Would you leave your 13 year old home alone...

[Luv'sTink]

Thanks everyone...I didn't think I was being over protective. When my Mom told me that I was like...Is she nuts??? She however let her 15 year old daughter stay home, while they went camping, with her boyfriend yea, I know.

 

[disykat]

No way. My neighbors asked my then 13 yr old to pet sit and were really surprised when I said he could go over often, for as long as they wanted, during the day but I didn't want him sleeping over there. They wouldn't leave their dog overnight alone, but couldn't understand why I wouldn't let my son be there alone. I thought that was weird.

I'm also with those who say 16 or 17 and driving for an overnight alone. I have to say though, I probably wouldn't leave any teen younger than 18 for more than one night, maybe two. If I was going to be gone longer I would want them staying with friends or relatives.

My kids are 17 and 15 now and I think I'd feel okay leaving overnight, (I haven't done it yet) but I really feel it's still my job to "take care of them" and I just wouldn't feel good about leaving them to fend for themselves even though they're perfectly capable. It just seems like it would be lonely/weird for them.

 

[WebmasterMaryJo]

Leaving alone overnight? No, I don't think it's a good idea, especially when there are family members available to stay.

 

[Starbrite]

I leave DS13 for hours during the day. I've even come home as late as 10pm & he's been fine. We have alot of family & friends within walking distance, so he would have several places to go if he wanted.

But I would still never leave him overnight. Not yet, maybe in 2 or 3 years. But still not for a whole weekend.

 

[Colleen27]

No way! My 12yo stays home while I do the grocery shopping or other in-town errands, but that's about the limit of our comfort zone. I took my girls to a movie without him a few months ago and I wasn't home until after dark (probably 7ish, but it was winter); I came home to him watching TV with every light on the main floor on and our dog in his lap. If that made him nervous at almost-12, I don't see him being any more comfortable than I would with leaving him overnight at 13!

 

[Secret Agent Woman]

I stayed home 'alone' babysitting five younger kids when I was twelve - for, as above, a few hours at a time. I think the first time my parents left us 'alone' while they went on a trip, I was sixteen or seventeen - but there were ALWAYS neighbors on whom to call in case of emergency. And when I say "call", I mean 'lean out the window and yell HELP'. I know I was a senior in high school, and I know 100% they went to Las Vegas.

Seventeen. Winter. I remember now, it took me until about 9 PM to realize the oil tank was empty, and the guy from the oil company yelled at me for not calling earlier in the day.

 

[Mrs. Charming]

Oh heck no.

 

[PatsGirl]

Not a chance. Not that I have to worry about it though, DD13 will not stay home past dusk by herself yet and yes, it's driving me crazy, lol...

 

[LuvOrlando]

No I wouldn't, no way. Not only that but considering the fact your sister had you watch her kid I don't think she feels that way either. What I do think is that your sister is resentful she was inconvenienced by watching your child. If this happened to me I would not ask her to watch my child in the future for such things because resentments show up in spite of people's attempts to squelch them... they show in little things like what she said to your Mom and heaven knows what sort of digs she said to your son while watching him, I'm sure there was a great deal said and implied. If you do need to go away I would suggest you let your DS sleep over your Mom's house or a friend's. Maybe he won't be as comfortable but he would be safe, and with someone who probably wants him. Don't think of this as "She owes me" think of it as keeping your kid away from someone who is bitter.

I wish I knew why people are like this with kids, personally I think it's ugly. My in-laws are big on saying "Been there done that" and telling me why I don't need to take the care I do with my kids and I CAN'T STAND IT. It's disrespectful to me and I KNOW they don't mean it because of how they treated their own kids. What they REALLY mean is, "No, I can't be bothered". Instead of looking to them, I go with friends who have kids my kids ages. Maybe they aren't family but who said family is better anyway?

 

[bigbabyblues]

Absolutely not.

 

[ugadog99]

At 13? No way! Heck, I'm having a difficult time deciding to let my 16 year old stay home while her and sister and I go to WDW in July. She will be here by herself during the day, but I'm having one of older daughter's friends (18) come spend the night here while we are gone. There are plenty of neighbors who will be around, but I just can't let her stay the night by herself. (She isn't going to Disney because she is leaving on August 3 for 2 weeks in England/Scotland with her drama group.)

 

[Binnie]

No way.

My mother left me alone to go to her high school reunion at that age, and it wasn't cool.

No matter how self-motivated and self-assured your 13 year old is, s/he is still 13 and a kid and needs someone there for her/him.

 

[5lilfish]

My son is turning 13 on Tuesday. I am not the over-protective type....but there is no way I would leave my son home alone overnight. We do leave him home for a couple hours at a time (day or night). We have our cell phones and he is comfortable being alone. I can't imagine leaving him while I went out of town.

Jess

 

[Planogirl]

I wouldn't have left my 13 year old alone overnight and he was quite responsible. That's a heavy load to put on a young kid.

 

[clh2]

Mom of a 16 YO DD here. DD is super responsible. She is very samrt, and has a lot of common sense. she has been coming home alone after school since she was 9 years old. She has been home alone during the summers since she was 11. And no, DH and I do not work close by ( we are each ~45 minutes away).

DH and I are also fairly permissive about her activities and what not. Now that she is driving, while still permissive about her going places, we are very specific about where she is, who she is driving, when she gets places and leaves places she needs to text us etc. (She has had her license 1 month).

DH and I are going on a mini-vaction to vegas in the fall, and we will NOT be leaving DD alone. We are having a college-aged aquaintence of ours not necessarily baby-sitting, but at least keeping an eye on things...and making sure she is awake in the morning. DD isn't happy about that...but OH WELL. I might feel differently if we were only going for a night, and on a weekend, but we are leaving on a Sunday and coming home on Wednesday.

 

[MichelleVW]

I can't remember, but honestly I think I did leave DD19 home alone at 13. We were only 2 hours away, we lived on an Air Force base and I had neighbors/friends on the lookout for her and she knew who to call if she needed something.

 

[floridascgirl]

Is it even legal?

 

[themilesfamily]

No. Absolutely not.

ETA: Perhaps it's a compliment to your son that your sis thought he was mature enough to make it on his own for three days. But mature or not, 13 still seems too young.

 

[nmmom95]

I have a 12 year old and I think that 13 is way too young to be home alone overnight. Back in the Stone Age, when I was young, my parents didn't leave us (I have a younger sister) overnight until I could drive.

 

[minkydog]

So, would you leave your 13 year old home alone, while you took a mini vacation?

Absolutely not! What is she thinking? Is that even legal in your state? I would leave a 16-17yo for 3 days, assuming that they are trustworthy and I have lots of supports in place, but never a 13yo CHILD. Would a 13yo know what to do if the plumbing malfunctioned and spewed sewage onto the floor? Would he know what to do if he had a fever or got stung by a bee? Would a 13yo be capable of managing a power outage or broken pipe? Could he be trusted not to set the microwave on fire? I don't even want to think about a major crisis!