What would you do?

[Hannathy]

"Boys argue and get over it. Some girls in my daughter's class had a disagreement in kindergarten and are still upset---in the seventh grade!!"

That is so true rie'smom! Unfortunately with girls you will have many more parties she isn't invited to and many times the little brats will rub it in. At least she is young enough to probably not know about it or find out. Just wait till she is 5 or 7 and it happens. Sorry but you can't control others although I'll never understand why some parents can be so cruel.

 

[Disney Doll]

I wouldn't do anything.

If the invite was lost in the mail, eventually someone will say "Hey, you weren't at Susie's birthday,...what happened?" and you can say "we never gor an invite" at which point someone will say "everyone in the neighborhood got invited. I am sure you got one" at which point you can say "well, it never made it to the house...oh well" and you'll know it was an oversight or lost in the mail or whatever.

If they didn't invite you on purpose, why would you want to play into that by letting them know you are upset?

As far as selling your house....if this little thing is making you think of selling, you either have had multiple bad experiences in this neighborhood with these neighbors and this is "the straw that broke the camel's back" or you have to develop a thicker skin.

 

[DisneyMommyMichelle]

It is not your place to "get to the bottom of it". She wasn't invited, plain and simple. She's 3, there's no reason to even discuss it with her. Forget about it.

i would have to say the same thing. Just move along and i'm sure your DD had a blast tonite where she is at.

 

[Aidensmom]

When my son was in Pre-K last year, a little girl in his class had a party. It was the rule at that school that if invitations were issued in the school, all of the class had to receive one. For this particular party, the parents paperclipped the invitations to the sign in/sign out book on each child's page. My child's page was the last page in the book. All the others had invitations, his did not.

I didn't say anything. Fast forward a few months later, our families attended several things together and we all get along great. Party has never been mentioned, nor remembered by either child, and everyone, parents and children, are friends.

My point is that this stuff isn't really that terrible important in the overall scheme of things, though it can be very hurtful at the time. Just let it pass.

 

[momrek06]

My child's page was the last page in the book. All the others had invitations, his did not.

OT: Did you ever find out if this was an oversight? Esp where the rule was in place re: invitations???

 

[Aidensmom]

OT: Did you ever find out if this was an oversight? Esp where the rule was in place re: invitations???

No. I didn't see the point in making an issue of it. The kids were friends, and happy, and that is all that matters to me.

 

[momrek06]

No. I didn't see the point in making an issue of it. The kids were friends, and happy, and that is all that matters to me.

Ahhh...you have a great personality!! I give you so much credit!! I used to get so "emontional" when my kids were little and things like that happened and yet THEY were FINE and I was the one acting like an idiot wishing I could just "let it go"!!!!

 

[Aidensmom]

Ahhh...you have a great personality!! I give you so much credit!! I used to get so "emontional" when my kids were little and things like that happened and yet THEY were FINE and I was the one acting like an idiot wishing I could just "let it go"!!!!

I'm not saying it didn't bother me! I just have learned to pick my battles I guess.

 

[LindsayDunn228]

It is not your place to "get to the bottom of it". She wasn't invited, plain and simple. She's 3, there's no reason to even discuss it with her. Forget about it.

I have to agree with you.

 

[dg39]

I wouldn't do anything... Unfortunately this may be one of many "hurts" your dd will feel during the loooooong years of growing up. Maybe the invite did get lost in the mail. But, whatever the reason I wouldn't say anything or do anything about it. If by chance you hear through the grapevine that your dd was indeed invited and just didn't attend, then, I would mention it to the mom, but, other then that I would just drop it. I would be hurt and kind of put out, but, I'd keep those feelings to myself.

 

[DisneyMommyMichelle]

Aidensmom you have a great attitude!!

 

[juligrl]

Thank you all for your input. After having had a couple of days to mull it over DH and I have decided to let it go. There are so many kids in this neighborhood that DD plays with that it just doesn't make sence to go stirring up any trouble .

This whole thing was just an appropriate end to a generally yucky week so it probably bothered us more than it should have. A little bit of "retail therapy" (Christmas shopping for DD of course) and time have given us a little time to calm down some. Sometimes we still feel so new at this parenting thing!

 

[Sherri]

One of the 2 year olds is an only, the other has a baby sister.

It's not that I think she was treated unfairly, it's just we see these people every day (or almost every day) and it couldn't just be an oversight. I mean DH was just down helping them aerate their yard this past weekend.

I think it was an oversight or miscommunication.
Maybe the mother of child thought she had mentioned it to you and forgot who she had told and before you know it it was an oversight.
I would not feel like they think of you as not good enough for their neighborhood or they wouldn't encourage their little girl to play with your little girl.

 

[goofinoff]

I wouldn't do anything.

If the invite was lost in the mail, eventually someone will say "Hey, you weren't at Susie's birthday,...what happened?" and you can say "we never gor an invite" at which point someone will say "everyone in the neighborhood got invited. I am sure you got one" at which point you can say "well, it never made it to the house...oh well" and you'll know it was an oversight or lost in the mail or whatever.

If they didn't invite you on purpose, why would you want to play into that by letting them know you are upset?

As far as selling your house....if this little thing is making you think of selling, you either have had multiple bad experiences in this neighborhood with these neighbors and this is "the straw that broke the camel's back" or you have to develop a thicker skin.

i totally agree! Let it go and see what happens. I think another poster mentioned having a party (halloween, christmas etc0 and inviting them. Great idea. Don't snub them because you feel like you were snubbed. But DON'T buy the kid a gift to make a point. That is totally sending the wrong message! If it turns out that the invitation was indeed lost, why not invite the kid and the mom over for a "private" birthday celebration. Make cupcakes or something and have your dd give her the gift. I'm sure it will be fine. Don't sell your house because your dd wasn't invited to a silly party! If you continue to do that, you'll be moving every year!!
Good luck! Keep us posted!