The worst possible thing to ask a woman...

[C.Ann]

Oh boy.. This reminds me of something I did a few months ago - and I could have kicked myself from here to Alaska - but I did apologize profusely after I had a few minutes to think about what I said..

A friend of DD's (from up here at the lake) stopped by their house last March - before I came up here.. I hadn't seen her since September and she's lost some weight - she looked absolutely fabulous that day..

Here's the important part: She was not even close to being heavy or overweight the last time I saw her - probably a size 5..

Bit when I saw her, she looked so different.. I don't know if the weight (if you can even refer to weight when you're talking size 5) shifted in different directions or what, but gosh - she looked gorgeous!

So - stupid me exclaimed, "Mary (fake name) - you look gorgeous! Did you lose weight?"

Dumb, dumb, dumb!!!

She didn't seem offended - said "Yeah, I did - a little.. Thanks!"

I went back into my bedroom and then it hit me - what a horrible thing to say!! That sounded like I thought she was "fat" the last time I saw her!!!!

I rushed back out and immediately apologized - and I "think" she understood what I meant - but boy - did that ever teach me a lesson!

I will never comment on someones weight again - unless they ask..

Could it be that the words came out of your neighbors mouth - before her "brain was engaged" - as was the case with me??

I certainly learned my lesson!

 

[smb6]

When I was a teen (long, long time ago) I was working at a gas station and my co worker (who was late 30's, or 40's) asked a customer when they were due. The lady responded she was not pregnant. My co-worker then proceeds to tell her she should go to a dr to find out why her stomach is so swollen. The lady customer ends up in a looong conversation with her discussing her medical problems and such. I was SO embarassed and I was not even in the conversation at all. When the customer finally left, my co-worker continued to say that she sure hopes that lady is able to find out what is wrong..... It was so many years ago, but I can remember it clear as day.... It was horrible at the time, but funny looking back how some people just don't know when to shut up!

 

[Keli]

That was mean. I'm sorry your neighbor did that to you.
I guess I'd think it was more of an accident if she followed up with embarrassment and profuse apologies but the comment about your 'cute' little belly sounds more like a veiled jab at you.

 

[AustinTink]

I just ran into her at the donut shop. Great. Just great.

 

[C.Ann]

I just ran into her at the donut shop. Great. Just great.

How many did she buy?

 

[Breezy_Carol]

I just ran into her at the donut shop. Great. Just great.

You should have told her that if you were going to look pregnant you may as well enjoy some donuts.

 

[mickeysgal]

You should have told her that if you were going to look pregnant you may as well enjoy some donuts.

 

[PrincessKsMom]

Had a stranger ask me once in an elevator. DD was born in November 1995. I was asked this question years after she was born, so my response to "when are you due" was "November __, 1995". Took the person a minute to figure out that was a few years prior. The look I got was priceless.

 

[indimom]

Well, it's too late for this one now, BUT
if she ever pulls this stunt again, respond with a look of doe-eyed innocence and surprise and say "Wow, I was just going to ask you the same thing!!!"

When I was pregnant with my daughter and still had four weeks to go, a male friend from church asked me when I was due and when I told him, he then exclaims "Wow, I thought you were due any day!" Apparently I was quite huge. Of course, maybe he was just psychic - she did come early.

 

[PrincessKsMom]

On the opposite side of this, I had a co-worker who was out on disability fighting cancer. When she came back the cashier said to her "OMG, I haven't seen you in ages. How are you? You look great. Really lost a lot of weight". The woman graciously explained she'd been out sick and the poor cashier wanted to drop through the floor. Commenting on anyone's weight without any background is dangerous either way.

 

[Tazicket]

Had somebody not only ask me if I was pregnant, but continue to insist that I must be after I told her that I wasn't. She even put her hand on my stomach and told me it felt like a baby belly.

My response? "No - it feels like pizza and Doritos."

 

[KJ Luvs Pluto]

On the opposite side of this, I had a co-worker who was out on disability fighting cancer. When she came back the cashier said to her "OMG, I haven't seen you in ages. How are you? You look great. Really lost a lot of weight". The woman graciously explained she'd been out sick and the poor cashier wanted to drop through the floor. Commenting on anyone's weight without any background is dangerous either way.

It's not just commenting on weight. When I was bald from chemo I would have people exclaim "Oh my gosh - what happened!!!" Of course I didn't wear a wig or a scarf and I hated wearing my hat so it often came off. When they were rude and obnoxious about it I would say that I was never again going to let my husband cut my hair, because he just went crazy with the clippers and I ended up with a bald head. People believed me! Or I would come up with another crazy story. I'm sure there are places where women shave their heads for no reason but where I live if a women is bald, there is a reason, people don't have to ask - What happened .


Tazicket: Oh my gosh - someone actually put there hand on your stomach and said that!! But I loved your response. Thanks for the laugh. I wish I could think that fast on my feet.

To the OP - I think the person who said that to you is just green with envy over the fact that you are a size 6 and she is not.

 

[PrincessKsMom]

It's not just commenting on weight. When I was bald from chemo I would have people exclaim "Oh my gosh - what happened!!!" Of course I didn't wear a wig or a scarf and I hated wearing my hat so it often came off. When they were rude and obnoxious about it I would say that I was never again going to let my husband cut my hair, because he just went crazy with the clippers and I ended up with a bald head. People believed me! Or I would come up with another crazy story. I'm sure there are places where women shave their heads for no reason but where I live if a women is bald, there is a reason, people don't have to ask - What happened .


Tazicket: Oh my gosh - someone actually put there hand on your stomach and said that!! But I loved your response. Thanks for the laugh. I wish I could think that fast on my feet.

To the OP - I think the person who said that to you is just green with envy over the fact that you are a size 6 and she is not.

I'm glad you had such a great sense of humor about it. It can't be easy and I think sometimes people speak before thinking.

 

[Disneylover79]

I guess I shouldn't be proud of this but...I USED to get that all and I mean all the time..I used to have a little pudgie belly and I used to get that line and I would just come right back with "no I am just fat, Thanks" I mean really who does that!!!

 

[PrincessKsMom]

I guess I shouldn't be proud of this but...I USED to get that all and I mean all the time..I used to have a little pudgie belly and I used to get that line and I would just come right back with "no I am just fat, Thanks" I mean really who does that!!!

When I was pregnant with DD, I had a t-shirt that said "I'm not fat I'm pregnant". Now I could use the "I'm not pregnant, I'm fat" version.

 

[redlight]

You should have told her that if you were going to look pregnant you may as well enjoy some donuts.

Good answer.

 

[si-am]

I've gotten asked that a lot in recent years, not because I'm fat or overweight, but because of the big flowy babydoll tops that are so in style now. I love those things (so comfy, no sucking in required!) but they do make everyone look pregnant. Especially me, I guess!

 

[LuvLDM]

"Are you pregnant?" No, I'm not. "Oh because you have a cute little belly right now."

My neighbor asked me this in front of a group of people tonight and I could have decked her.

Honestly, I think she was just being mean. I'm no stick figure, but geez I wear a size 6.

Your neighbor should be poked in the eye w/ a sharp stick. What a witch.

 

[AustinTink]

Had somebody not only ask me if I was pregnant, but continue to insist that I must be after I told her that I wasn't. She even put her hand on my stomach and told me it felt like a baby belly.

My response? "No - it feels like pizza and Doritos."

Yes, I forgot to mention the neighbor did this to me, also. She rubbed by belly like I was Buddha. Of course, this is now my new nickname around the house.

 

[AustinTink]

Your neighbor should be poked in the eye w/ a sharp stick. What a witch.

I think I had that daydream a few times today.