Thanks for all the feedback so far. Keep it coming!
I guess the part that REALLY interests me is how your ASD child has done with the sleeping issue. My son is almost 4 (will be almost 5 when we go next May). He has his own room and twin sized bed at home. I also have a 2 year old son. They don't share a room yet because my older one sometimes takes an hour (of talking to himself) to fall asleep at night. He also occasionally wakes up and has a night terror type episode and totally loses his cool, screaming, crying, etc. He ALSO wakes up about an hour prior to the other kid, so for now, sharing is not an option.
We stayed at the Grand Californian hotel at
Disneyland last October, all of us in one room. It only worked out b/c we got a bunk bed room (which DS had the bunkbed to himself, behind a "tent" we made of blankets to keep the light out) and we actually put the other DS in the pack and play INSIDE the closet w/ the door closed. It worked, but it was very difficult to get my older DS to sleep. It was a very stressful situation, one that we don't want to repeat for a long stay at WDW (we only stayed 3 nights at DL, but MAN were we exhausted!). Plus, the major con with that was that DH and I didn't have any "us" time. Once the kids were asleep, we couldn't even have the t.v. on or anything.
Right now, we're booked for the 1br Princess Suite at the Poly. The monorail is a HUGE plus for us. We do not want to rent a car (too much hassle involved with carseats and parking and such). We also do not want to rely solely on buses. The only (major) drawback to our current reservation is the price (can you say "ouch"?). However, the setup is perfect for us. I also like that it is concierge, which would be great for breakfast and snacks, and I like the idea of the concierge lounge to hang out in during the afternoon and to watch the fireworks either from the lounge or beach(both kids don't like loud noises, so watching them in park is not an option).
I keep going back and forth, though, between a DVC resort or 2 connecting rooms at Poly (non concierge) or one standard concierge room for all of us. At least at the deluxes w/daybeds, each child will have his own bed, which is a huge plus. On some days, I think we'd be fine in a standard room. But then, DS has a "night issue" and I realize how horrible that would be if it happened and we were all trying to sleep in the same room. It would wake everyone up. If we stay with the suite, we'd have him sleep on the daybed in the parlor, and put the other one in the room with us, so that if he woke up screaming, one of us would just go out and deal with him without waking the rest of us up. Same if we were in the DVC. I just can't seem to figure out what would be best. We are planning on 8 days, so it's not a decision to take lightly.
I have no desire to stay in the cabins. It's just totally NOT our style at all. I'm sure they're lovely, but I don't want to be that isolated from the parks and the bus system there is pretty annoying, from what I have heard.
I'll be the first to admit that I'm "deluxe spoiled". I won't stay at the values anymore either(too many negative experiences there) and my son really needs a hotel that at least has some peaceful areas to decompress (the hammock swings and the quiet flower lined walkways at Poly really seem great). I love the moderates, but I HATE the double beds. DH and I tried that once, and never again. Neither of us slept the whole week.
I just guess I'm hoping someone will come on and say that their child has horrible sleep problems at home, but at WDW slept like a log every night. Anyone?