Here I am in the Park Formerly Known As MGM Studios, standing on Sunset Boulevard and feeling the burn of the July Florida sun on my head. Im alone, save the thousands of tourists buzzing around, and a balding overweight actor to my left, practicing his pickup skills on me. Not a single family member or friend for hundreds of miles. Completely isolated in the biggest tourist destination in the world.
How did this happen?
The Pre-trip backstory stuff you need to know
Lets go back in time back before grinning at the stranger next to me on the Rock and Roll Roller Coaster, before text messaging my husband on the Walt Disney World Railroad as it circled around Space Mountain back when Disney World magic wasnt on my mind at all and it was Life As Usual. Im at the office, working away and minding my own business, when a coworker shows me a logistics class notice which happens to be held at the Boardwalk Inn in Orlando, Florida. Knowing my love of all things Disney, my coworker mused how wonderful it would be to take that class. Especially on works dime.
And then the seed gets planted.
I think. And I think. And I think about it.
And the seed sprouts a little.
And I start to wonder is it SO unreasonable for me to think that this is a possibility? If work advertises this class, is it possible they will send little ol me to Florida? What would it take for this trip to happen?
Imagine the scenario, if you will. We discover this class on trucks or transportation or something and Im all, How can I deceive er, convince my boss to send me to this transport-something class so I can scam er, earn a free trip to the World? How can I somehow connect the dots from my job to this silly pointless class? Since the big boss is female, unbuttoning the first two buttons on my blouse and batting my eyes wont cut it this time. No, Im going to have to resort to different tactics.
The Disney gods were smiling upon me that day, my friends. Somehow I found a way to connect the dots (Transportation, or whatever this class is, definitely will help me advance in my career because, lets face it, I dont know squat about Transportation, or whatever this class is, so surely taking this class will further develop my background in logistics, or whatever other job this class relates to.) and whatever I said, well it worked. She bought it. I didnt even have to beg. Or show a little leg.
So, I was in. And so was my coworker, Jakie. The only drawback at this point was that work wouldnt pay for us to stay at the Boardwalk Inn since it was over the $109 hotel allowance. A setback, yes, but a minor one at that. But I, being the Disney authority that I am, could easily find satisfactory sleeping arrangements that put us squarely in the middle of the action at $109 a night...sort of.
Im tinkering around the internet one Sunday and going off into LaLa Land, dreaming of my upcoming trip, and collecting all sorts of information about the place I had left so many years ago (three, to be exact). I stumbled into Mousesavers.com just to see what kind of discounts are to be had. The Boardwalk Inn code only cut down the price to $275, which was a far cry from the blocked room rates ($210/night). But the codes for moderates was $119/night. Okay, so it was slightly over the allowance, but surely I could cough up $10 a night on my own for the privilege of staying on property. Surely.
So we were all booked for a week-long stay at WDW at the Port Orleans French Quarter, which was new for both of us. Now, before I go much further let me say that my partner-in-crime and co-conspirator Jakie had never been to WDW. Did you hear me? NEVER BEEN. And not only had she never stepped foot into the place, she didnt know anything about it. Yes, she lives in a bubble. And yes, there really are people out there who know nothing about the place we know and love so well. Its true, they really do exist. I have proof.
I stuck out my chest, saluted her, and told her that her own personal tour guide to the World was ready to serve. I told her to leave all the planning to me; I would conjure up an itinerary during our stay, complete with dining arrangements, park days, and suggested touring plans. After all, it was my Disney duty. Walt would have wanted it this way.
So what DO you get when you trick your boss into sending you to a pointless class which happens to be at Disney World? You get a free solo vacation.
sort of.
Sort of, meaning it was half free, and it was half solo. Does that count? Plus, youve got that annoying mandatory class stuff to attend, and that can hamper park time big time.
Class runs Tuesday to Friday, and Jakie planned to leave Friday evening. That left me four days of serious solo time. So I rolled up my sleeves and started to plan like the wind.
Up next:
Day 1. Getting lost is the best way to get to know a place, I hear
Table of Contents
Day 1. Getting lost is the best way to get to know a place, I hear
Part 1. The evil insect...how vicious do you grow them down here, anyway?
Part 2. How many tourists does it take to find property?
Part 3. Jakie and The Best Tour Guide Ever
Part 4. Well, thats one way to revoke a dinner invitation.
Part 5. Masters of our domain. Not.
Day 2. That really important class on trucks or something (AKA: the reason Im here)
Part 1. How many clues does it take to get the center of a truck class?
Part 2. When Hell freezeth over
Part 3. Being a Know-It-All has its social disadvantages
Part 4. The weirdest dinner order ever
Part 5. If you want to eat paradise, simply walk around and take it.
Day 3. How to keep everyone awake in a transportation class, even if thats the reason they came to Disney World.
Part 1. Trapped in a room with a bunch of Disney heretics
Part 2. The Brady Bunch sat here
Part 3. Why you should never order fish at the Flying Fish
Day 4. When Disney and Transportation collide
Part 1. Better off unsaid
Part 2. Offending dinner hosts, part II
Part 3. In memory of Dan. A mini report.
Day 5. Mommy, Look at the Freaky Lady By Herself
Part 1. My last day in Hell
Part 2. Marvin K Mooneys grand exit
Part 3. What you get when you cross a Brit with grape jelly.
Part 4. Bathroom treasures
Part 5. Crossing the line between man and bum
Part 6. Offending the dinner host, part III. Or: Attack of the Mexican bugs
Day 6. The Return of Cast Member Hucifer
Part 1. When FastPass lines are longer than standby
Part 2. Conversations with myself
Part 3. When the Streetmosphere harass.
Part 4. Tower of Terror doesn't go upside down. Who knew?
Part 5. Hucifer the drunk.
Part 6. Why you should never leave me in a pool alone with your children
Day 7. The Expedition Everest Singles line: How I developed a love for all things single
Part 1. If it weren't for the millions of tour groups, this park would be empty
Part 2. Lone Ride Nazi Slays Entire Crowd Single-Handedly. Story at 11.
Part 2. What could be better than a plate of vegetarian lasagna?
Part 3. You met the worst of them, now heres one of the best
Part 4. Looking the fool taking pictures of yourself and your food
Day 8: Too much of a good thing
Part 1. Never berate a bear
Part 2. How to work Will Smith into your trip report
Part 3. Blue shorts and a blue funk
Part 4. Talker Tim vs. the very cantankerous caterpillar
Day 9: The Good-bye girl
How did this happen?
The Pre-trip backstory stuff you need to know
Lets go back in time back before grinning at the stranger next to me on the Rock and Roll Roller Coaster, before text messaging my husband on the Walt Disney World Railroad as it circled around Space Mountain back when Disney World magic wasnt on my mind at all and it was Life As Usual. Im at the office, working away and minding my own business, when a coworker shows me a logistics class notice which happens to be held at the Boardwalk Inn in Orlando, Florida. Knowing my love of all things Disney, my coworker mused how wonderful it would be to take that class. Especially on works dime.
And then the seed gets planted.
I think. And I think. And I think about it.
And the seed sprouts a little.
And I start to wonder is it SO unreasonable for me to think that this is a possibility? If work advertises this class, is it possible they will send little ol me to Florida? What would it take for this trip to happen?
Imagine the scenario, if you will. We discover this class on trucks or transportation or something and Im all, How can I deceive er, convince my boss to send me to this transport-something class so I can scam er, earn a free trip to the World? How can I somehow connect the dots from my job to this silly pointless class? Since the big boss is female, unbuttoning the first two buttons on my blouse and batting my eyes wont cut it this time. No, Im going to have to resort to different tactics.
The Disney gods were smiling upon me that day, my friends. Somehow I found a way to connect the dots (Transportation, or whatever this class is, definitely will help me advance in my career because, lets face it, I dont know squat about Transportation, or whatever this class is, so surely taking this class will further develop my background in logistics, or whatever other job this class relates to.) and whatever I said, well it worked. She bought it. I didnt even have to beg. Or show a little leg.
So, I was in. And so was my coworker, Jakie. The only drawback at this point was that work wouldnt pay for us to stay at the Boardwalk Inn since it was over the $109 hotel allowance. A setback, yes, but a minor one at that. But I, being the Disney authority that I am, could easily find satisfactory sleeping arrangements that put us squarely in the middle of the action at $109 a night...sort of.
Im tinkering around the internet one Sunday and going off into LaLa Land, dreaming of my upcoming trip, and collecting all sorts of information about the place I had left so many years ago (three, to be exact). I stumbled into Mousesavers.com just to see what kind of discounts are to be had. The Boardwalk Inn code only cut down the price to $275, which was a far cry from the blocked room rates ($210/night). But the codes for moderates was $119/night. Okay, so it was slightly over the allowance, but surely I could cough up $10 a night on my own for the privilege of staying on property. Surely.
So we were all booked for a week-long stay at WDW at the Port Orleans French Quarter, which was new for both of us. Now, before I go much further let me say that my partner-in-crime and co-conspirator Jakie had never been to WDW. Did you hear me? NEVER BEEN. And not only had she never stepped foot into the place, she didnt know anything about it. Yes, she lives in a bubble. And yes, there really are people out there who know nothing about the place we know and love so well. Its true, they really do exist. I have proof.
I stuck out my chest, saluted her, and told her that her own personal tour guide to the World was ready to serve. I told her to leave all the planning to me; I would conjure up an itinerary during our stay, complete with dining arrangements, park days, and suggested touring plans. After all, it was my Disney duty. Walt would have wanted it this way.
So what DO you get when you trick your boss into sending you to a pointless class which happens to be at Disney World? You get a free solo vacation.
sort of.
Sort of, meaning it was half free, and it was half solo. Does that count? Plus, youve got that annoying mandatory class stuff to attend, and that can hamper park time big time.
Class runs Tuesday to Friday, and Jakie planned to leave Friday evening. That left me four days of serious solo time. So I rolled up my sleeves and started to plan like the wind.
Up next:
Day 1. Getting lost is the best way to get to know a place, I hear
Table of Contents
Day 1. Getting lost is the best way to get to know a place, I hear
Part 1. The evil insect...how vicious do you grow them down here, anyway?
Part 2. How many tourists does it take to find property?
Part 3. Jakie and The Best Tour Guide Ever
Part 4. Well, thats one way to revoke a dinner invitation.
Part 5. Masters of our domain. Not.
Day 2. That really important class on trucks or something (AKA: the reason Im here)
Part 1. How many clues does it take to get the center of a truck class?
Part 2. When Hell freezeth over
Part 3. Being a Know-It-All has its social disadvantages
Part 4. The weirdest dinner order ever
Part 5. If you want to eat paradise, simply walk around and take it.
Day 3. How to keep everyone awake in a transportation class, even if thats the reason they came to Disney World.
Part 1. Trapped in a room with a bunch of Disney heretics
Part 2. The Brady Bunch sat here
Part 3. Why you should never order fish at the Flying Fish
Day 4. When Disney and Transportation collide
Part 1. Better off unsaid
Part 2. Offending dinner hosts, part II
Part 3. In memory of Dan. A mini report.
Day 5. Mommy, Look at the Freaky Lady By Herself
Part 1. My last day in Hell
Part 2. Marvin K Mooneys grand exit
Part 3. What you get when you cross a Brit with grape jelly.
Part 4. Bathroom treasures
Part 5. Crossing the line between man and bum
Part 6. Offending the dinner host, part III. Or: Attack of the Mexican bugs
Day 6. The Return of Cast Member Hucifer
Part 1. When FastPass lines are longer than standby
Part 2. Conversations with myself
Part 3. When the Streetmosphere harass.
Part 4. Tower of Terror doesn't go upside down. Who knew?
Part 5. Hucifer the drunk.
Part 6. Why you should never leave me in a pool alone with your children
Day 7. The Expedition Everest Singles line: How I developed a love for all things single
Part 1. If it weren't for the millions of tour groups, this park would be empty
Part 2. Lone Ride Nazi Slays Entire Crowd Single-Handedly. Story at 11.
Part 2. What could be better than a plate of vegetarian lasagna?
Part 3. You met the worst of them, now heres one of the best
Part 4. Looking the fool taking pictures of yourself and your food
Day 8: Too much of a good thing
Part 1. Never berate a bear
Part 2. How to work Will Smith into your trip report
Part 3. Blue shorts and a blue funk
Part 4. Talker Tim vs. the very cantankerous caterpillar
Day 9: The Good-bye girl