What is your opinion about teens needing antidepresent medication?

[DisnyMama]

I was just wondering what other parents opinions were regarding this issue. My 14 year old DS started on Zoloft a little over a month ago upon recomendation from his Neurologogist, theraspist and myself. He has been dealing with neglect issues from his father who lives out of state and then to add insult to injury about a year and a half ago he got a big brother from the Big Brother/Big Sister program and the last 6 months this guy has not fullfilled his end of the commitment and has neglected him also. This poor kid can't take any more disapointment or neglect. He is such a great young man and to watch him deal with all of this breaks my heart. Luckily he has not become so depressed that he has become withdrawn. He just gets very teary eyed and sad which his doctors and I have noticed him have more dificulty dealing with in the last few months and we, including my son all agreed that he could benefit from medication. I am a single mom so it is just my son and I and I thought that I would have my sister's support. She is my only family. Boy was I wrong! She was totally against these types of medications and feels that all we need to do is get him involved in something. She tried to push him into karate with her kids but he does not like karate. He tried it and did not like it. He plays Baseball during baseball season and wants to play football next year. He is not lazy and has been on the internet looking for something in our area to do. Her and I just don't agree. Well, he has been on the medication for exactly one month and both he and I are already noticing a slight difference. He isn't feeling quite as bad and what should have been a very emotional few days wasn't as bad as it could have been.
So, what I am wanting to know is if anyone else has had experience with teenagers and needing to use antidepressent medication and what your thoughts are. Thanks.

 

[RadioFanatic]

you need to do what you and his doctor feel is best. It is not your sister's place to make you feel bad for your decision. Good luck and hugs!

 

[lewdyan1]

Sending you a PM.

 

[kaylajr]

another PM on the way

 

[Pea-n-Me]

It sounds like you have a good handle on the issues with your DS.

She was totally against these types of medications

Very rigid thinking on your sister's part. I'm sure she would not rather see your DS linger in a depressive state or worse yet become suicidal because he didn't seek treatment which is available to him under his doctor's supervision. Unfortunately, this does happen to many people because they think the same way. If he had a physiological disease instead of a psychological one (which may in fact have a physiological cause), I'm sure she wouldn't be opposed to medical treatment.

Teenage Suicide and Depression: http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/feeling_sad/suicide.html

Medications have their place, and if it was determined that this would be something that would benefit your DS, then nobody should make you feel badly about your decision. Not to encourage the stigmatization of depression or other emotional illnesses, but perhaps this is something you should just keep to yourselves and not leave yourself open to others's disapproval - it's your decision, you know what's best for your child. Stand strong. I agree it's good you are making efforts to find ways to build his self esteem. Best of luck to you and your son.

 

[clarabelle]

I agree with Pea -keep it to yourselves. This is a decision you made with his doctor for him and your family. Don't let people make you feel guilty for taking care of your son.

In addition to the medication there are some cognitive type things that may help.
You may consider seeing a cognitive therapist or getting a book with some cognitive techniques.
If you don't know cognitive therapy gives you tools that you can use in a certain way.
For example when my DD was having some anxiety and depression we had some techniques that we would use that would help distract her thoughts. Consider anxiety and depression as a "bad tape player" that is repeating bad thoughts in your head. There are some little techniques that can help break the cycle.
Also -his depression does not have to be situational. Some kids just are more prone to this kind of thing -it may or may not be because of his father etc...
PM me if you want the names of some books.

 

[Bashful2]

My DD16 takes Depakote & Effexor (9 pills total) for her Bipolar disorder and depression. Without it, she would not be able to function in society. Medications are not a cure-all, but they have their place. I have a problem with general practitioners prescribing them, but, if you trust your DS's neurologist and therapist, then I think it's a good idea to listen to what they say.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

My dd had to be on anxiety meds in grade school. We moved and she was not handling things well. Got her meds, counseling, etc...She is a HS Freshman today (med free).
I think when your child is suffering you need to help them. I have met many, many parents who let kids suffer when there are problems because they are in denial.
I do not understand that.

 

[eeyore kelly]

If a teen my parents were against antidepressants, I would be dead. I would have either committed suicide or made such a totally stupid decision it would have got me killed. Because of antidepressants, I was sane enough to work through my problems and now live my life without taking them.

My 14 year old DS started on Zoloft a little over a month ago upon recomendation from his Neurologogist, theraspist and myself.

These are the people you listen to. Tell the sister to go to H E double hockey sticks

 

[Buckalew11]

I am not an advocate of drugs but reading your post touched me because I have a client whose son became depressed after his parents divorced. Dad was also neglectful. Along with puberty starting this was a hard time in this kid's life. he was a great kid and a joy to be around (kind, thoughtful, friendly etc.) but couldn't find his "place" with the other kids like others do.

Through his teen years he was on and off meds and went to a doctor to talk things out. His mom, though loving, was a bit controlling and his dad neglectful. He was just a troubled young man in his mind.

At 19, he was in college and still struggling. He found suicide websites that discussed how to do it and, I guess, like the DIS (sorta), had message boards and he met others with problems like his. Anyway, through these websites and no meds at the time, he ended up ending his life after a long battle of many years.

Your sister doesn't know what is going on in his head and neither do most any of us. However, it may or may not be this serious or evolve into anything this serious. But, I'd be safe than sorry and try to do everything and anything to save your son.

Depression isn't anything to fool around with and Nancy would tell me to tell you to fight for him in anything that you can do. I think that if her son could have made it through those rough teen years, he would have had a better chance at happiness.

Good luck to you both. I will keep your son in my prayers.

 

[minkydog]

DS19 has been off & on anti-depressants since he was 13. We have tried several different ones, along with therapy. At the moment he is off meds and doing well.

One caution(and maybe you know this)--some antidepressants will cause moods to swing into high gear. This is more than just feeling good; it's extreme. It's mania. If it seems like your son is feeling "too good" call his doctor.

Forget talking to your sister. If she is going to make you second guess yourself, then don't share. You & your doctor know your child very well and will make far better decisions. Unless your sister has walked in your shoes, she really doesn't know what she's talking about.

 

[cardaway]

IMO they are being over perscribed. Many times with pressure from parents who would rather medicate than parent.

JMO.

 

[Florida_Mom]

In addition to the medication there are some cognitive type things that may help.
You may consider seeing a cognitive therapist or getting a book with some cognitive techniques.
If you don't know cognitive therapy gives you tools that you can use in a certain way.
Consider anxiety and depression as a "bad tape player" that is repeating bad thoughts in your head. There are some little techniques that can help break the cycle.

I second this completely. Cognitive behavior therapy is usually very short and very effective. Coupled with antidepressants, if necessary, it may be extremely effective.

An excellent book on this topic is "The Feeling Good Handbook" by Dr. David Burns. It's kind of a goofy title for a very good, practical and hands-on approach.

All the best to you!

 

[DisnyMama]

Thank you Pea-n-Me for the link. I did read it and appreciate the information.

Buckalew11 - Fighting for my son is exactly how I feel. I will do anything and everything to help him. He has been in therapy for the past two years but needs something more. Thank you.

Minkydog - I was not aware that some meds could cause "mania". I will have to keep this in mind and watch him. Thank you.

Cardaway- Thank you for your opinion which you are entitled to. However, that is not so in my case. My number one priority is my son. An example as to my "parenting", he is off school for winter break for 3 weeks. The first week we were on vacation which we returned last Saturday and I was suposed to return to work last Monday but I chose to stay home with him this week, without pay, so that he would not be home alone for two weeks straight. Most teenage kids it would be no big deal for them to be home alone but at this time both his therapist and I did not feel that he should be home by himself for 2 weeks straight.

Thank you to everyone for your support, advice and wisdom. In regards to my sister's lack of support, it is just that. My son is my top priority and I will continue to due what I feel is the best course of action/treatment for him regardless of what anyone else says, thinks or feels.

God Bless and Happy New Year to All!!
Shannon

 

[minkydog]

Thank you Pea-n-Me for the link. I did read it and appreciate the information.

Buckalew11 - Fighting for my son is exactly how I feel. I will do anything and everything to help him. He has been in therapy for the past two years but needs something more. Thank you.

Minkydog - I was not aware that some meds could cause "mania". I will have to keep this in mind and watch him. Thank you.

Cardaway- Thank you for your opinion which you are entitled to. However, that is not so in my case. My number one priority is my son. An example as to my "parenting", he is off school for winter break for 3 weeks. The first week we were on vacation which we returned last Saturday and I was suposed to return to work last Monday but I chose to stay home with him this week, without pay, so that he would not be home alone for two weeks straight. Most teenage kids it would be no big deal for them to be home alone but at this time both his therapist and I did not feel that he should be home by himself for 2 weeks straight.

Thank you to everyone for your support, advice and wisdom. In regards to my sister's lack of support, it is just that. My son is my top priority and I will continue to due what I feel is the best course of action/treatment for him regardless of what anyone else says, thinks or feels.

God Bless and Happy New Year to All!!
Shannon

I think you're doing a great job. When your child is depressed you really do have to treat it as a critical incident. When my son became manic(on Zoloft,btw) he tried to kill himself. We dropped everything else to tend to him, just as if he were in intensive care. Because that's how it felt. For weeks afterward he couldn't be left unattended, like a baby--you do what you have to to keep your child safe. Later in the year he deteriorated to the point that he couldn't even go to school--I taught him at home, 12th grade. It's a tough row to hoe and my hat's off to you for sticking with it. No one else really knows how hard it is.

Cathy--mom to John,19(1st year of college, musical theatre major, medically/emotionally stable now)

 

[lsyorke]

Please be aware that these drugs are not recommended by the FDA for children and carry the most serious warning for suicide that the FDA could put on them. Clinical trials showed that they worked no better than a sugar pill and had serious adverse effects. They do NOT have FDA approval.

Since you know why he is having these issues, why not therapy to help him learn to deal with those specific issues, instead of altering his brain chemistry?

I can speak firsthand about this..my son attempted suicide after a year on an ssri and went through a year of withdrawal to get off of it. He is great now, having had therapy.. drug free.

 

[Sparx]

sending you a pm.

 

[DisnyMama]

There was a previous post where it was stated something like "I should get him into therapy instead of altering his brain chemistry".

Response Post #16-I replied to some posts and in one I stated that my son has been in therapy for the past "two" years. I also thated that he has a therapist in the original thread. This is not just something that has come along lately or in the past two years. This has been building up since he was about 7 years old in which he has been with a couple different therapists. When his father lived here we tried to get him to go to some of his appointments but he wanted no part of it and then he moved to Texas. That brought on a whole new set of emotional problems because dad moved with his new wife, new daugher and stepson. They started flying him out during winter and summer breaks then that slowly declined along with the phone calls.
I should also add something else that might help to understand why the doctors and his therapist are concerned about not letting his depression get out of hand. His father has been diagnosed as manic depressive/Bipolar but has always refused to go on medication. When we were married his mood swings were huge. You never new what you were going to get. I walked on eggshells because of his swings. He was never violent, just moody and I thank God that my son does not have to live with that everyday. Secondly, my ex-husband had a younger sister that commited suicide when she was a young adult. He also has an older brother that is suffering from depression. When I told all of this to the doctors they became even more concerened. Therapy alone has not helped. We have tried to get him into therapy peer groups with other kids his age but they never seem to be able to get enough kids together. I put him on the Big Brother waiting list, waited a year, got who we thought was a great guy for about 9 months and then he fizzled on his commitment due to being too busy with his new teaching job. I have taken alot of time off of work to be home with my son. My annual salary should be around $38,000 but I have missed so much work this passed year that I have only made approx. $19,000.

If there is another option other than therapy or medication, I would sure love to hear it. I thank you for your PM's regarding what to watch for and the warnings. A really appreciate the words of encouragement and support as they mean a great deal.

The Best to All of You,
Shannon

 

[DisneyPhD]

I am a clinical therapist (Social Worker) and worked with many youths who were helped by both therpay and medications.

I think you have carefully looked into this and not taken this step lightly. I also don't agree with GP or peds prescribing anti depressions meds or anti psycholtic (often used for depression or bi polar.)

I agree with the posters to keep an eye out for mania. Zolfot is a good medication, it is not known for triggerin mania (prozac and paxil are.)

One word about suicide. Often the medicaiton are blamed for it, but if the person (or youth) was not a risk for it chances are they would not be prescribed the medicaiton in the 1st place. Therefore it can be very difficult to lable it as a "side effect." More people commint suicide as a result of not getting the help then need (inculding medication) then as a result.

buckalew11, your post about the suicide chat rooms scares the pants off me. One reason to look into what your child is looking at on the internent.

OP, it looks like you are carefully trying to do what ever is best for you son. It isn't easy.

My question is, is the medicaiton helping? (it can take 4 to 6 weeks to see a difference, but some people do with in a few days.) How does your son feel about taking it?

 

[DisnyMama]

DisneyPhd-Thank you for your response. My son and I are a family together. As Stitch would say, Little but Good. We made this descision together and discussed it openly with his doctors and therapist. We have both noticed a slight change for the better. Lets just say that the weekend of Christmas should have been an emotional roller coaster due to his father and this year it wasn't quite as bad. He is having weekly and somtimes depending on scheduling, biweekly therapy sessions and seeing the phychiatrist on a monthly basis. He is being monitored well. If at any time my son feels uncomfortable taking this medication I will contact the doctor and we will discuss weaning him off.

Shannon