Teenage DD bringing a friend?

[bekkio]

I'm debating whether or not to allow my teenage DD to bring a friend along with us on our 7day western cruise next summer. I know we can't cover all of the expenses for her, but here is the split I was considering:

We cover:
Cruise fare & gratuities
Meals pre/post cruise
Transportation to/from port

Her family covers:
Airfare
Excursions
Spending money


What am I leaving out? I'm really hoping to be able to make this work.

TIA!

 

[PrincessShmoo]

I'm debating whether or not to allow my teenage DD to bring a friend along with us on our 7day western cruise next summer. I know we can't cover all of the expenses for her, but here is the split I was considering:

We cover:
Cruise fare & gratuities
Meals pre/post cruise
Transportation to/from port

Her family covers:
Airfare
Excursions
Spending money


What am I leaving out? I'm really hoping to be able to make this work.

TIA!

Does your "gratuities" include any room service tips?

How about photos, smoothies, souvenirs? Is that "spending money"?

And don't forget about getting permission for you to OK any medical treatment, if necessary. As well as passport? or certified birth certificate & photo ID?

 

[RHSTigerMom]

My DD has a friend that pretty much goes on all vacations with us. She even went to the beach w/us this summer while DD was traveling abroad. On our Carnival cruise a couple if years ago, she (parents) was responsible for cruise fare and spending money. We are close enough to drive to PC so airfare wasn't an issue. We picked up any meals pre/post, it's just easier.

On our March 2014 Wonder cruise, she will be responsible for cruise and air fare since we're leaving from Miami. She and DD will both be 18 and have their own inside stateroom.

 

[wdwwishes]

OP, i think your suggested split sounds reasonable and as a parent I'd agree to that.

 

[brianvdb]

I'm debating whether or not to allow my teenage DD to bring a friend along with us on our 7day western cruise next summer. I know we can't cover all of the expenses for her, but here is the split I was considering:

We cover:
Cruise fare & gratuities
Meals pre/post cruise
Transportation to/from port

Her family covers:
Airfare
Excursions
Spending money


What am I leaving out? I'm really hoping to be able to make this work.

TIA!

Will you be staying at a hotel pre- or post-cruise?

"Spending money" on the ship will mean using a KTTW card. Will the friend's KTTW have charging privileges? Are you going to ask that the parents attach their credit card to their daughter's KTTW card? Might make things a little easier in case of an unexpected expense (i.e. trip to the medical center).

 

[TheLanes]

I thought if you invite someone, you pay for it all. If they ask to come, then that split makes more sense

 

[zippingalong]

We've taken our DDs friend with us for years. I've always paid for everything, but this year, I just asked her mom to chip in $500.

But, the $500 is for 2 nights at Disney eating onsite, a day at Typhoon Lagoon and a 7 night cruise on the Fantasy in concierge including excursions.

She won't pay for anything on the trip except shopping.

I've never asked for money before, but this trip is super expensive and I figured if it covered tips and excursions it was all good.

Her parents didn't have a problem with it.

BTW, we leave for Disney Wednesday!

 

[neg58]

I thought if you invite someone, you pay for it all. If they ask to come, then that split makes more sense

That's very generous of you! Most people expect to pay the extra costs that would be incurred, like airfare. I'd also expect the friend to pay the cruise fare since it is an extra fare that wouldn't be incurred if the child didn't come. I wouldn't expect the extra child to pay for gas or luggage tips, meals on the way.

My daughter just traveled with a friend and I paid her airfare and they paid the rest, which I thought was more than nice. It didn't cost them any extra for the place they stayed in (St. Maarten) but they did pay a lot for meals and my daughter said they went on Rhinos (probably not much extra to get a 3 person, not a 2 person) and jet skis.

Nancy

 

[lbgraves]

WOW! If one of my kids was going on a cruise with a friend I would expect to pay for their cruise fare, transportation and spending money.

 

[cruisecrasher]

WOW! If one of my kids was going on a cruise with a friend I would expect to pay for their cruise fare, transportation and spending money.

Me too!

 

[MichelleVW]

I thought if you invite someone, you pay for it all. If they ask to come, then that split makes more sense

Nope. I've had my DDs friends with us on vacation and I pay for the hotel but they pay for their own park ticket and food in the parks.

 

[zippingalong]

WOW! If one of my kids was going on a cruise with a friend I would expect to pay for their cruise fare, transportation and spending money.

Well,it started years ago, I got a "Kids Sale Free" deal on the Wonder and let my daughter bring a friend...It didn't cost me much except taxes and tips and such..not much money.

From there, she's just brought someone. Sometimes (like this year) it's expensive... but I want my DD to have fun, and I like that my DH and I also get some adult time without worrying about my teen being "bored".

I guess my daughter's friend is pretty lucky...She's been on multiple cruises, (Disney, CCL and RCCL), the Poly, BWV, AKL multiple times...I just like my daughter having fun. And if it makes it more fun for her to have company and I can do it, I'll pay for it.

 

[robinb]

I'm debating whether or not to allow my teenage DD to bring a friend along with us on our 7day western cruise next summer. I know we can't cover all of the expenses for her, but here is the split I was considering:

We cover:
Cruise fare & gratuities
Meals pre/post cruise
Transportation to/from port

Her family covers:
Airfare
Excursions
Spending money


What am I leaving out? I'm really hoping to be able to make this work.

TIA!

That is exactly what we do when we invite my DD's friends to WDW. A WDW vacation or a cruise is soooo expensive I wouldn't be able to pay for the whole thing and my DD's friends' families are perfectly happy to pay towards the vacation. I ask the FAMILY before asking the girl to make sure they can swing it.

 

[plumeriainseattle]

I'm debating whether or not to allow my teenage DD to bring a friend along with us on our 7day western cruise next summer. I know we can't cover all of the expenses for her, but here is the split I was considering:

We cover:
Cruise fare & gratuities
Meals pre/post cruise
Transportation to/from port

Her family covers:
Airfare
Excursions
Spending money

What am I leaving out? I'm really hoping to be able to make this work.

TIA!

I just had this discussion with my 17yr old daughter and we are debating her bringing a friend. I have offered to cover cruise fare, excursions and any food type stuffs. Her parents would cover airfare, spending money, souvenirs, etc.

I said I would cover excursions because If we decide to do an activity, I don't want the friend left out. And, food stuffs for the same reason. However, we will have a conversation about charging things and not going crazy. I have a great relationship with my daughters friend and they are both really respectful and good kids.

In the end, do what feels comfortable for you and the other family. An open, Frank conversation prior to booking and laying out expectations in writing ahead of time will save possible headaches down the road.

 

[samily]

My DD has brought a friend for several of our cruises. I have always spoken to her family first before mentioning anything to her. The friend pays for airfare and spending money. We pay for everything else including any excursions that our family was planning before, during, and after the cruise. We pay for their trip insurance and I do require the friend to have a passport.

Dont forget to take into consideration that adding another traveler may require you to need bigger hotel rooms, rental cars, another stateroom, etc. We are a family of 5, so when we add another person we need to "upgrade" each of those things.

Have a great cruise!

 

[TheLanes]

That's very generous of you! Most people expect to pay the extra costs that would be incurred, like airfare. I'd also expect the friend to pay the cruise fare since it is an extra fare that wouldn't be incurred if the child didn't come. I wouldn't expect the extra child to pay for gas or luggage tips, meals on the way.

My daughter just traveled with a friend and I paid her airfare and they paid the rest, which I thought was more than nice. It didn't cost them any extra for the place they stayed in (St. Maarten) but they did pay a lot for meals and my daughter said they went on Rhinos (probably not much extra to get a 3 person, not a 2 person) and jet skis.

Nancy

It's not a generosity thing, it's common manners. You invite, you expect to pay. If the invitation to join starts with the caveat of splitting some costs, then that's fine, but that conversation should definitely start with that.

 

[pfp258]

We allowed our two daughters to each bring a friend on a seven night cruise on the Dream last year. We invited, we paid, for everything.

 

[bekkio]

Thanks for the advice, all. We've approached the family with slightly different terms, and now it's just a matter of checking dates and hammering out the fine details.

 

[TheLanes]

Thanks for the advice, all. We've approached the family with slightly different terms, and now it's just a matter of checking dates and hammering out the fine details.

Perfect way to do it! You're a cool parent!

 

[lilpooh108]

It's not a generosity thing, it's common manners. You invite, you expect to pay. If the invitation to join starts with the caveat of splitting some costs, then that's fine, but that conversation should definitely start with that.

I guess it depends on the people you're friends with. I wouldn't expect someone to pay for my daughter's entire cruise fare even if she were invited. I'd expect a pretty even split and would speak realistically to the other parent about what we can afford or not since they'd be taking her on an "extra" vacation that wasn't a part of our family plan.

I personally wouldn't find it offensive at all if another mom came to me with an even split idea. I would be flattered that their family wanted to take DD on vacation. Whether I'd consent to it is a different matter.