When buying presents do you try to keep it an even amount?

[Dee77]

Do you consider the relationship with the person, their age or another factor as being a possible reason for spending more money on one relative over others or do you generally try to keep things even within families? If you do, does it matter to you if eveyone opens their presents together and can see what everyone gets eachother?

If you are married, do you try to keep things even on both sides?

Also-

If you are the parent of one child but have siblings that have more than one, do you feel that they should spend a little more on your child since you have more kids to buy for in their family?

 

[redlight]

Not really, but I'm not a parent so I don't feel like I have to equalize.

 

[*JoGo*]

we set a flexible budget. usually our moms get a little more spent on them. but i do try to keep it kind of even w/ my mom & stepdad.... i don't want her opening a dozen gifts, and him just one or two.

this year we have a new baby in the family, my first niece (the "baby" has been my 8yr old son), so my boys and i got a little excited and spent a little over the budget on her.

as for the different sides of the family, we have xmas w/ them at separate times, but have the same budget for everyone.

my boys is where i try to keep the amount of gifts close to even. not exact, but close. as they get older and mature, that will change - when they start asking for expensive things, we'll stick more to the budget rather than the amount of gifts. but while they're young, we aren't going to spend all of the budget on only 2 things for one child and a dozen for the other, even if the monetary value is the same. it's hard for kids to look past the number of gifts and realize they got the same "value".

 

[minniecarousel]

I used to take great pains in making sure my boys got the same amount of presents, and I tried to spend the same amount of $$.

Now that they're adults and married, I try to spend the same amount on each of them and their wives. It's all on me - they don't care.

My brother has 13 year-old triplets and I spend the same amount on each of them, even though one is my Godson. (actually, they now get cash)

With my siblings, we draw names & buy only one present - so that's easy. We can buy anyone "stocking stuffers".

Over the years, I have spent the same amount on each kid, regardless of how many kids are in the family.

 

[BroganMc]

I'm in a bit of a strange situation. My mom was big into the "keep everything equal" camp of gift giving, especially for kids. When she became a grandma that naturally carried over.

But she died 6 years ago and I was sort of entrusted to carry on a lot of her activities. I live with and look after my dad (the sole grandpa of the family now). I organize and host the family Christmas gathering. And since my dad is rubbish at Christmas shopping I do the majority of the present buying/gathering. Usually at my expense since it is just easier for me to do the charging to my card and I hate having to verify every purchase with another. If it can fit in my budget then it's ok. My dad does pay for the things we buy together, but if it is online shopping usually it's all me.

So I have the situation of being the aunt but providing most of the "grandparent" gifts. I tried to follow my mom's more rigid rules on balance in number of presents. It's not my thing. Often times I know what one child would like but have absolutely no idea for another. And each kid has another two sets of aunts/uncles gifting them (more when you're talking their in-law parent side of the family).

I threw out my mom's rulebook and now just try to find something for each child I think they'd appreciate. Sometimes it means one child gets a little bit more from me a year because it just works out that way. I happen to know what they'd like and I enjoy gifting them.

I truly hate it when people compare the number of gifts they get or monetary value. The true spirit of giving is that you receive one thing that has great meaning to you and you give something that has great meaning.

As for me and my dad, neither of us are looking for presents more than just time spent with our family over the holidays. We do a lot to make our home inviting and special. We look forward to seeing all the kids and hanging with my siblings.

One of the fondest memories I have as a kid is when my dad made us string out our present opening for hours until our grandma was awake and joined us. My grandma always joined us Christmas Eve for the night and we'd have my aunt over the next day. We listened to Christmas carols and gazed at all those presents under the tree. It didn't matter how many one person received or the value. It was the combined amount that showed how much love and consideration we had as a family for each other.

 

[shortbun]

I came from the land of nothing need be equal. My parents operated on the premise that it would all equal out in the end. We never even discussed who got the best gifts or if we had been treated equally. Fast Forward to my MIL. I remember my first Christmas as a family member-gift were counted and monetary value was evened out with a little cash-I'm talking down to the penny. Craziness! She even wraps each person's gifts in separate paper so she knows who's is who's. We all open one at a time and are required to display each gift for all to see. It's tedious. I love her but she's nuts about stuff like this. Life has so many facets, I don't see the purpose putting these kinds of control issues into gift giving. Stressful and certainly an anxiety builder.