What Would You Do? Work is trying to ruin my Disney vacation!

[springandmac]

So I planned a 5 day vacation for my DD20 and I to celebrate her 21st birthday. I'm a DVC member and I patiently waited for the 7 month window to snag BCV in a 1 bedroom. I put in my PTO request, and it was approved. I used some Southwest credits and some Rapid Rewards Points and booked our airfare the day they opened the booking up for our dates. As a bonus it was on sale.

Fast forward to today....I get an email from the Chief Administrative Officer at the medical practice that I work at telling me that me and one of my co-workers are going to a accounting conference in Orlando!

Guess what the dates are?

You guessed it, the exact week that I've planned my vacation.

I emailed the CAO back and told her that I'd love to go but I've already planned a mother/daughter 21st birthday celebration. She came to my office later in the day and said "wouldn't your daughter like to go vacation in Orlando?" I said "yes as a matter of fact that's where she chose for her birthday vacation." She went on to tell me that this was an important convention for the accounting department and went on to explain why. She also added that I could save money since the practice would pay for my airfare

I know my daughter wouldn't want to hang around waiting for my convention day to end. So us going and working around the convention for 2.5 days isn't really an option. I checked alternate dates after the convention and there's no 1 bedroom availability at anywhere other than SSR, which my daughter hates! So that's out. We could get a 2 bedroom at OKW but that's a lot of space for just two people. Not to mention, I'd have to rebook her airfare and it would cost me an extra 4500 points.

Anyone have any advice? I was recently promoted to this position so I could benefit from the convention and I hate to tell my boss no but I hate to scrap the vacation I've been planning. Not to mention, I feel like I'd be inadvertently telling DD20 that my work is more important that her and her birthday celebration.

 

[happily single]

Honestly I would go to the convention. Is there any availability at Dvc before the convention? Since your work is paying for your airfare couldnt you use what you paid for your ticket to cover the cost of your daughter's ticket?

She may enjoy 2 days to herself, sitting by the pool, downtown disney, etc while you work

 

[mousehockey37]

So I planned a 5 day vacation for my DD20 and I to celebrate her 21st birthday. I'm a DVC member and I patiently waited for the 7 month window to snag BCV in a 1 bedroom. I put in my PTO request, and it was approved. I used some Southwest credits and some Rapid Rewards Points and booked our airfare the day they opened the booking up for our dates. As a bonus it was on sale.

Fast forward to today....I get an email from the Chief Administrative Officer at the medical practice that I work at telling me that me and one of my co-workers are going to a accounting conference in Orlando!

Guess what the dates are?

You guessed it, the exact week that I've planned my vacation.

I emailed the CAO back and told her that I'd love to go but I've already planned a mother/daughter 21st birthday celebration. She came to my office later in the day and said "wouldn't your daughter like to go vacation in Orlando?" I said "yes as a matter of fact that's where she chose for her birthday vacation." She went on to tell me that this was an important convention for the accounting department and went on to explain why. She also added that I could save money since the practice would pay for my airfare

I know my daughter wouldn't want to hang around waiting for my convention day to end. So us going and working around the convention for 2.5 days isn't really an option. I checked alternate dates after the convention and there's no 1 bedroom availability at anywhere other than SSR, which my daughter hates! So that's out. We could get a 2 bedroom at OKW but that's a lot of space for just two people. Not to mention, I'd have to rebook her airfare and it would cost me an extra 4500 points.

Anyone have any advice? I was recently promoted to this position so I could benefit from the convention and I hate to tell my boss no but I hate to scrap the vacation I've been planning. Not to mention, I feel like I'd be inadvertently telling DD20 that my work is more important that her and her birthday celebration.

Not to sound rude, but my first thing I would've said to her was.... "That sounds like a great oppotunity, too bad I'm already APPROVED for PTO then."

I would've never mentioned anything about where you were going for your vacation. That just gave the boss more ammunition to guilt trip you into going. The fact that you said it was for your daughters birthday, yeah, it's an easy write-off for the company to let her tag along.

Never mix business and pleasure.

I understand that this conference would be good for you, but you've already made the commitment to your daughter for her 21st birthday. You'll be able to attend as many conferences as you so desire in the future, your daughter only has 1 21st birthday. Stick with your original plans, A. You already have $$$ invested into them and B. Family is more important. Your job will be there when you get home and like I said earlier, there will be other conferences. Someone can and will be able to go in your place.

Don't disappoint everyone by trying to please everyone. Go and have a good time with your daughter, she's the reason you were headed there in the first place.

 

[Jedimom]

Rather than reschedule your vacation, could you reschedule the conference? Is there a similar conference at another time or location which you could attend?

 

[springandmac]

Rather than reschedule your vacation, could you reschedule the conference? Is there a similar conference at another time or location which you could attend?

Sadly not, it's an annual convention put on by the accounting software company that we use.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

Oh, I love conferences.

"Training sessions" that seem more like a sales pitch for the leader's book.
"Motivational speakers" telling fake stories.
"Lectures" on new techniques that come off like the same old techniques wrapped in our new software.
"Catch phrases" like "shifting paradigms", "core competancies", and "synergies".

Don't want to miss any of that

 

[brymolmom]

I have a couple thoughts on this on either side of the coin.

Looks like you and dd are fortunate enough to go annually or mostly-annually to WDW on vacations. Honestly - as someone who goes annually myself that would make a difference to me. I'd probably work around the convention...DD is old enough to likely appreciate some down-time/ pool time while you're at the convention and it WILL be less expensive. If the resort you want isn't available I'd stay at somewhere you ALWAYS wanted to stay - and then, of course, send a few nights of the bill (during the conference) to the company. Look at it as a way to experience a new resort.

On the other hand...You said you were recently promoted? Does that mean you've never attended one of these? Vendor/software user conferences, while very good IMO for the networking opportunities...are usually little more than LOTS of SALES PITCHES. And, since they're trying to up-sell to you - they likely will send a sales person onsite to do a similar pitch. Many of the presentations likely won't be geared to how your specific company uses their system (unless you use it out-of-the-box with no customizations which is rare)...And it will look wonderful with bells and whistles...But always behind the scenes it is way more complicated and expensive than it ever looks at these meetings. The only things I've ever taken away are conversations with OTHER USERS on the specifics of things they've run into (issues with the vendor system) and any similarities to what we've encountered. And with a bit of effort or just from getting contacts from your co-worker who is attending - you can have those same conversations without attending yourself.

 

[kydisneyfans]

I would attend the conference and extend the PTO time either after the conference or take it before the conference. The airfare is paid, so you are still ahead points even if you spend more on your daughter. Get on a DVC wait list for openings or check daily.

We have a similar situation with my wife. We had planned on a long weekend in DC, then her company came and said she needed to attend a conference in DC. We shifted the dates and flights around, now we are only paying for 1 night lodging instead of 4 and for flights for 2 instead of 3. Her meals are now covered and the cab cost from the airports and back will be too, since all 3 of us can ride at the same cost her company was paying for 1.

Figure out the way to save as much money as possible and make both things work.

 

[mousehockey37]

Oh, I love conferences.

"Training sessions" that seem more like a sales pitch for the leader's book.
"Motivational speakers" telling fake stories.
"Lectures" on new techniques that come off like the same old techniques wrapped in our new software.
"Catch phrases" like "shifting paradigms", "core competancies", and "synergies".

Don't want to miss any of that

All of which, when you go back to work and introduce what you learned, you hear:

"We don't like change."
"We're going to keep things just the way they are."
"Your ideas for a change have to be data tested and put in writing with your findings, in which after that we'll consider looking at why we sent you to the conference in the first place"
"We appreciate your 'Thinking outside the box' but that just won't fit in here'

and so on, and so forth...

So like I said, get the DD20, saddle up and have a 21st birthday trip to remember!!!!

Don't fall for this:
http://i1173.photobucket.com/albums/r600/moosemusic37/officedisney_zps9dca06e6.jpg

 

[springandmac]

Don't fall for this:
http://i1173.photobucket.com/albums/r600/moosemusic37/officedisney_zps9dca06e6.jpg

 

[Gumbo4x4]

All of which, when you go back to work and introduce what you learned, you hear:

"We don't like change."
"We're going to keep things just the way they are."
"Your ideas for a change have to be data tested and put in writing with your findings, in which after that we'll consider looking at why we sent you to the conference in the first place"
"We appreciate your 'Thinking outside the box' but that just won't fit in here'

and so on, and so forth...

So like I said, get the DD20, saddle up and have a 21st birthday trip to remember!!!!

Don't fall for this:

Nashville '98

 

[rachel09985]

Personally, I would not go to the conference. Actually this year I had to miss important work meetings for my vacation. No one ever expected me to cancel vacation for the work meetings.

If it is already planned you should not have to cancel your vacation for work.

 

[usnuzuloose]

I feel for you, every year the company made it mandatory to give our dates for vacation at the beginning of January. One year I did, I was all set to leave and was told I had to attend a mandatory meeting. I had to drop two days of my vacation. And then the pain went on as the meeting went on. My poor husband was waiting in the car for me to finish by 12, did not end till 3. Seems like jobs give you no choice in the matter.

 

[mgsquared]

I would go to the conference and have your daughter bring a friend on your already booked ticket. She is old enough that I don't think she will think work is more important. Work is just a necessity.
She can hang out on stormalong bay with her friend and in the evening you guys go for an awesome dinner (where maybe you order a cake?) and a drink at jellyrolls.

Or you tack on days after the conference at a non DVC resort and rent your current ressie to someone else (is that possible?)

 

[ashleyfallis]

I would go to the conference and have your daughter bring a friend on your already booked ticket. She is old enough that I don't think she will think work is more important. Work is just a necessity.
She can hang out on stormalong bay with her friend and in the evening you guys go for an awesome dinner (where maybe you order a cake?) and a drink at jellyrolls.

Or you tack on days after the conference at a non DVC resort and rent your current ressie to someone else (is that possible?)

This is a relly tricky one but i agree with mg - get her to take a friend, then everyone wins

 

[Happyjen27]

This is an awful situation!!

I would come up with a workable plan if at all possible to see if I can achieve both ends.

Can you get someone from the company to come to your location and go over the new aspects of the software for everyone in your group for a similar rate?

Would your company be willing to pay for alternate lodging for you if you add dates? For example, if they will pay a week's lodging, you could do the conference time on 'your dime' at BCV, and then they can pay for an additional week for you to stay after or before your conference at another very desirable disney property, some deluxe without DVC that you've been wanting to try. If it's THAT important for you to go, they should be able to throw some significant cash on that problem. If they aren't willing to work with you on this, then probably it's not that important that you go.

I hate these dilemmas, and I'm sorry you're in this situation!

 

[purpledisneyprncess]

I don't know much about airline points but can you get a refund on points if you pay using the company CC or cash, since they said they would pay? I would go to the convention and extend my vacation while down there. You recently got promoted so this is a good opportunity to attend that conference. I went to a convention in Orlando and learned a lot. Was a great experience. If you don't mind extending days onto your trip that would be the best bet. The timing of it does stink though.

 

[EMode]

OP is the conference in the middle of your vacation or in the beginning or tail end?

 

[springandmac]

OP is the conference in the middle of your vacation or in the beginning or tail end?

We're arriving Monday, the conference starts Tues & runs through Thursday at noon and we were leaving on Friday. So pretty much right in the middle.

I'm not sure extending the vacation is an option for my daughter. She just got a new job last month and she doesn't get PTO. I'm not sure how understanding her boss would be.

 

[MAJPLO]

We're arriving Monday, the conference starts Tues & runs through Thursday at noon and we were leaving on Friday. So pretty much right in the middle.

I'm not sure extending the vacation is an option for my daughter. She just got a new job last month and she doesn't get PTO. I'm not sure how understanding her boss would be.

IMO I would skip the conference. You planned and paid well in advance and it is for a special occasion, not just the regular annual vacation. I would be disappointed if my mom had to work during a vacation we were supposed to be spending together to celebrate such a big birthday. If this is an annual conference for the company then they already had the dates planned and your boss should have been able to find out and tell you sooner.