We leave Wednesday and I'm stressing about the cost!

I looked into that but many of our meals are in a blackout period for TIW.
You leave tomorrow. What days are blacked out for TiW?

http://tablesinwonderland.com/
General Block-out Dates:

  • All Tables in Wonderland locations are blocked-out for Mother’s Day, Easter Sunday, Independence Day, Thanksgiving Day, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day. Please note that some locations are subject to additional block-out dates.
 
You leave tomorrow. What days are blacked out for TiW?

http://tablesinwonderland.com/
General Block-out Dates:

  • All Tables in Wonderland locations are blocked-out for Mother’s Day, Easter Sunday, Independence Day, Thanksgiving Day, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day. Please note that some locations are subject to additional block-out dates.

Additional Block-out dates: These select locations are subject to the following additional block-out dates, 1900 Park Fare, Chef Mickey’s, ‘Ohana (Dinner Only), Cinderella’s Royal Table, Les Chefs de France, Akershus Royal Banquet Hall, and Le Cellier Steakhouse: March 6-27, 2016; May 29- June 18, 2016; November 13-27, 2016; December 19-25, 2016


That's almost half our meals blocked out!
 

Wednesday we are leaving for an 11 day trip down. It will be me, DD, a close friend, and her 2 DDs. I think it will be a great trip, except our financial strategies are very different.

When I travel, I tend to try and stick with smart financial decisions. We may do 1 or 2 character meals, mixed with quick service and meals at our condo. We are not big eaters and try to stick with at least a semi healthy diet while on vacation. Eating too much junk really makes me feel awful. I tend to not buy many souvenirs, which I think are overpriced and won't be remembered. I do my best not to shop on vacation (unless I'm in a place with awesome outlets, like Gatlinburg). I earn a lot of money but I have a lot to pay for and I can't just spend freely.

My friend is one of the best people I know. She is a wonderful person and her daughters are the most well behaved children I have ever met. She is very much a free spender. She doesn't make much and to overcompensate she pretty much buys whatever she feel like until her money is gone and then is broke until payday. This is her first trip to disney and so far we have 8 character meals planned. I added it up with tip and that's roughly $800 I'll be spending just for DD and I on 8 meals. I'm trying to go with the flow because I don't want to bring down her first big vacatiom, but I really don't want to spend that much on food. I usually budget $1000 for 3 of us for our whole trip. I'll be spending almost that much on just 8 of the meals! Additionally, I know she is going to buy her girls a bunch of souvenirs. She just can't tell them no. I've been trying to prepare DD, explaining to her that we don't need a bunch of disney stuff because we go so often, and we might not get as many toys as the others do. But she's 4 and I'm worried she will get her feelings hurt if I don't let her get the same amount as the other kids.

Any advice on keeping my costs down without bringing my friend's trip down? We are already saving by staying off site in a condo and we are driving my car, we got their tickets off parksavers (DD and I are AP holders). I joined the Landrys club and will purchase a landrys gift card from kroger for the fuel points. I might try and get my hands on some Sam's club discounted disney gift cards to pay for food. It only saves 5% but it's something.

You've already agreed to the meals, so it's too late to back out of that now without some social consequences. It's a bit last-minute (days before the trip) to make those changes, as character dining can be a big part of people's trips (it was for ours when my son was younger).

I suggest letting your friend know that you're not crazy about shopping while on vacation, and schedule together a few times in the trip when she can shop with her girls, and you do a separate activity with your daughter. (That will give you some relaxing down time with her, anyway.) If you're worried about her being envious of all of their loot, you might pick up a few items cheaply pre-Disney, then take them out as surprises when the other girls are showing off their stuff.
 
Additional Block-out dates: These select locations are subject to the following additional block-out dates, 1900 Park Fare, Chef Mickey’s, ‘Ohana (Dinner Only), Cinderella’s Royal Table, Les Chefs de France, Akershus Royal Banquet Hall, and Le Cellier Steakhouse: March 6-27, 2016; May 29- June 18, 2016; November 13-27, 2016; December 19-25, 2016


That's almost half our meals blocked out!
Dang! I missed that!

How about your AP discount? It's only 10% but you can ask if it applies to your meals.
 
If I was your friend I wouldn't be upset that you didn't want to do everything we wanted to do. But I'd be hacked off that you went along and made plans, then decided to change it all up at the last minute.

Why did you make the plans if you had misgivings?
 
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We met up with my sis and her family at Disneyland last year. That was their first family vacation ever so they went all out... we would stay together for part of the day but then split up for meals. We travel often so our kids know that we don't buy a lot of stuff, our girls get a budget for souvenirs and a day they are allowed to spend that money. I don't like carrying junk while we are trying to have fun.
 
Yes resolve this before you go and just tell your friend the situation. Can you just not participate in some of those character meals and go you own way for a bit? We too are only planning a few ts meals this time around as we are not on dining plan and I'm fine with that. There are some really good counter service places to eat at and will save you some money. I too don't like to eat heavily while in Disney and prefer lighter meals most of the time.
 
Your friend (or you) made ADRs for 5 people and getting those same ADRs for 3 people may not be possible. If you and your daughter decide not to go, you could be be charged $20 for each meal because of a no-show, unless your friend cancels the ADR completely. (Although in some cases, the restaurant will waive the no-show if the majority of the party shows up.)

If they were booked for 5 and at least one person shows up and eats there is no penalty. The penalty is only if nobody from the reservation shows up in which case a $10 per person fee is charged to the card on file at the time of the reservation.

OP...that is a lot of character meals (and honestly a lot of money for cruddy buffet food). How many days is this trip? Just wondering how many TS per day you were booked for.
 
The trip is 11 days. We only have one day where we have 2 TS meals, an early chef mickey breakfast and anot early CP dinner.

I know it's a lot of money and mediocre food, but when we were planning I didn't want to burst her bubble. I think a couple meals will show her what a waste so many will be.
 
Why are you afraid to do what you want on a very expensive trip? You have a right to do what you like and are comfortable with. Please have fun. Friends will be ok.
 
Why are you afraid to do what you want on a very expensive trip? You have a right to do what you like and are comfortable with. Please have fun. Friends will be ok.


Peehaps because they made plans to do these things a long time ago and waited until the last minute to change them.
 
Hi Op. I agree that you should have put a stop to this from the beginning, but you didn't. Your current plan seems to be to wait and hope that she realizes herself that so many character meals aren't a good idea. I wouldn't count on that happening. You already said she and her daughters were bigger eaters so they may love them!

At this point, I would suggest having a heart to heart that finances aren't quite what you were hoping prior to the trip and that you are going to need to cut some costs. Explain that you will need to opt out of several of the more expensive meals. And, that you are going to put a hard limit on souvenirs. I predict she will be upset with you changing the plans and honestly, I don't blame her. But by putting the blame on yourself and reassuring her how much you are looking forward to this trip, you might make it okay.

For the record, I'm with you. On our 11 day trip, we had 4 ADRs at table service meals with no buffets since we also share a lot of meals. But, I know others who build their trips around the food and love it that way!
 
Why not back out of some of the character meals? Have a frank talk with her-- that the plans as they are are busting your budget. So she can have her character meal, you have counter service, and you can meet up afterwards? The added perk is a little mom-daughter time on the vacation for both families, time spent alone apart from your good friends. Your daughter can spend that time doing the things SHE wants to do, without worrying that the other family may not want to re-ride the teacups or whatever. And too much togetherness, even with people you love, can be tiring.

So she has her dream trip, you have yours, and you still have lots of time as a big group.

This was going to be my exact suggestion. If you are close enough to go to Disney for that long, I think she will be very understanding of you stating what is best for you and your daughter. I would just point out when you say the things quoted in the above post, make sure you don't come off as judgmental. Don't even offer a compromise. Just say "Unfortunately, friend, 8 character meals is not where I'm comfortable spending the bulk of our money. I would love to still share experiences at 1. favorite character meal and 2. other character meal. For the other meals, I will be making alternate arrangements for me and DD. We would love for you to join us at a cheaper meal, but understand if more expensive meals are your priority on your family vacation."
 
Gee, that's a lot of character meals and a lot of money & time spent on them!

But the time to speak up about those plans was when they were first mentioned. At this point, you're only a few days away from going. Your friend (or you) made ADRs for 5 people and getting those same ADRs for 3 people may not be possible. If you and your daughter decide not to go, you could be be charged $20 for each meal because of a no-show, unless your friend cancels the ADR completely. (Although in some cases, the restaurant will waive the no-show if the majority of the party shows up.)

I would be inclined to show the friend what her share of the meals will cost. Maybe seeing it on paper will convince her that it's too much money to be spent on just food and character interaction. If she realizes how expensive it will be, then the two of you can choose which ADRs to cancel. But if she still wants to spend that much on dining, you may have to just suck it up and spend just for the sake of keeping the peace.

I believe this is incorrect. I have never heard of them charging a partial no-show.

Additionally, I wouldn't even bring up the cost to my friend. She is free to spend her money however she pleases and me pointing out costs to her will look judgmental.
 
Why not back out of some of the character meals? Have a frank talk with her-- that the plans as they are are busting your budget. So she can have her character meal, you have counter service, and you can meet up afterwards? The added perk is a little mom-daughter time on the vacation for both families, time spent alone apart from your good friends. Your daughter can spend that time doing the things SHE wants to do, without worrying that the other family may not want to re-ride the teacups or whatever. And too much togetherness, even with people you love, can be tiring.

So she has her dream trip, you have yours, and you still have lots of time as a big group.
Agreed!! We go w/family & friends often. We plan to eat separately most times simply because we eat out - a lot & we wouldn't dream of expecting others to want to eat the same foods or spend what we have on food. Going forward though, we will be eating out less... We've been to Disney the past 6 yrs, so we're spending our time & funds very differently than we have in the past.

All in all, we still have a great time with our family & friends regardless of our eating habits.
 
The trip is 11 days. We only have one day where we have 2 TS meals, an early chef mickey breakfast and anot early CP dinner.

I know it's a lot of money and mediocre food, but when we were planning I didn't want to burst her bubble. I think a couple meals will show her what a waste so many will be.

She might be embarrassed that she overplayed or worry that you are now excited and feel the need to save face by eating all the meals. You just need to talk to your friend. That's all it is, a chat with your very, very close friend that you are going on a very long trip with.

Your friend might very well also be worrying about your feelings. You will very likely be giving her permission to change her mind when she gets there by not being signed on to join her for those meals.

For the record, I would be more offended that my friend didn't think highly enough of me to trust me to be understanding of her legitimate financial concerns than I would about friend saying "I can't comfortably afford as many meals as I was hoping. I still plan to join you for x,y,z. We will be making alternate arrangements for less expensive meals for the other meals if you want to join us." She'll probably say "Oh that's fine, because I was a little worried I made to many ADRs and didn't want to hurt your feelings." or "I'm sorry you won't be joining us for Chef Mickey's, but I will be excited to spend the day with you in the park."

What is there for her to be mad or hurt about?
 
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The character meals are primarily buffets, and it is quite possible that after a few in a row, she will be sorta sick of them. I would ask her to reflect on the meal, was it all that she had hoped/expected? Be honest, say you want to sit the next one out and get her response. If you reserved for five and 3 arrive, her reservation will be honored....People get sick all the time!...Last year there was a 95 degree day that made me feel awful, I certainly had no stomach for eating, and we delayed our ressie time: completely understood by Disney. Just tell her of your concerns!...If she is a good enough friend to vacation with, she will allow you to do what you feel you need to, without any guilt.
 
Whatever you decide, have fun on your trip and if you're there, you may as well eat up! It's Disney day!!!!!
 















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