Would you offer to cut a female neighbour's grass?

[Skywalker]

I have a friend who lives on about an acre and a half. She has been single in the house since she divorced last summer. Her riding lawn mower has not worked this summer, so she has been cutting it with just a regular push mower.

She is ticked off because all of her neighbours have riding mowers, and she thinks it is extremely rude of them to watch her suffer cutting all that grass and thinks they or their teenage sons should offer to cut her grass.

And, the part that makes me laugh is she thinks probably the men want to help her out but the wives are probably jealous. Yeah, there are probably heated arguments all over the neighbourhood with husbands dying to get out there and cut her grass.

Personally I could see offering to help an elderly or sick neighbour, but just because she's a "single woman"?

 

[CajunDixie]

If she's so upset why doesn't she simply ask to borrow one of the neighbors riding mowers. Maybe the men just enjoy her working within thier veiw.

 

[MerMom60_94]

As a woman, I am offended by her notion. If she didn't know how to run the mower, it would be nice of someone to offer to show her how. From the sounds of things, she knows how to mow but feels as though a woman is "too delicate" for such work. I think she ought to suck it up or move to a condo if she can't handle maintenance of her home and her property. Does she run around cooking, mending, and doing laundry for all the single men? After all, tradition says that's women's work......... Thank God for broken traditions!

 

[TinkInPink]

Umm if she hates doing it so much why doesn't she give one of the teenagers 10 bucks to do it? If she's mowing the lawn regularly and with minimal issues the neighbors probably don't think twice about it.. I know if I saw one of my neighbors mowing their lawn my first thought wouldn't be "I wonder if they can't mow their lawn themselves.."

 

[kaytieeldr]

It'd probably cost her more than $10 but that's an EXCELLENT suggestion, TinkInPink.

 

[OceanAnnie]

No, I wouldn't offer to cut a neighbor's (either gender) grass unless they were infirm or there was a dire condition. It opens a can of worms. Who pays for gas? Is it a once and awhile thing or forever? Will it be expected on a schedule if it is ongoing? It has the potential for lots of expectations tied to it.

I think the woman has a lot of nerve. One thing to be jealous, it's a different story to sound off and put feelers out to get what she wants. She sounds like someone I would steer away from.

 

[MariDisney]

When I was recently separated with a not yet two year old, the one task I really had a terrible time with was mowing the lawn. I had never done it, and I was scared sick of the lawn mower. Part of our property was also a steep hill that needed mowing. I also did not have a riding mower. I was never ticked that no one offered to help, because no one owes me that. I would, however, have been incredibily grateful if someone had. It would take me a couple hours, and I would cry the entire time. Having that taken away would have been a great gift to me.

 

[TinkInPink]

It'd probably cost her more than $10 but that's an EXCELLENT suggestion, TinkInPink.

lol Thank you. I was thinking since the teens have riding mowers it wouldn't take much effort.. but you're right the going rate is probably higher, but then again they are teen guys

 

[HsvTeacher]

I could see helping out if she was elderly or too sick to do it. However, it sounds like she just wants a free ride because she's a "lady," or she's just too lazy to do it herself.

My DH often helps out the sweet, old lady across the street, because there are some places she can't get to with her ride-on mower. But that lady is out at least once a week, if not more, mowing her yard, and she has to be close to 80 years old. If she can do it, surely your neighbor can!

 

[MariDisney]

If she's so upset why doesn't she simply ask to borrow one of the neighbors riding mowers. Maybe the men just enjoy her working within thier veiw.

As a woman, I am offended by her notion. If she didn't know how to run the mower, it would be nice of someone to offer to show her how. From the sounds of things, she knows how to mow but feels as though a woman is "too delicate" for such work. I think she ought to suck it up or move to a condo if she can't handle maintenance of her home and her property. Does she run around cooking, mending, and doing laundry for all the single men? After all, tradition says that's women's work......... Thank God for broken traditions!

For me life was so crazy and upside down for a few months that I almost couldn't just do it. I am a big "suck it up" person, but for a bit it was so incredibly hard. I certainly didn't think I was too delicate, and I indeed mowed that lawn. Did I run around cooking and cleaning for others? No, but I would have if I felt someone had a need. And now, yes I do when there is a need.

Umm if she hates doing it so much why doesn't she give one of the teenagers 10 bucks to do it? If she's mowing the lawn regularly and with minimal issues the neighbors probably don't think twice about it.. I know if I saw one of my neighbors mowing their lawn my first thought wouldn't be "I wonder if they can't mow their lawn themselves.."

I didn't have $10 when I was newly separated.

 

[MM27]

I hate when women feel they are owed something just because they are women.

 

[JR6ooo4]

I have the exact same problem...

all my neighbors have high paying jobs and pay their mortgages easily. My profession is really struggling and no one has offered to pay my mortgage! Hehehehehehe

Mikeeee

 

[KandD]

When my parents first seperated I was about 16, it was just my mom, my sister, and I in the house and I mowed the lawn but then the lawn mower broke and none of us had any idea how to fix it. I think one of the neighbors was outside when we were talking about the broken mower because I came home from school one day and it was mowed!

My dad lives in a co-op that is attached to other co-ops and when my boyfriend goes over to mow my dad's lawn he mows his neighbor's lawn too (he is an elderly gentleman with heart problems). And one day another neighbor saw my bf mowing the lawns and asked him if he could do theirs as well. They offered to pay him but he did it for free. (The lawns are teeny tiny).

But as a woman I would never EXPECT someone to mow the lawn for me. She really should just hire a landscaper or a local teenager to cut the grass if she is having such a hard time.

 

[DebbieB]

I would not expect someone to just come do it. I would offer to pay someone. I travel alot and in the winter I ask one of the neighbor's boys to shovel the walk when I'm away. I usually give him $20 (small area).

 

[KathyTX]

The woman has several options:

• Get her riding mower fixed.
  
• Pay someone to mow her lawn.
  
• Move to a place where the yard is small enough that she can handle the maintenance more easily.

Expecting someone to just step and take care of her is just over the top!

 

[torinsmom]

I am a single mom and I cut my grass or DS14 does it. I would never expect someone else to cut it for me unless I paid them. Maybe one of the teens should go and offer their services and make some money off the opportunity. The going rate is $20 here even for a small yard. Before my son was old enough, I did pay someone once or twice when I was not feeling well.

Marsha

 

[sunnyday123]

Tell her to suck it up, she's giving divorced women a bad rap.

And then tell her it could be worse, she could have a quarter acre she has to cut with a weed whacker. My hands were numb for three days, but I was prouder of that then anything else.

And after I got my riding mower, I cut my neighbors lawns!

 

[mfd25wife]

We have some wonderful neighbors that have come to help with the lawn at times. DH is sometimes sent by FEMA to places for indefinite amounts of time. Since he only gets 4 hours notice, sometimes the yard needs help before he gets home. The neighbors have come and mowed ours (it's an acre) when they are mowing their own. Recently, we've had a bit of bad fortune in that while we were on our WDW vacation, we totalled a vehicle and I received some injuries rendering me slightly above useless for a while. DH is in process of adding onto house. Neighbors came and mowed a couple of times. A dear friend came and cleaned my living room and kitchen even though I have a DH and a DD. She just knows me and knows they don't clean like I like it. I was so appreciative. DH would probably help a female neighbor in the beginning, but he would probably loan her the mower like we do our friends when they need it.

Should the neighbor be mad? I wouldn't think so, but it would be nice if someone loaned her a mower as long as she bought the gas.

 

[ctinct]

Single mom here for almost 16 years. I certainly would never have expected any of my neighbors to offer to mow my lawn. I would have loved it, though, if a friend or two had offered. If I ever am aware of a neighbor or friend who needs this help, I wouldn't hesitate to offer. Been there, done that.

When I first became a single mom, I had a one year old, a ten year old son, and a 15 yr. old daughter. It was difficult to find the time to do the lawn. I wouldn't let my son do it till he was older. I never would have been able to afford to pay anyone even $10-it was a challenge just to keep us afloat. In fact, when my power mower broke, all I could afford to buy was an old fashioned rotary non-power push mower. Bet most of you didn't even know they still make them. That was an incredible pain in the neck-took forever to do the lawn, and it's not that big. I scraped up the money the next year for a power mower. Anyhow, I now get a perverse pleasure from doing it myself. Kind of "I am woman, hear me roar", kwim? My grown son comes over about once a week intending to help me out by mowing my lawn, but only once has he been able to catch it when it needed it. Last week he washed my car for me, instead. Gotta love that boy.

Anyhow, I feel for your friend in that I know during those early years I sometimes craved someone taking care of ME for a change, instead of me handling everything myself. Did I cry sometimes? Heck, yeah, in the shower at night so the kids couldn't hear me. But, I put on my big girl panties and handled it. Never would I EXCEPT someone to offer to help just because I am a single mom, but it sure would have been nice. OTOH, now that I am almost done raising my children (youngest is almost 16), I can look back and am incredibly proud of myself that I made it through and was able to raise three great kids. Think your friend might just be feeling a little bit sorry for herself, and that's allowed.

 

[Nennie]

When I was single, I had a townhouse with a small lawn. I had never mowed a lawn before, so I bought an electric push mower and tried to do it myself. I must have done a really bad job, b/c the next day my neighbor told me he would be more than happy to mow my lawn when he mowed his own lawn. I thought this was so very nice, and agreed with my thanks.

After about a year, I told my neighbor I was going to hire a lawn service to mow, and he talked me out of it, and said he liked doing it b/c that way our lawns matched, etc, and he liked doing yard work anyway. I lived there for 3 years until I got married, and in fact I sold that home to another single woman and I let her know about the nice neighbor! I wouldn't be surprised if he still mows that lawn for her!

BTW - He wasn't hitting on me, trying to date me or anything like that! He was just a really nice guy. I would make him cookies or brownies once in a while too, just to be nice.

OF COURSE, I would never expect anyone to take care of the lawn for me! That's just crazy!!! If he had never offered, I would have continued chopping away at it myself, or just hired a lawn service!