to still go or not to still go

[trainboyjon]

4 weeks out and Fiance calls off our disney wedding.... Friends still going, and debating going to hang out with them as part of the healing process. how dangerous could this be for me.. Love the place, but this could be strange. any words of wisdom?

 

[mjshorses]

I'm sorry. I don't have any words or wisdom or advice, I wish I did. I don't know you but please know that I'm sending thoughts and prayers your way.

 

[Firefly09]

I would still go if your friends are planning to as well, have a great time and remember that this place makes you happy. You'll probably have moments where it would be rough but that's likely to happen no matter where you are. But you'll have your friends there to cheer you up and drag you on to another ride or buy you a drink.

 

[princesswendy720]

I'm sorry to hear about this and I hope you are holding up okay.

If it were me, I'd probably still go and spend time with my friends. Just try to avoid thoughts like, we would have been here now doing this. I think it's important to keep Disney as a special place to you and not associate it with negative feelings - having a good time with your friends will definitely do that.

 

[LittleStinkerbelle]

I'm sorry that I don't have any advice but I just wanted to say that I'm very sorry you're going through this.

 

[librarygeek]

So sorry to hear about that.

Ultimately it's up to you and how you are feeling about the whole thing. I think, though, it's important that you do go back to Disney at some point in the near future. Although it might feel weird at first to be there because it will remind you of DF, you don't want to always have those bad feelings associated with Disney. So the sooner you can replace the negative connections with new positive ones (such as with your friends), the better it will be in the long run. So I would definitely try and still go, and rely on your friends as much as possible.

 

[Bewitch324]

Oh, my heart is breaking for you. I am so sorry to hear that you have to deal with this challenge!! If you think you can bear it, I think you should go and have as much fun and joy as you can with your friends. What better place to cheer you up than Disney? Remind yourself that you had a lucky escape (if he can do that to you, it's better to know BEFORE you commit yourself permanently) and that you don't need him to have a wonderful time.

Your friends will help you get through and hopefully you will have some great memories to get you through the rough times. I think it would be more difficult to be at home thinking about what might have been instead of being there having a great time instead. At the very least, at least your friends and the parks will keep you distracted and help get you through.

I'm sorry you are having to deal with this. Take care of YOU!!! Do what feels right to you....you know yourself better than anyone.

Take care,
Brooke

 

[trainboyjon]

this is the he, it was the other half that called it off.. Pretty sure I'm going to go down for the week still. a lot of friends tell me there will be there on "the day" to help pull of the bandaid together. Thank all of you for your thoughts and all, it is a terribly tough time for me right now, but time will heal it sooner or later...

 

[Bewitch324]

sorry about that trainboyjon., I should have paid closer attention to your screen name. But my feelings still say...if SHE can do that, better to know that now!! Go, have fun, and know that the future will hold even better dreams for you!!

Good luck and take care,
Brooke

 

[KristiLyn]

I'm so sorry
If it were me, I'd still go with my friends. I'm sure this trip there will be moments where you will think about your fiance, but you will have your friends there to pick you up. But you can make new memories there at a very happy place, where there are plenty of new memories to be made. And if you go, it'll be easier in the long run, where you wont look at Disney as a negative thing...

 

[DisneyBride1207]

the best advice/wisdom I have is that it's better that it's called off now than later after you are married.... - I'm so sorry

going down with friends may help you feel better - friends are great for a shoulder to cry on!

 

[DoomBuggy0922]

I am SO sorry. My thoughts are with you...

but, GO! Have fun and don't think about the other half. Do something silly--- go to the princess breakfast!--- and just get away from it all.

 

[pezaddict231]

I'm so sorry you're going through this. I think it would be a good idea to go and be with your friends. Disney is obviously an important place to you and I think it will be good to make some happy memories there with your friends. I also think it will be easier to get through this time surrounded by people that care about you.

I would try to avoid where the wedding would have been and things like that. Most of the locations are kind of out of the way, so it should be fairly easy to do.

 

[donald&daisy]

Wow, I am so sorry! I would go, try to have fun, and just begin to adjust to your new reality. I would think it would be easier around friends and family rather than co-workers. You will be in my thoughts.

 

[brer rabbit 28]

So sorry to hear and hope you have good friends around you. I would still go too. Make new memories with friends doing crazy things you hadn't planned to. As another poster said, Disney and Florida are huge enough to avoid the planned venues and have fun.

 

[LittleMissMagic]

Oh my goodness, I am so sorry!

I can't imagine what you're going through, but I think you should go with your friends. It could be strange, but since you love Disney, I think it's important that you don't end your relationship with the World. Try to think of Disney as a happy constant throughout your life.... it has been with you throughout your childhood, and it will continue to be with you throughout the rest of your life.

And like mentioned before, WDW is big enough to avoid the venues you had planned if you don't want to look at that, yet.

 

[Saraheg2107]

I'm sorry to hear that you are going through this.

I will tell you, many many years ago (when I was very young) I was engaged and we had planned a destination wedding. Three weeks before the wedding was to take place we canceled it. It was by far the right decision, the marriage would have ended and ended badly, but that didn't make it any easier. After thinking about it for a few days, I still went on the trip. My entire family and friends were still going, so I decided to go and spend some time with them. I didn't regret it for a second. I was sad for a good portion of the trip, but it ended up helping me heal, and it showed me what a wonderful family that I have. And as you can see from my sig, eventually the right person did come along, and that makes all the difference.

 

[disprincessatheart]

So sorry this happened! I was in about the same position 4 years ago and ended up going to Disney. The difference was my fiancé went too - I'll explain in a sec. Some parts of the trip were hard, but I made sure we went nowhere near the wp or EPCOT ( our planned reception site) on that day. Having friends and family around definitely helped me and I know I would have been a wreck if I'd stayed home and would have been PISSED that they were all in the world without me!

In the end df and I spent the next few months in counseling and worked everything out - lots of fears on his side from watching his parents make lots of bad choices. But no matter how it came out, it was hard to be there, but still better than being anywhere else. Best of luck to you!

 

[Disneybuckeye]

I am so sorry you are going through this and best wishes that the heartache goes away soon. If you want to go then go. I am sure your family and friends will help you get through it and hopefully enjoy yourself. If you do not feel you can handle going I completely understand that also. I truly believe everything happens for a reason and hopefully you will find that reason soon.

 

[sarah_n_brian2006]

I was engaged right before I met my DH. We were 2 months from our wedding. He was in the Navy and stationed in Pearl Harbor. He had been the one to make weeding arrangements there, or so I thought. Three months after the date was 'set,' he told me that he hadn't done anything, and had never said anything to anyone about setting up our wedding. Worst part, I was suspecting him of cheating. That was it, I ended it and met my DH the following night. We became friends and then the rest is history. It was a hard couple of months, but I made it through. My friends helped me through and were a God send.
You are in my prayers and all I can say is wait a couple of years, because, like my ex, karma will hit him. (He got a chick pregnant during a 2-week stay, married her shortly after, calling me the day of to talk him out of it, had 2 kids and she walked out on all three of them after getting hooked on drugs. Its been humerous catching up with him every so often.)