We just found out our daughter is allergic to cats, and of course, we have one. Help!

[C.Ann]

When DD first started dating her DH, he was allergic to cats.. Not to the point of not being able to breathe, but pretty bad.. Well - we had a cat - and it just so happens that her DH took a real shine to him.. So, he would play with him, pet him, and then wash his hands thoroughly.. This went on for two years - one day he forgot - and had no reaction at all..

Tried it a few more times - still nothing.. (By the way, her DH was in his mid 20's at the time..)

When they married, they got a cat (long haired) and the following year a second long haired cat.. He's never had a problem with them at all..

In his case, I think he just needed the slow exposure over the course of time.. (When he was younger and his mom found out he was allergic, she really went overboard in keeping him away from cats.. You would have thought he was being exposed to the bubonic plague or something - LOL..)

So - if you can do your best to eliminate everything else, I think she'll be fine.. Over the course of time she may just out grow it..

Good luck!

 

[chyam]

I have asthma and have 8 cats, things that help me control the problem...I don't have carpeting in any rooms of my house, laminate and tile. I also give my cats a bath, once a month, that helps control the dander problem and I don't let them sleep with me, I do love them and allow them lots of lap time, it's just that when they sleep with me they like to be right up by my head! I have never believed in giving up an animal that has been in the home for years, I guess I would if it were life threatening but it seems like with you DD it is just a mild allergy.

 

[LuLuO]

I have tons of allergies, including a moderate allergy to dogs and cats. We have had cats and dogs all my life. My 14 year old kitty is sleeping on my bed at the moment. We also have a dog. I was also a dog and cat groomer for 6 years. I took allergy meds while I worked there but there were still some cats and dog that I couldn't groom. However, I seem to do fine with my own animals and only rarely have a reaction. When I do have a reaction it can be hives, rash, itchy, watery eyes. Nothing too severe.

If one of my kids was allergic like me and only had to take medication once in a while, then I'd keep the cat. If they had a severe allergy and would have to undergo shots/daily meds, ect., just to keep the cat then I would rehome.

 

[Agri]

When DD first started dating her DH, he was allergic to cats.. Not to the point of not being able to breathe, but pretty bad.. Well - we had a cat - and it just so happens that her DH took a real shine to him.. So, he would play with him, pet him, and then wash his hands thoroughly.. This went on for two years - one day he forgot - and had no reaction at all..

Tried it a few more times - still nothing.. (By the way, her DH was in his mid 20's at the time..)

When they married, they got a cat (long haired) and the following year a second long haired cat.. He's never had a problem with them at all..

In his case, I think he just needed the slow exposure over the course of time.. (When he was younger and his mom found out he was allergic, she really went overboard in keeping him away from cats.. You would have thought he was being exposed to the bubonic plague or something - LOL..)

So - if you can do your best to eliminate everything else, I think she'll be fine.. Over the course of time she may just out grow it..

Good luck!

One of my best friends from high school had a very similar experience. He has asthma and exposure to the cats used to trigger it, but he spent more time with his then-gf/now wife's cats (and mine, when it was clear they would get married) to increase his tolerance and exposure and he is now fine with cats. He doesn't even sneeze when he comes to the house anymore!

You're not a horrible parent to not immediately give up the cat. The cat is important to your daughter and I am sure she would want to try some alternatives before giving up her pet. If being around the cat really makes her feel bad, she might end up being more willing to give up the cat after awhile if she has more control over the situation.

 

[disney1990]

I'm sorry but yes, you would be the worst parents in the world if you keep the cat.

No, you would not be the worse parent in the world. It really depends on how allergic your child is and how you handle the situation.

Many years ago, when our daughter was young, her best friend was allergic to cats. When she first starting come over to our house, she had all the typical allergic reactions -- sneezing, eyes swelling, etc. Well, the months and years went by and she continued to come over to visit and eventually even spent weekends at our house -- with the cat. She eventually built up a tolerance to the cat (as long as she wasn't petting or holding her).

 

[CathrynRose]

I'm sorry but yes, you would be the worst parents in the world if you keep the cat.

Yikes!

No way. I think getting rid of the cat, immediately (or any animal, for that matter) is the worst parent, in the world.

Without trying every other possible thing you can try - and it's a LAST resort, you're not showing your children what a commitment and responsibility it is, being a pet owner.

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

My son also has multiple airborne allergies. I've heard allergies described as a bucket of water with a slow leak. Every exposure to allergies is like a drop in the bucket. If it's dropping faster than it's leaking, it will overflow and you'll see symptoms. She could have a bucket that's really full from dust mites, for example, and the drops from the cat would be the final straw. But reducing the flow of dust allergies might give her more space to tolerate the cat. Similarly medication is like speeding up the leak -- it gives you some breathing room.

So, if I were you and I really wanted to keep my cat, I'd take all the dust mite precautions I reasonably could (encase her mattress and pillow, no carpet or curtains or stuffed animals in her room, a hepa filter, maybe a dehumdifier), and some reasonable cat precautions (cat never goes in her room, wash hands after she pets cat etc . . . ) and maybe try some medication (we have good luck with Singulair), and then evaluate. You might find that she does OK, or you might find that it's not enough and she's still miserable.

Note: if she's having asthma attacks and being hospitalized or something similar than I'd say kid outweighs cat, get rid of it, but I'm assuming the fact that you're even asking means you're not calling 911 for her on a regular basis.

 

[shortbun]

I forgot to say that we went with all wood floors or tile/slate and we heavily vacuum the furniture once or twice a week. I said we allergy wrapped and taped the beds, we do the pillows too. all bedding is changed and washed in hot with allergen free soap once a week.

 

[jenrose66]

Yikes!

No way. I think getting rid of the cat, immediately (or any animal, for that matter) is the worst parent, in the world.

Without trying every other possible thing you can try - and it's a LAST resort, you're not showing your children what a commitment and responsibility it is, being a pet owner.

I'm sorry but I disagree. Children are more important than pets. Finding a loving home or a no kill shelter is humane to the pet and the child. Kids don't choose where they live they count on their parents to look out for their best interests.

Especially if a parent doesn't have allergies themselves then you have no idea what even a "mild" allergy feels like. Just cause your throat doesn't close it doesn't mean that the allergy isn't an assault on your body. Plus the allergy can be exasperated by something that for other people would just be a simple cold. Instead of a cold that will run it's course within a couple weeks you'll have a months long cough and chronic wheezing, but hey it's ok cause you're treating the allergy with shots and meds so the cat has nothing to do with the sickness

Once someone is an adult and they choose to keep an animal even if they have allergies that is their choice but to me, I feel it's abusive to keep an animal in the home when you have child with an allergy.

 

[CathrynRose]

I'm sorry but I disagree. Children are more important than pets. Finding a loving home or a no kill shelter is humane to the pet and the child. Kids don't choose where they live they count on their parents to look out for their best interests.

Especially if a parent doesn't have allergies themselves then you have no idea what even a "mild" allergy feels like. Just cause your throat doesn't close it doesn't mean that the allergy isn't an assault on your body. Plus the allergy can be exasperated by something that for other people would just be a simple cold. Instead of a cold that will run it's course within a couple weeks you'll have a months long cough and chronic wheezing, but hey it's ok cause you're treating the allergy with shots and meds so the cat has nothing to do with the sickness

Once someone is an adult and they choose to keep an animal even if they have allergies that is their choice but to me, I feel it's abusive to keep an animal in the home when you have child with an allergy.

Save the eyerolls. I live with allergies - to my dogs!! - every single day.

I'm aware of what allergies can do. I'm also aware of the impression you can make on your kids, by example.

 

[emer95]

I'm sorry but yes, you would be the worst parents in the world if you keep the cat. I am deathly allergic to cats my parents found out when i was 3 or 4. Anyway we had a beloved family cat, my mom tried shots, I was on steriods after 9 months they made the hard decision to get rid of the cat. Even if you could control your daughters allergies on medication why would you want her on heavier doses of steriods or meds that can weaken her lungs and shorten her life just cause she loves the cat. It's a hard thing to do but life goes on.

I'll also go on to say that my parents divorced. My younger brother is also allergic to cats. Well the woman my dad left my mom for was a cat lover also and the first thing they bought when they moved in together was a cat. It was terrible, if I went to see my dad I'd always be terribly ill as would my brother. Once their first cat died after 13 years they went and got not one but 2 more cats. I always felt like their animals were more important to them than my dads own kids.

My goodness!

Please re-read my post. My daughter is HIGHLY allergic to dust. That was #1 on her list. We are taking her for shots for that reason, as well as the other things (rageweed, pollen, grass, trees, AND dogs and cats). She'd be going for shots if we had a cat or not.

Here are my daughter's symptoms: she clears her throat a lot, and itches her nose all of the time. She never has red or itchy eyes, trouble breathing, hives, or any of the classic anaphylactic symptoms.

Obviously you have more severe allergies, and you had a tough childhood. I'm sorry about that. But I owe it to my daughter to at least try some of the things the other very thoughtful posters have suggested before I break my child's heart and get rid of the pet that we all love so dearly.

FYI, I myself suffer from allergies and carry an Epi pen. So as for your assumption that I'm an uncaring parent who has no idea what my daughter is going through, you're quite wrong on both counts.

Thanks to everyone else for your helpful and supportive responses!

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I have a significant dog, cat, and grass allergy. I consulted with my allergist who has a medical degree and license to practice. I 100% disagree with your 100% blanket statement. If my licensed amd degrees professional is not requiring us to give up our pets for my or dd's benefit, that carries much more weight than your upbringing.

It does not make me the worst parent and your willingness to give up pets so easily for your and/or your children doesn't make you person/parent of the year either.


While your allergy and symptoms may have been much more serious and your parents less compassionate towards that, doesn't mean that all parents are like that. Taking your circumstances and painted everyone with that broad brush is not right. Absolutes rarely exist.

I'm sorry but I disagree. Children are more important than pets. Finding a loving home or a no kill shelter is humane to the pet and the child. Kids don't choose where they live they count on their parents to look out for their best interests.

Especially if a parent doesn't have allergies themselves then you have no idea what even a "mild" allergy feels like. Just cause your throat doesn't close it doesn't mean that the allergy isn't an assault on your body. Plus the allergy can be exasperated by something that for other people would just be a simple cold. Instead of a cold that will run it's course within a couple weeks you'll have a months long cough and chronic wheezing, but hey it's ok cause you're treating the allergy with shots and meds so the cat has nothing to do with the sickness

Once someone is an adult and they choose to keep an animal even if they have allergies that is their choice but to me, I feel it's abusive to keep an animal in the home when you have child with an allergy.

 

[jenrose66]

My goodness!

Please re-read my post. My daughter is HIGHLY allergic to dust. That was #1 on her list. We are taking her for shots for that reason, as well as the other things (rageweed, pollen, grass, trees, AND dogs and cats). She'd be going for shots if we had a cat or not.

Here are my daughter's symptoms: she clears her throat a lot, and itches her nose all of the time. She never has red or itchy eyes, trouble breathing, hives, or any of the classic anaphylactic symptoms.

Obviously you have more severe allergies, and you had a tough childhood. I'm sorry about that. But I owe it to my daughter to at least try some of the things the other very thoughtful posters have suggested before I break my child's heart and get rid of the pet that we all love so dearly.

FYI, I myself suffer from allergies and carry an Epi pen. So as for your assumption that I'm an uncaring parent who has no idea what my daughter is going through, you're quite wrong on both counts.

Thanks to everyone else for your helpful and supportive responses!

You asked for opinions...most people told you what you wanted to hear, I'm sorry I did not but it doesn't make what I said any less true. I've consulted with two different allergists on the issues of animals and both have said it's better to get rid of the offending allergen (i.e. the pets) rather than treat because it's something that doesn't have to be in the environment. Obviously you feel that there is something to getting rid of your cat or else you wouldn't have asked if it was something you should do.

 

[Melmac]

When I was a kid, I was in the same situation as your daughter - allergy tested at 6, found cats to be an allergy and asthma trigger. My mom was (and still is!) a neat freak and so the house was cleaned 3x a week anyway - dust and vacuum at the very least and so we never thought that the cat was a problem.

I found to help me: the cat was not allowed in my room (door stayed closed) and I still had to vacuum/dust 3x week. My parents also used this as an excuse to get rid of their carpet and refinish the hardwoods underneath. That made a huge difference as the cat hair could be swiffered everyday. Also, when I played with cat, I would just make sure to not touch my face and I would wash my hands and face really well afterwards. I didn't have any trouble in my own home (and the cat lived to be 20) but I still get bad symptoms in other people's homes that have cats. I think it helped that she was a short-hair siamese with an attitude problem and didn't hang around people much

 

[j's m]

You asked for opinions...most people told you what you wanted to hear, I'm sorry I did not but it doesn't make what I said any less true. I've consulted with two different allergists on the issues of animals and both have said it's better to get rid of the offending allergen (i.e. the pets) rather than treat because it's something that doesn't have to be in the environment. Obviously you feel that there is something to getting rid of your cat or else you wouldn't have asked if it was something you should do.

I agree with all 3 of your posts. The OP wouldn't have asked for ideas if she wasn't completely sure.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

You asked for opinions...most people told you what you wanted to hear, I'm sorry I did not but it doesn't make what I said any less true. I've consulted with two different allergists on the issues of animals and both have said it's better to get rid of the offending allergen (i.e. the pets) rather than treat because it's something that doesn't have to be in the environment. Obviously you feel that there is something to getting rid of your cat or else you wouldn't have asked if it was something you should do.

I doubt any allergist would label her the worst parent in the world. It seems you projecting your opinions of your parents onto the OP.

I don't think she was looking for a literal response to that particular question.

 

[emer95]

I doubt any allergist would label her the worst parent in the world. It seems you projecting your opinions of your parents onto the OP.

I don't think she was looking for a literal response to that particular question.

Thanks, Lisa.

 

[malibuconlee]

I have trouble breathing with the cat allergy I developed as an adult. For me I would have to get rid of the cat and change out the carpeting and pad. Some people aren't as severe as I have tho.

Discuss with the doctor tho. If it were my daughter and we didn't have to pump a bunch of allergy meds into her if we got rid of the cat I would find the cat a new home.

 

[mjkacmom]

I'm sorry but I disagree. Children are more important than pets. Finding a loving home or a no kill shelter is humane to the pet and the child. Kids don't choose where they live they count on their parents to look out for their best interests.

Especially if a parent doesn't have allergies themselves then you have no idea what even a "mild" allergy feels like. Just cause your throat doesn't close it doesn't mean that the allergy isn't an assault on your body. Plus the allergy can be exasperated by something that for other people would just be a simple cold. Instead of a cold that will run it's course within a couple weeks you'll have a months long cough and chronic wheezing, but hey it's ok cause you're treating the allergy with shots and meds so the cat has nothing to do with the sickness

Once someone is an adult and they choose to keep an animal even if they have allergies that is their choice but to me, I feel it's abusive to keep an animal in the home when you have child with an allergy.

I am extremely allergic to cats (and rats, I discovered, when we got them as pets - of course we kept them), as is one of my children, which is why we don't have them. My kids have the usual seasonal allergies, mild. I certainly wouldn't crush my child and give up a family pet for a mild allergy. I got shots for mine (back in the stone age), and live with allergies on a daily basis - it's really no big deal (we have tissues in every room of the house). Now, if one of my kids with RAD was allergic to a pet, I might change my tune. Studies are now showing that having pets actually can decrease allergies:
http://www.webmd.com/allergies/news/20070101/pets-may-protect-children-allergies

 

[torinsmom]

I know you would not be asking opinions if your child was severely allergic. Sounds like the mild kind of allergy that many people have to pollen or dust. I have the same symptoms and it isn't that big a deal when I compare it to living without my sweet cats.

I agree with the person that said you might consider replacing carpet with hardwood or laminate, especially since your daughter is highly allergic to dust as well. I noticed a big difference in my allergies when I got my carpet replaced with laminate. I did it for the whole house, except for the kitchen and bathroom, which are vinyl. It is amazing how much dust and dander can stay in the carpet, even after vacuuming.

I would also switch to a very high rated air filter, if you don't already use them. This can help reduce the allergens as well.

Chances are, even if you got rid of the cats, your daughter would still have the same symptoms, especially considering that dust is the main allergen. I just found out I was allergic to cats last year after getting 2 new ones(we have 4). I had had cats all my life and never knew I was allergic. My allergist said that exposure to an allergen can reduce your body's reaction as well, and that since different cats have different dander, the new cats probably set my allergies off. I figure I'll get used to them too.

I would also give your daughter some input into the decision, since she is the one who has to deal with the symptoms. I bet she would rather take an everyday antihistamine like claritin than get rid of her cat.