We put the fun in dsyfunctional...even at WDW

[amypoppins]

Loving you report!! Please tell me we're going to hear about the wedding too!!
I have three G-daughters ages 12, 14 and 16 and I've been trying to convince at least one that WDW was the only place they could possibly get
married but their mothers have assured them Nana would get over it if they choose another location (Nana's not so sure)

I wasn't planning to write about the wedding since it DIDN"T get to happen at WDW! Maybe I'll write up a short version (there was the incident with one of the groomsman's girlfriends starting a family feud between the aunts on both sides) and I can send it to you! It was very sweet of you to say so. And I say let the first two granddaughters get married where they want--then start laying the guilt on the last one. SOMEONE has to get married there!

 

[amypoppins]

I have one son on the spectrum and one who has alot of the same characteristics- so I am familiar with THE LOOK!
Loving the story. I feel like our nontraditional family trips are maybe more traditional than I thought... Thanks for sharing!

Hey, traditional-schmaditional I say. Every family is just doing what they do. A big hats off to you and yours for making the magic for your family. It's one thing to think that going on a big family trip might be hard--but it's another to jump in KNOWING it could be really hard. Thanks for tagging along with mine!

 

[Rozz]

This TR is definitely NOT one of THOSE Christmas cards!

I too, use to think it a myth that children would eat salad. Then, one of my daughter's friends got a plate full of salad stuff at a buffet restaurant we went to before going to a movie. She ate raw broccoli like it was french fries. Totally weirded me out.

 

[amypoppins]

Here we are...Dad "I'm-going-to-need-a-nap-soon", Mom "Easy-Spirit and can-I-get-a-picture-for-Facebook?", Chip and Dale, and little sister-"All you do is show up"

 

[amypoppins]

A word about lunch at Pizza Planet—despite the lack of Hidden Valley Ranch, they still had packets of salad dressing out and available to the general public, the non-HVR included. My sister wisely swiped a few extra, and in a moment of desperation the next day they came in handy.

So, it’s after lunch and everyone has been fed, hydrated, and briefly rested. We should have been collectively set except that my father also smokes. Therefore, all needs have not been met until the nicotine is addressed. My dad goes off to find the smoking section, my mother tags along with him, and we drift into a shop.
(Can I have an Indiana Jones whip? No.)

And now…..we lose each other. We don’t physically lay eyes on my parents until forty-five minutes later. Apparently a cell phone only works to locate your party when ALL members of the party have their phones turned on.

After we met back up we proceeded to break every single touring guide rule there is. I don’t know why we did this. We’ve put the time in, we’ve earned our ears in these parks, we knew what we SHOULD have done. Hit an area’s major attractions, and move on to the next adjacent area. Consult showtimes and plan accordingly. Know where the restrooms are, the restaurants for drinks, KNOW WHERE THE EMERGENCY EXITS ARE AT ALL TIMES. (Miming flight attendant gestures)

I can’t explain our rule breaking, except that I blame proper lack of planning.
My sister blames the heat.
My mother blames my father.

At this point we began to wildly criss-cross the park according to the whims of any person that spoke up to suggest an attraction. We split up so that half the group would go to Lights/Motor/Action and the other half to Beauty and the Beast and lost another half an hour trying to find each other again.
(Really, on each cell phone there is a RED button and a GREEN button. Push accordingly)

We did NOT leave the park and take a mid-afternoon break. We should lose 10 Ear points alone for that one.

It was decided that we could grab some dinner, just finish the park, and go. We weren’t staying for Fantasmic or fireworks, so it would be fine.

Now, we foolishly decided to see Muppets 3D before dinner. We’re standing in the shaded part of the line discussing the restaurant options-with no reservations on the books, and we look at the map and decide-

“Sunscreen!”
‘We’re in the shade. And almost done.”
“Sunscreen!”
“I think the bottle’s empty.”

…and we decide to try for 50’s Prime Time because it was on the way out. This was a gamble, it all hinges on park volume if you can manage a walk-up with a short wait.

Into Muppets we go. I love the Muppets. I watched The Muppet Show when I was a kid, all the specials, and I was really happy when Disney partnered with Muppets. And Muppet Vision 3D makes me laugh out loud every single time I see it.

But I am not my sons.

Muppet 3D is great because it’s an immersive sensory experience. The 3D movie effects, the smells, the air, the bubbles, water, all of it.
But for my boys, walking down the street can be an overwhelming sensory experience, much less an attraction that is designed to put you into sensory overload.
So, following the Muppet movie the boys were officially “going bonkers”. (My sister’s term-a seemingly appropriate Muppet term)

Logic would dictate that we might simply leave the park now, but I believe that I’ve demonstrated that we threw logic out the window sometime in the early afternoon. ( Only a few stray ideas clung to me in the heat-“Can I have a light saber, Grandpa?” “NO NO NO,” shouted the mother from across the way.)

My sister trots on ahead to Prime Time Café to find out about the time. We straggle over, limping, deflated, and barely controlling two little people very nearly coming out of their skin. I’m pretty sure I was against this plan, but in the interest of full disclosure I have to admit to not recalling what I said, except “Stop! Don’t hit your brother! Do your breathing exercises! EVERYONE CALM DOWN!”

The good news was they said they could seat us quickly, about 5 minutes. Fantastic!
The bad news was that Dad said this was just enough time to nip out for a cigarette. Super Fantastic!

He promised he would be close, because the server made it very, VERY clear that all members of the party had to be present to be seated. Not, All-members-but-the-one-that-nipped-out-for-the-cigarette-present to be seated. No, every single member.

(Can I just vote that we cut people some slack on this rule in WDW? If you’re staring down a group that’s soaked to the skin with sweat, sunburned –someone used up ALL the sunscreen- and barely hanging on to two wild horses straining at the bit-maybe you could just go ahead and seat them and bring the last one along later)

Well, he may have been close-but it wasn’t close enough. Our name got called and he was nowhere to be found. My mother tried to call his cell phone. My sister sent a text. I willed him to appear out of thin air with every fiber of my being. He did not.

Our waiter appeared and began the funny bit with telling us that the WHOLE PARTY HAD TO BE PRESENT TO BE SEATED, and I vaguely remember him shaking his finger at us. Of course this is the charm of the 50’s Prime Time Café. Your waiter scolds and cajoles and teases. I think it works better when you aren’t swearing in your head at everyone.

So, we waited. The waiter waited. The waiter began to nervously watch our desperate attempts to control the boys. Still no Dad.

My sister took off for parts unknown to find him. The smoking area was close, right. Right??! BY EVERYTHING THAT’S HOLY IN THE WORLD LET HER FIND HIM CLOSE BY.

A minute passed. My father walked in. The waiter brightened, and then we looked around. My sister was still gone. I think the waiter was going to shake his finger again and then thought better of it. That’s when he walked away and said he’d be back.

Eventually my sister showed up, and some words were exchanged about awful habits that cause cancer and wreak havoc on seating, and we really should have been in a parking lot.

The waiter returns and takes us all in and leads us to our table. And that’s when things went downhill.

 

[amypoppins]

allright...let's try the photo thing again.

 

[amypoppins]

Little sister and her husband came to visit over Labor Day and I made her some special treats to celebrate her birthday. I got the ideas and directions from Bakerella and Disneyfamily.com. They were easier to make than walking up Main Street toward Fantasy Land--after Wishes has ended.

 

[amypoppins]

(Sound of gavel rapping)

This hearing is now in session. Please note that all parties are present. The defendant, amypoppins, her lead counsel-the Cheshire Cat, the court stenographer-Uncle Donald-the presiding judges-Huey, Dewey, & Louie, and some suspicious characters in the gallery. I see you up there, Hook! I haven’t forgotten about last time! Those curtains were very expensive!

Please note for the record that the defendant’s counsel has disappeared, leaving only his smile behind. I believe a memo was sent regarding this behavior-please send another.

Now, we are here regarding the matter of amypoppins letting her stress levels reach unacceptable levels at the Happiest Place on Earth, specifically at the Hollywood Studios, thereby lowering the overall Happiness meter.

Oh, the Studios are very fun. Have you ever grabbed a sweet at the Starring Rolls Cafe?

I have. Now, amypoppins, were you aware that there was a minimum level of happiness at the Walt Disney World Resort?

Actually, no. I mean, I’m generally very, VERY happy when I’m there. It was just that it had been a long day, and it was hot, and then-

Did you or did you not visit WDW in August? The hottest month of the year?

Uh, yes. I know. But still it can take a toll, Sir Huey, and I-

I’m Sir Dewey. He’s Sir Huey.

Oh, I’m sorry, Sir. Well it’s just that-

I told you all black robes were a mistake. No one can tell us apart.

No one can tell us apart, anyway.

That’s not true. All the cast members and Disney store employees know which is which.

That’s not true either. Not all of them learn the thing about how to tell us apart.

What thing?

You know, the color thing. How “red” is the brightest hue, and dew is blue-that thing.

Well, they should know.

I know. Let’s send a memo.

Great idea.

POP!

Oh good. Please note that lead counsel for the defendant has returned. Mr. Cat, do you have anything to add to the defendant’s defense?

Yes. How many times can you ride It’s a Small World before the song is stuck in your head?

Hmm. (covers microphone) How many times indeed? 5? 6?

Well, is it day or night? Because I can ride it during the day and not have a problem. It’s when I ride later at night and the park is quiet that it sticks.

Are there small children in the party? Because sometimes they will begin to sing it and then,

POP!

Please note that the lead counsel has disappeared. A consensus was not reached, therefore the question cannot be applied to the defense. You were saying, amypoppins?

Uh, yes. Well, you see it had just been a long afternoon, we walked a lot and we were just worn out. We had gone from Toy Story Mania over to Indiana Jones and then to the Backlot Tour, and then-

Toy Story to Indy? Why on earth would you do that?? And then over to Backlot?

Yes, but I think we wanted to skip Backlot and then decided to do it, and we were scheduling around Lights/Motor/Action, and just-

Well, that’s poor planning, that’s what that is.

Indeed.

I concur. Very poor planning indeed. What kind of plan did you have?

Well, uh, we didn’t have much of a plan. And then we kept losing each other, and then we kept getting blocked off by the High School Musical Parade-

Let the record show that the defendant had her routes restricted by the HSM parade. One point for her.

But that is a catchy song.

It IS a catchy song. That summertime one? Yes. One point for the HSM parade.

So, Ms. amypoppins, on to the restaurant if you please. This marks the location of your unhappiest period. What defense do you have for this?

Yes, what defense? It’s a very popular place. It’s very fun. And funny. And excellent meat loaf.

I like the shakes, myself.

Oh, yes. The shakes are delicious, Sir Louie. One point for the 50’s Prime Time Café. This is very important, amypoppins, what do you like from the menu?

I like the roast beef.

Ah yes! The roast beef! One point for amypoppins. You lose a point if you say the tuna casserole, but you didn’t.

Indeed. It’s a trick question we like to use. No one orders the tuna casserole.

I’m sure some people like it…it’s-

No! Are you defending the tuna casserole? You may lose your point for that!

No, no. But if I could just get back to what I was saying-

Yes. About being unhappy there. Wasn’t your waiter funny?

Yes, he was. Of course. I was just feeling very stressed out right then and felt like we should have left the park earlier, because my sons-

Yes, yes. Let the record show that amypoppins sister testified that she said “We should have left sooner” 63 times in ten minutes.

63 times?? That seems excessive.

Yes, she said it was very annoying.

Does she need a hearing?

No, she managed to remain calm and happy. Despite having JUST taken the bar exam! And her wedding in a week!

Really? Her wedding? Was it at WDW?

No, Sanibel.

It’s beautiful there!

I know. A destination wedding is the way to go. You just show up.

I’ve heard that.

Excuse me! Yes, my sister and everyone else managed to decompress-it was just harder for me! And then she made her comment about the air in the room-

What comment?

She told me I was sucking all the air out of the room.

Were you sucking all the air out of the room?

Yes, that’s quite rude. Think of all the families.

No! It was just an expression! You see, we have a relative that sometimes gets VERY stressed out, and she starts slamming things around and the tension just rolls off of her on to everyone else. She doesn’t yell or anything, she’s very quiet, but everyone really feels it. So I told my sister I never wanted to be like that, and if I was she should tell me. So she did. But I mean, it was just a thing I said! I didn’t really mean it! And then she said it when I was really stressed out!

Well, that does sound like the appropriate time to say it.

Yes, she did seem to be following the guidelines you laid out.

Indeed. One point to amypoppins sister for appropriate use of the term, “Sucking the air out of the room.”

I see in the chart that at this point your unhappiness meter dipped to its lowest point.

Yes, I excused myself and went to the bathroom and started to cry.

(The crowd gasps. Even Hook)

Cry??

Yes, I cried.

You cried at Disney World? Not from joy, or excitement?

Yes, I cried. Like, really cried. I was stressed out, maxed out, and tired.

Well, I’m just-I didn’t even know that people could cry there!

This is a shocking development!

Indeed. I’m speechless.

You are? Don’t you have to give a speech later?

Yes. I’m hoping to come across one before then.

Anyway, if I could just finish-I did cry, but then I collected myself and went back to the table and we finished the meal. I was just feeling overwhelmed and had a moment. WDW can be very overwhelming. And especially with my boys.

Yes, yes. She does have a point. It can be very overwhelming.

But crying??

We can’t have that sort of thing going on all the time.

Certainly not.

Well, I didn’t even come close the rest of the trip.

Oh. Well, I do see the meter begin to steadily rise. And it jumps sharply here. What’s that?

Dessert.

Oh. Well, that’s worth a point to you, and a point to the Prime Time Café.

Yes, definitely worth a point for recognizing the value of a good dessert.

So, in summary you seem to have 3 points, I think, Ms. amypoppins. Is that right, Uncle Donald?

$%%^^&&**(*(((

What do you mean you haven’t been recording it all? That’s your whole job!

@##$%^^&+

Fine. Case dismissed due to lack of evidence. Please return to your trip.

Well, the trip is actually over. It was last August.

Well, what on earth are we doing here then?

Gavel rapping.

This court is adjourned. And I see what you’ve done up there, Hook!

 

[amypoppins]

This TR is definitely NOT one of THOSE Christmas cards!

I too, use to think it a myth that children would eat salad. Then, one of my daughter's friends got a plate full of salad stuff at a buffet restaurant we went to before going to a movie. She ate raw broccoli like it was french fries. Totally weirded me out.

thanks for the reasurrance! I always wonder if parents secretly bribe their kids to eat green vegetables in public and then they have ice cream for dinner when they get home.

 

[amypoppins]

So, Day 1 in Walt Disney World, and at the Hollywood Studios, could have gone better. It also could have gone worse. No one was injured, maimed, forced to purchase a Sorcerer’s Hat, or otherwise harmed in the making of this day.

We left the park after dinner. Everyone was tired, and the boys were done. I have to say though, that after they got their medicine at dinner and ate, they really were able to calm down. The restaurant was surprisingly quiet, and we were kind of tucked away by ourselves in a corner. (I can’t imagine why they would have seated us there)

It was earlier, of course. Since we’d had lunch early, we were having dinner early.
(It’s already 4:00?? Shouldn’t we be talking about dinner? I hope all the food isn’t gone.)

Also, our waiter really was great-as usual. Certainly at Prime Time you expect them to be teasing and funny, but I’m sure they also recognize when a group is a bit done in. He was funny with us, but he was really good about the boys-he got their dinner out first, and he kept the teasing to a minimum, in an effort to keep the kids calm too. Sometimes Chip and Dale have a hard time recognizing when someone is teasing-and not-so he hit a good place in the middle.

I wish I could remember his name-but I don’t. The next time we visit I will be sure to note the cast members names in order to recognize them.

It was over dessert that we decided to head out. We caught our bus, and rambled back to Shades of Green. (Dad is retired military)

It was good to be back in the room. I got the boys started on showers pretty quick, trying to make sure we kept to a familiar routine. Of course we had to take care of all the Celebration buttons, first. They got laid out on a nightstand, (Where’s MY button??? My button is missing! Oh no! I can’t ever get another button and…oh. Here it is)

I love the Celebration buttons.

Now, our room was very nice. It was a bigger room-we had 4 adults and 2 kids, but we did lose some floor space to some extras. You see, because of taking all the goodies for the wedding-that meant that some things had to be carried up to the room.

I had made 550 chocolate seashells to use as the wedding favors, to be put in little sand pails at every place setting. Well, those couldn’t stay in the car-so they were carried up and were sitting in their nice big cooler. (There were drinks in a SECOND cooler)

Then there were all the candles. The centerpieces were to be lots of seashell candles nested in sand in large bowls. Plus all the tealight candles for the votives on the tables. You can’t leave a bunch of candles sitting in a car for days in Florida in August. You can, but they’ll probably melt some, so then you will have a bride freaking out, and I had already freaked out, and there’s a limit to how many people can be freaking out at one time.

Then there was the wedding dress. And the maid of honor dress, and the mother of the bride dress. To be on the safe side, they all came up, too.
(Really. YOU JUST HAVE TO SHOW UP.)

So, there we were. Everyone was quiet, we were finally relaxing.

“Hey” my sister calls over to me.

“What? I can’t hear you. Where are you?”

“Over here!”

“Over where? Behind the big stack of blue bins, or the big stack of green bins?”

“No, behind the stack of pink bins.”

“Oh, okay. What?”

“Magic Kingdom is open until midnight tonite. Let’s go!”

Hmm. It was tempting. But I was tired. But, Magic is my favorite. But had I gotten over the “sucking the air out of the room” remark, or did the little flame of resentment burn on? But we weren’t all going to Magic Kingdom until the last day, 2 days later. That was because there was something extra special planned for the boys that morning, at MK.

Plus, little sister was getting married. She was staying in Chicago with the new hubby and we would continue to live in different cities. It would be just the two of us, rambling around the park. This was a tradition between us that had gone on for several trips. Our parents would give it up and leave a park for the day-but we would stay until the park closed late. And once the extra hours started, we would stay REALLY late. And the boys would be ready to go to bed soon, so I could put them down and not have to worry.

Well, I DID tell her to tell me if I was acting too stressed out. (I’m not convinced I really meant it though. If you ask your sister “Does this make me look fat?” you don’t ever truly want her to say yes.)
Plus, I could always bring it up at holidays and special occasions. And parking lots.

“Ok-let’s go to Magic Kingdom!”

 

[amypoppins]

So, little sister and I went to the Magic Kingdom for a few hours. The Magic Kingdom late at night is my favorite spot of any of the parks. If I could transport myself to one-at the time and place of my choosing-that would always be it.

Everything becomes softer at night. On Main Street the lamps glow with an almost friendly light. The music is playing and the brighter light spills out from the stores onto the sidewalks and pavement, the crowds carrying it out with them.

The smell of asphalt baking under the sun is replaced with the smells of cotton candy and popcorn.

I always smile when I hear Jiminy Cricket’s voice over the loud speakers, telling me things I need to know.

The bell and whistle from the train is louder, it carries more clearly across the night sky.

Tomorrowland shoots off its neon lights like rockets into the dark sky and welcomes you with a different spirit than the other lands.

Fantasyland glows. There be pixie dust in them thar hills.

In Adventureland, Splash Mountain rises up into the night sky and the rumble from the rollers under the log boats washes over you. And when you’re riding it, and you come out and circle around the top of the mountain, you look out across the whole of Magic Kingdom and all its twinkling lights—and it’s like a horizontal Christmas tree laid out before you.

The Haunted Mansion is better. It revels in the night air. What merely seems campy under the bright Florida sun takes a slightly more ominous turn. Perhaps something IS waiting back behind those tombstones.

But my absolute favorite place in all of Walt Disney World, in all of the Magic Kingdom, is the walkway in Frontierland along the water. Late at night there’s usually no one else walking on it. The lamps beckon you along, the water laps beside you, and the wood creaks softly under my feet. I like to think it’s saying “Hey! You’re back! We missed you!”.

One trip when my sister was around 7 or 8, we had stayed late and were walking along there and she just stopped and said she was too tired and couldn’t keep going. She was wearing new shorts and they had chaffed her (resist the urge to wear new and unbroken in shoes and clothes, people-resist!) and she got a bit teary.

So we stopped, and she climbed onto my back, and I carried her along that walkway and out of Frontierland. So always when I walk along there, I feel ever so slightly the weight of that little girl resting on my back, a sense memory to carry with me always.

We also started a tradition of stopping at Casey’s when the park closed to enjoy a cold drink and hot fries and watch the masses go by. The strollers, the balloons, the glowing and the depleted, we could sit tucked away and take in the last bit of dust as it sprinkled from the sky.

I share Walt Disney World with my sons now, to be sure. But when I think of the quiet magic of the Magic Kingdom late at night, I think of my sister.

Despite her having told me that I was sucking all the air out of the room.

 

[amypoppins]

Ladies and Gentlemen:

Welcome to Disney’s Animal Kingdom. We’d like to review a few of the safety guidelines before you enter the park.

There will be no character greets of any kind. We’ve covered this, but it’s even worse here because the characters are dressed differently, and there’s a whole bunch of animals roaming around which mucks things up further. Just cross the street, or village path, or the boneyard, or the rapids—just get over.

This park is large. This park is very large. This park eats The Studios for lunch. Plan accordingly.

We hope you like animals. We hope you enjoy looking at, admiring, and learning about animals. We hope you don’t think the zoo in your hometown is better, so it makes the 1300 mile trek seem less worthwhile.

We hope you like birds. We got birds.

We hope you aren’t a picky eater and enjoy trying new and interesting foods. At the very least we hope you consult the map early so you know where the places are that might serve food to your particular party’s liking. You wouldn’t want to get stuck on the other side of the park. Because it’s very large, you see.

NO RUBBER SNAKES OR INSECTS WILL PURCHASED.

Thank you, and please enjoy your stay.