OP here - just to give a little more info.
First, I would never presume to try to use or take a benefit that was for military only and was rightfully earned by them through their military service. I have too much respect for our soldiers to do anything like that. That’s exactly why I asked the question.
@jen7233 is correct; the place I asked about is a community center run by MWR. This is what it advertises on their website:
“Family and MWR welcomes you to The Lee Club
Let us host your special event
Wedding, Graduation, Birthday/Sweet 16 Party, Military/FRG Function, Corporate Party, Job Fair, Conference, Anniversary, Bridal Shower, or Baby Shower”
“Corporate Party” made me think that the facility was open to the public or that a qualifying military member could sponsor such an event.
Second, my Air Force retired father-in-law would be over the moon and so very proud to do this for a family member. I don’t even want to mention it to him because he’d be crushed if one of the kids picked a different venue. He is incredibly proud of his military service.
Third, nope no engaged kids yet. I expect that’s a couple of years away. DH has friends who are helping plan children’s weddings now. He told me last night we need to start taking notes and saving! We are big planners when it comes to the financial stuff. The place I asked about was mentioned by a friend during a general discussion about venues, so I checked it out.
Fourth, my kids will get to plan their own weddings. If they ask my opinion I’ll share it; however, the choices will be up to them. BUT since DH and I will be paying for the bulk of it, I’d like to be able to say, “This is how much money we have to spend, you could afford 150 people at this place but no open bar, or a 100 people at this place with an open bar, or 125 at this place with just beer and wine.” DH and I are trying to gauge how much things cost, so we can save enough for them to have options.
Thank you to all the folks who responded to my question. The info about ID to enter the base is something to check out for sure. Lastly, to those military family who answered - Thank you for your service!!!!