wanna read something funny? chucknorrisfacts.com

[harleyquinn]

Anyone else heard about this? All my friends think it's like the funniest thing.

Check it out! Hope you get a kick (just don't get tired of that one) out of it!

 

[Tiziminchac]

That was pretty funny. I liked these...

"Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice."

"Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right leg."

"When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down."

"Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head."

"There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist."

 

[nataliz]

My favorite is "There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live."

 

[harleyquinn]

I love the round house kick ones.

If you like the top ten be sure to read some of the "additional chuck norris facts" Some of the real gems are in there.

 

[harleyquinn]

If tapped, a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick could power the country of Australia for 44 minutes.

Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.



These are great too.
Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.

Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego.

When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer. You will score over 8000.

Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.

 

[Charade]

 

[Stacerita]

I needed to laugh this morning.

"When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris."

 

[pixiemomma]

Saw this a few months ago. Hilarious.

 

[LiteBrite]

I loved:
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer

 

[BandGeek911]

Those are great


Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding

Chuck Norris CAN lick his elbow.

Chuck Norris does not love Raymond

The only reason the color pink still exists is because Chuck Norris is color blind.

See spot. See spot run. See spot get round house kicked in the face by Chuck Norris.

 

[beckmrk04]

Ooooh, I needed a good laugh. This was awesome.

 

[BandGeek911]

When Chuck Norris crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.


Another good one

The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.

CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot *** kicking in real-time.

Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11.... a suicide.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.

Sorry, I couldn't help myself