What is the worst thing a sibling/cousin has done to you?

meaty

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Jul 21, 2014
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346
Or what you have done to them

My brother when were kids wrote on the wall and blamed it on me.
 
Oh, my Sister and I...where to start? She was known to have a temper as a child, and granted, as the little brother I might have had some of it coming when she'd chase me through the house, but when she stopped at the silverware drawer to grab a knife, that's when the adults would step in. She'd have that look in her eyes like she'd do it too.

In later years she almost lit me on fire with some dumb guy she was seeing (teenager). They tossed my bike down into this big storm ditch behind our house. When I went to get it, they were waiting underneath he street, pulled me in, and had spray paint and matches, lighting some spray painted spots on the concrete as they pinned me down. Insane, much?

Later still she kicked a dent in my car after practically attacking me across the dinner table. Now, I had called her out on something that she was keeping a secret, but she flipped. It was ugly. We didn't speak for weeks.

She also played a few harmless pranks on me, mostly by tossing me in the pool (once with my bike too). Ahh, siblings.
 
I only have one cousin, and no siblings.

My grandmother (who enjoyed creating drama) used to play my cousin and I off against each other. My cousin was very pretty, with long dark wavy hair and cute dresses. I was... well, overalls and "pixie" cut light brown hair that stuck up at odd angles. She was a couple years older, and I remember her teasing me a lot (just saying mean things). Whenever I reacted, I was the one who got in trouble, not her. I had a reputation for being awkward and rude. She was everyone's little angel.

Mind you, I'm sure I was hugely annoying as a kid, so I can't really blame people. But I do think they could have been a little more tolerant.

The worst thing she ever did, though, was ignore me. My grandmother arranged to have me go to some big fancy summer camp in the Adirondacks with her - the kind where you stay in real log cabins and everyone's rich (except me, of course). Very first day, my cousin finds me and says, "I don't know you and you don't know me. DON'T even THINK of talking to me!" Camp was crummy experience, overall. I was bullied pretty severely by the other kids. (Edit: Plus, they promised horse back riding, but I never got a chance to meet a single pony the entire time I was there! Grr...)

Similarly, the last time I saw her, a few years later when we were teens, she said, "You can follow me to the store, but you're going to walk a minimum of one block behind me and my friends. And you will not speak to us or acknowledge us in any way!"

But, whenever she spoke to any of the adults, she was always super sweet and would tell them that she loved me. I think that bugged me more than anything, considering it's not like she ever did anything particularly horrible to me.

My mom's still in contact with her, and thinks she's great. I'm sure she's matured a lot, now that she's a grown up lady in her late forties, but I'm not really interested in finding out.
 
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This is going to sound stupid.

I have 3 brothers and 1 sister. 1 brother we aren't very close to anymore due to his personal choices (married a druggie and moved 4 hours away). We try to be there for his kids and would be there for him, but there's nothing we can do. CYS is aware of his wife's habits and chooses not to intervene.

My brother closest in age to me is a goof, who I love dearly. He isn't terribly responsible or dependable, but he's got a good heart and tries.

My sister lives with us currently, and is amazing.

My final brother is usually really reliable and dependable. Any time you need him, he's there. I've come to depend on that, it's part of who he is.

So I throw my 4 year old a birthday party and invite my family, along with my inlaws. The only people who show up are my MIL, FIL, my parents, sister and family. My brothers never even bothered telling me they weren't coming. One brother I wasn't surprised. The other one, I asked why he didn't come. He didn't feel like getting up that early to come (the party was at 11, 45 minutes from his home), besides, his son is going through a stage where he doesn't like leaving the house (except to see grandma and pappy and his cousins, all of whom were there).

It really hurt me. I would never do that to his son or him. It's probably stupid for me to be so upset about it, but I can't help it. My poor sweetie already has her birthday right after Christmas so it feels like she always kind of gets the short end of the stick. And she was so disappointed her uncles weren't there and I couldn't give her a reason why they weren't.
 

I only have one cousin, and no siblings.

My grandmother (who enjoyed creating drama) used to play my cousin and I off against each other. My cousin was very pretty, with long dark wavy hair and cute dresses. I was... well, overalls and "pixie" cut light brown hair that stuck up at odd angles. She was a couple years older, and I remember her teasing me a lot (just saying mean things). Whenever I reacted, I was the one who got in trouble, not her. I had a reputation for being awkward and rude. She was everyone's little angel.

Mind you, I'm sure I was hugely annoying as a kid, so I can't really blame people. But I do think they could have been a little more tolerant.

The worst thing she ever did, though, was ignore me. My grandmother arranged to have me go to some big fancy summer camp in the Adirondacks with her - the kind where you stay in real log cabins and everyone's rich (except me, of course). Very first day, my cousin finds me and says, "I don't know you and you don't know me. DON'T even THINK of talking to me!" Camp was crummy experience, overall. I was bullied pretty severely by the other kids. (Edit: Plus, they promised horse back riding, but I never got a chance to meet a single pony the entire time I was there! Grr...)

Similarly, the last time I saw her, a few years later when we were teens, she said, "You can follow me to the store, but you're going to walk a minimum of one block behind me and my friends. And you will not speak to us or acknowledge us in any way!"

But, whenever she spoke to any of the adults, she was always super sweet and would tell them that she loved me. I think that bugged me more than anything, considering it's not like she ever did anything particularly horrible to me.

My mom's still in contact with her, and thinks she's great. I'm sure she's matured a lot, now that she's a grown up lady in her late forties, but I'm not really interested in finding out.

Sounds like Nellie Oleson and Laura Ingalls in Little House on the Prairie!
 
Big stuff. My brother disowned me. I wouldn't lie for him and he cut me off. He also expected me to forsake my religion for him because he and his wife were afraid to deal with her parents about a religious issue. The rest of us were expected to fall in line. He then lied about the incident to my parents who felt I was being disloyal. They too disowned me. I could go and on about the dysfunction but that's an abridged version. None of them see my three small children either.
 
My brother set my hair on fire once! I had super-teased, super-hairsprayed 80's hair and he purposefully lit a lighter right at the side of my head! I beat it out quickly, but the smell.. ugh!
 
/
Our family is very close and reasonably emotionally healthy, etc. But when he was 33 my brother suddenly decided that he didn't like the way he had been treated his whole life and he cut us all off including my young DD's - his nieces with whom he was close. I suspect there is more to the story and maybe something going on with him but l'll probably never know.

He graces our parents with his presence once or twice a year when they beg to see him. And he treats them like crap when he does. I have grieved for him as if he had passed away and have subsequently moved on. It's been 6 years and tbh I don't really miss him anymore. Nor do I have the time, energy or incentive to deal with him and his issues.
 
I only have one cousin, and no siblings.

My grandmother (who enjoyed creating drama) used to play my cousin and I off against each other. My cousin was very pretty, with long dark wavy hair and cute dresses. I was... well, overalls and "pixie" cut light brown hair that stuck up at odd angles. She was a couple years older, and I remember her teasing me a lot (just saying mean things). Whenever I reacted, I was the one who got in trouble, not her. I had a reputation for being awkward and rude. She was everyone's little angel.

Mind you, I'm sure I was hugely annoying as a kid, so I can't really blame people. But I do think they could have been a little more tolerant.

The worst thing she ever did, though, was ignore me. My grandmother arranged to have me go to some big fancy summer camp in the Adirondacks with her - the kind where you stay in real log cabins and everyone's rich (except me, of course). Very first day, my cousin finds me and says, "I don't know you and you don't know me. DON'T even THINK of talking to me!" Camp was crummy experience, overall. I was bullied pretty severely by the other kids. (Edit: Plus, they promised horse back riding, but I never got a chance to meet a single pony the entire time I was there! Grr...)

Similarly, the last time I saw her, a few years later when we were teens, she said, "You can follow me to the store, but you're going to walk a minimum of one block behind me and my friends. And you will not speak to us or acknowledge us in any way!"

But, whenever she spoke to any of the adults, she was always super sweet and would tell them that she loved me. I think that bugged me more than anything, considering it's not like she ever did anything particularly horrible to me.

My mom's still in contact with her, and thinks she's great. I'm sure she's matured a lot, now that she's a grown up lady in her late forties, but I'm not really interested in finding out.

That is horrible! I wouldn't stick around to find out either!

My sister and my aunt used to be awful to me. My sister is 14 months older and my aunt (youngest of 7, my mother was the oldest) is about 4 years older. She and my sister would run to my aunt's bedroom and wait for me to get almost there before slamming the door in my face and telling me I couldn't come in. They would play Barbies and take all the good ones and, if forced to include me, would give me the one with no clothes and one arm, lol. They would constantly exclude me from what they were doing, and if I tried to join in anyway, they would just walk away. Like if we were were outside on the swing-set and we all ran for the two swings. If I got there first and one of them didn't get a swing, the other one would get off of hers and they would go inside and leave me out there alone. This went on for YEARS - I'm talking from toddlerhood on...they wouldn't do anything overtly mean in front of anyone or physically hurt me, they were just very good at being exclusionary mean girls and making sure I was quite aware that I was not wanted nor important enough to be around them.

If I would tell my mom or grandma, they would gang up on me and tell their version, which of course would collaborate and be 2 against 1. If I would cry, I would be labeled as the "sensitive one" who couldn't get along with the other two and created problems because of course when I wasn't there, everything was peace and harmony with just the two of them (duh)!. If I fought back on my own, I would get in trouble for fighting with them. And the crazy thing is, To This Day, both of them love to tell the stories of how much of a brat and pain I was when we were little because I used to "try" to get them in trouble all the time. Seriously!!! They were the biggest jerks ever and somehow it was always all my fault!

Ugh....I think I just uncovered the root cause of my irrationally intense hatred of middle school mean girls. lol I was kind of a mean girl in parts of middle school and I look back on those days with shame! Thankfully, I think I have raised my DD to be better than that!

The same sister also thought it was funny to call me a dog and bark at me when were were tweens, especially in front of my friends. And loved to tell my boyfriends about it too. Let me tell you, it was a terrific confidence booster to a 12 year old girl! (not!)

Needless to say, I don't have much of a relationship with either one of them. I see my sister and we get along all right, but we are not close (I don't trust her at all!), and my aunt is one of those annoying "everything is so awful in my perfect life so I always need wine" kind of people, so I blocked her from social media and I avoid her at family functions lol Our kids are the same ages, and her oldest started the same stunts with my DS16 when they were little, which I stopped right away. Her DS16 doesn't like me a whole lot either. lol
 
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Hands down worst thing she was tell my family I was an alcoholic. I got into a fender bender and the closest landmark was a brewery. She told my ENTIRE family I was drinking and got a DUI. I had family members from out of state calling me to see how I was doing, and if I had a drinking problem.
 
...and making sure I was quite aware that I was not wanted nor important enough to be around them.

That's the crux of the issue, right there! It's a sneaky way of tearing another child down and building yourself up at their expense, and so much of the time adults just don't seem to see what's going on.

And it can cause long term resentment and insecurity in the kid that's constantly being targeted and scapegoated.

Hey, I think I understand now why the one thing I kept snapping at the kids when they were little was, "Don't be RUDE!" :laughing: I can't make them like each other, or hang out with each other, but come heck or high water my guys were going to be courteous and respectful to each other.
 
I can hardly think of anything other than normal very mild teasing. I was the baby of the family by quite a bit, and I can think of some obnoxious childish things I did to them when I was little ;) But my siblings are all super nice. I don't know my cousins all that well, but they are nice too I think.
 
My favorite brother hooked my eyelid with a fish hook when he was casting (he was 6, I was 8).
 
That is horrible! I wouldn't stick around to find out either!

My sister and my aunt used to be awful to me. My sister is 14 months older and my aunt (youngest of 7, my mother was the oldest) is about 4 years older. She and my sister would run to my aunt's bedroom and wait for me to get almost there before slamming the door in my face and telling me I couldn't come in. They would play Barbies and take all the good ones and, if forced to include me, would give me the one with no clothes and one arm, lol. They would constantly exclude me from what they were doing, and if I tried to join in anyway, they would just walk away. Like if we were were outside on the swing-set and we all ran for the two swings. If I got there first and one of them didn't get a swing, the other one would get off of hers and they would go inside and leave me out there alone. This went on for YEARS - I'm talking from toddlerhood on...they wouldn't do anything overtly mean in front of anyone or physically hurt me, they were just very good at being exclusionary mean girls and making sure I was quite aware that I was not wanted nor important enough to be around them.

If I would tell my mom or grandma, they would gang up on me and tell their version, which of course would collaborate and be 2 against 1. If I would cry, I would be labeled as the "sensitive one" who couldn't get along with the other two and created problems because of course when I wasn't there, everything was peace and harmony with just the two of them (duh)!. If I fought back on my own, I would get in trouble for fighting with them. And the crazy thing is, To This Day, both of them love to tell the stories of how much of a brat and pain I was when we were little because I used to "try" to get them in trouble all the time. Seriously!!! They were the biggest jerks ever and somehow it was always all my fault!

Ugh....I think I just uncovered the root cause of my irrationally intense hatred of middle school mean girls. lol I was kind of a mean girl in parts of middle school and I look back on those days with shame! Thankfully, I think I have raised my DD to be better than that!

The same sister also thought it was funny to call me a dog and bark at me when were were tweens, especially in front of my friends. And loved to tell my boyfriends about it too. Let me tell you, it was a terrific confidence booster to a 12 year old girl! (not!)

Needless to say, I don't have much of a relationship with either one of them. I see my sister and we get along all right, but we are not close (I don't trust her at all!), and my aunt is one of those annoying "everything is so awful in my perfect life so I always need wine" kind of people, so I blocked her from social media and I avoid her at family functions lol Our kids are the same ages, and her oldest started the same stunts with my DS16 when they were little, which I stopped right away. Her DS16 doesn't like me a whole lot either. lol

My older sister sounds a lot like yours. Same type of exclusion, belittling, etc. Two years ago, out of the blue, she apologized to me! Once she became an adult, she was nicer to me, but I always thought she didn't think she did anything wrong. I have no idea what prompted the apology, but it was certainly nice to hear, even after all these years.
 
Nothing compared to what I've read about in this thread, lol. My brother and I used to beat the crap out of each other, and on at least one occasion Grandma seriously considered taking me to the ER to get stitches. Nowadays, of course, we're both adult men and get along just fine, lol.
 
Nothing compared to what I've read about in this thread, lol. My brother and I used to beat the crap out of each other, and on at least one occasion Grandma seriously considered taking me to the ER to get stitches. Nowadays, of course, we're both adult men and get along just fine, lol.

I started mine when the thread started and afterwards, reading other posters, realized how little I have to complain over. We all get along pretty well. Normal teasing when growing up, but there were so many of us, it was never 1 on 1 or 2 on 1. Someone always had your back. :grouphug:
 
That is horrible! I wouldn't stick around to find out either!

My sister and my aunt used to be awful to me. My sister is 14 months older and my aunt (youngest of 7, my mother was the oldest) is about 4 years older. She and my sister would run to my aunt's bedroom and wait for me to get almost there before slamming the door in my face and telling me I couldn't come in. They would play Barbies and take all the good ones and, if forced to include me, would give me the one with no clothes and one arm, lol. They would constantly exclude me from what they were doing, and if I tried to join in anyway, they would just walk away. Like if we were were outside on the swing-set and we all ran for the two swings. If I got there first and one of them didn't get a swing, the other one would get off of hers and they would go inside and leave me out there alone. This went on for YEARS - I'm talking from toddlerhood on...they wouldn't do anything overtly mean in front of anyone or physically hurt me, they were just very good at being exclusionary mean girls and making sure I was quite aware that I was not wanted nor important enough to be around them.

If I would tell my mom or grandma, they would gang up on me and tell their version, which of course would collaborate and be 2 against 1. If I would cry, I would be labeled as the "sensitive one" who couldn't get along with the other two and created problems because of course when I wasn't there, everything was peace and harmony with just the two of them (duh)!. If I fought back on my own, I would get in trouble for fighting with them. And the crazy thing is, To This Day, both of them love to tell the stories of how much of a brat and pain I was when we were little because I used to "try" to get them in trouble all the time. Seriously!!! They were the biggest jerks ever and somehow it was always all my fault!

Ugh....I think I just uncovered the root cause of my irrationally intense hatred of middle school mean girls. lol I was kind of a mean girl in parts of middle school and I look back on those days with shame! Thankfully, I think I have raised my DD to be better than that!

The same sister also thought it was funny to call me a dog and bark at me when were were tweens, especially in front of my friends. And loved to tell my boyfriends about it too. Let me tell you, it was a terrific confidence booster to a 12 year old girl! (not!)

Needless to say, I don't have much of a relationship with either one of them. I see my sister and we get along all right, but we are not close (I don't trust her at all!), and my aunt is one of those annoying "everything is so awful in my perfect life so I always need wine" kind of people, so I blocked her from social media and I avoid her at family functions lol Our kids are the same ages, and her oldest started the same stunts with my DS16 when they were little, which I stopped right away. Her DS16 doesn't like me a whole lot either. lol

Growing up on my dad's side of the family, including my younger sister & me, there were 7 cousins divided into 2 groups - the older siblings & the younger siblings. I was the youngest of the "older siblings" group. There were 3 of us, all girls, & we were each the oldest in our respective families. We were "stair-step" in ages, so, when I was 7, the next cousin was 8, & the next cousin was 9. The only time we were all together was during holidays, & those "family holidays" were my first experience w/ "mean girl" behavior! LOL! I have vivid memories of playing w/ them - the oldest cousin got to be the queen, the next one got to the princess, & I had to be the maid. Every. single. time. The younger sibling group was boys except for my sister, so, sometimes, we included her in our group. And, whenever she played w/ us, she got to the be "baby princess," & I was still the maid. I was very shy & quiet, &, since we only really ever saw them during holidays, I was always too shy to say anything. My grandparents had some bikes we'd ride, & the two of them always got the best bikes & I had to ride the rickety boy bike. And the swings on the swingset! LOL! Yes, there were only two, so I had to watch until it was my turn, &, when it was my turn, they'd run off to do something else. And, while they made fun of me for just silly, little things, as a little girl, it bothered me. And maybe even made me more shy & less self-confident? I don't know...

We've all grown up now, & we see each other even less - whenever there's a family funeral. And we're all very nice to each other when we see each other. It wasn't like there was ever any huge drama or anything among us, but I do remember how it felt to feel like the "third wheel" of the group.
 
My sister blamed me for her husband assaulting me. He is an alcoholic who had done many terrible, inappropriate things (both to me and others). He pushed me during an argument and kicked me out of their house. My sister said he told her it was my fault he pushed me and she said she had to believe him...had to "give him the benefit of the doubt" is how she put it. I didn't see where the was much doubt. He admitted pushing me and his behaviour over the previous month should have cast away any credibility he once had. After that our relationship was never the same. We haven't spoken in years.
 
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My junior year in high school my parents went on vacation and left my brother (he was a freshman) home alone. My aunt and uncle lived just a few miles away and we had neighbors a few yards away so it isn't like we were isolated or anything.

My brother threw a party, of course, and I tried to stop him but he was going to do it anyway. I knew he was going to get busted so I wasn't even home that night, I went to a late dinner and movie with friends. He totally trashed the house and didn't lift a finger to clean it up until the night my parents were coming home. He tried to blackmail me by saying if I told our parents it was him who threw the party he would tell them I told him it was OK to have it.

Somehow, I still got in trouble for how many miles I put on my moms car. I had to drive to school and back each day, I had to take myself to work and back a few times that week, had to take my brother to work and back twice that week, and drive him about 50 miles one way to my aunts house so he could go downstate to a football game. I explained that to her but somehow I still got in trouble. I never did figure that one out.
 
My brother and I physically fought a lot as children, there was tons of bruises and pinching was the worst. As an adult though his violent temper has turned to cheapness, just 3 months ago I asked him to sell a pair of Six Flag tickets on Ebay for me...and he never gave me the money..he instead scammed me into buying a monthly subscription to Spotify with him and my SIL so he didn't have to hand over however much he got for the tix...tightwad.

I have to add though, the worst thing that I ever did was when I was 6 and my cousin was 3 her other grandmother passed. My mom specifically told me not to tell her. So of course, I ran to the back yard, sat down next to my one and only cousin (at the time) put my arm around her neck and whispered in her ear "your Grandmas's dead" lol, what a little beast I was :rotfl2:I JUST told her that story 3 weeks ago, thankfully she doesn't remember!
 














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