What do you do for mom or dad time?

[MsMamaBear]

Edited- Mom OR Dad time! Sorry!

Do you have time set aside each week for some time to yourself? Does your family have to force you to go? LOL! What do you do?

I don't go out often, REALLY just got back into going out, but my friends and I started a yearly tradition of Ladies Weekend where we take a quick overnight trip. ( We're going to Las Vegas in June, excited!) We also do birthday dinners throughout the year. Weekly, I don't do much. I may get a run in alone sometimes (most times my daughter is in the jogging stroller) so that's a little mom time to myself.

 

[Tiffylv]

.

 

[jamnmom]

Because my youngest son's (15) schedule with school, band, scouts, church, etc is so hectic and full 12 months a year (there's NO summer break for band!), I don't have the opportunity to do much other than go with him to 'stuff' and be his transportation. My oldest is 35; so by the time I'm an 'empty nester' I will have been 'momming' for more than 38 years!! I'm really looking forward to having that time for myself; but, it also scares me. I don't know HOW to do this -- be just ME; and I KNOW I will miss all of my kids like crazy!! I don't have any plans to be with someone by then because I completely ENJOY being single!!

Last week I had the opportunity to be just ME. My son went on a river rafting expedition 3 states away and had to fly to/from by himself. I took this time off work and went on a "MEcation" to a resort community about 5 hours from home. I needed to see what it was like to do fun stuff by myself. I went to a few music concerts; did a few sightseeing excursions; went to restaurants by myself....it was GREAT!! I do have wonderful friends and family and, as I said, spend a lot of time with my kids and grandkids; so, for me, "mom time" is really "ME (alone) time". After spending this week by myself, I now know that I will do just fine as a single empty nester when that day comes. *Side Note: When that time DOES come, I plan to move to Orlando area and spend a LOT of time at DISNEY!!! THAT will be the BEST part of it all!!*

 

[MommyMeNDisney]

I'm not ready yet. Friends try to get me to go out without DS. I don't want to go anywhere without him. I work when he's with his dad. I'm sad the day/hours before he goes with his dad. This past weekend I didn't work, so I got a pedicure and shopped for DS while he was away.

When DS stops nursing, I'm going to have a glass of wine at night. That will be my "me" time. Lol

 

[luvmy2babies]

What is this "me time" of which you speak?

Unless I'm at work or have to be somewhere I can't take my children, I pretty much always have at least one of them. My daughter is starting to go do things with a friend or have activities so at those time I am with ds. The exception is when we are at church and they go to children's church while I remain in the regular service. I really don't get invited anywhere since my sitter I used for school closings or other times went to college that is how it's been. I have time to myself after they go to bed.

But the times are changing. Ds starts Kindergarten this fall and they will be at the same school for the next 2 years. The facility where they will be in after school care works differently than most in that it's also a drop in center and stays open longer. For aftercare, you get 4 hours from the time they get on the van at school. They help with homework and they will serve them dinner for a small extra fee. So I joined a gym nearby so I can go workout a couple of days during the week and on Saturdays.

Curious too as to what other moms and dads do for alone time.

 

[hdrolfe]

I don't really do me time. I have used a Kids Night Out a few times, drop him off at a play gym for 3 hours on Friday evening, but it means he's up way later than normal and sets the weekend up poorly since he doesn't sleep in to make up for that! Even then I just do groceries or watch something on TV, nothing too exciting. This summer my parents took him for most of a week and that was so strange! I got to sleep in, watch grown up tv whenever I wanted, didn't have to cook healthy meals and missed him a lot. During the school year I get up at 4:30 so I can exercise before he gets up (at 6:30) and I use a before/after school program he enjoys. I will go home from work, spend 30 minutes on whatever I want, including dinner prep, cleaning, etc, and then go get him as he is always having fun with his friends. And of course, after he goes to bed, I get a bit of time, but I go to bed early so I can get up early. I don't go out without him though, unless I'm off from work for whatever reason, then I'll do groceries without him or something like that. Oh, and birthday parties! Now that he is old enough to go to drop off birthday parties I get a few hours while he's at those (maybe once a month).

 

[DisneyClown]

My kids go with their Dad every other Sunday from 11:30-7 and every other Monday until 7. On Mondays I am working until 2:30 or 3:30, so I might have a few hours after work on those days. Otherwise, every other Sunday I am dropping them off to him after church, and then I have until 7 to do something. I usually utilize those times to get my grocery shopping done, mow the lawn, or get things done around the house, uninterrupted (which is a treat really!). I rarely go out to eat and I NEVER go out to "do" anything, like movies or out with friends. My social time is usually taking my kids over to my sister's house to play with her kids and having coffee and chatting. My mother-in-law will once in a great while have my daughter overnight, and she would take my son too, but he is still prone to croup and needs a breathing treatment to cope, so she is too nervous to deal with that so he stays with me. It does help though, because then there is no fighting between the two while she is gone.

At the moment I really have no desire to start up a relationship. I can MAYBE see this changing as my children get older and have more independent lives. Sometimes I do wish I had a bit more time to myself, but really it's not going to last forever. My kids will grow up and not need so much of my time, so I am trying to enjoy what I can with them now. That's why I am looking forward to our cruise next year.

 

[MsMamaBear]

I thank God every day that I have Fridays off. I work 4 10 hour days and have Friday off. I have no family support at all...I never really knew my father and I haven't spoken to my mother or step father in about 10 years other than a brief reconciliation when I had little man. No siblings and you guys already know I'm a single mom haha. I also did not have a baby sitter until little man was almost 6....little man and I have been through some hard times and that made me so nervous to leave him with someone. When he was 5 though I began to trust one of his daycare teachers enough to ask her to sit for him. So for almost 6 years I never left the house without him aside from work. We went to have lunch or whatever with my girlfriends sometimes. And sometimes I would host a movie/wine night after little man went to bed. But I never went out without him.

Fridays off were my saving grace. I would take him to school for a few hours and I would take a nap, watch tv alone, grocery shop alone, meet a friend on a lunch break, go to the mall, take a jog, read a book...whatever. That was literally the only thing that kept me sane. I still do enjoy my Fridays off but it's not quite so desperate now that I also have a sitter. I usually spend more on the sitter than I do on going out but it's so worth it. My friends and I do the birthday dinner, or a movie, holiday parties, etc. I'm working up the nerve to plan a weekend or overnight trip. I've left little man with the sitter for one night (like a put him to bed, wake up with him, take him to school the next day whole night) two separate times and a weekend another time but those were all for work. Everything was perfectly fine but it's hard on little man and I hate to do it when I don't have to. Plus it costs a scary amount of money ($700 for the weekend )

Those Fridays sound like fun! I know it was important before you had a babysitter! I was the same way until my sister moved nearby. My mom lives an hour away.

Because my youngest son's (15) schedule with school, band, scouts, church, etc is so hectic and full 12 months a year (there's NO summer break for band!), I don't have the opportunity to do much other than go with him to 'stuff' and be his transportation. My oldest is 35; so by the time I'm an 'empty nester' I will have been 'momming' for more than 38 years!! I'm really looking forward to having that time for myself; but, it also scares me. I don't know HOW to do this -- be just ME; and I KNOW I will miss all of my kids like crazy!! I don't have any plans to be with someone by then because I completely ENJOY being single!!

Last week I had the opportunity to be just ME. My son went on a river rafting expedition 3 states away and had to fly to/from by himself. I took this time off work and went on a "MEcation" to a resort community about 5 hours from home. I needed to see what it was like to do fun stuff by myself. I went to a few music concerts; did a few sightseeing excursions; went to restaurants by myself....it was GREAT!! I do have wonderful friends and family and, as I said, spend a lot of time with my kids and grandkids; so, for me, "mom time" is really "ME (alone) time". After spending this week by myself, I now know that I will do just fine as a single empty nester when that day comes. *Side Note: When that time DOES come, I plan to move to Orlando area and spend a LOT of time at DISNEY!!! THAT will be the BEST part of it all!!*

A Mecation sounds awesome!! A resort too, now that's something to try one day!

I'm not ready yet. Friends try to get me to go out without DS. I don't want to go anywhere without him. I work when he's with his dad. I'm sad the day/hours before he goes with his dad. This past weekend I didn't work, so I got a pedicure and shopped for DS while he was away.

When DS stops nursing, I'm going to have a glass of wine at night. That will be my "me" time. Lol

Aww, I understand. My daughter is 4 and I JUST started getting out of the house.LOL!

What is this "me time" of which you speak?

Unless I'm at work or have to be somewhere I can't take my children, I pretty much always have at least one of them. My daughter is starting to go do things with a friend or have activities so at those time I am with ds. The exception is when we are at church and they go to children's church while I remain in the regular service. I really don't get invited anywhere since my sitter I used for school closings or other times went to college that is how it's been. I have time to myself after they go to bed.

But the times are changing. Ds starts Kindergarten this fall and they will be at the same school for the next 2 years. The facility where they will be in after school care works differently than most in that it's also a drop in center and stays open longer. For aftercare, you get 4 hours from the time they get on the van at school. They help with homework and they will serve them dinner for a small extra fee. So I joined a gym nearby so I can go workout a couple of days during the week and on Saturdays.

Curious too as to what other moms and dads do for alone time.

That'll be some nice mom time, exercising after work!

I don't really do me time. I have used a Kids Night Out a few times, drop him off at a play gym for 3 hours on Friday evening, but it means he's up way later than normal and sets the weekend up poorly since he doesn't sleep in to make up for that! Even then I just do groceries or watch something on TV, nothing too exciting. This summer my parents took him for most of a week and that was so strange! I got to sleep in, watch grown up tv whenever I wanted, didn't have to cook healthy meals and missed him a lot. During the school year I get up at 4:30 so I can exercise before he gets up (at 6:30) and I use a before/after school program he enjoys. I will go home from work, spend 30 minutes on whatever I want, including dinner prep, cleaning, etc, and then go get him as he is always having fun with his friends. And of course, after he goes to bed, I get a bit of time, but I go to bed early so I can get up early. I don't go out without him though, unless I'm off from work for whatever reason, then I'll do groceries without him or something like that. Oh, and birthday parties! Now that he is old enough to go to drop off birthday parties I get a few hours while he's at those (maybe once a month).

That sounds liked fun, watching grown up tv! LOL! When my daughter is with my mom, it's nice to watch adult shows.LOL!

 

[MsMamaBear]

My kids go with their Dad every other Sunday from 11:30-7 and every other Monday until 7. On Mondays I am working until 2:30 or 3:30, so I might have a few hours after work on those days. Otherwise, every other Sunday I am dropping them off to him after church, and then I have until 7 to do something. I usually utilize those times to get my grocery shopping done, mow the lawn, or get things done around the house, uninterrupted (which is a treat really!). I rarely go out to eat and I NEVER go out to "do" anything, like movies or out with friends. My social time is usually taking my kids over to my sister's house to play with her kids and having coffee and chatting. My mother-in-law will once in a great while have my daughter overnight, and she would take my son too, but he is still prone to croup and needs a breathing treatment to cope, so she is too nervous to deal with that so he stays with me. It does help though, because then there is no fighting between the two while she is gone.

At the moment I really have no desire to start up a relationship. I can MAYBE see this changing as my children get older and have more independent lives. Sometimes I do wish I had a bit more time to myself, but really it's not going to last forever. My kids will grow up and not need so much of my time, so I am trying to enjoy what I can with them now. That's why I am looking forward to our cruise next year.

That's awesome you have a sister nearby and with kids as well! I hope my sister has some soon so I can experience that!

 

[sharona]

I have a monthly dinner with girlfriends (we call it First Fridays) and we try to get together for a long weekend without the kids at least once/year. Next up Nashville Memorial Day 2016!!! I also have a monthly massage membership at Massage Envy which I usually follow with a mani/pedi and a nice take out dinner from anywhere I want without worrying about what DD12 wants/doesn't like/feels like eating! Having the monthly standing appointment forces me to keep the "me" time without the guilt. My SIL is kind enough to hang out with DD on those nights. I return the favor with my nephew13 - when they want a date night he'll hang out with DD and I. Can't really call it babysitting these days or the kids get all bent out of shape. My SIL doesn't have any girls so this is her girly time, she and DD usually go to the mall or make cookies.

If I have any unexpected time to myself, I usually go to the movies. It's nice to see a grown up movie and I have no problem with going by myself if no one else is free.

 

[leshunlenese]

I feel so guilty going out. I would much rather stay in, watch a movie, and eat junk food with my son. While he still thinks I am cool and ALL. Besides i work four 10 hours a week 2nd shift. During the school year i wake up to take my son to school and by the time i get off work he is sleep plus a prn job where i work every other Saturday and Sunday. I am seriously thinking about letting that job go. im so tired! If i go out with friends it is usually to dinner and i take my son with me!

 

[MommyMeNDisney]

I have a monthly dinner with girlfriends (we call it First Fridays) and we try to get together for a long weekend without the kids at least once/year. Next up Nashville Memorial Day 2016!!! I also have a monthly massage membership at Massage Envy which I usually follow with a mani/pedi and a nice take out dinner from anywhere I want without worrying about what DD12 wants/doesn't like/feels like eating! Having the monthly standing appointment forces me to keep the "me" time without the guilt. My SIL is kind enough to hang out with DD on those nights. I return the favor with my nephew13 - when they want a date night he'll hang out with DD and I. Can't really call it babysitting these days or the kids get all bent out of shape. My SIL doesn't have any girls so this is her girly time, she and DD usually go to the mall or make cookies.

If I have any unexpected time to myself, I usually go to the movies. It's nice to see a grown up movie and I have no problem with going by myself if no one else is free.

Prior to DS my friends and I would have Girls Night In once a month. Each of us would take turns hosting it. The theme was totally up to the host for the month. I always chose comedy night and made my highly requested signature cocktail. We would watch stand up comedy DVDs, eat dinner, drink adult beverages and laugh the night away. One of my friends chose spa night. She hired a masseuse to come to her place and give us all massages. It was great! The host also gave small gifts to everyone at the end of the night. I usually gave a small bottle of wine with a special Girls Night In label.

Fun times! When DS is older and I'm ready, we need to resume our Girls Night In get togethers.

 

[sharona]

Prior to DS my friends and I would have Girls Night In once a month. Each of us would take turns hosting it. The theme was totally up to the host for the month. I always chose comedy night and made my highly requested signature cocktail. We would watch stand up comedy DVDs, eat dinner, drink adult beverages and laugh the night away. One of my friends chose spa night. She hired a masseuse to come to her place and give us all massages. It was great! The host also give small gifts to everyone at the end of the night. I usually have a small bottle of wine with a special Girls Night In label.

Fun times! When DS is older and I'm ready, we need to resume our Girls Night In get togethers.

That sounds wonderful! We usually eat out because it's a nice break from cooking/cleaning up.

 

[MsMamaBear]

I have a monthly dinner with girlfriends (we call it First Fridays) and we try to get together for a long weekend without the kids at least once/year. Next up Nashville Memorial Day 2016!!! I also have a monthly massage membership at Massage Envy which I usually follow with a mani/pedi and a nice take out dinner from anywhere I want without worrying about what DD12 wants/doesn't like/feels like eating! Having the monthly standing appointment forces me to keep the "me" time without the guilt. My SIL is kind enough to hang out with DD on those nights. I return the favor with my nephew13 - when they want a date night he'll hang out with DD and I. Can't really call it babysitting these days or the kids get all bent out of shape. My SIL doesn't have any girls so this is her girly time, she and DD usually go to the mall or make cookies.

If I have any unexpected time to myself, I usually go to the movies. It's nice to see a grown up movie and I have no problem with going by myself if no one else is free.

That sounds awesome! And awesome you have a babysitter nearby! Nothing like a little time with friends just being out and enjoying talking.

 

[DisneyHeather]

My moms live three and a half hours away and we go visit about once a month. Usually my little sisters will watch my son and my mom and step mom and I go see a movie or something. I also work four 10 hour days a week so I'll take him to daycare about one Friday every other month to get my hair done but otherwise we're pretty much together.

 

[MsMamaBear]

I feel so guilty going out. I would much rather stay in, watch a movie, and eat junk food with my son. While he still thinks I am cool and ALL. Besides i work four 10 hours a week 2nd shift. During the school year i wake up to take my son to school and by the time i get off work he is sleep plus a prn job where i work every other Saturday and Sunday. I am seriously thinking about letting that job go. im so tired! If i go out with friends it is usually to dinner and i take my son with me!

Oh, wow. Your schedule is booked! I know you do spend the time off with your son! What is do you do? Your job, I mean.

 

[jahber]

My husband takes our kids (11, 8, and 1) to his mom's house for 4 hours once a week. My husband is Indian, so his mom cooks some food for the whole family (minus me ) and they have a great time with his brother and his family. I used to feel bad, but we homeschool, so there is basically no time when I don't have kids around. I'm a classic introvert, so my husband recognizes that this time is essential. I also run 4 or 5 times a week as "me" time. My husband stays with the kids and I take care of myself. And of course, he will randomly take the kids out or send me out on my own. He's their dad--he needs time with them without me, too.
I also took a long weekend for the Disney 24-hour weekend. Since we live in Orlando, and I'm still nursing, it made getting away possible without having to wean the little guy. I NEEDED that weekend!

 

[MsMamaBear]

My moms live three and a half hours away and we go visit about once a month. Usually my little sisters will watch my son and my mom and step mom and I go see a movie or something. I also work four 10 hour days a week so I'll take him to daycare about one Friday every other month to get my hair done but otherwise we're pretty much together.

That sounds nice! Especially seeing adult movies! And awesome little sisters babysitting for you.

 

[leshunlenese]

Oh, wow. Your schedule is booked! I know you do spend the time off with your son! What is do you do? Your job, I mean.

I am a respiratory therapist! Got off early today and of course I am with my baby watching sponge bob while i am on the dis!

 

[jevs]

I went back to study so I guess that is my 'me time' - I must remind myself of this in the middle of assignment writing

I have 100% care of the kids as their dad lives in a different state so they only see him a couple of times a year for any length of time. I usually just take everyone with me wherever I go, but they are also older so there isn't that constant mum, mum, mum going on so I at least can enjoy a phone call in peace