Did you pay for your wedding &/or get help from others? What year was it?

[bsblady01]

we got married in 2005 while I was still in college we paid for our own wedding

 

[ZephyrHawk]

My parents paid for the majority, but we paid for some, and his dad's family and his aunt chipped in for a bit. It was 2003.

 

[Andtototoo]

It was the early 1980s. We had a traditional NY style big white wedding. Bucks, serious bucks. My father was incredibly cheap and selfish, but paying for his daughters' weddings was something even he considered a requirement of parenting. My parents paid for everything except the band and the photographer. They insisted on spending way more on food and drink than I thought remotely necessary, but it was their money. Shrug. Then again, people still talk about the awesomeness of the food and drink at my wedding 3 decades later, so maybe they were right!

We plan on paying for a set sum of money for our daughter's wedding assuming she has a "regular" wedding. She won't get anything if she elopes or has a far flung destination wedding and she knows that. So it will be her choice if she gets money from us or not.

 

[BlovesC]

We got married in 2010 and paid for it ourselves. And we wouldn't have had it any other way...it went perfectly!

 

[ronandannette]

That's funny, I was just thinking that this topic has actually been pretty even-keeled! (I'm pretty touchy about that kind of thing but honestly haven't seen any of the "I wove my dress from grass I grew myself in the backyard and catered it via dumpster diving" type of one-upmanship stuff that usually pops up in threads like this on other sites. Heh.) I am especially liking seeing when everyone got married!

Ours was in 1995, the last gasp of butt-bows and enormous sleeves that would have been the envy of Anne Shirley. I was 23, he was 26. My folks paid for the wedding, his mom paid for the rehearsal dinner, we paid for the honeymoon, we offered to pay for an extra hour at the reception because everyone was still in full party mode...but the venue apologetically told us we had to leave because we drank the bar dry. It was altogether an excellent time, and I am grateful to our families for it.

Thank you SOOOO much for the idea - I'm "putting a pin in it" for the future when DS gets married.

 

[LBIJim]

I've already set aside 500K each for my daughters' weddings at Disney. Mickey and Minnie as best man and maid of honor, fireworks cruises, white horses pulling Cinderella's pumpkin/carriage, dozens of characters to mingle with the guests, 6 hours private MK time, etc. etc. etc.

Everyone is welcome.....and of course you'll be expected to cover your plate.

 

[rszdtrvl]

1997, paid for it ourselves. Justice of the Peace presided at the house.

1996. We flew to Reno and "got hitched". Paid for it all ourselves. Poor 20 year olds working part time jobs.

My parents did pay for a reception a couple months later though, at my grandparents house. Have no idea how much that was. Probably around $300 or so.

 

[Mrs Eeyore]

My mother had a firm conviction that the bride's parents had to pay for the wedding and she would have been deeply offended if we hadn't allowed her to. This was in 1989. She had a strict budget -- I think it was $6,000 -- and we stuck to it. It was a nice wedding and it did the job. We're still married. Oh, and I should add that mother-in-law matched that budget to pay for the honeymoon. We had no complaints.

 

[NewRVLady]

My son is getting married this year-its going to be "something else"

the rehearsal dinner is costing us more than my Mom paid for our wedding reception!

The wedding is a tad "over the top"-but I am saying this from my guess of cost of it and that they have a band instead of DJ (I have been to only 2 weddings with a band and they were pricey events)-bride's parents paying for it
Grandparents and wealthy Aunt/uncle hosting engagement party at a Country Club (I have never attended an engagement party)
Wealthy aunt/uncle's DD in bridal party-the girls are having their bachelorette party at their Mountain retreat in Colorado-with a Spa day at a very upscale resort

 

[Bec3b1g]

1993. We were in college and paid for it ourselves sorta, but everyone pitched in to help. DH's dad & stepmom have weddings at their home so we used their venue. There was no need to rent chairs or tents. An aunt made the wedding cake. We got discounts on catering, flowers, music, and helicopter (so over the top!) since the vendors had a relationship with in-laws. We had a ton of people at the wedding and if I could do it over again, I would have a destination wedding with just the 2 of us. I couldn't please anyone. My parents and his are divorced. No one could stand to be in the same room together. Everyone wanted their own party. It was stressful and we ended up getting sued after the wedding was over.

 

[mjkacmom]

We had a church wedding with a cocktail reception at a historic mansion. My parents paid for almost everything - invitations, limos, photographer, dj, dress, cake, venue... And my IL's paid for the rehearsal dinner and flowers. We paid for the honeymoon. This was in 1995, and we were 6 years out of college (when we started dating).

We were saving up for a down payment for a house (which was much more than the cost of the wedding).

 

[Wendy31]

We got married in 1995. It was an afternoon wedding in the spring. The ceremony was at my DH's parents' church and was officiated by the pastor of the church. The ceremony was held in the church's fellowship hall/banquet room - well, in the banquet room & also outside as well on the church grounds just outside of the fellowship hall. It was the typical southern church wedding.

My parents paid for most of the wedding - invitations, programs, photographer, videographer, most of the flowers, ceremony décor (candles, pew ribbons, etc.), my wedding dress & my "going away" outfit, my sister's maid of honor dress, hats & necklaces for the bridesmaids, catering for the reception (an afternoon "tea" type affair w/ various finger foods/appetizers), the wedding cake, the groom's cake, etc.

DH's parents paid for the rehearsal dinner, my bouquet, the men's boutonnieres, the mothers' corsages, the men's tux rentals, 2 of my bridesmaids' dresses, the flowergirl's dress, & an offering to the church/pastor.

I paid for my shoes - primarily because the ones I wanted were more than my mom wanted to spend. LOL! Oh, & I also paid for some of the décor (like the table centerpieces) for the reception because mom & I weren't seeing eye-to-eye on things.

DH paid for the honeymoon.

 

[cfriend416]

I am getting married this fall and inviting about 90 people. My parents are giving us $2000 towards the meal. We are paying for everything else. My fiance's parents have not offered anything, which is fine. It'd be nice if they'd offer to give us a rehearsal dinner, but we'd never expect anything from either of our parents. We've always been pretty self-sufficient.

ETA We are in our mid-twenties and live together.

 

[A_Princess'_Daddy]

I confess that I am still pissed at some of his family members who RSVP'd yes and didn't show up - no phone call, no note that they were sick, just didn't show. At the price per person, we lost well over $1000 on no shows.

We were fortunate because the hotel gave us a refund due to the events of 9/11, as we had a lot of people back out in the two weeks before the wedding, after we'd given our final count and made our final deposit. Nearly all of our guests had the courtesy to let us know they wouldn't be attending (although many just a day or two before, when we were focused on other things), but in theory the hotel had no obligation to give us back what ended up being a really nice chunk of money that our parents then equally nicely allowed us to keep.

 

[tvguy]

1982. MIL paid for the catering, all $500 of it My mom paid for the rehearsal dinner. We paid for everything else. We used my mom's half acre backyard for the reception for free, and only paid $100 for the use of the church. Total tab came to $3,000.......for everything......which is what the estimate is just for the flowers for my son's wedding next year.

 

[Simba's Mom]

Married in 1982, and we paid for it all, a whopping $150! My parents weren't speaking to me (at the time, they REALLY opposed the wedding!). DH and I got married on a golf course, wore jeans and a white blouse. The only attendants/guests were the golf course owner and golf pro. Our "reception" consisted of the two of us going into the pro shop's bar and having a couple drinks. Thirty years later we celebrated our anniversary with a dinner at Artist Point, custom cake, that served as our reception. It certainly cost more!

 

[DVC-Don]

1980: My wife and I paid for everything except the reception band, her father paid for that.

 

[blana]

My parents paid for most of the wedding. Our total allowed budget was $5000,and we did not use the full amount. In 1999.

 

[Snowysmom]

We were married in 1976. My father and DFIL split the cost of the reception which was around $1200 for a luncheon with 75 people at a restaurant function room. I paid for my dress and veil and flowers. DH paid for his tux and the minister. DFIL gave us the honeymoon, to Disney of course, as a wedding gift. MY dfather gave us $1000. The rehearsal dinner was a cookout at my house paid for by DH. DH and I paid for the wedding photos.

 

[Holly Quinlan]

May 2008
My mom paid for ceremony/reception site. My grandparents on my moms side paid for the catering and pianist and flute player. My dad/stepmom paid for decorations. Grandparents on dads side paid for flowers. An "aunt" my moms best friend paid for the cake. My in laws paid for DJ and the pastor. My mom and her parents went in on the rehearsal dinner. We paid for all the "little" things. Very grateful for all the help from everyone but now I would have much rather taken the money and eloped.