Did your maternity ward utilize a nursery?

[mjkacmom]

The baby-friendly approach is based on a considerable amount of research, it's not about "hating new moms" or saving money. Keeping mothers and babies together is just one part of it, but it's an important part. The baby-friendly hospitals I am aware of (in Ontario, Canada) do have options for special situations where the mother isn't able to care for her baby because of birth complications or exhaustion or other issues. But for normal situations, mothers and babies are kept together.

When I had my first baby - a LONG time ago - the rule was that babies stayed in the nursery and only came out for feedings. And they kept us in the hospital for five days. I was absolutely miserable - I wanted my baby with me! I would go and stand by the nursery window looking at him and crying, and the nurses would come out and tell me I had to go back to my room. It was awful. On day three, my doctor signed me out so I could take my baby home. With my next three, I had the babies in hospital but was home within three or four hours. I sure hope we never go back to that situation.

I think extremes on either end aren't the way. I could have had my babies with me 24/7, or not. I would have loved to stay 5 nights at the hospital with my twins, knowing how hard things were going to be at home.

 

[3DisneyFanz]

The hospital our son was born in had a nursery and that may well have saved his life. My wife had a c-section so the nurses didn't really push much about keeping him in the room but on night 2 he started struggling breathing and the nurses noticed it got him on oxygen and took him to the NICU. Had he been in our room and we had been asleep who knows what would have happened. I'm very grateful for the nursery and the nurses at the hospital we chose.

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

When I had my twins we had a NICU, regular nursery, and the option to keep the baby "in-room". It was a lifesaver for me. I sent DD to the nursery when I went to visit DS in the NICU and when my husband was at work during the day if I needed to rest or shower (He saved his time off for when we came home). I felt a little guilty at the time for not keeping her all of time (along with not having my son in-room at all) but now I am really glad I took those small little moments of rest. I sure needed it when we got home!

 

[PollyannaMom]

The baby-friendly approach is based on a considerable amount of research, it's not about "hating new moms" or saving money.

I don't think it's about "hating" new moms, but I do think it tends to put pressure on them to do everything "perfectly," even at the expense of their own health. Children need good moms, but they don't need perfect ones. I clearly remember my doctor telling me "You are my patient, not the baby." He convinced me to trust the pediatric staff with DS so we could both go home healthy.

 

[JennaDeeDooDah]

But for the non nursery hospitals: what happens if the mom has complications and cant take care of the baby?



Or if the bio mom is putting baby up for adoption?
Where are they putting the baby?

I was wondering about the adoption thing, too.


The hospital where I had my daughter had a nursery and I loved it. They actually had a policy in place that if unless you or your husband was going to be awake, the baby needed to be in the nursery. No sleeping in the room with the baby in there. When you wanted to go to sleep, you just called the nursery and told them and they sent someone up to take your baby to the nursery. You let then know ahead of time if you wanted them to wake you when it was time to feed the baby or if you were okay with the nursery just giving the baby a bottle. I opted to have them bring her to me when it was time for her to eat, but I thought it was pretty neat that you did have the option of sleeping, since goodness knows there won't be much of that going on when you head home.

 

[cayennews]

The hospital I had my son at did have a nursery, but you could only use it if they had someone available to staff it. It was not staffed if they were having a busy night. I had my son go to the nursery the first night because I had an unplanned c-section and was still out of it and in pain. I was going to have him go the second night too, but there was no one available to staff it, so he stayed with me for the rest of our hospital stay. Everyone told me to take advantage of the nursery, but it seemed to be frowned upon for using it by the staff. I still feel guilty to this day for using it the first night. It is the only night since he's been born that I have not been there for him.

 

[Planogirl]

LOL, did you stop reading after that sentence? Read the rest, I was being sarcastic.
You know, one of those..when *I* have kids, I'll never do_____.
And then you have kids and you realize how ridiculous your thinking had been.

I took it a different way. I thought that you were judging mothers even yourself.

Sorry for the misread. I know what you mean when you say when you have kids that you'll never do "fill in the blank".

 

[star72232]

I'm not sure if the hospital I delivered DD in had a nursery - I got there at 6am and left before noon (she was born just before 8am and I stayed the minimum 3.5 hours after she was born). Midwife delivery, Ontario (Canada) hospital. Midwives come to the house the day after the birth, then every other day for a week. I felt I had plenty of care.

All 3 of my boys were born at home (with midwives). No nursery option.

 

[gwynne]

The hospital I had my son at did have a nursery, but you could only use it if they had someone available to staff it. It was not staffed if they were having a busy night. I had my son go to the nursery the first night because I had an unplanned c-section and was still out of it and in pain. I was going to have him go the second night too, but there was no one available to staff it, so he stayed with me for the rest of our hospital stay. Everyone told me to take advantage of the nursery, but it seemed to be frowned upon for using it by the staff. I still feel guilty to this day for using it the first night. It is the only night since he's been born that I have not been there for him.

@cayennews You realized you needed some rest and recuperation time. Your baby was safe and cared for by the nurses in the nursery. I hope you are able to give yourself some grace and realize you did just what you needed to do. You were there for your baby that night by making sure both of you got some rest. Please don't give this a second thought. You did the right thing.

 

[CdnCarrie]

None in the two hospitals here that have a maternity ward have nurseries. The nurses would take the baby to the nurses' station if you wanted a quick shower but that's it.

 

[Allons-y!]

Take the baby into the bathroom with you to shower, or not. What do you do at home to shower or use the toilet with a new baby at home? There is no reason why you can't leave the baby in the bassinette for a few minutes while you take care of business. A chaperone is not necessary. If you aren't physically able to get up alone then an aide or nurse is there to help.

You can't compare a busy hospital to your own home. I would not have felt comfortable leaving my baby alone in the unlocked hospital room while I was in the bathroom. And I don't know about the hospital you delivered at, but there was no way to bring the bassinet into the bathroom with me - that thing was huge!

 

[shoney]

My first was born in 1999 and the hospital did have a nursery. The baby was taken there every night and during normal visiting hours. They would bring the baby back for night feedings if you wanted them to.
Second child was born in 2001 was taken to the NICU, so I honestly don't know.

 

[Squishypig]

I delivered both my kids at the same hospital, the first in 2010 and the second a couple of months ago. With my first they had room in but they took her to the nursery for tests during the night she would be gone an hour or two at the time. I stayed two nights, my MIL stayed one night and my mom stay another night but they both just slept, they didn't help once. I struggled with breastfeeding so she cried most of the time which stressed me out. I was EXHAUSTED when I went home.

With my second, no nursery, she stayed with me the entire time. They did all the tests and shots in room. Nobody stayed with me the two nights I was there, I worried less about breastfeeding and accepted formula, I slept with her in my arms (sitting up at an incline), left her in the room alone when I needed to use the bathroom (although I wheeled her in there when I took a shower), my husband wasn't even there that much since he was home taking care of our older kid and the pets. Having a baby and taking care of her wasn't tiring to me, it was all the people interrupting me and "helping" that did it. I was SOOOOO much more well rested going home with her even though there was no nursery to send her to. My only complaint was that they would give me one bottle at a time so I would have to page a nurse when she needed to feed. They also didn't have pacifiers (they gave them with my first) but I just happened to pack one so I didn't care.

However I know that my experience doesn't speak to everyone's experience. For me, not having a nursery wasn't a big deal but I can see where it would be for other moms. I was like the previous poster's roommate, I would have been fine going home hours after the birth and jumping right into chores. I felt great after having my kids.

 

[Squishypig]

You can't compare a busy hospital to your own home. I would not have felt comfortable leaving my baby alone in the unlocked hospital room while I was in the bathroom. And I don't know about the hospital you delivered at, but there was no way to bring the bassinet into the bathroom with me - that thing was huge!

My hospital used those baby lojack alarms, visitors had to sign in and be verified and buzzed through at least two sets of doors, and overnight guests were limited to one person. Those alarms were sensitive too, if the babies were walked too close to the doors they went off and I heard them going off a few times each night. The couple of times my husband took the baby for a spin on the floor a nurse stopped him and verified that his bracelet matched the baby's. So I felt comfortable that things were secure enough that the baby was fine to leave her for a couple of minutes so I could pee. And the bassinet was about the size of a wheelchair so because the bathroom was wheelchair accessible, the bassinet fit in there just fine.

I get that not everyone would be as comfortable as I was but since I was, not having a nursery or someone else there with me the entire time wasn't a big deal.

ETA: The nurses also carried phones that I would call if I needed anything and they were there within minutes with every non-emergency request I had. I know if there had been an actual emergency, they would have been there even faster. So I still didn't worry about leaving her alone for a couple of minutes even for a medical reason.

 

[srferson]

If they are in your room then you wouldn't be able to go to the bathroom or get a shower unless someone was in the room with you.

I was going to ask if you really can't leave the baby in a bassinet long enough to visit the bathroom (a shower, I get) but then Allons-y! posted.

You can't compare a busy hospital to your own home. I would not have felt comfortable leaving my baby alone in the unlocked hospital room while I was in the bathroom.

And that made it make a little more sense to me.

Babies are not quiet sleepers, and even with my last babies (4 and 5), it took a while in the beginning to determine if baby was just fussing during sleep, or getting hungry. That is the main reason why I didn't have my babies sleep in my room, or use monitors at night. New moms jump at the smallest peep.

This makes perfect sense to me once you pointed it out. Sleeping does not always equal quiet and still.

The hospital our son was born in had a nursery and that may well have saved his life. My wife had a c-section so the nurses didn't really push much about keeping him in the room but on night 2 he started struggling breathing and the nurses noticed it got him on oxygen and took him to the NICU.

That one makes sense too. I guess if I had a baby I'd be more comfortable if someone was keeping an eye on her (or him... or them) for the first couple days to make sure that little body seemed to be "running smoothly."

Thanks for sharing. Not having had that experience, those things didn't really come to mind.

 

[shoney]

I delivered both my kids at the same hospital, the first in 2010 and the second a couple of months ago. With my first they had room in but they took her to the nursery for tests during the night she would be gone an hour or two at the time. I stayed two nights, my MIL stayed one night and my mom stay another night but they both just slept, they didn't help once. I struggled with breastfeeding so she cried most of the time which stressed me out. I was EXHAUSTED when I went home.

With my second, no nursery, she stayed with me the entire time. They did all the tests and shots in room. Nobody stayed with me the two nights I was there, I worried less about breastfeeding and accepted formula, I slept with her in my arms (sitting up at an incline), left her in the room alone when I needed to use the bathroom (although I wheeled her in there when I took a shower), my husband wasn't even there that much since he was home taking care of our older kid and the pets. Having a baby and taking care of her wasn't tiring to me, it was all the people interrupting me and "helping" that did it. I was SOOOOO much more well rested going home with her even though there was no nursery to send her to. My only complaint was that they would give me one bottle at a time so I would have to page a nurse when she needed to feed. They also didn't have pacifiers (they gave them with my first) but I just happened to pack one so I didn't care.

However I know that my experience doesn't speak to everyone's experience. For me, not having a nursery wasn't a big deal but I can see where it would be for other moms. I was like the previous poster's roommate, I would have been fine going home hours after the birth and jumping right into chores. I felt great after having my kids.

Back in 1999, you weren't allowed to sleep if the baby was in the room day or night. You had to call a nurse.
I went to the bathroom right in the room and wheeled the basinet outside the door and kept it open. The nurse came running in and scolded me for doing so. She took my son and told me to call when I was done. It was a little over the top!

 

[clori]

Both hospitals my kids were born at had NICU and a regular nursery and strongly encouraged 24 hour in room stays for the most part. With my oldest being small for gestational age at full term (under 4.5lbs) and having some difficulty with maintaining body temperature she was in the nursery a bit for the better warming bed. However the nursery would not do any feedings unless there was medical issues with the mother (or probably adoption too) so she would be with me the majority of time then in the nursery as needed and I was often in a small separated area of the nursery with her (separate from other babies). My second baby was with me just about the entire time but since dh slept at home with older dd the second night and I really wanted to shower I brought the baby to the nursery and I think she used the warming bed but not nearly as much as dd#1. During my tour of hospital #2 I know they said if a mother was alone over night and on strong pain medication they recommended the nursery.

Both hospitals had an alarm system, matching bracelets etc. In the second one there was a big lounge room that we could bring the babies into which was very convenient with young siblings visiting. There was a door in there that lead to an outdoor area but it was a balcony with a tall wall all around it. However if there was a baby in the lounge the door didn't open. I remember not knowing that but there was a guy out there who couldn't open the door. I took the baby out and went to get a nurse and magically the door opened. We laughed when we figured it out. The man had a legitimate reason to be there and also didn't know the door would be locked if a baby came in.

 

[msjprincess]

You can't compare a busy hospital to your own home. I would not have felt comfortable leaving my baby alone in the unlocked hospital room while I was in the bathroom. And I don't know about the hospital you delivered at, but there was no way to bring the bassinet into the bathroom with me - that thing was huge!

MTE

When I had my kids the shower room was down the hall and there would be no way to bring the baby in the room. And I wouldn't leave the baby in the room alone while I was gone for so long. I had a c-sections so I moved pretty slow.

And for the record I am not a helicopter parent at all. But I would not feel comfortable leaving them alone in a hospital room with strangers walking around for over 20 minutes.

 

[frndshpcptn]

I don't think it's about "hating" new moms, but I do think it tends to put pressure on them to do everything "perfectly," even at the expense of their own health. Children need good moms, but they don't need perfect ones. I clearly remember my doctor telling me "You are my patient, not the baby." He convinced me to trust the pediatric staff with DS so we could both go home healthy.

I totally agree with this. I think not utilizing the nursery started me down a path that eventually led to severe PPD. I didn't sleep for 36 hours, I couldn't sleep well with her in the room, I was too anxious to make sure she was ok all the time. I had lost lots of blood during delivery and was weak and exhausted and kept nodding off while holding her in my bed which scared me. The best rest I had was the two hours a nice nurse took her for "testing" and I could not have been more grateful.

I was lucky that I had someone there during the day for the most part so I could shower (although I was hooked up to a catheter for about 28 hours total so no need for the restroom really). They left me hooked up to that and an IV thingy in case I had to go back into the OR the next day.

The experience just set me off down a challenging path that took me a while to recover from.

 

[Mrs. Ciz]

I was wondering about the adoption thing, too.


The hospital where I had my daughter had a nursery and I loved it. They actually had a policy in place that if unless you or your husband was going to be awake, the baby needed to be in the nursery. No sleeping in the room with the baby in there. When you wanted to go to sleep, you just called the nursery and told them and they sent someone up to take your baby to the nursery. You let then know ahead of time if you wanted them to wake you when it was time to feed the baby or if you were okay with the nursery just giving the baby a bottle. I opted to have them bring her to me when it was time for her to eat, but I thought it was pretty neat that you did have the option of sleeping, since goodness knows there won't be much of that going on when you head home.

The hospital both my children were born in had the exact same policy! If you went to sleep, the baby had to go back to the nursery. They brought the baby to you for night feedings, but encouraged new moms to skip one middle of the night feeding feeding and have the nurses bottle feed the baby so the new mom could get a few hours of uninterrupted sleep. I LOVED my hospital!!!!