WTH Plus size clothes for kids!?! vent

[Cindyluwho]

As far as this thread--I just can't see how it got so weird. Yes, the OP said "don't flame me" and that's probably because she knows that you cannot speak about weight on this board AT ALL. I swear she was just commenting on how much plus-size clothes have expanded for children. And it IS sad. And it is not ALL due to thyroid problems--please. I have had no thyroid for 10 years--I know about thyroid problems. Yes, there should be clothing for all sizes, but to see it take up a dedicated section in kidswear is scary.

Thank you Christine, for the support. I feel very passionately about children's issues and now I'm painted as if I hate children. Doesn't anyone else care what's best and right for the child him/herself? We are now living in a world where there are as many obese people as malnourished ones. This is not a matter of genetics or medical conditions, there's always been overweight folks but the percentage is much higher now. There are just more obese people now, especially in the US, than ever before.

 

[MissMinnie]

I'm going to risk adding in my 2 cents here. I was a child with a weight problem that started around age 2. I lived with both parents, a brother and a sister that had no weight problems ever. My mom was the cook and was very conscious of healthy eating. We ate very healthy in small to moderate portions. Sweets, fried things, etc were scarce. We only had dessert on holidays, birthdays, and other special occaisons and once in a blue moon we got candy as a treat. The kicker is I was the athletic one in the family. I was always running around, played sports in school (on the varsity teams too) and routinely ran about 2 miles a day in addition to team practices. My brother and sister were couch potatoes. My parents weren't lazy, but never worked out or anything. My sister was actually considered too thin and had to be bribed to eat more! How can you explain this? I was adopted and due to genetics (later found out a medical thing) I was different metabolically than the rest of my family!!! There was a good reason why I was bigger than the rest of the family! Due to something I could not control, I grew up hearing all the "pretty face" comments, people talking behind my back ( my own family too) and every other form of insult or pity you could think of. I would starve myself when in high school even though I was getting tons of exercise and I would still be in the 160 pound range. Being 5'10" it wasn't an extreme weight, but considering what I ate and the excercise, I should have been model thin. People still looked at me as a fat lazy kid in my size 16 clothes when they had no idea how I struggled to not gain weight!! People that did not know me made all sorts of assumptions based on my appearance only. Those who got to know me were shocked when they found out how little I was eating and how much exercise I got. Granted, not everyone has the same problem I had, but please do not judge the kids by size. Life is bad enough for them. If they can have an easier time in better clothes, so be it. And please stop judging the parents, too. There may be things they can change in their eating habits, but I'm sure those who do the judging would not like what people find upon examining their lifestyle (not just eating habits only either). I for one am so tired of so many people making it their business to point out other people's flaws. Please be supportive of each other, not tear each other down.

 

[chris1gill]

I can totally empathize with you OP.. our DD is VERY small in the waist, and she has long legs... for that matter, she has a long torso... it's almost impossible to find anything at all that actually fits her... She just turned 8. My best luck so far has been at Gymboree this year now that they go up to size 12 & have adjustable waist pants... The shirts.. my poor DD has to wear a size 9 or 10 shirt so that it fits in the torso.. inevitably it's too long on the sleeves... It's really impossible, and I refuse to buy anything at Limited Too!!! Now, I must say, my DD eats the worst food imagineable & tries to drink soda.... For the most part I shut the soda right down, but God she still eats terribly, but I do my best.....

The best part (well, not actually), my DS goes to karate 4 times a week, he's totally athletic & yet his waist does not reflect this... He's in for a lifetime of crunches if he wants the six pack abs... just the way it is for him.... His waist is really the only place he has any sort of excess weight, but I know that it bothers him... course he would be the kid that eats almost no junk food at all..... He's definitely not overweight, but it's just the oddest thing I have found between my two kids (this really doesn't have much to do with the original post, except to say my DD is like your DD LOL....)

 

[thelionqueen]

I just had to give my .02 worth.

1st of all, to the OP, I can see what you are trying to say. I agree that parents need to be responsible for what their children eat and the exercise they get...agreed.

What I emphatically disagree with is your generalizations of "fat people" and especially "fat kids" Now sure, there are going to be cases where the parents just don't do what they should nutritionally for their kids. But I believe, for the most part, there are usually underlying reasons for obesity on an individual basis. I don't think it's fair for anyone to assume people/kids just eat junk and eat too much and that's the reason they are fat.

I was overweight until I was 16 and it was miserable. I exercised, dieted, you name it I did it, nothing worked. Finally a nutritionist prescribed a slow metabolism as the culprit.

Then at 17, my metabolism sped up and I dropped 85 pounds in 8 months changing absolutely NOTHING that I had done up to that point. My diet stayed the same, my exercise stayed the same, nothing changed except my metabolism.

The bottom line I want to make is that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but please don't assume that fat people, kids or parents are slobs that "deserve what they get" it just isn't fair to generalize people that way.

BTW, beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. Keeping healthy is a responsibility everyone takes on individually. Let's look at someone for who they are, not what they look like. And what do you care if a store has a department for plus size kids? If you're not shopping there, what makes you even give a second thought?

I personally am glad they have plus sized clothes for kids. My son is a very slim 8 year old. He wears size 6 husky (should be a size 8 boys). They are the only size that fit. 7 is too big and 6 regular too short. Not everyone who wears a husky or plus size is fat, it also refers to fit.

I personally look at a person and don't see anything or form any opinions of them until I can talk to them and see who they are, not what they look like. Wish everyone would try this, I've met some AMAZING people who aren't a size 6.

 

[Miss Park Avenue]

But you should know that the plus sizes aren't really for obese kids. I have found, shopping for my younger daughter that the plus sizes are really for the ones you said you were not talking about. I often wonder, if I have so much trouble finding proper fitting clothes for my solid five year old. Where on earth are they finding clothes for the obese kids???

I have two daughters. I feed them both the same diet.

The older one is as thin as a rail. I buy her jeans at Gap in an 8slim and pull the elastic in. They cost around twenty to thirty dollars and sometimes you can find them 10 dollars off. I also found her Limited Too jeans in 8slim (two pairs at a resale shop...perfect shape for ten bucks) that she can wear if she wears a belt.

She is a DREAM to shop for. Clothes hang so beautiful on her and her drawers are stuffed. Pants are the hardest to find, but they are out there and that's nothing compared to what I have to go through to find clothes for the younger one.

The younger one is five and solid Her weight is in her tummy. I cannot find tops appropriate for a five year old girl in so called "young girls" departments like Sears or Penneys. I buy 98% of her tops from Gymboree because I can get little girls tops in a size eight or nine and she looks adorable. Most of her pants are stretchy, yoga type and I finally found a pair of 6plus on a clearance rack at Gap (for five bucks...I love the bargains!!) She hates them BTW...she's not used to wearing jeans. She is NOT fat.

People with naturally thin kids certainly cannot complain about how difficult it is to find "slim" clothes for their kids. I can look at both my girls' dressers and tell you who has been more difficult.

I'm very sensitive toward my younger daughter because it seems like she is surrounded by very small, thin girls, while she is solid and "off the charts" tall. Five years old and she has already told me that she wishes she didn't have a big tummy.

BTW...I took them to the DR for their well-child visit and asked the DR if she could tell me if I should worry about DD's weight. It can be hard to be objective when her sister is so thin. She took both their measurements and told me that her BMI is 23 and she doesn't even start to worry until she is 25 or over. BUT the older daughter has a BMI of 13 and if she was a teen, she would be considered anorexic. So I got a lot of advice on how to pack the calories into her meals.

So, maybe you look at my kids and think I'm doing everything right with the older one, and it's her diet I have to watch. That's why generalizations and judgments are hard to swallow.

 

[chobie]

My pediatrician once told me that "ideally" height and weight percentages should be equal, and even better if the weight percentage was a bit lower than the height percentage. When he sees a child where the weight percentile exceeds the height percentile and they are getting close to puberty, he does weight management couseling. Unfortunately, many pediatricians do not want to broach the weight subject with parents because, as you can see by this thread, people get very upset and often times cannot do anything about it. I'm not picking on you specifically or would even begin to say anything about your DD, just trying to point out that there is a LOT of conflicting information.

As far as this thread--I just can't see how it got so weird. Yes, the OP said "don't flame me" and that's probably because she knows that you cannot speak about weight on this board AT ALL. I swear she was just commenting on how much plus-size clothes have expanded for children. And it IS sad. And it is not ALL due to thyroid problems--please. I have had no thyroid for 10 years--I know about thyroid problems. Yes, there should be clothing for all sizes, but to see it take up a dedicated section in kidswear is scary.

A thread talking about what terrible parents other people are, is a fighting thread.

Its easy to pick on fat people because their "fault" is visable. Everybody has some fault or does something things wrong as a parent, but most of those things are not visable. I could think of worse things then having a chubby kid--being judgmental for one.

 

[MUFFYCAT]

I could think of worse things then having a chubby kid--being judgmental for one.

You're exactly right!
I have hard time trying to type the words on how I feel about this subject because of my experiences.

 

[jrmasm]

I didn't read all the responses but just want to add that I think sizing has changed since I was a child. I have a medium frame. I was never a stick child. My DD10 has the same build as me. I never wore husky sizes. She wears a half size. I dread the day that she realizes what that means.

Ironically, my half size child has very little body fat. The kid is solid. Her body is the result of genetics and a huge amount of time spent conditioning with a professional trainer. In fact when she played soccer last weekend in frigid conditions (temps in the 20s and windchills in the teens), it was the skinny kids that were out of breath, not her.

I truly fear that some day she may jeopardize her health because her incredibly athletic body will never be a size 2.

So you know what OP, call it a flame if you want, lets get our kids together on the field and see who's the one that's really in shape.

 

[Alicnwondrln]

sizing is different at every store you shop in
it is such a pain

 

[ducklite]

"Plus" sizes for kids have been around for at least 30 years. In boys they are called "husky" I can't recall what they are called in girls sizes.

And FYI, not all "husky" kids eat poorly or don't excercise. When my brother was 12, he was put on a medication for a chronic condition that caused his weight to balloon He had always been a slender kid until that point. He gained 30 pounds in six months. We were fed nutritious meals--fast food happened a few times a year at best--and we were always out playing in the neighborhood. I guess in your selfish opinion it would have been beter for him to die than to gain the weight associated with the medication?

Two years ago my son was also put on a medication that caused him to gain 20 pounds in two months. He had always been a slim size, finding pants with a waist to fit his 6' height was near impossible. He went from a size 28 waist to a 33 waist in two months. He had quite the bubba going. Once he was weaned off that medication it was time to buy all new pants again, because he dropped all the weight he had gained. The point is, sometimes it's not a sedentary life or bad diet that causes weight gain.

I'll be the first to admit that obesity is staggering in this country, and much of it is caused by sendentary lifestyle and poor nutrition, But not all of it. So unless someone is a doctor and know's an obese persons health history, they should just shut up and MYOB.

Anne

 

[BuzznBelle'smom]

I should probably know better than to jump in here, but here goes...

I just want to give a real-life example of just how far-reaching the consequences can be when you judge people by their size. My MIL (age 74) is a large woman. On her best day, she's 5'8" with very broad shoulders. She has struggled with her weight all her life, and in addition struggled with the comments from her own mother about being heavy. When DH was growing up, my MIL (who had 2 sons) spent many, many hours criticizing DH's slightly chubby female cousin. Then, it was on to the daughters-in-law, and their weights. Now, she is constantly commenting on the weight of her 5 granddaughters. And I mean constantly--when we visit her, she regulates every morsel of food you put in your mouth. She makes snide remarks about who eats what. She gets upset if you don't eat what she thinks you should. Ironically, she never says anything about DS, who is an eating machine. But all the girls hear are comments about their figures and what they should eat. In the "sort of good news" column, all her granddaughters are average or so weight (I can't say for sure about my nieces, they look fine to me, but I've never asked for details!). But the kind of judgemental attitude that the OP has can truly affect lives for decades. In fact, DH's (formerly chubby) cousin once told me that she was sooo glad that MIL never had girls, because they would be destined to be anorexic due to MIL's constant concern with the weight of others.

Bottom line, you can't know what makes everyone "tick". A little compassion goes a long way. Making judgements about others isn't healthy for anyone.

Now, pass over that popcorn, but only if it's got extra butter!

 

[LisaNJ25]

ok I am just going to be nice and hold my tounge on this one. I hope your kids never gain a few pounds.

 

[DarkSideMoon]

BTW-it also annoys me when I see young kids (6,7,8 years old) with Soda Pop. What are these parents thinking? Oh, and the pair of jeans that we found that finally fit my daughter?

You do realize that most 'healthy' meals have twice as many calories as a can of pop right? ( looks at previous posts and runs away from thread screaming )

 

[DarkSideMoon]

Also, I have to laugh at the contradictions in the madia.( intentionally misspelt) first it's ' Don't let your children play outside, they might get kidnapped ' then ' let your kids outside to play or your a horrble parent '.

 

[golfgal]

Around here they are 1/2 sizes, like 12 1/2. They have had them for years. I know my older sister wore them when we were young and she is in her 40's.

 

[Christine]

You do realize that most 'healthy' meals have twice as many calories as a can of pop right? ( looks at previous posts and runs away from thread screaming )

Kind of hoping a healthy meal has a few more nutrients than a can of soda.

 

[DarkSideMoon]

True. I had better get out of here before the thread dies in a fiery explosion of anger.

 

[mcnuss]

First of all, finding clothes that fit for any girl or woman is a life long agony. Let's be honest here. Whether you're fat, thin or in between, nothing ever fits right. The size 6 in one brand is a 12 in another, and then a size 8 the next time you go back to the first brand. Men have it easy with their clothes being sized by actual measurements.

As for obese children, we can rationalize "round bellies" and "solid" all we want, but at some point you have to directly ask your pediatrician: "Do we have need to be concerned with Prince or Princess's weight? because they will not broach the subject proactively until it is too late. They tend to take a "Don't ask, don't tell" approach. If I understand corrently, a child in the 95th percentile is heavier than 95% of the other children his or her age. I am not a doctor so I don't know if that's good bad or indifferent. You have to ask. Don't wait. It's a lot easier to get control of this at a young age. Further, you have to be a really savvy consumer and let go of all of American food myths, starting with milk. I have watched my nephews and my niece drink 2-3 glasses of milk with every meal. That's 125 calories per glass, let's say 6 glasses per day average, that's 750 calories per day. My sil does not understand why they're overweight bc they don't eat "bad" food. And she also doesn't understand why they don't have "good" appetites at meals! A typical child should eat about 2000-2500 calories per day. A particularly good exercise is to keep a food journal for your child (and us adults too!) to see where you stand. I did this recently for a nutritionist and was horrified by what I consumed in "healthy" foods!

Bottom line, food, weight, clothing sizes are all emotional (and lately, political) hot buttons. Let's be real - no parent is looking to cause a child to get fat! Who would want that guilt? But we all have to lower the volume on this issue so that we can take good care of our kids and ourselves.

 

[Christine]

Further, you have to be a really savvy consumer and let go of all of American food myths, starting with milk. I have watched my nephews and my niece drink 2-3 glasses of milk with every meal. That's 125 calories per glass, let's say 6 glasses per day average, that's 750 calories per day.

This is so true. I wish I could find the article I just read on milk--to include skim milk. That people are guzzling it down and, even in its skim form, packs on a lot of calories.

 

[jrmasm]

So any child that doesn't resemble a stick should see a dietician? Seriously? That's craziness. I'm not saying that there aren't plenty of overweight children. There are. I see them. But children are born with with different frame sizes that affect what size they wear. That is fact.

So the blanket assumption by the OP that all children that wear these sizes are in need of medical intervention is ill informed and well, silly.