We were shocked at the parks

[grimley1968]

The last time we were at disney (2002) I heard a kid whining and asking her mom for a drink, she was thirsty, the mom said "shut up and swallow your spit". That is something that has burned a hole in my memory and I will never forget it. I felt so bad for that child, and relieved at the same time that my kids will never have a mom like that.

I think this is a bit quick to judge the mother of these kids. Maybe what she said was a bit harsh. But how do you know the kid hadn't just had a drink, or maybe wasted much of a $2 drink earlier? My DD's do this kind of thing all the time. My oldest DD probably drinks 10 cups of milk a day, and then will complain that she's "thirsty" 10 minutes after finishing her last cup. When I offer her some water or juice to really quench her thirst, she refuses. A lot of people say, or even do, things in the parks that look terrible in the snapshot image others see of them. But it's not really fair to adjudge a mom negatively and have a "hole burned" in your memory because of that one moment. There could have been a whole lot more to that story than what you saw.

There's another thread close to this one about having "meltdowns" in the parks. Many of those "meltdowns" sound similar to what in this thread would be described as "shocking" behavior. I think this, and many other examples cited in this thread, could simply have been little temporary meltdowns by people who are normally very good parents/kids/citizens.

 

[PreppyPolyMom]

I think this is a bit quick to judge the mother of these kids. Maybe what she said was a bit harsh. But how do you know the kid hadn't just had a drink, or maybe wasted much of a $2 drink earlier? My DD's do this kind of thing all the time. My oldest DD probably drinks 10 cups of milk a day, and then will complain that she's "thirsty" 10 minutes after finishing her last cup. When I offer her some water or juice to really quench her thirst, she refuses. A lot of people say, or even do, things in the parks that look terrible in the snapshot image others see of them. But it's not really fair to adjudge a mom negatively and have a "hole burned" in your memory because of that one moment. There could have been a whole lot more to that story than what you saw.

There's another thread close to this one about having "meltdowns" in the parks. Many of those "meltdowns" sound similar to what in this thread would be described as "shocking" behavior. I think this, and many other examples cited in this thread, could simply have been little temporary meltdowns by people who are normally very good parents/kids/citizens.

Well what she said was nasty and harsh and I don't know why I remember that so vividly, but I do.

 

[Priorityonecb]

"...my eyes got huge and my voice got very quiet and I said "Are we about to have a problem?"

Our girls respond instantly to raised eyebrows with a deeper toned, calm "Excuuuse me???" (extra u's necessary for effect! )

Children do not need to be hit to learn respect for thier parents or be disciplined people. My dd's are 15 and 9, they are respectful and watchful of their behavior 95% of the time. The other 5% can be handled effectively with both of our dignities intact.

I too would have been upset with the "Shut up and swallow your spit" remark! Maybe because I know my girls would not ask for a drink unless they were thirsty...so that is my frame of reference. I would never deny my child a drink if they were thirsty or food if they were hungry...not only is that neglectful...but also a recipe for ill behavior. I'd be cranky too if it was hot and I was thirsty and noone would listen to my need. I also know that by the time your body gives a physical sign of thirst, you are already heading towards dehydration.

 

[grimley1968]

I too would have been upset with the "Shut up and swallow your spit" remark! Maybe because I know my girls would not ask for a drink unless they were thirsty...so that is my frame of reference. I would never deny my child a drink if they were thirsty or food if they were hungry...not only is that neglectful...but also a recipe for ill behavior. I'd be cranky too if it was hot and I was thirsty and noone would listen to my need. I also know that by the time your body gives a physical sign of thirst, you are already heading towards dehydration.

The key phrase is "frame of reference". We do not know what was going on "behind the scenes." We do not know that the child was dehydrated just because she was whining and wanted a drink (the above poster's own words). The child may have just wanted the sugar rush from a soft drink, or just something else to do. I've probably said worse things to my DD's and I know my parents said worse things to me. Imagine a 7 YO (me) riding all the way to WDW from Kentucky in a dark blue 1973 Buick Electra 225 with two parents who smoke, with bad a/c in the back, riding on the "hump seat" because your 2 older siblings have longer legs, and being told that "No, we will not stop at this rest stop for you to go to the bathroom. You'll just have to hold it for a few more minutes." Now, if a conscientious fly had been in the car and heard that, he may have assumed I had abusive, neglectful parents and assumed my bladder would be harmed. But in the larger context, I was just bored to tears (I think this ride took place before I-75 was finished throughout all of Georgia, and we had to take US 27 down - not a pleasant ride in the least) and wanted a change of scenery and was just using this as a way of getting out of the car. Also, I had just gone about 15 minutes before.

Most things people have listed surely do look bad, but most are tiny little moments that might not tell us anything about the overall relationship, like my real-life example in the previous paragraph.

 

[Priorityonecb]

I do realize every story has two sides...and I am empathetic to *most parents when children loose their minds and act less than angelic in public.

The "Shut up and swallow your spit" though...that just seems downright mean and disrespectful. I agree that the child may very well have been manipulating...could go both ways. "Shut up and swallow your spit" still doesn't seem the adult, mature, kind way to address either scenario.

 

[luvthemouse71]

Ha Ha-this thread reminded me of when my sis and I were at WDW in July 05.
It was SOOOO hot and humid and the crowds were ridiculous..We actually got into an argument waiting in line for IASW ...Long story short, we took a couple of rides on TTA and got something to drink and both our moods improved..I learned 2 things on that trip 1) never go to WDW in July and 2) pace yourself-vacations are supposed to be relaxing.

 

[jann1033]

Unfortunately, people have such high expectations for everything now days. They expect to have a perfect vacation at WDW and don't want their kids to mess up their plans. The kids are on overload and are often unpleasant. It really goes both ways.

i think you've gotten something here

i havent' read all the posts but do think it's a combo of things...the quest for a perfect trip, the fact that today since both parents often need to work they rarely spend 24/7 with their kids who might have a tendency to act up to get attention or maybe act that way anyway and since it isn't 24/7 normally it doesn't get to the parents so much. the fact that kids are kids and have a knack of knowing how to say just what mom and dad do not want to hear right then the fact who knows what has gone on for the past week, yr, life with the kids, the fact you can't spank your kids in public now( i said spank not beat imo 2 different things) with out having someone comment on it( daughter was just talking about this when gbaby threw her first official royal fit in grocery store last week cause she was being "2" and basically got away with it cause being 2 doesn't always include listening hard to judge from a brief second about someone's parenting skills

T
I often wonder if people talked or posted on a message board after seeing my two year old daughter throwing a fit in the Magic Kingdom on the ground rolling around in her Cinderella dress. We said we'd never bring them that young, but with grandparents we figured four adults could handle two children ( 2 and 6). She bucks and kicks and flails her body, screeching and turning red. She wanted to got up the castle steps but it was roped off for Cinderellabration. I hope the people seeing her tantrum realized that the same little girl went on to have a great day riding in the stroller and riding the carousel and enjoying her Mickey-shaped lollipop.
If you can do survive Disney with a tantrum prone two-year-old, all the future trips will seem easy.

this is pretty close to my granddaughter in the store last week, except she also threw all the cherrio boxes off the shelf and climbed in behind them ( she said she would have just left but wasn't able to ) baby isn't really bad, just into everything and that lovely 2 yr old temperament

however she is just like her mother was at that age so there is hope so i do agree, consistent firmness solves a ton of problems.....eventually there were definitely times though when i thought we'd never get through it and her personality now is very sweet...go figure

also there is a general change in attitudes of kids...my parents spanked but were not abusive by any stretch but we respected them..it amazes me how many little preschool kids talk back, put their parents down, have real attitudes( i mean way beyond the usual testing all kids do) yikes! would hate to see them in 10 yrs! and i think i would be nutty if my kids did that all day everyday( although i really don't think I'd let them get away with it any way)

 

[missypie]

While I belive you I have *heard* that the people at DLP are really rude. The cast members aren't as magical and there is smoke everywhere.

I don't know if that is true or now (after all I only "heard" it.)

It does sound like even if many of the guests there might not be as polite to others (especailly those americans) they are to their own familes. Always a good thing.

The employees at DLP do not give American style "service with a smile". No one at DLP was rude to us, but you certainly don't get lots of smiles like in Florida. But the other guests were not rude.

 

[SueRS]

I could never understand why in the world families insist on staying in the parks so many hours. People say they need to get their monies worth.. how is a cranky, screaming, tired... turning violent ... family.....getting your monies worth? getting in less attractions and rides would equate to a better vacation if everyone is happy.

When we went to DLR, we tried the afternoon nap. DS 7 didn't want to, everyone else did. DS was mean and cranky going back after rest time (because he didn't). What do you do at that point? Sit in a hotel room and be horrible or hope he stops the attidude and will be nice.

 

[Alice Sr.]

Child Protective Services could have a field day in the parks..

Isn't that the truth. It makes me crazy. I would love to rip into the parents but I'm always afraid the cowards will take it out on the kids when I'm out of sight.

 

[G's mommy]

While I belive you I have *heard* that the people at DLP are really rude. The cast members aren't as magical and there is smoke everywhere.

I don't know if that is true or now (after all I only "heard" it.)

It does sound like even if many of the guests there might not be as polite to others (especailly those americans) they are to their own familes. Always a good thing.

We were at DLP in November and did not find any of this to be true. It was a slow day, so maybe in peak times there is more smoke. The French just have a different style, more subdued and they do not make eye contact or smile at strangers. You find this to be true all around Paris, not just at DLP. We found the CM's to be very friendly if you engaged them in conversation. I would not hesitate to visit DLP in the future.

 

[Micca]

I've seen families and couples having Jerry Springer moments at WDW. Maybe admission tickets aren't expensive enough to keep the riff-raff out.

 

[the other micki]

It might be Disney, but it ain't Heaven!

 

[zookeeper]

If you were to ask my kids what is the #1 rule when we are out in public their automatic response would be ... "Never embarass Mommy."

I have to say, I am out with my kids often whether it be shopping, to the park or on vacation and it always makes me most proud when someone compliments me on my children's behaviour. They're not always angels, but when they are it's nice that it's appreciated. So often we hear from people ready to slam parents for the unacceptable behaviour of their uncontrollable offspring, but do these same people ever think to compliment someone on their well-behaved children?? It's nice to hear positives every so often.

 

[DisneyPhD]

The employees at DLP do not give American style "service with a smile". No one at DLP was rude to us, but you certainly don't get lots of smiles like in Florida. But the other guests were not rude.

Maybe G's mommy can answer this too.


How about the cig smoke issue? I know if I went somewhere that ther isn't non smoking laws it would just drive me nuts. One cig from another person sitting next to me can ruin an entire meal. One reason I LOVE WDW!

 

[maxiesmom]

Maybe the next time you see a family spazzing out, hand them a copy of UG, tell them - try this next time! Or hand the out-of-control parent some chocolate!
.

Make mine dark chocolate please! And if we are in Epicot a little glass of wine would help too!

 

[lsutigger2]

Okay, please forgive me if this has been discussed, I didn't read all of the posts -

But something else that really bothers me is when parents/adults insist that a child ride something they are clearly frightened of. I've often wanted to volunteer to sit with the child, so the adults could ride.

My thought, and it is JMHO, is that trips to WDW with kids should be all about the kid(s). That's why when we take my 16 month old greatniece to WDW in Nov we've also invited her parents, grandparents (my DB/DSIL), and her aunt and us, her greataunt and uncle. Figure that there will always be an adult willing to take care of her and her needs at any point in time.

My story: I was in line solo to ride Soarin' and there was a family in front of me. The littlest one was having some issues, so I struck up a conversation with him. Taking is slow and easy since I am sensitive to parents "wishes" in situations like that. You know, the talking to strangers thing. I ended up having a great conversation with all the family members and it made waiting in a very long line much more pleasant. Sometimes a "solution" to a situation can something really easy.

Remember to enjoy making all those family memories!

 

[PreppyPolyMom]

Okay, please forgive me if this has been discussed, I didn't read all of the posts -

But something else that really bothers me is when parents/adults insist that a child ride something they are clearly frightened of. I've often wanted to volunteer to sit with the child, so the adults could ride.

My thought, and it is JMHO, is that trips to WDW with kids should be all about the kid(s). That's why when we take my 16 month old greatniece to WDW in Nov we've also invited her parents, grandparents (my DB/DSIL), and her aunt and us, her greataunt and uncle. Figure that there will always be an adult willing to take care of her and her needs at any point in time.

My story: I was in line solo to ride Soarin' and there was a family in front of me. The littlest one was having some issues, so I struck up a conversation with him. Taking is slow and easy since I am sensitive to parents "wishes" in situations like that. You know, the talking to strangers thing. I ended up having a great conversation with all the family members and it made waiting in a very long line much more pleasant. Sometimes a "solution" to a situation can something really easy.

Remember to enjoy making all those family memories!

Back in the 70's when I was about 5 or 6 we went to Disney and stayed at the Poly. (I kinda remember this, but my dad always reminded me of it)My mom and I were at the pool, at the Poly and we were at the top of the slide and I got scared and didn't want to go down and my mom said, you are going and pushed me and down I went!! The lifeguard (I guess they had one then) blew his whistle and got on to my mom.

 

[irishbosoxfan]

I've seen families and couples having Jerry Springer moments at WDW. Maybe admission tickets aren't expensive enough to keep the riff-raff out.

So what your saying is that Disney should raise the prices to keep out everyone you consider "riff-raff" because of course anyone who has a disobedient child or an argument on Disney would be by your standards "riff-raff"

So let me ask what would the admission have to be in order for you and yours to not make an appearance??

 

[maxiesmom]

But something else that really bothers me is when parents/adults insist that a child ride something they are clearly frightened of. I've often wanted to volunteer to sit with the child, so the adults could ride.

I may be one of the adults you see "insisting" that a child gets on a ride. I have been to many amusement parks with my sis and her 3 kids. My nephew, now 14, has been forced onto many rides. He is always scared the first time he gets on anything, but has loved everything once he has gone. If we didn't drag him on he would ride nothing. Don't be so quick to judge. Sometimes the parent (or aunt) really does know best.