To fire or not to fire

[auntpolly]

I would really appreciate some opinions here from all angles- I really don't know what to do.

There's a lady that has been doing some cleaning for me for a couple of years. She does a great job and I am very happy with her work - once she gets here.

Lately though, since I got back, and for a few months before I left she's had some personal problems and I won't go into them here. I feel bad for her. I've loaned her money. I've understood when she's late.

But now, even though she hasn't paid back the money she owes me she wants another loan, and she's sometimes she doesn't show up at all when I've called her to do work for me. Doesn't come, doesn't call to say she isn't coming.

I told her I'm not sure this is working out and she was so upset. I feel like an ogre. On the one side I feel like mustering up my Christian charity, knowing she's got some stuff going on right now (self- inflicted problems). On the other hand I want to say, keep the money you owe me but I won't be calling any more.

I'm getting so frustrated with her not showing up when I'm expecting her to help me -- but I've talked to her about it 100 times and she always says she's really sorry. I say, "I just need you to call me if you are going to be late or can't come!"

What should I do. I've given her 3 chances - me saying, "if this happens I won't be calling you again. Should I give her another chance?

 

[summerrluvv]

I wouldn't and if she has a key to your place or your alarm code, I would also change the locks.

 

[Serena]

Do you see the situation getting better?

 

[ducklite]

Frankly I'm sure there are plenty of cleaning ladies out there who are also going through a lot of personal problems, and would still have the courtesy and responsibility to call you if they needed to change their plans.

It sounds like this person lacks responsibility and isn't all that trustworthy--not someone I'd want to ahve access to my home.

Unfortuntaly I think I'd have to let her go.

Anne

 

[Allison]

I think I would be done and move on. You have been generous. You have been nice. You have been helpful.

She's not being responsible and you have given her enough chances.

I'm sure it will be hard but I just wouldn't call her anymore.

 

[Pop Daddy]

It depends, is she sexy ?

 

[auntpolly]

I wouldn't and if she has a key to your place or your alarm code, I would also change the locks.

No, I have never given her any key or security codes. When she cleans I am always here with her.

 

[RobinMarie]

What is preventing her from picking up the phone to let you know she is running late/not coming?

 

[auntpolly]

It depends, is she sexy ?

LOL she's very cute! And basically a very sweet person that has messed her life up pretty badly.

 

[auntpolly]

What is preventing her from picking up the phone to let you know she is running late/not coming?

She always has an excuse and frankly they are getting wilder and wilder!

 

[alldiz]

no excuse with not calling....
is she or her kid deathly ill?

if its not to much money....
tell her to keep it and have a nice life
kerri

 

[Serena]

It's not working out. You've been more than kind, it's time to get someone else.

 

[auntpolly]

Do you see the situation getting better?

You mean hers with her personal life? No, I think she has a long road of problems. Which makes me feel even worse because she really needs the money. I just feel she is showing me no respect for all the kindness I've shown her. But maybe I shouldn't be so worried about what I'm getting in return. Maybe she needs help and I should help her. I really am upset about this.

 

[auntpolly]

no excuse with not calling....
is she or her kid deathly ill?

if its not to much money....
tell her to keep it and have a nice life
kerri

I guess I was hoping you'd all say this. Thanks, I guess I needed people to tell me I wasn't a complete witch. If anyone has any different opinions I'd like to hear them, though.

 

[PirateKitty]

She always has an excuse and frankly they are getting wilder and wilder!

Translation=she is lying. I would get rid of her. You did what you thought was right by trying to help her. Unfortunately, it doesn't sound like she's going to change.

 

[RobinMarie]

People who are in dire straits can't think about respecting others, they can only focus on their immediate needs.

In this situation, you have given her three strikes. I think she's out.

She sounds like someone with a personality disorder - I know, I know - I don't have enough info to say that but she does remind me of a few drama queens I've tried to help.

 

[auntpolly]

Translation=she is lying. I would get rid of her. You did what you thought was right by trying to help her. Unfortunately, it doesn't sound like she's going to change.

LOL yes, that's what DH and I think. We're wondering if she'd start stealing from us if she is this desperate! But she's such a good worker, once she starts -- you wouldn't believe how hard she works once she gets going!

 

[Demosthenes]

It's not personal, it's a business decision. If she can't provide the service, you have to let her go. You are doing both of you a disservice by letting her get away with this sort of behavior. She has to learn that this sort of action comes with consequences.

 

[Allison]

LOL yes, that's what DH and I think. We're wondering if she'd start stealing from us if she is this desperate! But she's such a good worker, once she starts -- you wouldn't believe how hard she works once she gets going!

I would be very concerned about that also, especially if she is becoming less responsible and making up crazy excuses.

 

[auntpolly]

She sounds like someone with a personality disorder - I know, I know - I don't have enough info to say that but she does remind me of a few drama queens I've tried to help.

I keep thinking that, honestly! OK, let's say I'm in her shoes and this woman has been helping me. Wouldn't I be at least kissing her butt and showing up on time to keep the gravy train running?

Why is she killing the goose that lays the golden eggs????