Waiting to start kindergarten?

Princess Dot

<font color=green>Cried at the end of "Brother Bea
Joined
Nov 12, 1999
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496
What do you think about waiting until a child is 6 to start kindergarten? I have heard all different ideas on this, especially for boys that it gives them an advantage, an extra year to "mature", etc.

This concerns a friend's son who will be turning 5 about one month after school would start. They are leaning toward holding him back. Having no boys of my own, I'm not sure if there is a bigger advantage to hold boys back over girls. Mine all started k "on time" according to our district's policy (5 by Dec 1st of that year) and never had any trouble. I guess I just fail to see how an extra year of pre school can provide an advantage over just starting in kindergarten.

Any experiences?
 
I'm sure that every child is different, but starting kindergarten a year late was wonderful for my younger brother. He is one of the top students in his class and I think it is primarily because of his maturity level. He's now a sophomore in HS and has excelled academically as well as in sports. It has helped that he was one of the bigger kids in his class instead of one of the smallest. My parents have always been glad they held him out a year. (He didn't go to preschool at all, just spent an extra year at home!)
 
My nieces should have been held back and eventually they were. They were not mature enough for kindergarten, although their mom insisted they were. :rolleyes: They had to take it again and did so much better the second time.

I really think it depends on the kid. Is he ready for kindergarten?
 
Because of our cut off time, my daughter will be held back, and will be one of the older ones in her class. I on the other hand was put in earlier based on my parent's choice. I think it depends on each individual child and their development. If the child is held back that may be good if they are slower in learning things. That way, the parents can take their child to a play group to have them associate with other kids and to learn. They can also have more time in teaching their child things that will be taught in school.
 

Thats good to hear! I guess I may have a bit of a bias, as there is one boy in my dd's class who always gets top grades, always "best" at everything. Then I come to find out that he is a whole year older than her, almost to the date. He is a very bright kid and I'm sure he would have done well even if he had started the year before, IMHo. Maybe in HS it does not make such a big difference, but in1st or 2nd grade, I got tired of hearing from my dd how much better she thought this boy was doing than she was. I alway told her that it was because he was 7 when she was 6, etc. My dd is very competitive and also a top student. I know she would have been bored out of her skull to stay at home for another year, she was so excited to attend "big girl" school!

I realize every child is different and you have to make the decisions that you think are best for your own child. The only reason I asked this question here is because I really do not want to get into it with my friend when I think she has her mind made up to hold him back. But I did want to hear from others about their experiences.
 
I had all plans on holding my daughter back from kindergarten since she is a Nov baby and will only be 4 when she starts kindergarten....but then he preschool teacher pulled me aside in Dec telling me how mature my daughter was and how she is already doing kindergarten work and when I mentioned holding her back the teacher said it would be a bad thing for her because she would be bored to death in kindergarten if I did...in school the kids were drawing shapes and my daughter did the normal shapes and then did trapazoids and parrallegrams and could name what she was drawing! She is also starting to read beginning reader books....so she is going in Sept.....right now she is in preschool 3 days a week and pre-k in the public school one day a week. Each kid is different though, you have to go by where your own child is at, some benefit from being held back and some dont.
 
IMO, unless there are extenuating circumstances, it generally evens out in a few years. I think many people fail to take into consideration the age their kids will be before they graduate from high school when they make this choice.

Many states don't let the kids start unless they are 5 by the start of the school year - so in your friend's case it probably won't make a whole lot of difference. I just don't like it when people hold back kids who will turn 19 before graduation without at least taking that into consideration.:confused: Around here it's not uncommon to keep boys back that have even spring birthdays back.
 
We did this with our middle child (DS). His birthday is in late July and I couldn't really see him sitting still and meeting the demands of today's K class. It was a tough decision to make, we went back and forth on it. DH felt that we should send DS, but in my gut I knew DS wasn't ready. I talked to our pediatrician about it, older DS's former K teacher, friends that worked at the school. They basically all agreed that I should go with my gut instinct.

We held DS back one year and allowed him another year of preschool. It was the best decision we ever made. We wanted DS to fit in socially and be mature enough to follow the class rules and expectations, NOT so that he'd be "ahead" of the class academically the following year. He is now in 2nd grade and is doing great. If we had to do it again, we would make the same decision.


Hope this helps.:sunny:
 
Hey girl! Where have you been? :wave2:
 
This is a topic near and dear to my heart. I am a teacher of our district's Young 5s program. It is state funded and offered at NO cost. It runs as an alternative K and the expectation of the district is that the children will attend K the following year. It runs 5 days a week, 3 hours a day on the regular K-12 calendar.

My classes consist primarily of boys who have late summer/fall birthdays, since our cut off date is Dec. 1. The parents opt to put them in our program for social as well as cognitve issues. I do get quite a few children who start the K program and the teacher recommends another year to grow and informs the parents about Young 5s.

Many districts in our state (as ours has) have switched to a LITERACY based K curriculum. Children are expected to already know the alphabet when they enter K. This past week, the Kindergarten teachers told me that they are doing "dictation" already. The teacher reads a 12 word sentence and the students have to write each word in a numbered box. In addition, they are expected to do a shared pen activity, be independant in journal activities and be able to be fluent in concepts of print.

There is little play time. That is why our program is so needed. Some of these children are NOT ready to be in a program that is that structured yet. Also, with No Child Left Behind, K is going to get even MORE academic!

PM me if you have any other questions and I would be happy to answer them

pin
 
I think it depends on the child...my DS has a February birthday, so he's right in the middle. He's very bright and mature for his age (of course I'm biased :D I do notice a big difference between the girls and boys in the class though. DS is reading at a 2nd grade level according to his teacher, along with 2 girls in the class. Most of the other boys are still working on their letters and sounds at this point in the school year. In my case I think it would have hurt DS if he had an earlier birthday and I decided to wait an extra year, because he would have been bored. My boyfriends son who is the same age is another story....he is not yet comfortable with all day kindergarten and tends to act up later in the day, and has trouble concentrating and keeping up with the class. They're both great kids, but DS was just "ready" while DBF's son would have probably benefited from another year in half day K.
 
I still am freinds with someone I met the first day of kindergarten, I dont like him
 
Beautiful informative post by Pinnie! (Hi Pinnie! :wave2: )

My DS attended the Early 5's program, but in our district it's called "Begindergarten." It was the best decision we ever made too, in as much as we struggled with it at the beginning!

While my DS was in pre-school, his teachers already told us they felt he was not ready for K. So they suggested that my DS take the "gazelle(?)" test, written & oral. He failed miserably. That test helps to determine whether children are truly ready for "K" or not. In the meantime, we also found out he was diagnosed ADHD....so besides starting DS on meds, we also put him thru the "Begindergarten" program. He is now in 2nd grade in a private academic school & doing great (has received all A's & B's on his report card!)

Can your friend inquire about that "gazelle" test? That could set her mind at ease.

Pop Daddy ~ long post for you! ::yes::
 
Hey Blondie! I'm always here, sort of, just don't always have time to post!
Pinnie, that sounds like a great program. Here we don't even have full day kindergarten yet, although I think they are supposed to be starting it within a certain number of years.

I was wondering though, are there somethings that his parents could be doing to get him ready for k now? He can't name all the letters,he can count to 20, and he has lots of trouble with holding the pencil. I bought him a letter tracing book to use on the days I watch him and he was so excited! I said we would work on a few letters and he said no, he wanted to do the whole page and he was going to "work hard" on this book! I gave him a fat pencil and he went to town!It was so cute. Now he did have trouble staying in the lines, but he did not seem frustrated. He would erase and say he "messed that one up" and try again. I was really proud of him. I just worry that his mom will think I was pushing him, but I really just wanted to help and he seemed to be interested and happy.

His preschool is very "play" oriented, not too much academic stuff. They do a letter a week and do some tracing of letters, but it is mostly a social setting, which is great, but I think that maybe he would benefit from some pre-k letter and number work. But I don't want to pressure him or try to make him do things that are frustrating. But how are you supposed to learn how to use a pencil and name letters etc. unless you practice? What do you think?
 
Mishetta, I have never heard of a gazelle test, but I will let her know about it. I was going to suggest that she sign him up for kindergarten and then bring him to the screening that our school does in the spring to see what that showed. I remember that my girls got a report after the screening describing their levels in fine motor, large motor and other things that I don't remember.

Thanks for all the responses!
 
In DS's 4 year old kindergarten class they worked on writing letters, and they're continuing to do it this year in K5. It is something that will only come with practice, so working with him at home is great, but I don't think it's a "requirement" to be able to write them all in our school district. K4 was more play oriented, but the kids also learned some social skills like decribing and presenting things in show and tell every week, learining about the days of the week, following instuctions with simple art projects etc... I think a lot of parents worry about letters and numbers (which are important of course...) but there are other skills that kids learn in a class room setting that are benificial. Does your nephew have a half day K program in his area? Maybe that would be good for the first year and help him transition into all day class?
 
We struggled with this issue with our oldest son (now 11). He has a May birthday. He did not seem socially ready for Kindergarten at age 5. A teacher gave us, what we felt was very wise advice: you can make a mistake by sending too early but you will never make a mistake by waiting. We ended up waiting to send him to Kindergarten until he was six and am very glad we did. Yes, he is almost a complete year older than some fellow classmates but yet has not had to struggle socially or academically like some others have. Athlectics was never a motivating factor for us, but I have heard other parents mention this in regards to their own children.
 
I have two fall babies, my 6 yo DS turned 6 last september and missed the cutoff by just over a week (and he was overdue, if he had been born on time, he would have made it). I am actually really glad, even though academically he is way ahead in his class.

I was at the school for the V-day party with my other child who is also a fall baby and is 5. There was a huge difference in my 5 year old than the other kids in the class. You could just tell she was just a little less mature.

I am actually really glad my kids are older. They are so much more ready for things when they happen. Maybe with a child that was super mature, you could push things, but I really believe kids are better off being one of the older kids.

My neice is an august baby, so is one of the youngest and it has been really hard on her. She is 15 this year and all her friends are 16. She can't drive or date yet. So, when all the other kids can do stuff, she can't because she is still too young.
 
You guys started me thinking, so I decided to look into our local cut off date (DS is only 2 1/2) well he misses the cutoff by ONE day :( I can't believe it. I don't think I want him to be a 6 year old in kindergarten! Apparently this just went into effect last month, it used to be a Dec 1st deadline now Sept 1st.

I guess I have to start thinking about things like this. Bummer thing is like Freshtressa's baby he was born late (8 days) he would have made it in time :(

Tricia
 















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