family Services, but if the child is transient, there isn't much they can do except clean them up and hope it doens't happen again.

Refer to the nurse and let him or her handle it. There really isn't much I can do.

So, after you see something like that, one suburban otherwise healthy child skipping one breakfast seems minor in comparison.

That is just one story...there are tons more.

OMG
If only my children realized just how lucky they are....

 

[MickeySP]

Gosh, I think the little girl will survive until lunch. She's hardly "going hungry" if a meal is to be served in, what, 2 or 3 hours? I really don't mean to be insensitive, but good grief, a 5-year-old missed breakfast. Big deal. She'll survive, and maybe even learn to move a little quicker in the morning so it doesn't happen again. She's not going to collapse from starvation. Buck up!

Are you so sure it is only breakfast? When did she last eat, dinner at 5pm, so now she goes 17 hours without eating if lunch is noon? When was the last time you as an adult went 17 hours w/o eating?

I don't assume she will collapse from starvation but she is 5 not 50!!!

So if she doesn't move fast enough - no food. What next? I guess I have more compassion for a 5 yo.

As far as losing Fed Funds - a bit of a stretch. Federal Auditors would have to be on scene and witness the event. I deal with them on a regular basis and believe me they would not lose funding for a few out of time line snacks a year.

And yes I agree I would have given her my lunch/snack/ without a hesitation. Now if Mom refused and explained it tantrum not financial, I would defer to her wishes.

 

[disneyjunkie]

Yep roaches in feeding tubes. If you live on the streets are are homeless, living in a shelter or a car... it is what it is.

I'm in one of the most dangerous (and poor) cities in the US. Sure, I can get the nurse and the nurse can call Family Services, but if the child is transient, there isn't much they can do except clean them up and hope it doens't happen again.

Refer to the nurse and let him or her handle it. There really isn't much I can do.

So, after you see something like that, one suburban otherwise healthy child skipping one breakfast seems minor in comparison.

That is just one story...there are tons more.

Are you mandated reporter? I am and I'm required to call ACS if I SUSPECT child abuse or neglect. If I don't, I run the risk of having ACS and NYPD knocking on my door if something happens to the child.

Everyone in our building from teachers to custodians are mandated reporters.

Roaches in a feeding tube deserve a call ASAP.

Cindy, do you have any positive stories about the children and families you work with?

 

[cruellababy]

OP- Thanks for being so caring! It would have broken my heart too; I can say that my DS7 99% of the time eats breakfast @ home; but just yesterday am he wasn't hungry here; so I sent in a note for his teacher to let him buy breakfast- the reason for the note- he needs a note now; as I was sending in $20 for his school lunches every 2 weeks; and even after eating a big breakfast @ home- he was going to school and eating again! And I would get these notes that my child's lunch acct was low? Well, it was because he was double dipping- he likes their cinnamon/brown sugar pop tarts And I don't buy pop tarts-well, I had to give him an A for effort! But, now he needs a note.

 

[Cindy B]

Are you mandated reporter? I am and I'm required to call ACS if I SUSPECT child abuse or neglect. If I don't, I run the risk of having ACS and NYPD knocking on my door if something happens to the child.

Everyone in our building from teachers to custodians are mandated reporters.

Roaches in a feeding tube deserve a call ASAP.

Cindy, do you have any positive stories about the children and families you work with?

I've been told to refer and let the nurse report. She knows the forms and the process. I do what I am told to do via the principal and building rep.

Here's a positive. Only three people got in fistfights today. Not one of my kids had detention. (HUGE step.) My kids also wrote beautiful Thanksgiving cards to their families. One even thanked his foster family for taking him in when he had nothing!

 

[mhsjax]

Gosh, I think the little girl will survive until lunch. She's hardly "going hungry" if a meal is to be served in, what, 2 or 3 hours? I really don't mean to be insensitive, but good grief, a 5-year-old missed breakfast. Big deal. She'll survive, and maybe even learn to move a little quicker in the morning so it doesn't happen again. She's not going to collapse from starvation. Buck up!

I do agree in part with what you are saying, but I believe that the OP said that the mother was in her PJ's, so maybe the mom should get her little butt in gear and get the child sooner. If I am wrong about the mother, then that could have been the problem.