Vasectomy recovery

[disykat]

I also had to attend a consultation and sign a waiver. They asked if I had any questions. DH has been involved in appts. for every surgery I've had since I got married - both pre and the first post op appts. I'm certainly capable of going through it all myself, and so is he, but to us it's just part of it when it involves any kind of anesthesia, or aftercare, etc. If we can be there, we are.

In the case of OP's questions, if her DH tends to downplay things to her it might be good for her to ask those questions.

Honestly, after how up in my business DH was as part of the childbirth process, neither of us even blinked at the idea of me being involved in his vasectomy.

 

[NHdisneylover]

Well, my wife was required to come to a meeting with the Doctor before my procedure, and had to sign a release that she was aware what I was doing.

yeah. they made me do that too---which felt really weird. why would I be required to sign off on what my spouse does with his body?
I mean, yeah, clearly a healthy relatinship would discuss that and both be good with it----but still shouldn't mean I have any legal say.

 

[NHdisneylover]

I find that odd too. My doctor asked me a few questions about family planning and if I discussed it with my wife but she didn't need to consent. If that was even hinted at I would have found another doctor.

Then again if my doctor tried to give me Valium for this procedure I would have looked elsewhere as well.

In our case, again this was 20 yeas ago, it was required by all doctors (I do not recall if it was state law or an insurane thing, I think it was state law).

 

[Boardwalk Jedi]

I remember making the appointment for DH and the secretary asking if my husband knew I was doing this. LOL

 

[jeff_h]

Mine took a month to be normal after complications, most are fine, but there are possible issues.

That's the same thing I keep thinking as I read several optimistic posts here, as if it were me I wouldn't plan a trip 2-3 days after that procedure, rather I'd reschedule the procedure to another time to be on the safe side.

I didn't have any real complications, but a co-worker did and told me (and this was before I had mine done) that "aww man I hope it goes better for you than it did me, my boys was swelled up big as grapefruits, no lie"... my recovery was routine, but I'm picturing a poor guy trying to start a road trip bringing along a couple of grapefruit with him, ouch!!!

 

[ronandannette]

My husband drove himself to the procedure and then (tmi I know) there was something about him having it done that when he got home I couldn’t resist....and then we went shopping. I think the shopping pushed him over the edge because he started to bleed.

You think it was the shopping?!?

 

[Wishing on a star]

People.... this is a Husband and Wife... Spouses.... acting as one.
YES I have been present at DH's appt's and asked a few questions.
Most recently, he has been thru procedures with his eyes...
There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with that.
Women are used to being the one to have the insight, intuition, and motivation to be the concerned 'caretaker'.
I don't see that to be any issue, AT ALL.

This isn't just a yearly annual doctors appt, or going by to get some antibiotics... A medical procedure is being planned.

And, my husband has occasionally been in that position for me during medical stuff.

Now, I might have an issue with anybody who would judge.
It is their relationship, marriage, way of doing things...
It is not about you.
Don't see anything but positive coming from both being involved.

 

[lifesavacation]

yeah. they made me do that too---which felt really weird. why would I be required to sign off on what my spouse does with his body?
I mean, yeah, clearly a healthy relatinship would discuss that and both be good with it----but still shouldn't mean I have any legal say.

Exactly. My body, my consent. His body, our consent?! Why does someone else get a say in his choice of birth control?

Funny story...my husband went to his primary a couple of years ago and asked for a referral for a vasectomy and the doctor wouldn’t give him one for religious reasons. He told him to research natural family planning instead! Now that’s some messed up medical guidance.

 

[tvguy]

Exactly. My body, my consent. His body, our consent?! Why does someone else get a say in his choice of birth control?
.

I don't think it is a legal requirement I think it is a practice recommended by lawyers to try and protect the Doctor from a "loss of consortium" judgement if a lawsuit is filed.
Seems like every personal injury lawsuit filed now includes a claim of loss of consortium. And as a lawyer friend put it, it is every difficult to not get even a small judgement for loss of consortium.
Now, does loss of consortium include a woman's expectation that her husband be able to father children, and that she be informed of an action that would prevent him from fathering children? I'm not sure. But I wonder if some Doctors who did the procedure without proof that the wife had been informed in advance ended up having to pay a settlement may be at the root of this.

 

[marcyleecorgan]

The look on husband's face when I mentioned this thread, "How would [you] like a trip to Disney on the way home from a vasectomy? We could just stop at Walmart for a bag of peas for your crotch. You don't have to do anything, just sit there."

I think the universe might have created a new black hole with the dark energies being emanated... LOL

 

[wenrob]

Exactly. My body, my consent. His body, our consent?! Why does someone else get a say in his choice of birth control?

Funny story...my husband went to his primary a couple of years ago and asked for a referral for a vasectomy and the doctor wouldn’t give him one for religious reasons. He told him to research natural family planning instead! Now that’s some messed up medical guidance.

Way back when husbands had to sign off on tubal ligations. It was that way as recently as 17 years ago when my sister had hers and my stepfather had to sign off on my mom’s forty years ago.

If there’s anesthesia involved I am there with my DH and he is there with me for consults, procedures etc. It’s not that we can’t handle it ourselves but it’s always good to have someone that will ask questions or remember things you might not.

 

[dish rag]

Exactly. My body, my consent. His body, our consent?! Why does someone else get a say in his choice of birth control?

Funny story...my husband went to his primary a couple of years ago and asked for a referral for a vasectomy and the doctor wouldn’t give him one for religious reasons. He told him to research natural family planning instead! Now that’s some messed up medical guidance.

Florida Hospital in Orlando has certain dietary rules for food served in the hospital and does not allow the Wendy's that is on their property to serve bacon, for religious reasons. How do you feel about this?

 

[lifesavacation]

Florida Hospital in Orlando has certain dietary rules for food served in the hospital and does not allow the Wendy's that is on their property to serve bacon, for religious reasons. How do you feel about this?

Why would I feel anything about a private hospital in Florida that I’ll never go to? I’m confused.

 

[Ben E N]

I drove home from my vasectomy and worked the next day and week. I was a little tender and was shocked when blood came out of places it normally doesn't come out of, but it wasn't anything that required anything more than over the counter painkillers.
If OP is worried about travelling the next day or so, perhaps the doctor performing the surgery can prescribe some more intense painkillers in order to make the trip more tolerable.

 

[NHdisneylover]

Exactly. My body, my consent. His body, our consent?! Why does someone else get a say in his choice of birth control?

Funny story...my husband went to his primary a couple of years ago and asked for a referral for a vasectomy and the doctor wouldn’t give him one for religious reasons. He told him to research natural family planning instead! Now that’s some messed up medical guidance.

Now THAT would send me looking for a new doctor. eegads.

 

[DLgal]

Well, my wife was required to come to a meeting with the Doctor before my procedure, and had to sign a release that she was aware what I was doing.

Pretty sure this is a CA law when you are married. Spouse has to give consent.

 

[tcufrog]

I spoke to my dh and he’s decided to try to postpone the vasectomy.

 

[ronandannette]

Now THAT would send me looking for a new doctor. eegads.

Which is exactly what you should do if you are not satisfied with the services offered or the demeanor of the doctor, no matter the reason. I am firmly in favor of medical professionals having the right to decline to provide services or referrals for matters of conscience. Although changing health-care providers can be inconvenient, it's certainly no major impediment to accessing care and I think everybody's more comfortable when they're on the same page with their doctor.

 

[undertheradar]

Several years ago there was thread about this procedure and many posters were surprised to learn that numerous states require that the spouse sign off on the procedure. My doctor explained that it was to prevent someone from going away for "the weekend," and getting it done without spousal knowledge. Not exactly the ideal weekend getaway in my book.

 

[PrincessShmoo]

yeah. they made me do that too---which felt really weird. why would I be required to sign off on what my spouse does with his body?
I mean, yeah, clearly a healthy relatinship would discuss that and both be good with it----but still shouldn't mean I have any legal say.

I believe it has to do with some lawsuit filed years ago against a doctor that performed either a vasectomy or tubal and the spouse of the individual sued for "alienation of affection" since he/she wasn't aware there were now not going to be any children from the marriage.

I'm not sure it's really a legal thing (granting permission) that has to be done, but doctors are just covering themselves, basically making sure the spouse is aware of the procedure.