What can I do?, anything?

[Serena]

My dd was supposed to be home a long time ago. She had to stay after, but I know not this late.
With her ex stalking her, I'm scared to death.

But, knowing my dd she is likely at a friends house and just didn't bother to call.
Even if she is with the ex, I have no idea where to look.

I don't know what to think or what to do. Since she is almost 18 I'm pretty sure the police won't do anything, not until after 24 hours.

But in the mean time,

 

[Dan Murphy]

Does Brit have a cell phone, Laurie?

 

[Pop Daddy]

I find getting up and looking out the window every 2 minutes helps. She is alright, anit she allways

 

[Serena]

never mind she's home.

 

[Dan Murphy]

 

[shep]

 

[HauntedMansionGeek]

*HUGS* for a scared mom.

I'm glad she made it home to you.

 

[aunt lissa]

Whew! Glad she is home safely w/ mom!!

 

[snoopy]

Laurie, perhaps Dan's idea of getting Brit a cell phone is a good one, under the circumstances.

And as I told you the other day, if this guy is stalking her, you CAN get a restraining order, regardless of her age.

Good luck.

 

[Serena]

Thank you all.
I don't know when I've ever been that scared, but it was just another instance where a teenager didn't think. She decided to go to a friends house and do homework. She didn't ask permission, she didn't tell me she was going and she never called to let me know where she was or when she was coming home.

Can you guess how fast you can go from being terrified they are hurt, to wanting to hurt them yourself? Oh, let's see. How about in the time it takes for her to realize you've been crying to finish saying "Woh, what's the deal?" Oh, about ten seconds of her walking in the door.

 

[Serena]

Snoopy, I just need to get a phone for her. Her's was stolen and I haven't replaced it yet.
And they told me he has to threaten her before I can get one. So far, he's done everything but that.
I was told to document everything, which I knew that, I don't know why I didn't think of it earlier. And to get a tracer from the phone company. I've got caller ID now and can block calls, but he's calling from every friend or family member he has.
And the following us, as long as he doesn't trespass on our property, they say he can. So far, he hasn't done that when I was home.

 

[CRB#33]

Laurie.

I wish children could step into our minds for just one day.

Would make parenting a whole different story.

I'm glad she's safe.

 

[tater bug]

I'm glad she's safe. Sending more prayers your way.

 

[Lanshark]

I definitely agree with getting her a cell phone. Also have you thought about changing your phone number. I know it's hard with a teenager because they give it out but it may slow him down a bit. I've read some of your posts but what exactly is he doing. Following her, harassing her or both? I assume his parents are aware of the situation.

 

[Serena]

Missy, I love your signature.

Marcie, let's see.
He won't stop calling,
He's treatened to kill himself if she breaks up with him (he's tried twice, already),
he's come to the house,
he's went to school when it was time for her to come home. One day he started an argument with another student. To make him calm down she agreed to talk with him in his car. When she tried to get out, he wouldn't let her. Until 5 hours later.
He's went to her job.
He was waiting at her job the other night and followed us home. He didn't pull into the driveway though.
He's having his friends call to make her talk with him.
He has friends watching her all day at school and they report to him everything she does.
He called me one night, blaming me for everything.

I think that's it so far.

Oh, his parents. Well, his dad's in jail again. He's in jail more often than not. His mom only cares if she doesn't have to do anything. Occassionally she'll remember she's a mom, but that doesn't happen often.
He's had a very rough life and I've tried to help as much as I could including letting him sleep in my rv for a couple months when he was homeless. I'm done with him.

 

[snoopy]

That is terrible that you can't get a restraining order on him. Not to scare you, but what are they waiting for, him to hurt her first???

(want me to have John come scare the life out of him? He's good at that! )

 

[preshi]

Can't not letting her out of the car for 5 hours be considered false imprisionment or somethign like that?

Dh and I had to get a restraining order on an ex boyfriend of mine, while DH and I were dating, who said he was going to kill both of us and then proceeded to cut the brake line on my car and slash my tires. I assume he didnt really want to hurt me as that was a weird combination but you never know.




to you and your daughter I'm keeping you in my thoughts that this all stops.

 

[Serena]

Yes, he has to hurt her first. I could do something about his keeping in his car, but she insists that she could have gotten out if she really wanted to.

But ooooh, John sounds good to me. I just doubt that anything would work. He's hurt himself to get her attention before.

 

[Serena]

Yeah preshi, it is. But she keeps telling me that she could have gotten out if she really wanted to. She just doesn't want to see him in jail. She still loves him, but she knows he's got a problem.

 

[Keli]

I think you are right, if your dd claims that she could have gotten out of the car if she really tried then I doubt the police or anyone else would take that as an unlawful imprisonment situation.
Maybe you should have a long talk with your dd about this situation. I wonder if she realizes that by talking to him and getting in his car that she might be escalating the situation. If he's having some success with these tactics (albiet limited success) there is no reason for him to stop unless he just gets tired of the whole thing and moves on. And the guys like him seem like they rarely get tired of stalking ex girlfriends.