when you live with a non planner

[DisneyMama811]

our trip is in 6 days... our first park day is in 7 days .. I've been planning this trip for a year.... yesterday my husband says to me... "so what ride do you want to start with? we can just wing it right? $50 a day for food should be good right?"

I'm just gonna take my planning binder and spread sheets with my colour coded dining plan and cry in the corner now

 

[thanxfornoticin]

If I had ignored my opportunities to help plan well in advance, and then came in a week before the trip to add 'recommendations' and ideas, I would be handed the spreadsheet and shown where I was going to be on what days and ignored at that point. I'm sure I would be told I would have a choice of my own entrees at dinner - but not much else this close to arrival!! Hope you have an stress-free fun trip!

 

[DisneyMama811]

If I had ignored my opportunities to help plan well in advance, and then came in a week before the trip to add 'recommendations' and ideas, I would be handed the spreadsheet and shown where I was going to be on what days and ignored at that point. I'm sure I would be told I would have a choice of my own entrees at dinner - but not much else this close to arrival!! Hope you have an stress-free fun trip!

haha yep I basically told him "look you should have showed some interest 3 months ago if you wanted input, here's our itinerary, study it"

 

[1420Elexismc]

My husband knows to just go with whatever I plan at this point lol...the only thing he said was "Hibachi"...just like that...one word...and walked away

 

[thanxfornoticin]

My husband knows to just go with whatever I plan at this point lol...the only thing he said was "Hibachi"...just like that...one word...and walked away

Does that translate to Teppan Ido??!!

 

[1420Elexismc]

Does that translate to Teppan Ido??!!

Yes LOL...you learn to decipher their language after a while

 

[jsmla]

My Spouse on our early September trip


January “Whatever, I don’t care”

April “We’re going to Disney? Again? When did you do that?”

July “I don’t care where we eat.”

September, noonish, while we’re standing in line at the Animal Kingdom, “I know, let’s go over to Epcot, ride Guardians of the Galaxy and have lunch at Space 220.”

 

[dez1978]

I am the only planner in a group of 8. It drives me absolutely batty!!!

 

[DisneyMama811]

My Spouse on our early September trip


January “Whatever, I don’t care”

April “We’re going to Disney? Again? When did you do that?”

July “I don’t care where we eat.”

September, noonish, while we’re standing in line at the Animal Kingdom, “I know, let’s go over to Epcot, ride Guardians of the Galaxy and have lunch at Space 220.”

are we married to the same person

 

[1420Elexismc]

I am the only planner in a group of 8. It drives me absolutely batty!!!

There are 13 of us going on our next trip....I am only planning for the 3 of us with the exception of one meal we want to eat together-I am all set...I did it for everyone last time(11 of us) and just about lost my mind-never again lol

 

[Titanium]

our trip is in 6 days... our first park day is in 7 days .. I've been planning this trip for a year.... yesterday my husband says to me... "so what ride do you want to start with? we can just wing it right? $50 a day for food should be good right?"

I'm just gonna take my planning binder and spread sheets with my colour coded dining plan and cry in the corner now

In the business world silence implies consent (so said a former CFO) so I use that approach when planning a WDW trip. I mention what restaurants I'm looking at and what parks are available and the comment line is always open and the itinerary is in MDE. On the other hand we are lucky to have similar tastes and a high trust level. Since we're self employed we tend to plan at the last minute when we can get a hotel discount so much of the time ADRs are slim pickings.

 

[Titanium]

If I had ignored my opportunities to help plan well in advance, and then came in a week before the trip to add 'recommendations' and ideas, I would be handed the spreadsheet and shown where I was going to be on what days and ignored at that point. I'm sure I would be told I would have a choice of my own entrees at dinner - but not much else this close to arrival!! Hope you have an stress-free fun trip!

I'm tucking that "you'll have a choice of entree" comment away for for future reference

 

[Titanium]

September, noonish, while we’re standing in line at the Animal Kingdom, “I know, let’s go over to Epcot, ride Guardians of the Galaxy and have lunch at Space 220.”

O.M.G. I laughed out loud, we are married to the same person. After park hopping from EPCOT to MK Christmas Eve the DH says..... "I want to get my Star Wars groove on".

 

[DisneyMama811]

it gets better... I've planned out our HS days and now DH tells me he'd like to ride RotR "just to be able to say he did"

 

[Boopuff]

My DD and I are the "binders, spreadsheet, reservations" people. Everyone else in the family goes with the flow (except for my younger DD she worked for WDW and never wants to follow the plans!) My DH will usually ask a week or so before the trip "did you book my golf? I want to go at least 3 times" me "Done and Done!"

 

[disneyseniors]

I sympathize with the previous comments.
I have always been the planner for vacations. I make the arrangements, do the packing, take care of holding mail, cancelling things, etc. All of it.
I don't mind, so I must be a little crazy? I like knowing all the details of what and where and how. I like knowing that I packed my husbands clothes. If I left the packing to him he would pack a few pairs of undies and one shirt!!!!
I start planning a month in advance; IE; putting clothes out to pick from later, making lists of to do's and to pack, and reviewing our resort/hotel plans.
We are one month out from a trip to Universal and I am starting this routine.
Maybe I'm a control freak, but I really do like to do the planning.

 

[nw6675]

I am a type A planner for sure. Have my spreadsheet down to even include tax and tips! I would always tell DH my plans and all the changes.

His eyes would glaze over and he'd say ok.

Finally asked if he cared. With eyes glazed over he'd sai '- no. You always change anyway. Just tell me where to go.

 

[DisneyMama811]

I sympathize with the previous comments.
I have always been the planner for vacations. I make the arrangements, do the packing, take care of holding mail, cancelling things, etc. All of it.
I don't mind, so I must be a little crazy? I like knowing all the details of what and where and how. I like knowing that I packed my husbands clothes. If I left the packing to him he would pack a few pairs of undies and one shirt!!!!
I start planning a month in advance; IE; putting clothes out to pick from later, making lists of to do's and to pack, and reviewing our resort/hotel plans.
We are one month out from a trip to Universal and I am starting this routine.
Maybe I'm a control freak, but I really do like to do the planning.

12 years ago DH and I went on our first trip together (just dating at the time) we were going to a water spa 4 hours from our town, 3 hours into the drive he realizes he didn't pack his swimsuit... I've done all the packing ever since hahaha

 

[disneyseniors]

12 years ago DH and I went on our first trip together (just dating at the time) we were going to a water spa 4 hours from our town, 3 hours into the drive he realizes he didn't pack his swimsuit... I've done all the packing ever since hahaha

LOL, I know what you mean. My husband thinks packing is a shirt, a few undies, that's it.
That's why I've done all the planning
Or maybe he's smarter than me and planned it that way?????

 

[coasternut22]

I'm a hardcore planner and have always been. We usually go with the MIL. For our first Disneyland trip with the kids, wife didn't want to plan anything. Just go with the flow. During the trip, I said "we could be doing this or doing that" or "should we book a fastpass for this or that in anticipation of what's going on?" I made it clear that I wanted one evening just the two of us while MIL watched the kids. When it came to that point, MIL said no, I'm tagging along with you. So upset. Forgive me for expressing my wants before the trip, trying to set expectations so that there are no arguments. I should have been clearer or gotten express agreement. Lesson learned.

For our very first WDW trip, I planned every second. Wife and MIL didn't like it. Said it was too stressful. However, on one particular day that trip, I had no plan. When wife and MIL asked what we were doing, I said I had no plan. I said it's your day, you can plan what you want. They didn't know what to do, because, well, they didn't do any research. The resentment was overwhelming that day. How dare I put some of the responsibility on others as to what we do that day.

Over the years, it's worked out though. I've gotten very very good at planning for the unplanned. I think that's where my (and a good planner in general) strengths lie. It's not, can you get everything done, but can you get your plan in when something goes wrong or needs to change? I always build in break time, slower walking speed, rides breaking down, transportation issues, weather into my plans. I scenario build and always have backup plans. What happens when someone is tired, or sick, or doesn't want to do something? How married am I to this restaurant reservation, or can I let it go because we just are not feeling it? If we have energy, we can do X, Y, & Z. If we don't have energy, we'll just settle for Z. I also make sure I get 100% agreement on everything? Do we all agree to get to the bus stop by 7am? Do we agree to have MIL watch the kids for these rides? Etc. If I don't get agreement, I have to be prepared to make decisions on the fly and communicate the consequences of our decisions.

It was dicey the first couple of trips, but we all have a good system now.