Did you pay for your wedding &/or get help from others? What year was it?

[A_Princess'_Daddy]

We were married in 2001 in Boston right after 9/11/01, so our turnout dropped significantly as many people were still not traveling. We ended up with about 110 guests at the reception, which was at a nice, but not overly lavish, hotel in Cambridge. The silver lining of the timing, given what a dark time it was for the world, was that the people who made it were the people we truly loved, and the courtesy/political invitees for the most part did not attend.

My wife's parents made a very generous contribution of cash to the wedding and my father and mother paid for the rest, as well as for the rehearsal dinner, which ended up nearly as large as the wedding as we invited all family to it, and the mass/ceremonial portion of the wedding. We paid for the honeymoon ourselves.

 

[MrsDuck]

2012. My parents paid and we were very grateful.

 

[Dawnlight]

We got married abroad, in dh's home country where we were living at the time, in 1996 and paid for it ourselves.

My mother had the costs of coming to the wedding from overseas and the related costs of travel after the wedding.

Dh's parents didn't help in any way.

 

[Disneylover99]

Yep, but happy ending I married an adult a few years later made it almost 20 years. This one we paid for ourselves & had way more fun.

Yeah, I guess marrying a child decreases your odds of having a long, happy marriage.

 

[Adelle Dazeem]

Got married in 2003 - my parents gave us about $1000 and paid for the rehearsal dinner. I paid for my attire (dress, veils, shoes, etc.), cake, and flowers. DH paid for everything else - entire reception (food, open bar, music, etc.), honeymoon. Luckily, he was a saver and we were able to pay cash for the entire event. It took about half of his savings account, but it was worth it. We had a fabulous time!

I confess that I am still pissed at some of his family members who RSVP'd yes and didn't show up - no phone call, no note that they were sick, just didn't show. At the price per person, we lost well over $1000 on no shows.

 

[bethy]

Married in 1996. My parents paid for it all but it was in our church in the afternoon with just cake and punch at the reception in the church hall. Our one luxury was a string quartet. There were probably 80 guests. We had a local honeymoon a couple hours' drive away that we paid for ourselves.

I would have a loved a traditional evening party with real food but we couldn't afford it.

 

[Squirlz]

We paid for all of it. A little more than we expected as the manager of the resort we reserved for all our guest mistakenly thought we were paying for all the rooms!

 

[aprilchem]

Married in 2002. My parents didn't pay for anything, MIL bought some potted plants and flowers the day before because she didn't like the flowers I'd picked out. We paid the rest.

 

[knkmom]

I was married in 1985 and dh and I paid for most of the wedding. My parents paid for my wedding dress, dh's family paid for the rehearsal dinner and our honeymoon. We had about 150 guests and held our reception at a local restaurant with an open bar.

 

[cybrkitn]

I know....it's almost a brag thread.
???
Almost like if you paid for it yourself you were better than people whose parents paid for theirs??

It could be viewed by some as just that. However, while reading the thread, I did notice how the old traditions have changed over time. Gone are the days where the bride's parents paid for everything. In the last few decades, the engaged couple have been paying for part or all of their wedding.

 

[MickeySP]

Yeah, I guess marrying a child decreases your odds of having a long, happy marriage.

You are so right

 

[minkydog]

We married in 1981. DH & I were just finishing up our college degrees, so we didn't have much money, but we paid for everything ourselves. Neither of our parents could have afforded to put any money toward a wedding and we wouldn't have even thought to ask them. My grandfather paid for the material and lace for my dress, which I made myself. We only had $300 at the time, so everything had to fit into that budget. We scaled everything down to the bare minimum and we still had a lovely little wedding. LOL, the baker who did our two-tiered wedding cake overheard us talking about our poor little wedding and she threw in a red velvet groom's cake extra!

'Course, it's only lasted 34 years, so I guess we got our money's worth...

 

[Kogo Shuko]

Not married yet, but my parents promised both my brother and I a certain amount of money if and when we get married. He already got married, and I'm sure he is very grateful for their help.

However, they won't pay for an entire wedding... just up a certain amount. Mind you, I'm pretty frugal, so if and when I do get married, I'll be budgeting it, no matter how much they would have offered.

It was similar in college... I paid for half of my college and my parents paid the other half - and I'm very thankful that I also received a bursary which covered the entire first year's fees.

 

[PigletsPal2]

Guess I'm the old-timer here! We were married in 1966 and had a church wedding with about 100 guests. My cousin, a professional dressmaker, made my gown as her gift to me; I bought the fabric except for the lace overlay which my aunt brought back from Spain after WWII. My bridesmaids made or had made their own dresses; I bought the fabric and the patterns and an aunt made their headpieces. DH and the groomsmen rented their own tuxedos.

We didn't have a rehearsal dinner, and our reception was a gift from the ladies organization of our church (they did this for every couple who were both members of our church). It wasn't anything fancy, just finger sandwiches and other assorted hors d'oeuvres and punch in the church reception hall. We're Baptists, so there was no dancing or alcohol. My parents paid for the cake. Our organist was one of DH's former girlfriends and another of my (many!) cousins, a professional photographer, took all the photographs. (Our wedding photographs were lost in one of our more-than-20 moves, but he had kept the negatives and DDs had them all reprinted for our 30th wedding anniversary.)

We lived in a small town and it seemed like my extended family knew everyone and was known by everyone, so we got discounts on the invitations, flowers, the cake and any other miscellaneous things we decided we needed.

After the church reception, my parents threw a big barbeque in their back yard, this party complete with dancing and alcohol! They paid for this shindig. We didn't have a honeymoon as such; we just took a few days off work and did some sightseeing in Washington DC. In July, we went to Texas so I could be MOH in my MOH's wedding, and we considered that our honeymoon.

All in all, I don't think we, as a family, spent more than $2,000 for the whole celebration.

Queen Colleen

 

[Anesthesia Fine]

I know....it's almost a brag thread.
???
Almost like if you paid for it yourself you were better than people whose parents paid for theirs??

That's funny, I was just thinking that this topic has actually been pretty even-keeled! (I'm pretty touchy about that kind of thing but honestly haven't seen any of the "I wove my dress from grass I grew myself in the backyard and catered it via dumpster diving" type of one-upmanship stuff that usually pops up in threads like this on other sites. Heh.) I am especially liking seeing when everyone got married!

Ours was in 1995, the last gasp of butt-bows and enormous sleeves that would have been the envy of Anne Shirley. I was 23, he was 26. My folks paid for the wedding, his mom paid for the rehearsal dinner, we paid for the honeymoon, we offered to pay for an extra hour at the reception because everyone was still in full party mode...but the venue apologetically told us we had to leave because we drank the bar dry. It was altogether an excellent time, and I am grateful to our families for it.

 

[NewRVLady]

Guess I'm the old-timer here! We were married in 1966 and had a church wedding with about 100 guests. My cousin, a professional dressmaker, made my gown as her gift to me; I bought the fabric except for the lace overlay which my aunt brought back from Spain after WWII. My bridesmaids made or had made their own dresses; I bought the fabric and the patterns and an aunt made their headpieces. DH and the groomsmen rented their own tuxedos.

Memories....I was in a wedding in 1970 and we all bought the same pattern and received the fabric from Bride and sewed our dresses.

 

[PigletsPal2]

I just remembered a funny story. Our organist (one of DH's former girlfriends) was the middle of three daughters in her family, each born about two years apart. Her older sister had a huge extravagant wedding the year before we were married and her younger sister had one equally extravagant the following year. Her parents were exhausted and didn't want to do that again, so her mom took her aside and said "Mary Anna, I'll give you $15,000 if you'll elope!" Later that same week, he father took her aside and said "Mary Anna, I'll give you $20,000 if you'll elope!" Mary Anna, whose last relationship had been with DH several years earlier, said "Someone make it $25,000 and I'll look for a man!"

Don't know if she ever got her money, but she did find a man, the love of her life for more than 40 years.

Queen Colleeen

 

[Mrs. Ciz]

My parents paid for all of my college education and were in the middle of paying for my 3 siblings college educations when I got married so I paid for almost all of my wedding myself. My mom gave me $1500. DH paid for my bouquet, my rings, his groomsmen's boutonnieres, and the honeymoon plane tickets. His parents paid for the rehearsal dinner. We used my timeshare for a Mexican honeymoon in Ixtapa. I paid for my dress, the church wedding with organist, trumpeter & vocalist, the horse and carriage, wedding flowers, hotel cocktail hour and buffet luncheon with open bar, wedding cake, DJ, photographer & videographer, favors, invitations, programs, and décor. All said and done it cost about $10,000 for 140 people in 1990 (not including the honeymoon or rehearsal dinner).

 

[DeaverTex]

We were married in 1976, and paid for it ourselves. Of course, it was just the honorarium to the minister, some money for the silk flowers (made by one of Mrs. Tex's friends), and a few bucks to the church ladies to defray their expenses making the cakes and putting some snacks together. And Mrs. Tex's dress, which she made in my BOQ room, with me helping. If the whole thing cost $500, I'd be shocked. I'm not including the rings (about $500 total) in that, because I paid for those. (Well, duh!)

 

[soccerdad72]

Married in 1997 - my wife's parents paid for nearly all of the wedding. My parents paid for the rehearsal dinner. I think we had something like 200-225 people at the reception.