Moms.....I need suggestions and sensitivity traing.

skateshome

skateshome

Mouseketeer
Joined
Jan 16, 2012
First of all.....we have 7 and 8 year old daughters and are all big Disney fans. We are waiting to close on DVC in the next couple of weeks for BLT. We've gone he last 4 years in a row in May and will be staying with DVc points at BLT again this coming May 2016.

Here's the problem......I would really like to go in November for a short trip. however, my wife's part time job has its busy season then so there is no way she will even ask for time off. Our 8 year is just like me. Up early and go all day. Our 7 year old is a little more like Mom. They like to take their time in the morning and generally go at quite a bit slower pace.

I've had a couple of "what if" conversations with my girls and the 8 year old would love for just me and her to go and 7 year old would just as much like to stay at home with mom. I explained to them we will probably not do this and they know we're going next May anyway.....so no big deal to them.

So here's the problem. Wife is big Disney fan herself.

Am I out of bounds for even considering this? Am I a bad husband? Will she divorce me after 20 years? LOL!

Would you do this and if so any suggestions on a good way to present my case or how to go about bringing it up?

Silly post I know but it's possible there could be some hurt feelings for even thinking about it. LOL!

Help me Disboards....or set me straight!!
 


skateshome said:
First of all.....we have 7 and 8 year old daughters and are all big Disney fans. We are waiting to close on DVC in the next couple of weeks for BLT. We've gone he last 4 years in a row in May and will be staying with DVc points at BLT again this coming May 2016.

Here's the problem......I would really like to go in November for a short trip. however, my wife's part time job has its busy season then so there is no way she will even ask for time off. Our 8 year is just like me. Up early and go all day. Our 7 year old is a little more like Mom. They like to take their time in the morning and generally go at quite a bit slower pace.

I've had a couple of "what if" conversations with my girls and the 8 year old would love for just me and her to go and 7 year old would just as much like to stay at home with mom. I explained to them we will probably not do this and they know we're going next May anyway.....so no big deal to them.

So here's the problem. Wife is big Disney fan herself.

Am I out of bounds for even considering this? Am I a bad husband? Will she divorce me after 20 years? LOL!

Would you do this and if so any suggestions on a good way to present my case or how to go about bringing it up?

Silly post I know but it's possible there could be some hurt feelings for even thinking about it. LOL!

Help me Disboards....or set me straight!!
Click to expand...

I think it would be a great time to spend one on one time with just one daughter but I wouldn't do it. I couldn't imagine leaving part of my family home and being able to enjoy Disney without them.

With your daughters at such a young age I would be very worried about the other one having hurt feelings and envy being left at home even if in the hypothetical world everyone is ok with it.

I know many people enjoy trips with just part of the family, without their kids, without their spouse, etc, etc. That just isn't me though. For me they are what makes Disney special and memorable.
 
So much of this depends on your wife. If it were me (the wife who loves Disney), and my DH had an opportunity to take one of my sons (who loves Disney) while the other son and I stayed home because of work, I would be disappointed that I couldn't go, but I would encourage and urge him to go anyway. What an awesome one-on-one time for you and your DD to share! So, is your wife the kind of wife that would be happy for you and DD to have this special memory together or will she see it as playing favorites or something negative? Only you can answer that question.
 


I would like to believe that I am mature enough to handle such a scenario but I think I would feel hurt and frustrated that I would have to work while my husband was off having a big time at WDW without me. :headache: Not proud of it but I don't think it would end well for him. FYI we are 15 years in and I wouldn't leave him but it might be ugly:crazy2::crutches::crazy2:
 
I would ask your wife. I am the big Disney fan in my house and go solo alot. Plus each of my kids had a trip with me while my husband was home with the other one.

My husband has had a conference at the contemporary and stayed an extra couple of days to spend in disney when we couldn't go due to school. So I say it would not hurt to ask.
 
I'm going on a mother daughter trip with older dd, who is turning 16, and leaving dh and younger dd at home. The ONLY reason I'm comfortable with this dh isn't a big Disney fan and I will take younger dd on a similar trip when she turns 16.

Even though dh had absolutely no desire to make this a family trip, he still struggled a little with us going.

If dh wanted to take dd and leave me at home because I had to work, I'd be pretty upset.
 
I would kick my husbands azz!!!! Lol.

On the other hand I would never let "busy season" keep me from asking off work. I'd be gone!!!
 
We like to do different things with each of our 3 children. My wife would be, and has been, fine with me taking one or two or three of the kids alone. Just be sure everyone gets their time with you, and time with your wife.
 
I would be totally fine with that as long as the other kid was ok with staying home (which is sounds like she is). My husband travels a lot so I'm very used to manning the fort, wouldn't be different than any other trip.

But I don't know your wife, you do :)

Are you sure the kids aren't going to blab this to her before you get to her? That would last about one minute in my house LOL.

GL!
 
Alesia said:
You should never had said one word to your daughters without discussing it thoroughly with your wife first. Now you've put your wife in a position of not being able to say no without feeling like a jerk. Not cool.
Click to expand...

As I said in my OP.....the girls are fine either way. Its her I'm more concerned about. For the record I encourage her all the time to take the girls together or individually on outings. I think it's good bonding time and when solid memories are made. But I'm a dude....we don't think like Moms.
 
skateshome said:
As I said in my OP.....the girls are fine either way. Its her I'm more concerned about. For the record I encourage her all the time to take the girls together or individually on outings. I think it's good bonding time and when solid memories are made. But I'm a dude....we don't think like Moms.
Click to expand...
Last year, I took our 3 kids to Star Wars Weekend alone. A 10 day trip. We had an amazing time, but the kids do get a lot of mom time too. She's not quite the Disney fan that I am though.
 
I took each of my boys on a separate trip this year. I really enjoyed the one on one time with each of them. The child that stayed home also enjoyed one on one time with Daddy. With our work schedules whole family trips are hard to fit in. I would plan something else special with the other child later on as well. It wouldn't need to be Disney.
 
skateshome said:
As I said in my OP.....the girls are fine either way. Its her I'm more concerned about. For the record I encourage her all the time to take the girls together or individually on outings. I think it's good bonding time and when solid memories are made. But I'm a dude....we don't think like Moms.
Click to expand...
I do think like a mom, because I am one. She knows the girls know it's a possibility, so she's going to say yes even if she doesn't want to. You have put her in a situation where she can't say no without feeling like she's taking something away from your daughter. Even if your daughter is fine with it.

You should have talked to your wife first.
 
I encouraged my DH to go on a solo trip for his 30th bday. My ILs decided to fund the trip and paid for my then 2yr old DS to go with him (DS's first trip too). I stayed at home with our then 9 yr old, 3yr old and 1 yr old. They had a blast and is one of the few one on one memories my DH has had with the kids. I also took our 9yr old for her 10th bday while he stayed home woth the other 3.
No reason to not do solo trips in a family that goes to WDW yearly as a whole family.
 
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